BAFFLE-GAB THESAURUS

As any self-respecting bureaucrat knows, it is bad form indeed to use a single, simple word when six or seven obfuscating ones will do.

But where is the Washington phrasemaker to turn if he is hung up for what Horace called "words a foot and a half long"? Simple. Just glance at the Systematic Buzz Phrase Projector, or S.B.P.P.

The S.B.P.P. has aptly obscure origins but appears to come from a Royal Canadian Air Force listing of fuzzy phrases. It was popularized in Washington by Philip Broughton, a U. S. Public Health Service official, who circulated it among civil servants and businessmen. A sort of mini-thesaurus of baffle-gab, it consists of a three-colum list of 30 overused but appropriately portentous words. Whenever a GS-14 or deputy assistant secretary needs an opaque phrase, he need only think of a three digit number-any one will do as well as the next-and select the corresponding "buzz words" from the three columns. For example, 257 produces Systematized logistical projection," which has the ring of absolute authority and means absolutely nothing.

Broughton's baffle-gab guide:

A 0) Integrated 1) Total 2) Systematized 3) Parallel 4) Functional 5) Responsive 6) Optional 7) Synchronized 8) Compatible 9) Balanced

B Management Organizational Monitored Reciprocal Digital Logistical Transitional Incremental Third-Generation Policy

C Options Flexibility Capability Mobility Programming Concept Time-Phase Projection Hardware Contingency

As this was originally written in 1968, you can see that it is by no means exhaustive, so feel free to ad as needed!