The EarthBound Gang
Issue 100
Monday, August 09, 1999
Part 5 of 10
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The EarthBound Community
The EarthBound Community is a sumerization of all of the EarthBound Clubs combined as a community. Back about 1 year ago, over 50 Earthbound clubs existed. Now, we are down to 3. I bring you a small history and a couple of interviews to give you some detail. IF you haven't read part 3. Read it now, it gives you more information about the EBGang in particular.

Top 5 clubs in my opinion!
1. The EarthBound Gang
2. The Mr. Saturn Nation
3. The Desert Monkies
4. The Sharks
5. The Flying Men


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The Man they call Loma
by Loma himself

This article is about Loma359, He has been with the Sharks for a long time, and now, he has wrote about most of their/his history. Please take a few minutes to read it.
EBGNess

Well, our good ol' friend Deaf asked me to write some damned article about myself or something like that, so I guess I have to write this. Please, if you have any dignity, SKIP OVER THIS ARTICLE, PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! Anyways, now that that's over....

First we'll start with who I am. I am Loma. Not Lomas. Not dead. LOMA. Since AOL waS smoking crack when they decided not to let apostrophes be allowed in SNs, I cannot make Loma's Dead. So I settled for Lomas Dead. Well, the road that I traveled to my current position is long, boring, and annoying, so if you hate this sort of stuff, please skip this article for your own good. Anyways, Nintendo used to have an area on AOL, called the Nintendo Power Source, or the LoudHouse(LH). Eventually, like all things that are decent, left AOL and went to the web. Alot of our computers back then couldn't handle the webchat, so we made a Town Square room, called the Power Circuit, and went there. Well, SeCtoR X19, AKA SLTIM, AKA CATAPULT19, had started coming to the NPS just before it was shut down. When we made the new room, naturally, he came along.

For some reason, SeC made a club, AON, or the Army of Nintendo. The purpose of AON was to raid Gamepro, because frankly, Gamepro sucks, and it was something we used to do back in the old NPS. So, we set up scheduled raids, and raided the hell out of Gamepro. But then, SeC became an ass to me. He kept yelling at me for no reason. So, I decided to destroy AON. I bluffed about how many allies I had, etc etc, and SeC fell forr it, when infact, I only had TriggaTra, my best friend, and the VP, who was spying for me. SeC disbanded the AON, And moved onto the Sharks....which caused the EB Scene to flourish. So, in a way, I helped start the EB Scene. Scary, huh? We'll skip the stupid parts of the sharks history next (IE the stupid peace parts where everyone was happy. I hate those). Well, the first major conflict I got into was the Lucky EB3 mess, or something like that. Using my skills (I'll brag if I damn well please), I manageed to take him down from the inside.

Then, BLu left the club or something, for some reason I forget at this moment. I thought BLu was in the right, so I left too. SeC then came into the Town Square room(It's near the beginning if you forget what I am speaking of), and started to yell at Me, Kit, and a few others. This basically made me turn against SeC. I joined the anti-sharks, and we proceeded to try to harm/destroy SeC. Deafcon2(AKA EBG NESS), then leader of the now-defunct EBUN, decided that I was the ringleader of the movement, blahblahblahblah, and tried to get the entire EBUN to go to war with me. (NOTE- The EBUN consisted of 12 odd clubs.) I, however, had allies in most of the clubs, and they threatened to leave the EBUN if it tried to take action against me. We(the anti-sharks), later listed a list of demands, and sent them to SeC. The last one ("SeC must resign at or soon after Issue 50"), was heavily contested to Deaf, and we almost had to fight him because of it. But, SeC had no problem with this, so another conflict was averted.

While I was gone for a day, SeC left AOL. I missed his damn leaving party. I still feel bad about that. Well, SeC gave the club to Nik, and Nik tried to lead his club, the Flying Men, and the sharks. Anyways, we had several major conflicts with Deaf and the Jenova Project during this time. Each time, as far as I recall, we either reached a treaty, or Deaf surrendered to us. We were just starting work on the EBC(EarthBound Community), when my account was TOSed/hacked/etc into oblivion, cutting me off from the people on AOL. I managed to send a few letters to John McCEB, and Nikolai64 before my comp died, luckily.

When I came back, in May, the first person I spoke with was Deaf. He told me the sharks were near dead, and that the EBG was the main club now, and he lead it. I called him a liar, and laughed at him. Oh, was I wrong...everything he said was true. I could not believe that the sharks, what I had been fighting for protect for years, had finally collapsed, and was in a near death state. This article is already too big, so I'll stop with the history now.

I have to list my hobbies or something, so here goes:
Playing video/computer games (IE Starcraft, Warzone 2100, Civ2:ToT), reading, watching MST3K, watching various other TV shows, Capture the flag, MUDing, making fun of Tmgiygas and other foolish newbies, etc.

Anyways, that's everything I feel like telling about me. If you managed to survive this article, e-mail me and I'll try and get you a token or two.

