© Copyright 2001 by Meag Brorman
Chapter Five
“Mind if I join you?”
Lexa had just pulled her lunch out of her desk when Cameron walked into the front office. He had been alternating between friendly and distant for the past month. Apparently he was in a friendly mood.
“No, go ahead. Some company would be nice.” Lexa smiled at him sweetly as he sat in a chair across the desk from her.
Cam’s breath caught in his throat. She was so beautiful. Not only on the outside, but on the inside too. No matter what he told her, no matter what his mood, she was kind to him. And not only him, but to everybody. He didn’t deserve to even have a chance with her, but he was going to try.
His conversation with Brian had gotten him thinking. He couldn’t ever mislead Lexa, but he could try to understand her point-of-view. He had always tuned out Sarah when she talked about religion. No, religion was the wrong word. Sarah called it faith, a way of life. Cam didn’t think he needed it though. He was doing fine without God. He didn’t deny God’s existence, he just felt that he was fine on his own. No one to worry about but himself. Sarah had been the same way until she met Matthew Collins, her fiancé. Now she was different. Cam didn’t like change. He’d do anything for Lexa though.
The silence was awkward. Lexa wondered yet again if everything was all right with her boss. Cam pointed to the Bible Lexa had been reading out of before lunch.
“Is that interesting?” he asked.
“I think so.” Lexa didn’t say more. She was afraid of scaring him away. Sarah had said that she’d tried for years to convert her brother with no success. Lexa thought it wise to let him make the first move.
“What were you reading about today?”
Lexa was taken aback. Never had Mr. Burke once asked her or Sarah about their faith. She thought it better to tread lightly.
“I was reading from my favorite book, the book of James.” He looked genuinely interested so she continued. “James was a man who became a prominent Christian after Jesus died. You know who Jesus was, right?” He nodded and she went on. “He wrote letters to the Christians in the Greco-Roman area. The passage I read about
today warned Christians to be doers of the word and not hearers only,” she said, quoting James 1:22.
“So what does James say about being doers of the word?” asked Cameron.
Lexa looked at him. He wasn’t mocking her. He really wanted to know. She smiled at him.
“He warns Christians that if they think they are religious and do not bridle their tongues but deceive their hearts, their religion is in vain,” she replied, paraphrasing James 1:26.
“And you believe this also?” Cam questioned.
“Oh yes with all my heart.”
“Tell me more.”
Lexa complied. They talked through the lunch hour and only stopped when the phone rang. She was surprised with what he already knew. Sarah would be happy to hear that he had listened to all his sister had to say, even if he didn’t show interest.
Cameron Burke was smart. He’d posed questions she’d never even thought about. It was nice to put her theological knowledge to the test. This had been one of the best days she’d had in a while, and certainly the best time she’d had with her boss in the eight months they’d worked together. She then prayed that his curiosity would continue and that she would be able to answer all of his questions.
Cameron hung up the phone and went back to his lunch-time conversation with Lexa. He’d gone into the conversation wanting, no, needing to know her point-of-view on the subject of God and faith. That was the only way to push toward a relationship with Lexa. He’d thought it would be boring, but he was shocked to find out that he’d enjoyed it very much. And by watching the myriad of expressions on Lexa’s face when she talked about her faith, he knew she had enjoyed the conversation too. The joy lit up her face and made
her even more beautiful, fi that were possible. He knew that he would have to totally commit to her faith if he ever wanted a chance at a relationship with her. He wondered for the first time if that might be easier than he’d originally thought.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“And he actually listens to you? Amazing! That stinker never listened to a word I said.” Sarah sat on Lexa’s sofa one Saturday evening.
“Apparently he has, Sarah,” Lexa replied as she sat down next to her friend. “You wouldn’t believe how much he knows about the Bible. He listens, Sarah. He really does.”
“Well I’m glad to hear that. Maybe my time and effort hasn’t been a waste,” Sarah stated in a wondering voice.
The two women had gotten together to discuss Sarah’s wedding plans. The date was swiftly approaching and Lexa was a bride’s maid. Somehow, Lexa wasn’t exactly sure how, the topic had turned to her boss and their daily theological conversations. Cameron had come faithfully every day for the last two weeks. Lexa was somewhat amazed but at the same time very delighted. Cam kept on asking excellent questions and Lexa tried to give the best answers she could. And if she didn’t know the answer she’d look it up. She
was seeing a new side of her boss that she’d never imagined was there. She broke from her contemplation as Sarah began to talk again.
