"Gross...I just realized that school is on campus!" -Deanna
"Actually, to tell you the truth, I don't follow the established order because that takes effort." -Richard
"You just want to hand him a tampon and say, 'get over it!'" -Teresa
"Please God, bless the bubble." -Gabriel
"If I can't enjoy sex when I'm 20, it's your fault." -Teresa
"Note to self: DO NOT WEAR BASKETBALL SHOES." -Chris R.
"I wanna know you when your boobs are saggy." -Kelley
"And without shame, she reaches for the Spaghettios." -Teresa
"We should buy it in bulk quantities." -Luisa
"I'm going to poke you in the butt with this fork." -Teresa
"I don't WANT to poop unto others...cuz I don't want them to poop unto me." -Kelley
"...you could have been talking about monkies having butt-sex up in Dempsey and I wouldn't have known it." -Lauren
"Watch out for that coconut!" -Teresa
"We'd be married now if I'd had just tilted!" -Billy
"Listen to him- AUGH!- He's my favorite master-bassist!" -Chad M.
"Stop using our toilet paper- we need it...(all four rolls of it)!" -Lauren
"I am the Dali Llama...right here." -Kelley
"You're a guru-hermit...people will take trips to Kelley like Muslims do to Mecca!" -Teresa
"One day WE will be having sex." -Teresa
"What's the point of having sex?...It's like plastic warfare." -Gabriel
"Why do people say, 'it scared the living sh*t out of me'? What kind of sh*t is living?" -Teresa
Geez, she's gone through more phases, um, than THE MOON." -Teresa
"How does one 'sieze' a day? Where are the handles?" -Jim P.
"A dime with moisture can do SO much." -Lauren
"Can you pass me that thing?...I just flicked you off." -Teresa
"You should have gotten in when the getting was good- with all that homosexual stuff." -Harry
"We need skinniness in our relationship!" -Kelley & Teresa
"I wonder if you can get a Wonderbra that's invisible so you can look like you have boobs when you're naked..." -Teresa
"You're being wooed with cough medicine." -Luisa
"Are people in Nudist colonies irrevocably adamant about their stand? I mean, what do they do when winter comes...fly south?" -Teresa
"I wonder if my mom's back from her funeral." -Teresa
"The purpose of the argument from the passage is to specify means by which the broader argument as it is a subject difficult to completely separate from the ways in which he arrives at his conclusion." -Luisa, from her Saint Augustine paper
"Children are so SPOILED nowadays...in my days, we had to LICK 'EM!" -Luisa, Teresa, & Lauren
"Mmm...I love lard...it's great fun." -Luisa
"Melissa, he (Harry) has 3% body fat!" -Teresa
"Harry gets around!" -Kevin W.
"Hey, David, can I have a date with Harry?" -Megan W.
"How about some Ravioli?" -Kevin W.
"Now I know why I have all that da*n cellulite on my a**...all those sandwiches." -Rebekah
"Hurry up...we've gotta get these hostages out of here!" -Matt V.
"I should feel bad about procrastinating, but its kind of like my religion." -Ben M.
"Sugarplum faaaairy- song!" -Lauren
"I like your ring...it looks like a tonsil!" -Deanna
"Don't say, 'uh oh' then reach into your pants." -Mandy M.
"That's like the neverending sentence fragment...I mean, I didn't write that bad when I was in first grade." -Luisa
"People smell bad." -Lauren
"I'll take Tiger's wood." -Jonathan
"I like ass." -Chad T.
"Who do you think you are?" -Lauren
"That's the only kind of tongue that I don't like." -Lauren
"The blanket is poly-retarded." -Chris C.
"I am what every girl wants." -Anonymous
"I need a guy who wears a bra, because I need support." -Kim V.
"I have to be the supreme boob person in a relationship." -Kim V.
"...salty avacado." -Lauren
"My tires are Hispanic." -Michael O.
"...and HE looks like a cigarette." -Lauren
"I'm at Waffle House and I'm going back to sleep." -Caroline
"Has anybody heard of art?" -Michael O.
"Hey Chad, how would YOU like to have pendulous breasts?" -Lauren
"Dave like founded the village because of all of the monkies and the damn turnip greens...noooo!" -Michael O.
"Kevin is our pizza-eating fount of knowledge." -Lauren
"No more 'piphanies right now." -Michael O.
"I dated a lesbian, let's not discuss this." -Michael O.
"You don't want to know that your president can't get it up." -Cleve
"...Oglethorpe University: We're not elitist, we're just better than you." -Matt P.
"My knees look like golf tees." -Kevin M.
"Let's not set the flame apoop." -Lauren
"Right on." -Doug
"Right on, right on." -Ian
"If I stand here long enough, Gene Kelly is going to come and dance with me." -Lauren
"These winter guys are cute." -April
"He looks like a bullet." -Lauren
"If you were in my mind, you would be having such a good time right now." -Ryan B.L.
"If you're gonna dance like it's your job, don't wear velcro pants." -Lauren
"The sleep is almost breathed out of me." -April
"I love dancing on elevated surfaces...it makes me so happy." -Riz
"I think he'd like you more (if he knew that you farted)." -April
"Doritos smell the same-in or out." -Lauren
"I don't speak Asian." -Andrew Murphy
"Don't hold your breath while looking backwards." -Susan
"We want the hypothetical pizza." -Lauren
"I tried really hard on the floor. Then I couldn't walk for a week." -Caiti
"Who am I going to cuddle with? Cuddle with my imaginary boyfriend?" -Lauren
KEEP CHECKING BACK: NEW QUOTES ARE FREQUENT
"Somewhere between nothing short of amazing and 'oh my god, who's that guy?!!'" -Chris C.