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The history of the Rowdy Mice (An EB Club)
Hi fellow EB Gangers, your president EBG Ness asked me to write an article about mine and NATHENDO1's former club "The Rowdy Mice". The history of the Rowdy Mice can't be started without an introduction to how the club was formed, in late January or early February of 1998, I was just 3 months into my tenure in the Sharks, I believe I had joined a few other clubs right before this fateful day, including the EarthBound Gang. After one meeting trickled down for the Sharks, me, Ness 19 (now CreamdCrn), Nikolai64, and Matingly22 were left as the only members in the chat. I realized that I was among 3 club leaders (and good ones at that), for Ness lead the Ness's Followers, Nikolai the Flying Men, and Matingly, the Mr.Saturn Nation. I told them how I wished to be "trendy" (haha, just joking) and start a club (actually I really wanted to try to make it good) The guys supported me as I was starting to become a good member in the clubs. Ness and Matingly even gave me their mailing lists so I can use to get members (not many responded though to join) Due to the 3 of their support I boosted them slightly in the rankings and got the first NL sent out. To describe it, short, no substance, and totally lame. A carbon copy (and bad one at that) of the other clubs at the time. To me it looked good but now in hindsight, it was terrible. Getting these people into the meetings was even worse. The best we ever had was maybe 7, and in the first meeting a certain member wouldn't stop scrolling (I'm not naming names because I didn't even mind, it didn't bother me, just harmless fun) During our last meeting, a member NATHENDO1 asked if I wanted to start a club with him. I still liked the idea of having a club, and with extra assistance I thought it would be a good way to propell our club with the big boys. It did, for awhile. The newsletters were good and frequent at first, and with our 2 different personalities, depending on who wrote it, it was variety. But, the bug called laziness, and computer problems for both of us, as well as allowing members that were fake harmed the club and the reputation. Despite those rocky times, we were still in a war with the Flying Men for 5th biggest club, and we wouldn't frequently change who was 5th largest and 6th largest. Around this time, SeCtoR X19, the best leader of the Sharks published a Top 20 clubs list, we were 5th in size and given a B rating. But that was about the end of the club. I was working on a newsletter but after not seeing Nathendo in a while it was never published. Early in 99 we were planning to remake the club, but decided against it. While never the greatest club, and probably only a small part if a history book of AOL EB clubs were made, the Rowdy Mice remain important to me. And if anyone happened to have been in it, and had saved the newsletters, please e-mail them to me, and I will try to reward you in some way. Goodbye, and godspeed.


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The History of the Mr. Saturn Nation (An EB Club)

What's up fellow EBG-ers, this is Matingly22! I was told to write a little history about my club, the Mr Saturn Nation. I usually don't listen when people tell me stuff, but I decided to write this.
Well, to start off, I bet 80 percent of yous have never heard of the Mr Saturn Nation. We started off in January of 1998, with about 5 members. At the time I honestly had never heard of any other Earthbound clubs, including the EB Gang and the Sharks. We started off pretty crappy, but I thought we were good..which made me want to continue. Soon after the 2nd newsletter we held our first meeting, which contrasted with the EB Gang's meeting. Both of them were at 7PM Saturdays. Me, not knowing of an EB Gang, had no clue of this! So, in my very first meeting, I was raided by Onettness and friends! Now to think of it, it was one of the best things that ever happened to us. We became pretty popular afterwards, reaching 100 members by the 6th newsletter, and 200 by the 10th.
The club basically sucked up to..maybe the 13th or 14th newsletter. We were become one of the biggest and most respected clubs around, nevertheless. For awhile we were at the level of the Sharks and the EB Gang..full meetings, great participation, and so on(By the way if your still reading this by now you're a nut!). I don't know exactly where it went downhill..it never really did actually, just I couldn't lead it anymore. There were a couple of failed leadership changes, and I am still planning on bringing the club back(I already have a newsletter planned, and am recruiting members).
Some of the highlights of the club were the main features, which was an in-depth story about something having to do with Earthbound, the video games section, the member interview(yes,WE started them!), and more. Our highest member total was around 430(we surpassed the EB Gang for like a day!), we had several full meetings that went for hours, and I can go on. Our colors were white and navy blue if you cared, and our newsletter total was 25. We were also called the Mr Saturn Gang for awhile..I like that name better but the members voted for "Nation" instead of "Gang".
I think it was cool how the Earthbound Gang's trying to hurt us actually helped make us one of the premier clubs. I'm extremely grateful for that now, and to put it in "wrestling" terms..they made our monkey asses famous!
If you would like to know anything else about the MSN feel free asking..I have almost every newsletter and more. Well that's it..thanks for reading! Peace y'all!

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History of Ness's Followers
Ah, the memories... I once led Ness's Followers, a 100 member EB club, in november of 97. It bombed in 6 months. But it's legacy lives on in some clubs you see. I pioneered a few newsletter technquies, like the member of the year. Who that was, I have no idea. But I was fooling around. One guy came to me and claimed he could get me 200 members. I said, uh, no. And just dismissed him. Next week, I got on to see over 200 names in my box. That guy was like CMG something-or-other... I don't remember, but he was my best member. Ness's Followers had all the "celebrities" of the EB Comunity. We weren't a big club, but we WERE in the top 20 EB Clubs of All time! SectorX19 himself once wrote an article I liked about the top 20 eb clubs ever. We were somewhere around 15, I do believe. We were at the height of our game, when I began my claim to fame, the EBJ. The EarthBound Journal was the brainchild of my complaints with the comunity. It was for everyone who read a newsletter and said "I HATE him. That guy is soooo annoying" The EBJ was just the forum to vent my anger. It wasn't good in Ness's Followers, but it flourished on it's own. It grew to a subscription list of about 50 (pretty good at the time). OnettNess had alot to say about it, and I'd have to say he was a big help in the whole production of the thing. The EBJ was a failed expiriment, though. It crashed and burned one day when I asked for ALL the readers who shared my veiws, hates my veiws, or existed at all to drop me an e-mail. When I got 3 e-mails, I shut down the whole thing. Deafcon2 (as EBG Ness was know) Told me that he frequently got e-mail about it, but wouldn't ever send me any of it (ha.). Another of my "claims to fame" was my webpage skills. I had very little, and learned it all by way of the great BearBear13, but they took me far. Many people saw my work and liked it. I just never stuck with one page. But back to NF. It began in november, when I talked to Gygas9813 (he's gone now) and he said, my club just started. I said I'd make my own. I was already a Shark and an EB Gang Member, WAY back in 97, almost 2 years ago. I never did a whole lot in them, but I slowly worked up. A year passed, in which I was one of the most famous members of the community, and frequently TALKED to high ranking members. It was then that I found the greatest thing ever in EB history, to me. It was called the Late Nite EB Chat. Every few nights, for about a month, a group of less than 10 of us got in a chat and pretty much... talked. OAFrankFly, BearBear13, Myself, and CrazedMogX as he was then known were all there. Once, the longest chat I've been in, was me, Crazed, and I BELIEVE BearBear. It was 3 people.. no, Nikolai64, i think. Nik was quite the weird one.. Well, the Late Nite EB Chat was never once about EB... once, OAFrank and BearBear debated who cut more wood, thus, who had more chest hair. Times like that make me remember those days... hahaha.... Well, I've had my 15 minutes, thrown in my 2 cents, and took out a few bucks, so I'll take the money and run (CLICHE OVERLOAD!!).... If ANYONE out there wants to hear from me some more, drop me a line at CreamdCrn@aol.com or IM me... I'm usually on. See ya later... RIP Ness's Follower's, one of the 20 greatest EB Clubs of ALL TIME! Ha, that's laughable... Catch Ya on the Flipside...thanks for the years. - Creamed Corn (Alex to some)