“I would ask myself why he’s had such a change of heart, but that would be redundant wouldn’t it?” Sarah winked slyly at Lexa.
“What do you mean? I’ve been puzzling it for weeks and have yet to come up with an answer,” Lexa replied.
“Ha ha. Quit trying to play innocent.”
“No, really. I have no idea what you’re talking about!”
“Come on,” Sarah replied, completely exasperated. You had to have noticed things. The way he looks at you, or the way he treats you differently than others. He’s more possessive of you. I think it’s kind of cute,” she said with a smile.
Lexa stared at Sarah as if she’d just grown another head. “Oh my gosh.”
“You really didn’t know?” Sarah asked incredulously.
Lexa covered her mouth with her hand and shook her head. “How long?” she managed to croak out.
“At least two months, if not more. I though you knew.” Sarah went on in a distressed voice. “I’m so sorry! I just ran off with my big mouth like always, not even stopping to think. Can you ever forgive me?” Sarah was distraught.
“Of course I can. It wasn’t your fault,” Lexa soothed.
“But I shouldn’t have—“
“Forget it. All is forgiven. I just never knew, that’s all.” She continued, half to herself. “I was stupid not to see it though. Thinking back, all the signs were there.”
Lexa bent over and put her head in her hands. Cameron was…in love with her. This was unbelievable. How could this have happened? He was her boss and friend.
“Umm, should I…”
“No Sarah, you’re not going anywhere! Look,” Lexa put her hand to her forehead and tried to get her thoughts straight. “Let’s not worry about this for now. I’ll work things out on my own later.”
“You sure?”
Lexa smiled at her friend looking anything but sure. “Positive. Now, have you picked up your wedding dress yet?”
Later that night, Lexa lay in bed, unable to sleep. Finally she got up and wandered into the kitchen for a glass of water. She drained her glass and sighed. What was she supposed to do now? There was no way she could show up at work on Monday and act normal. It wasn’t possible. She was glad Sarah had told her, but at the same time wished she had never heard it. God, she prayed, what do I do? I’m so confused. I like Mr. Burke, but I don’t know him well enough to say whether I love him or not. You’ve known him for eight months. Yeah, but I don’t know him like I’m coming to
know him now. He’s changing, for the better I might add. Help me, Lord, to know what to do. Have faith. Get to know him.
Lexa felt more at peace. She went to sleep looking forward to a Sunday of church and relaxation.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Lexa was reading the Sunday’s readings before church when someone sat down on the seat beside her. She scooted over without looking over. The 10:30 Mass was often crowded and she was used to sharing her pew.
“Mind if I sit here?”
Lexa jerked at the voice in her ear. She looked up into the brown eyes so dark that they were almost black. Cameron.
She gulped and tried to say good morning but the words caught in her throat. Cameron grinned and winked.
“I’ll take that as a yes,” he whispered to her.
Lexa smiled faintly and looked back down. What was Cameron doing at Mass? As much as he obviously enjoyed their talks, he’d never once expressed interest in attending Mass. And did he choose her church? He didn’t live near here.
The opening song began to play and Lexa went on auto-pilot. She was too aware of the man sitting next to her to pay attention to Father Simon. Why had she never noticed how engaging hi smile was? Or how black his hair was, much like his sister’s. Or how his teeth stood out white against his smooth, olive complexion when he smiled. How would she make it through Mass?
Cameron smiled to himself. The look on Lexa’s face when she saw that it was him sitting next to her was priceless. Sarah had called, bawling, late last night. She told him of their conversation and begged for his forgiveness. Poor Sarah. She’d be okay though. Matt was coming up for a few days and she’d be right as rain before long. When he’d found out that Lexa knew his feelings for her, he realized that it was time to take the next step. He’d been deliberating on whether or not to attend Mass and last night’s call from Sarah made the decision for him. To him, going to church signified that
he was ready to commit himself to God. He knew enough from Sarah and Lexa to make that decision, he was just putting off making it. It was quite a step to go from trusting only yourself with your life to trusting God, someone unable to be seen, touched, or heard, with your life. He was willing to try though for Lexa. Cam concentrated on what the priest was saying.
