Thou shalt not jump onto the keyboard
when thy human is using the computer.
Thou shalt not pull the phone cord out
of the back of the modem.
Thou shalt not unroll the toilet paper
off the roll.
Thou shalt not sit in front of the television
or monitor as thou are not transparent.
Thou shalt not walk in on a dinner party
and commence licking thy butt.
Thou shalt not lie down with thy butt
in thy human's face.
Fast as thou art, thou cannot run
through closed doors.
Thou shalt not leap from great heights
onto thy human's lap.
Thou shalt not climb on garbage cans with hinged
lids, as thou wilt fall in and trap thyself.
Thou shalt not reset thy human's alarm clock
by walking on it.
Thou shalt realize that the house is not a
prison from which to escape at any opportunity.
Thou shalt not trip thy humans
even if they are walking too slow.
Thou shalt not push open the bathroom door
when there are guests in thy house.
Thou shalt remember that thou art a carnivore
and that houseplants are not meat.
Thou shalt show remorse when being scolded.