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EarthBound Gang Interviews
Tonight We welcome AAVP MibXXagent, and AVP MichaelD9

MibxxAgent's interview

EBG Ness: Welcome to the EarthBound Gang Interview.
EBG Ness: We just got done talking to Dave.
MiBxxAgent: ok
EBG Ness: So today, We talk to MibXXagent!
EBG Ness: Hey MiB!
MiBxxAgent: hey EBG
EBG Ness: Whats new
MiBxxAgent: nothing realy...
MiBxxAgent: well at my job...
MiBxxAgent: i got a raise!!!
EBG Ness: Really? Interesting.
EBG Ness: What have you been up to lately?
MiBxxAgent: from $7 to $10 an hour
MiBxxAgent: well...
MiBxxAgent: ive been working this week mostly
EBG Ness: Thats not bad!
MiBxxAgent: ive been doing my summer work
MiBxxAgent: for school
EBG Ness: What do you do?
MiBxxAgent: i hate it
MiBxxAgent: i have to ready 6 books and do this math junk
EBG Ness: Really? What grade you in?
MiBxxAgent: ive been learning some Visual Basic and PhotoShop
MiBxxAgent: im going into 6th grade
EBG Ness: at 6th Grade. Not bad.
EBG Ness: So, What is your rank in the EBGang?
MiBxxAgent: ya
MiBxxAgent: AAVP #1
MiBxxAgent: (the first AAVP)
MiBxxAgent: Jon ls God is AAVP #2
MiBxxAgent: thats what it said in the newsletter
EBG Ness: Well, thats right.
EBG Ness: What do you think of the EBGang?
MiBxxAgent: I think it has great potential to becoming...
MiBxxAgent: the biggest club on AOL
MiBxxAgent: its getting closer
EBG Ness: I hope it does.
EBG Ness: What is it like being AAVP?
MiBxxAgent: I also thing AOL should let us have a confrence room
MiBxxAgent: its great!!!
MiBxxAgent: i get more work to do
EBG Ness: LoL..
MiBxxAgent: i feel i have power which i dont really have in CT
EBG Ness: Any last things you would like to say to the club?
MiBxxAgent: Technoligy will soon be the center of the Universe (hopefully)
MiBxxAgent: by the way...
EBG Ness: Ok, I'll remember that.
MiBxxAgent: just for the EBG's reference
MiBxxAgent: i suck at spelling
MiBxxAgent: LoL
MiBxxAgent: thanks for having ME ness!
EBG Ness: Well, we will all remember that YOU SUCK at spelling.
EBG Ness: No problem.
EBG Ness: Thanks for coming.
EBG Ness: This is EBGNess signing off!