Lexa started when she realized church was over. She had not heard a single word the priest had said. She prayed God would forgive her and stood up. Cameron was waiting in the aisle for her. She genuflected and they left the sanctuary together. As they stepped out into the bright October sunshine, Lexa glanced up at Cam.
“Lunch?” he asked.
She nodded. “I didn’t bring my car…”
“No prob. We’ll take mine.” He grabbed her hand. “This way.”
Lexa tried to pull away from his grasp but he just tightened his hold. “Where would you like to eat?” he asked as he held open her door for her.
“Umm, anywhere is fine,” she said faintly.
“Papadeaux?”
She nodded her consent. He called in a reservation to assure them a table within an hour. The after-church rush was atrocious. The car ride was silent all the way to the restaurant. Each was busy with his or her own thoughts.
Lexa was wondering about the change in Cameron’s behavior toward her. Cam was trying to figure out what he would say to her. She needed an explanation, he could see the questions in her eyes.
Once they were seated, Lexa just stared at Cameron. She still didn’t know what to say to him. She felt awkward, knowing his feelings toward her. Cam finally started the conversation.
“First off, I’d like to say that you look very lovely today. That color sets off your eyes perfectly.”
Startled, Lexa thanked him. Cam had never commented on her appearance in the whole time she’d known him.
Cam hesitated. “Sarah called me after she got home last night.”
Lexa’s face turned a dull red and she fiddled with her water glass. Just then their waiter appeared, saving her from having to respond. They waited until he was gone before continuing their conversation.
“I don’t mean to embarrass you, but we need to talk about it.”
Before Lexa could say a word, the waiter returned.
“I’m sorry sir, did you say you wanted ranch on that salad?”
“Yes, that’s right,” Cam replied impatiently.
“Got it.”
Cameron sighed. “Maybe this was a bad idea. A restaurant is a terrible place to have a serious conversation.”
“No! Go ahead. You’re right, we need to talk about it. The sooner the better,” Lexa replied nervously.
“Okay then.” Cam paused to collect his thoughts. “Sarah told me all about your conversation last night. But even though you know my feelings for you, I want you to hear them from me. I love you Alexandra Campbell. I have for some time now.” He held up his hand before she could interject. “I know you probably don’t have the same feelings for me and our work relationship hinders things, but I’m willing to wait. I also realize you won’t date a non-Christian. I’ve read 2 Corinthians, and about every other book in the New Testament,” he added. “I’m still wary about making a final commitment to trust God with my whole life, but if your willing to wait for me…”
“You can’t base your faith on wanting to please me or anyone else,” Lexa cut in.
“I’ll admit that’s how it started. I knew the only way to get close to you was to understand your beliefs. But my perspective is changing now. Like I said, I’ve been reading the Bible and watching how you and Sarah live your faith every day. And I really enjoyed Mass this morning. Fr. Simon knows how to explain things well. I’m almost there, I can feel it. I’m just having a little trouble with giving up control of my life. It’s a big step for me. This is a lifetime commitment.”
“So is marriage,” added Lexa. When she realized what she’d said, she put her hand to her mouth.
Cameron quirked an eyebrow. “So it is.”
“How could we make it work? We work together.”
“People have done it before. It’s easier since you’re my only employee. We don’t have to worry about my playing favorites.” He winked at her. “So, are you up to the challenge?”
“But…” she was weakening. He was very persuasive when he smiled at her like that. Besides, she did like him. Why not try to see if there could be more?
“Come on Lexi, you know you want to.” She giggled. He looked
like a little boy trying to persuade his friends that his idea was the best.
“Let’s take it one day at a time and see how things go,” she said finally.
“You mean it?” He grabbed her hand and squeezed it. “You won’t be disappointed. I promise.”
Cameron smiled. He was so happy he could have kissed her, but he refrained. One day at a time buddy. One day at a time.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“Aaahh! You did it? You actually said yes?”
Lexa held the phone away from her ear as Mandie screamed. Lexa chuckled as she listened to her friend babble on. She’d known exactly what Mandie’s reaction would be when she called her. It was the exact same reaction Sarah had when she’d heard the news. From the way they reacted, one would have thought she’d just gotten engaged. I guess this just means that I have friends who care she thought.
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