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Mud Fight

Mud Fight
Rated:  PG
Written by Jair - but inspired by Sharon (grin)


A perplexed Pathfinder re-reads the last line of her Chancellor's post for a third time.

---Chancellor Sharon wrote:
>       Now, did I answer those as and make it as clear as mud? <g>
>       Chancellor Sharon.

<Yep - the Chancellor did say "clear as mud".  Hmm - maybe all that Grigori Glow business has fried her brain some.> Jair thought with a grin.

Just to be certain though, Jair bounced off her chair and down the stairs to the Kitchen platform.  She paused for a moment to gape at Kronos actually doing the dishes, before decided that confirming her suspicions about the Chancellor was more important than giving Mr. End of Time crap about being domestic.  Jair jogged through the kitchen, down across the living room and down again through the entry landing, and then sprinted across the bridge and back into the cave.  She passed her hand over the light panel as she ran through the elevator, smiled at the Copper and scowled at Kronos' ill-tempered mount before skidding to a stop around the corner at the hot spring.

With a mischievous smile, Jair scooped up a hand full of wet sand from the edge of the hot spring.  Carefully, Jair inspected the goo from all angles, letting it dribble through her fingers as she held her hands up to the light.

"Nope, not clear at all!"  Jair giggled. "Still, to be fair, this isn't really mud.. it's sand.  I'll have to go down to check authentic mud."

"And who the hell are you talking to?"  Kronos asked quietly from behind her.

"Certainly not you." Jair snapped tartly as she bounced up and made to dart around him.

Kronos's arm shot grabbing Jair around the waist.  She wiggled trying to get free, but settled for kicking his shin hard enough to hurt her toes when she couldn't get free.

"Kick me again Cricket and I promise you will not get where ever it is you're in such a hurry to get to."  Even though Kronos didn't raise his voice, even though his mouth made a smile shape, Jair did not doubt the threat implied.  "Now, why don't you just humor me and tell me what has you so fired up."
"Okay - but it isn't my fault if it doesn't make sense."  Jair flashed him an impish grin.  "I need to go make mud."


"Mud... you know, water and dirt mixed together?  Mud."

"You are not making sense Cricket."

"I warned you." Jair said shaking her head, before scowling "And what is it with you and insects?  Not a very effective endearment if you ask me.  Still, I'll try one more time to make some sense."

"Mud is dirt and water, and all that is in this cave is sand, so ..." Jair said holding he hands before his confused face. "this can't be mud - thus my experiment is not conclusive. Still, I could perhaps use some more...  intimate data. "

Kronos saw the wicked glint flash through Jair's eyes, but he wasn't prepared for her next move.  Quick as a cat, Jair wiped her hands - sand-mud and all - across Kronos' face.  With a furious roar, Kronos reached up to wipe the goo from his face.

Released, Jair skipped happily past The End of Time, calling over her shoulder as she left, "So... can you actually see through that?"

Punching the button for the lift to take her down, Jair collapsed on the floor in a round of giggles.  Kronos wasn't going to be pleased about that little stunt.  But if she kept the lift at the bottom, she should be safe for a while.  At the bottom, Jair quickly found a log and jammed it in the lift door.  Dusting her hands off, Jair grinned as she glanced up.  The cave was so high above her that she couldn't hear him, but she was sure he must have been shouting curses at her.  With a triumphant smile, she turned and danced down to the river's edge.

Once there, she sat down, legs spread apart before her.  With great care, Jair set out to build a mud castle.  She dug the moat out first, scooping the canal that would connect the moat to the river.   Periodically, she stopped, holding a handful of the mud up to the sun.

<Nope, it's not "clear" down here either.> She grinned before going back to piling up mud in the center of her of her moat.  Jair was so engrossed in her task she didn't hear the lift going up, or coming back down.

One minute Jair was critically studying the mound of mud that was going to be her Castle Tower; the next, warm goo seemed to explode on top of her head, flooding her eyes and splashing her shoulders.  Jair gasped reflectively, pulling some of the grit into her mouth, only to start sputtering and spitting.

"I couldn't see through it, but perhaps you can, *Sweetheart*".

Jair froze mid-spit, the goo sliding down her back.  Somehow, Kronos had gotten down the lift.

"No.. I can't either." Jair said sweetly, turning her face blindly in the direction the voice came from. "But thank you so much for giving me this chance to confirm my findings.  Now, since you have blinded me, perhaps you could help me up?"  Jair held her hands out over her head.

"Why would I touch you when you all covered in that goo?"  Kronos said derisively, even as he grabbed hold of her wrists to pull her up.

Jair grinned evilly as she spun her but around and planted her feet in Kronos in stomach before heaving him up and over her head.  Jair heard someone else laugh as they walked away from the river, but chose to ignore it as she laughed at the satisfying "splash" Kronos made hitting the water.

<Oooh, I hope the water was deep enough.>  Jair thought suddenly realizing that he could have been seriously hurt if she had flipped him into a shallow part, or on to a rock.

"Kronos... Are you okay?" Jair whispered as she crawled, still half blind from the sand-mud, to the edge of the river.  The only sound she heard was the rushing water.  Jair scooped up a handful of water to wash the sand out of her eyes.  She blinked rapidly, and tried to see where Kronos might be.  Things were still not clear, and the sand was
scratching her eyes.

"Kronos.. say something you Oaf!"  Jair moaned as it occurred to her that she may have killed him, and he wasn't going to happy when he woke up.  She reached down for more water to wash her face, when hands gripped her neck and held her face under water.

In a panic, Jair kicked and bucked, clawing at the hands on her neck.  It was no use though; she was slowly pulled into the river.  Just when she thought she would drown, she was released.  Jair broke the surface, coughing and choking.

"I figured you must want a bath if you threw me in the river."  Kronos whispered in Jair's ear, swimming up behind her to hold her while she caught her breath.  "Before I finish your bath - would you care to explain yourself?"

"It was silly, and now we've ruined my castle."  Jair said with a sigh, for she had felt the castle squish when she vaulted Kronos into the river. "Sharon said something about making things 'clear as mud'.

Well, mud isn't clear, no matter how you make it.  I checked the sand, and the mud by the river."

"Jair," Kronos growled "You knew that all along.  What was the point of this."

"There wasn't a point" Jair pouted. "A silly mood came over me, and I decided to go play in the mud.  You got in the way... and the rest is history."

Kronos considered the woman before him.  Not may would throw mud at him and dump him in the river.

"Well, if it's mud you want, Cricket - then it's mud you'll get."

Kronos laid the woman out on the bank of the river, slowly pulling her clothes off as he scooped up handfuls of mud and rubbed them all over her breasts and stomach.  In slow circles, Kronos rubbed the mud, pinching and kneading until Jair was moaning.

(fade out to allow privacy - several hours later)

The pathfinder sat contently at her computer.  Quickly, she typed off a note to the Chancellor.

"Chancellor - after extensive research, I can only tell you conclusively that mud is NOT clear"

~ End of Mud Fight ~ BR> 

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