MichaelD9's Interview

EBG Ness: ::Welcome to the EarthBound Gang Interviews.
EBG Ness: This week, Like I said before, we are going to
EBG Ness: interview all the officers and the Apple of
EBG Ness: Enlightment. Today... I have here AVP#1
EBG Ness: MichaelD9
EBG Ness: Hey Mike!
Michael D9: Hey Ness
EBG Ness: What's going on with you today?
Michael D9: I went to the beach today for a bit, but it looked like it was going to rain, so me and my
Michael D9: friends went back
EBG Ness: Really? I'm heading out this weekend to the beach.
Michael D9: cool
Michael D9: I'm saving up my arcade points for a Dreamcast _
EBG Ness: So. You are the operator of the EarthBound Gang Radio?
Michael D9: Yep
EBG Ness: Whats it like?
Michael D9: It's really fun. I did some broadcasting before and I enjoyed it. I thought that having an
Michael D9: Earthbound Gang Radio would be fun, so I did it.
EBG Ness: Well, now that you got it working, it seems to be
EBG Ness: a huge success. I have a lot of people ready and
EBG Ness: eager to sign on to it!
Michael D9: I'm glad
EBG Ness: How did that last stress test go?
Michael D9: It went pretty well with the exception of my brother pestering me
Michael D9: I think I can up the bit rate by a little also
Michael D9: So the quality of the music is better
EBG Ness: Yes. The music quality was good. And so was the WAV of PoliceN64
EBG Ness: So. Tell us. What do you think of the EarthBound Gang??
Michael D9: I think that it's the best club that I have been in so far
Michael D9: It keeps me interested in Earthbound although the game has been out for four years
Michael D9: There are lots of contests and I am proud to be the AVP
EBG Ness: And our good ole' friends. What do you think of the Sharks??
Michael D9: Well, the Sharks used to be a really cool club, but when SeC left, everything fell apart
Michael D9: It was a mistake to have 3 people lead in the beginning
Michael D9: It's just not as interesting as it used to be
EBG Ness: Hmm.. That happens.. and It will happen to us someday. I hope it will be a while.
EBG Ness: So, how do you like being AVP?
Michael D9: I think that it's really cool
Michael D9: I always like to help the club in anyway I can and being AVP makes it official
EBG Ness: Is there anything else you want to say to the EBGang?
EBG Ness: Issue 100.. Everyones reading.
EBG Ness: Anything you want to say?
Michael D9: ANIME RULES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Michael D9: hehe
Michael D9: Oh yeah, and I will take a giant leap into the business world'
EBG Ness: LoL... You are into Anime!! What do you do? I heard you had something going for a while.
Michael D9: Once I have everyting set, I'll tell you guys about it, but for now, it's a secret
Michael D9: Yeah, I had a fansub distro. I distribute anime tapes to people and, well, FUNimation, the
Michael D9: people who bring DBZ to the U.S. didn't like it that I had Japanese tapes of DBZ and shut
Michael D9: down my site
Michael D9: Plus my mom couldn't go to the post office every day to mail out tapes
EBG Ness: Those corporate bastards. I tell ya, they
EBG Ness: should know their roll. Did you have a lot of
EBG Ness: customers?
EBG Ness: Well.
Michael D9: I did, actually. I got about 10 a week
EBG Ness: So, it was a pretty good buisness eh?
Michael D9: I'm busy now sending the checks back to everyone
Michael D9: Yeah, it was
Michael D9: I didn't use the money I got for personal gain, I used it for more tapes that I could give
Michael D9: to them
EBG Ness: Yeah.. I tell ya.. They rip you off.
EBG Ness: How did they find you? Were you a big advertised company?
Michael D9: Nope
Michael D9: I put my name on the Anime Web Turnpike which everyone visits
Michael D9: www.anipike.com
Michael D9: It's pretty popular and once I added my site I had 450 people visit a week
EBG Ness: Wow.. and they had there little corporate spy people after you eh?
Michael D9: Not really
Michael D9: This person who didn't like fansubs e-mailed me for my address and asked for tapes
Michael D9: I gave it to him and he told FUNimation
Michael D9: If I ever find that person again, I will beat him to a bloody pulp
Michael D9: I didn't know it was illegal also because a local flea market sells DBZ tapes also
EBG Ness: Throw a tape at him hehe..
Michael D9: LoL
EBG Ness: Then again, The flea market is the most legal place in the world you know.
EBG Ness: They never sell illegial stuff.
Michael D9: yeah, except for this guy
Michael D9: He charged 10 bucks a tape!
Michael D9: I charged 18 for 3 and that included shipping!
EBG Ness: That is a damn good price.
Michael D9: Some other site sells it for 3 bucks a tape, I don't know how he does it!
Michael D9: Probably a con
EBG Ness: How does he make money.
EBG Ness: HA! I bet he moves a lot.
EBG Ness: Anyway, That is about all the time we have for this week.
EBG Ness: MichaelD9, Thanks for Dropping by.
EBG Ness: And this is EBGNess Signing off!!

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The EarthBound Gang Newsletter
Issue 100
Monday, August 09, 1999
EBGNess
The EarthBound Gang

EB Gang News™

8-9-99 Issue 100 8-9-99

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Written by: EBG Ness@aol.com
Editted, Decorated and Spellchecked by: OnettNess@aol.com

Anime Answered
By: Michael Dinerstein

Last week I explained to you basically what anime is and how it gets ruined when it comes to the U.S. In this article, I am going to show you a way to get anime uncut and a heck of a lot better. Here is the vocabulary for this week:

Fansub subtitler - A place where they import tapes from Japan and use a machine to subtitle the tape. They then give them to the distros.

Fansub Distro - A place that distributes fansubs from fansub subtitlers.

I would recommend getting tapes from the fansub distros that I list at the bottom because they are reliable, fast, and completely legal. If you don't like these places for whatever reason, then you can venture off to find your own. I suggest using www.anipike.com because they have the best listings. This article will mainly focus on the Do's and Don't when picking out fansub distros and what to watch out for. Let's start with the Do's:

DO…:
1. …Follow all the rules on the page before submitting your tape order.
2. …Be sure to be friendly; people who own the sites are under a lot of pressure, trust me I've been there.
3. …Make sure you get a good price for the tapes. They usually run for 3 tapes for $18. Some are a little more and some are a little less.

Now onto the Don'ts…

DON'T…:
1. …Order tapes from a person that has a slim list of tapes. They could be a fake.
2. …Keep asking when the tapes will reach to you, many people will delay tapes even further if you ask
3. …Purchase tapes that are extra-cheap, the people that are running the site will probably take your money extra-fast.
4. …Buy from a site that looks like it just opened up, it will take long to get your tapes and it could be a fake.

Those are just all the things that you should do and that you should not do while looking and buying tapes. Now that you have all of this information, you should ask yourself what tapes should I get. For most people, Dragonball Z would be their first choice while Sailor Moon would be their second. Those series are licensed and should NOT be sold on any fansub site, but there are still many that have those tapes and I suggest you get them fast because companies that licensed the show will try to shut them down. I would suggest getting one Dragonball Z tape and possibly one Sailor Moon one. However, there are other anime series that are better than those. I would definitely look into getting Yu Yu Hakusho, Gundam Wing, and Flame of Recca. Those anime series are my top three favorite of all time. They all have cool fight scenes like DBZ and an awesome storyline. Gundam Wing is my all time favorite though. Now that my article is done and my hands are cramped, I will list the sites where to get the tapes:

http://members.tripod.com/accord127
http://www.planetnamek.com (Click on Fansubs)
Those are basically the two sites where I get my tapes. If you want others, you should E-Mail me or search for them on www.anipike.com. If you have any further questions, I encourage you to E-Mail me at MichaelD9@aol.com also.Next week's topic: Now that you have your tapes, what can you do next. Goodbye!

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Chrono Trigger Game Review
Hey what's up? The game Chrono Trigger is a wildly popular game. "The
last great SNES RPG game..." Nintendo Power says. The game ranked #19
on the 100 best games. That includes N64 games too! It seems to be
one of the best games ever made on the SNES. The tale of Chrono and his
adventures is great. Plus multiple endings depending on when you fight
Lavos. You can't help but like it! The game is great pure and simple.

Graphics 8.4 out of 10
Hey it isn't exactly your best graphical game. But the graphics are good
considering the fact that Super Mario RPG came out later and still didn't
look that good. I mean come on, They all look a little round in the game
compared to Chrono Trigger. The graphics are very good for SNES. I would
venture to say that it ranks among the highest of all.

Music and Sound 10 out of 10
You couldn't ask for better music and sound. From the Chrono theme to
the final battle with Lavos. The music takes all other games on head
first. They are some of the best pieces of music I've ever heard. The
sound effects are tremendously good. From the sound of the Luminaire
to the sound of Lavos, they don't get much better than this. Compared
to Zelda: A Link to the Past these sounds are tops. One tends to get
board with the same sound over and over and over again, but in Chrono
Trigger, you have a different sound for each place on the map. As well
as a theme for each character. Yes music is repeated but hey, you have
to do that. Just don't make it constant.

Game Challenge 10 out of 10
VERY VERY good game challenge. You can't help it. You may have beaten
Lavos but have you seen everything? From the wooden sword to the
rainbow it takes the cake. You have to earn the right to beat Lavos.
Also have you gotten all of your characters to level 99? Or found e
very rock for the triple tech? I highly doubt it, although it is possible.
Would you rather have a game like Super Mario RPG that is too easy
or Chrono Trigger which is right there in the middle. Not to hard, not
to easy, but just right. Loads of fun! Its a great game challenge for all ages.

Game Play-Fun 9.5 out of 10
It may not be the most fun game in the world but it is a lot of fun to play.
See it all from the Town Square to The Day of Lavos. You gotta love it
its very fun to play and also very challenging. You choose the destiny
of the planet, life or death? (Reffer to game challenge) The game is so
good it would top almost any game. You gotta play it. Once you do you'll
be hooked on it for a long, long time.

Frustration
You may not be to happy about the Golem Twins but just go level up.
You don't get to frustrated on this game because you are in direct control.
Sure you have to follow some steps until you reach the spot where you
loose Chrono but from there on out you don't get to frustrated. Especially
if you use the New game, that gives you the spells, items, armor, money,
and everything else. Now that's what I call loosing the frustrations.

Replayability 9.9 out of 10
You can always find something new in this game every time you replay it.
You can get another ending like one where Frog goes in alone to fight
Magus or when Marle and Lucca do a check up on the type of guy they
like (of course Marle's is Chrono). You will have fun no matter how many
times you play it.

Game Value 100 out of 10
It is worth the price no matter what it is. From playing it, I have learned
to love the game. You can fight Lavos at your first meeting with the Old
Man or after Blowing the Black Omean to microbits. You will never find a
game that is worth its price more than this one. It is the best! I'm not
telling you because magazines say so, but because I know so! I've play
the game, I've beat it, and I still haven't gotten all the rocks for the triple
techs. Hey it makes you just keep coming back to it. It's great and a great
game all together.

Overall 100 out of 100
I conclude that this is the best RPG ever to hit SNES. You can't do any better
than it. Its a classic game and there is no reason not to like it unless you hate
RPGs. If you are an RPG lover, play this game. If you haven't, YOU DON'T KNOW

ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ
ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ
ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ

Final Fantasy III Game review
Welcome to FF3. The third installment in the Final Fantasy (US)
series is the best one yet! Squaresoft outdid themselves again
with this title. 1,000 years after the War of the Magi, the war
that nearly made humans extinct, things seem safe for the future.
But "magic", the force that was the entire purpose of the War of
the Magi, is coming back. A frozen "Esper" has been found in Narshe,
a large industrial city in the north. Espers are the sources of magic.
Now, the evil Empire is attempting to restore magic and take the
Esper, then conquer the world. But there is a band of rebels in their
way: The Returners! Meet the magic-using Terra, the thief (oops,
treasure hunter) Locke, the adorable Mog, and many other characters
as you try to stop Kefka!

Graphics 10 out of 10
The artists that did the game put things together well. The characters
don't look so chunky, like they seemed in the previous Final Fantasies.
The background designs in the battle scenes were drawn well, and make
it seem like you're in the desert, river, whatever. Spells look really
cool in this game, ranging from a simple Fire spell to the greatest of
all, Ultima! Characters have many different poses and looks, depending
on their status and emotions. You can even see them blush! The Chocobo
(ostrich-like birds) and the Airship views were done in brilliant Mode 7.
Great work by Squaresoft on the whole!

Music and Sound 9 out of 10
The music and sound effects sounded like they should. The music sounded
like it was appropriate for the scene at hand. The Airship contains an upbeat
track that can get annoying. The nice thing about the music is that you can
tell whether a city is friendly or not, or if a certain thing is going on (the
castle is under attack, etc.) The battle music can often get tedious as well.
The sound effects for the spells were great, sounding just like you'd imagine.
The exceptions: Ice and Bio come to mind. Character attack effects were
good, again sounding like a real weapon should sound. There should have
been multiple "miss" sounds, though, depending on your weapon. Great
work here, too, but it could use a little touching up.

Game Challenge 9.5 out of 10
Challenge? You're asking me about the game's challenge? Believe me
when I tell you, this game is TOUGH! It is required that you build
levels if you want to progress. You may find yourself spending hours
at a time building levels and learning spells! Also, there are a few "two
and two together" puzzles, such as one in Locke's scenario (consult the
manual.) What are you supposed to do with a Clock Key? Wind a clock!
This opens a door. There were some parts in the game where a little
less challenge would have been nice (crushing ceiling in the Zone eater.)
The main battle tight spot is when you have less than 4 characters and
one of them falls. You only get minimal HP when you restore life with
an item, so it can be hard to get up to speed. Great job!

Game Play-Fun 10 out of 10
FF3 has many good hours of play, plus a battery-backed save feature.
The game timer will stop at 99:59, but it is quite possible to go well
past that. The number of "steps" is also recorded, making it possible
to have contests with the count. For example, how few steps can you
take to get Mog in your party? An NP reader got 4,735. It's fun going
through the game and watching events unfold, especially in the cinema
scenes. There are a couple of funny bits, and some things may be
confusing at times. But other than that, this is a great, not to mention
fun game.

Frustration
The game can be frustrating, when you can't beat a boss or solve a
puzzle. A couple hints: Listen to townspeople. Sometimes they can give
you the clue you need. GAIN EXP. If you aren't at a high level (55) when
you try to defeat Kefka for the last time, you're in trouble. And lastly,
STICK WITH IT. Go through for a great ending! The bosses are always
challenging, and it may take many tries to beat them. I don't have much
else to say. All in all, those who keep trying will win.

Replayability 10 out of 10
Replayability? It never gets better. There are many different ways to
go through the game, because it's so easy to make it harder. Some
answers can influence your game greatly. For example, at the banquet
(midgame) what you say can change a lot. Minus the Tintinabar could
make you lose a lot of fights. If you ever get tired of the game, the
Game Genie (R) can change things forever too. And if all else fails,
sell the game. You can make a lot of money since the game is out of stock.

Game Value 10 out of 10
My copy was for $55 (that was with S&H.) It was worth the cash. You'll
get a lot of replay value and fun value out of this game. Not much else here.
Controls & Options 9 out of 10
The game's control setup works well, and its two-player battle is a great
feature. You can select text box backgrounds, and even the color of your
text! The magic types can be reorganized, too. Use Cure and Life magic a
lot, and you can rearrange things by priority. If you prefer items to do
the healing, you can do that too. It's not easy for a beginner to make a
mistake with the controls, but they can easily make a strategy mistake.
(HINT: Be sure to check out the first building you see after Locke joins
you in Narshe!)

Overall 10 out of 10
Running out of time. Incredible game. Nuff' said. This game is highly
replayable and has great graphics and sound, harnessing Mode 7! And
it's FUN. That's the key. FUN. Squaresoft worked hard on this. Great job,
Square, and good luck in the future.

ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ
ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ
ŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻŻ

EB Funnies
-=Written By: PoliceN64@aol.com\\=-

GREEN JELLO

At The Parkinglot:

Man: (Looking at Pokey) Hey kid! I'll sale you this this ticket for 55 dollars!
Pokey: 55 dollars?!? God!!! That's a lot of money!
Man: (Holding the ticket out) It's a Yankees game ticket!
Pokey: Hmmm....Isn't what you're doing illegle?
Man: If you buy them from the ticket booths, they'll rip you off!
Pokey: Well...
Man: Hurry up, kid!
Pokey: Alright! (Hands the man the money)
Man: (Gives Pokey the tickets and starts to run) So long! Sucker!!!

Outside The Stadium:

Pokey: I can't believe I got a baseball ticket SO cheap!
::Pokey walks past a sign that says, "Baseball Tickets: 15 Dollars"::
Pokey: (Stops and looks at the sign) What the?!? GOSH DANGIT!!!

A Little Later:

Pokey: (Waiting in line to get in)
::The line moves up::
Ticket Man1: May I see your ticket, sir?
Pokey: Sure, (Hands the man the ticket)
Ticket Man1: (Looks at the ticket) Umm..sir...
Pokey: Yes?
Ticket Man: This ticket isn't real.
Pokey: Huh?!?
Ticket Man1: I better go show it to the manager.
::The man walks off really fast with Pokey's ticket::
(A few seconds pass)
Ticket Man2: (Walks up) May I help you sir?
Pokey: Agh, yes! Where's that other ticket guy?
Ticket Man2: What other ticket guy?

At The Ticket Booth:

Pokey: I'd like to purchase one ticket, please.
Clerk: That will be...15 dollars.
Pokey: (Slaps 15 dollars down) Take it before I change my mind!
Clerk: (Gives Pokey a ticket) Thank you, and have a nice day!
Pokey: Shetup... (Walks away)

Later, Inside The Stadium:

Salesman: Hotdogs! Right here! Get your hotdogs!
Pokey: I'll take one! (Hands the salesman a dollar)
Salesman: (Tosses a hotdog toward Pokey) Here you go!
::The hotdog lands on the ground::
Salesman: (Walks away)
Pokey: DANGIT!!!!!!!

Meanwhile, In The Middle Of The Field:

Umpire: You're one player short!!!
Yankee's Coach: One player?!
Umpire: Yeah!! Which means the other team wins unless you find one more player!
Yankee's Coach: Where am I going to find another player?
::The coach looks around and notices Pokey::
Yankee's Coach: Hey you!!!
Pokey: Me?!
Yankee's Coach: Yeah you!!! Get your butt down here!

Five Minutes Later:

Pokey: (Runs up) Yes?!
Yankee's Coach: You play baseball?
Pokey: Well n-
Yankee's Coach: Good! Now get out there and lets play some baseball!!!
Pokey: But-

At The Bench:

Yankee's Coach: (Walks up) Pokey, it's you're turn to bat! Get over to the batters plate!
Pokey: The batter's plate?! Is there food there?
Yankee's Coach: No time for questions!!!
Pokey: Yes sir! (Grabs a bat and runs up to the plate)
(A Few Seconds Pass)
Pokey: (Looking down at the plate) Hey, where's the food?!
::The pitcher throws the ball::
Pokey: (Looks at the coach) What now??
*SMACK!!!

Meanwhile, At The Food Store:

Clerk: May I help you?
Ness: How much are your hamburgers?
Clerk: 14 dollars!
Ness: 14 dollars for a hamburger?!
Clerk: Yep!
Ness: I think I'll just go to McDonalds and get one for 99 cents.
Clerk: (Pointing at Ness) Bwahahahah!!! You think you can get a hamburger for 99 cents? Bwahahaha!!!
::The manager walks out::
Manager: What's so funny?
Clerk: This kid thinks he can get a hamburger for 99 cents!
Manager: Bwahahahaha!!! 99 cents! Hahahah!!!
Ness: Fine, then I'll leave! (Walks out of the store angrily)

Later, At Home:

Mom: Oh, hello Ness! How was your d-
Ness: Don't ask!
Mom: It sounds like you had a rough one. Why don't you eat some steak and go to bed?
Ness: FOR THE HUNDRETH TIME! I HATE STEAK, AND HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GO TO BED WHEN IT'S 3:00 PM?!?
Tracy: Hello, Ness! Would you like me to take something of yours and store it?
Ness: DANGIT!!! Stay away from my stuff!!!
Tracy: Alright, I'll send someone right over!
Ness: (To himself) Why is everyone acting so wierd today?! It's like I'm in the Twilight Zone!
::Ness wakes up::
Ness: *sigh* It was only a dream...
Ness's Mom: Ness, come eat your waffles!
Ness: Alright Mother!!!
::Ness get dressed and sits down at the table::
Ness: (Looks at his plate) What's wrong with my waffles?
Ness's Mom: Well, the waffle iron broke so I had to use a real iron.
Ness: No wonder my waffles are burnt!
Tracy: (Watching TV) Ness, you gotta come see this!
Ness: (Runs up to the TV) What? What's on?
News Broadcaster: Well, it looks like a baseball player got hit in the head last night with a baseball. Here is the video we caught on tape.
-------------------
Pokey: Where's the food?
*SMACK!!!
-------------------
News Broadcaster: And there it is!
Ness: What the?! Was that Pokey?!!
Tracy: Oh my God! I think it was!

Meanwhile, At The Hospital:

Pokey: (Pushing a butten that makes a buzzing sound) Get me my Jello!!!
::The nurse runs into the room::
Nurse1: (Hands Pokey the jello) Here!!!
Pokey: Dangit! Where's the spoon?! I'm not eating this with my fingers!
Nurse1: (Runs out of the room and brings back a spoon) Here you are.
Pokey: Finally! (Takes a bite of the jello) What the?!? (Spits the jello out all over the floor)
Nurse1: What now?!!!!
Pokey: This is green jello, dangit!!! I'm here to get better and you're trying to poisen me!
Nurse: AGGGGGGHHHH!!!!!! I quit! (Runs out of the room crying)
Pokey: Come back here! I want my jello!!!!!!!

Meanwhile, In The Hospital Lobby:

Ness: Hmm...maby I should get Pokey a get well present.
Nurse: (Runs past Ness) AGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
::Ness walks up to the hospital gift shop::
Ness: Perfect!
::Ness looks around till he notices a tought bag with a picture of Gumby's horse friend, "Pokey"::
Ness: Heh, he'll like this!
::Ness walks up to the counter::
Clerk: May I help you?
Ness: Yeah, I'll take this bag.
Clerk: Security!!!
Ness: What?! What did I say?
Clerk: You said you were going to take that bag! That's called shop lifting! Security!!!
Security Guard: (Runs up) Yes?
Clerk: This boy was going to-
Ness: No I wasn't! I was going to buy it! Okay?!
Clerk: Well, alright....I'll let you go... That will be...6 dollars in total!
Ness: (Hands the clerk the money) Here.
Clerk: Would you like a bag for your bag?
Ness: What?!

Meanwhile, In Room 101:

Pokey: (Pressing the buzzer) Docter!!!
Docter: (Runs into the room) WILL YOU SHETUP?!?!?!?
Pokey: Give me my jello!
Docter: SHETUP! SHETUP! SHETUP!
Pokey: (Rapidly pressing the buzzer) JEEEEELLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Docter: I'll show you!!!
Norman: (Covered in bandages like a mummie and laying in bed) Mmmf! Mmmmf!
::The docter takes Norman's chart and puts it in Pokey's box::
Pokey: What the?!

Five Minutes Later:

::A young nurse walks into the room and picks up Pokey's chart::
Young Nurse: Oh, so you're Norman! It's time for your kidney surgery!
Pokey: Kidney surgery!?! Who's Norman?!
Young Nurse: Now, now. I know you're a little nervous, but it will be over before you know it!
Pokey: NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
::The docters walk in::
Docter1: Lets take him to the operating room!
Docter2: Yes, sir!
Pokey: AGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
::The docters take Pokey out of the room::

A While Later:

Ness: (Walks into room 101) Pokey?! Is that you?
Norman: Mmmf! Mmmf!
Ness: Oh my God! You were hurt worse than I thought!
Norman: Mmmmmfff!!!
Ness: (Holds the tought bag up into the air) Look what I got you! A tought bag with a picture of Gumby's friend, "Pokey!" Heh, he kinda looks like you!
Norman: MMMMMMMFFFFFFFF!!!
Pokey: (Faintly heard) No!!! Please!!! NO!!!! AGGGGGGGGHHH!!!
Docter1: (Faintly) I thought I tould you to give him the knockout gas before we started the operation!!!
Docter2: (Faintly) Opps, my mistake!
Ness: (Looks at Norman) There are sure a lot of nutts around here!

Meanwhile:

Pokey: (Running down the hall) AGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Docter1: He got away!
Docter2: Security! Release the dogs!
::Pokey runs past the room Ness is in::
Ness: Huh?! Was that? No! It couldn't be!
::Pokey runs till he comes to a door that says, "Docter's Lounge"::
Pokey: (Looks back and sees that he is being chased by dogs)
Dog1: Rough!!! Rough!!! GRRRRR!!!
::Pokey steps into the Docter's Lounge and slams the door shut::
Docter3: Hello! Are you new here?
Pokey: Well, umm...Yes! I'm docter Duggle Houser!
Docter3: Your awlfly young to be a docter.
Pokey: That's what they say!..... Hey, do you think you can get me one of those lab coats?
Docter3: Sure, you can have mine! (Takes off his jacket and hands it to Pokey)
Pokey: Thank you! (Puts on the jacket)
::Pokey walks out of the room::
Pokey: Heh, they'll never catch me now!
Nurse2: Docter Sherman!!! Your needed in operating room 314!
Pokey: Docter Sherman??? (Looks at the name tag on his shirt) Oh, yes, Docter Sherman!
Nurse2: If you would just follow me.

3 Minutes Later, In The Operating Room:

Nurse2: This patient needs heart surgery.
Pokey: WHAT?!? HEART SURGERY?!?
Nurse2: You did study this for 7 years in college right?
Pokey: Well...um..Yes!
Nurse2: Alright! (Walks out of the room)
Assistant: (Hands Pokey a knife)
Pokey: (Looks at the person laying down on the table) *GULP*

Meanwhile, In Room 101:

Ness: So, I better get going now! C-ya Pokey!
Norman: Mmmf! Mmmf!
Ness: (Walks out of the room)
Pokey: (Runs by screaming) AGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!
Docter2: There he is!
Docter1: (To the dogs) Sick 'em!
Ness: Pokey?! (Looks back at Norman) What the?!
::Pokey runs into an elevator::
(The elevator doors shut)
Pokey: Awww...finally! Peice and quiet!

Meanwhile, From The Security Office:

Docter2: (Runs into the room) Shut that elevator down!!!
Security Guard: Yes, sir!
::The guard presses a red butten::

Meanwhile, In The Elevator:

Pokey: ...
::The elevator stops::
*SCREECH!!!
Pokey: What the?!
Docter1: (Banging on the door, from the outside) Open up in there!!!
Pokey: No!
Docter1: (Looks around and notices an emergency axe in a glass case) That's it! (Takes out the axe)
::The docter starts knocking dents in the elevator doors with the axe::
Docter1: Hahahahah!!!
Pokey: AAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!
Docter1: (Knocks a hole in the metal doors) (Sticks his head through it and looks at Pokey) Here's Johnie!!!
Pokey: ::Uses the docters head as a boost to get out through the top of the elevator::
Docter: Owe!!!
Pokey: (From on top of the elevator) Hah!!! I'm invincable!!!
::The wires snap from Pokey's wieght::
*CHING *CHING
Pokey: What the?!
::The elevator drops::
Pokey: AAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Meanwhile, In The Security Office:

Docter2: Quick! Hit the emergency breaks!!!
Security Guard: (Hits a button)

Meanwhile:

Pokey: AGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!
*Screech!!!
::The elevator stops::
Pokey: *gasp* I'm alive!!! (Jumps into the elevator and walks out the two metal doors)
::Pokey notices that the main entrance is 100 yards away from him::
Pokey: I'm free!!! (Runs toward the entrance)
Security Guard: (Blocking the way) Not so fast!
Pokey: Huh?!
Security Guard: Please return to your room, Norman! There's no escape!
Pokey: (Runs around the guard and sprints out the front doors)
Security Guard: What the?! Come back here!!!
Pokey: (Gets into an ambulance and drives away)

Meanwhile, At Dunkin Donuts:

Chief Strong: I'll have that jelly filled one with spreckles!
Lady: (Puts the donut in a bag and hands it to Chief Strong)
::An ambulance speeding 140 miles per hour zooms by::
Chief Strong: What the?! (Runs outside)
Police Man1: I think that was the stollen ambulance that was reported!!!
Chief Strong: (Gets into his Police car and follows the ambulance)
Pokey: (Looking back) Oh no!!!
Chief Strong: (Sticking his head out the window and yelling) Pull over your vehicle!!!
Pokey: What?! I can't hear you!
Chief Strong: (Sticking his head out the window and yelling) I said, pull over your- *Smack!!!
::Chief Strong gets hit in the head with a tree branch::
Chief Strong: AAGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!
Pokey: (Looking back) Bwahahahah!!! (Looks forword) NNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!

Meanwhile, In Berglin Park:

Jeff: I don't know...A pair of contact lenses for a smelly sock?
Mr.T: That's a great deal!
Jeff: Hmmmmm...Well....
::An ambulance crashes through the fence and hits a tree::
*BOOM!!!
::Cheif Strong pulls up and gets out of his police car::
Chief Strong: Hah! Gotcha!!!
Pokey: (Gets out of the ambulance) Oh no!!!
Jeff: (Takes the smelly sock from Mr.T and throws it to Pokey) Here! Use this!
Pokey: What the?! *sniff* *sniff* (faints)
Cheif Strong: Thanks kid! (Walks up to Pokey and puts a pair of handcuffs on him)

If you have any comments about this fanfic then e-mail: PoliceN64@aol.com


_________________________________________

The EarthBound Gang Newsletter
Issue 100
Monday, August 09, 1999
EBGNess
The EarthBound Gang