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~^~Resources & Reflections for Single Moms ~^~

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Well, I'm not a single mom anymore! I remarried on 1/31/03 to Randy, the single dad I mentioned below. So things have changed! But, my heart is still full for single moms, and I'm planning on keeping this page up ~ and updating it as I can! We just had a baby boy on 11/9/03, and and my nine year old daughter keeps me busy, too! I have a new job - (hopefully a career!) Creative Memories! So... if you want a catalog, or are interested in hosting a class(in the Atlanta area) - please email me @'ll keep posting good links and such as I find them for single moms - thanks for reading!

Getting to know you...
Which of the following best describes your single-mom status?

Current Results
"The Single Parent - A Christian Guide" by Viginia Watts Smith-1983,Power Books
"Discipline Without Shouting Or Spanking" by Jerry Wyckoff & Barbara C. Unell- 1984, Meadowbrook Press
"Single Moments" by Lynda Hunter-1997, Focus On The Family Publishing
"Single Parenting - A Wilderness Journey" by Robert G. Barnes,Jr.-1988,Tyndale

"Little Things, Long Remembered ~ Making Your Children Feel Special Every Day" by Susan Newwman - 1993, Crown Publishers, Inc.
"The Prayer of Jabez ~ Breaking through to the Blessed Life" by Bruce Wilkinson - 2000, Multnomah Publishers, Inc. The Prayer of Jabez
"The Power of a Praying Parent" by Stormie Omartian - 1995, Harvest House Publishers, Inc. (this book has made a huge difference for us. I learned how to pray for specific things I want for my daughter ~ Stormie really opened my eyes!) The Power of a Praying Parent
"Christian Parenting" by Betsy Dawn Inskeep Smylie - 1991, Upper Room Books.
"Beyond The Crocodiles - Reflections on Being Divorced and Being Christian" by Patricia Wilson - 1990, Upper Room Books.
"Who Put All These Cucumbers in My Garden?" by Patricia Wilson - 1984, Upper Room Books.
The church I work for received donated copies of the two Patricia Wilson books mentioned, and I have two copies of the Christian Parenting book. If you'd like one of these, and don't mind paying the postage for it, please email me. I'll be happy to send them out ~ they are wonderful resources for single parents!

Here are a few late additions I've found, and a link to Christian Book Distributors ~ Their prices are great! : ) (plus, shameless plug here, I'll earn a small commission on any books sold thru my site, and I could use some extra $$ !!)

The Financial Guide for the Single Parent

Successful Single Parenting

Parenting on Your Own

This week's First for Women (dated July 8, 2002) magazine features an article on Star Single Moms - like Jodie Foster and Calista Flockhart. There are some interesting items in the article:

The Changing Image of Single Moms

In a 2001 College Student Journal study of 248 unmarried students, 79 percent agreed "it is perfectly okay for a woman to raise a child without a husband". Researchers say that time has altered attitudes; marriage is no longer a prerequisite for having children, and having children is no longer a motivating force for getting married. In addition, the stereotypical profile of a single mom is no longer that of the poor young woman who becomes a parent because of carelessness, lack of judgement or desire for welfare. It's now of a mature woman who conciously chooses single parenthood.

"The rise of educated single moms"

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the percentage of MOMS - mothers outside of marriage - with college educations is growing dramatically. In 1982 2.7 % of unmarried mothers had college degrees. That rose to 6.0% in 1992, and today it's 12% of single moms!!

"Children reinvent your world for you" Susan Sarandon

"What do we live for, if it is not to make life less difficult for others" George Eliot

August 26, 2002

School is back in session, and with it the new routines and such of fall. I've been really busy with my writing, and also dating the wonderful single dad mentioned in my previous entry! Boy - does that present some challenges and such for a single mom who hasn't dated in eons! It's been an adjustment for me, but not so much for Katie. She and I have been fortunate to get to know this man and his children slowly, over the last year, as friends. So it does feel natural that we've progressed into being more than's a welcome change in our lives! :-) We've got some cool stuff to do in the next few weeks with my ACW job ~ the John Tesh concert, Amy Grant concert, Cagle's Dairy Corn Maze, Fernbank's two new IMAX movies, Burt's Pumpkin Patch, and more! Plus a trip to Savannah in October, which I'll be doing a travel and leisure review about! Cool! Life is really good for us. We're truly blessed! The only difficulty is in my "real" job. I just don't get any joy from it anymore. So I'm praying about it, and hoping the Lord will direct me where He wants me to go. I'm sad that I don't enjoy my job anymore, but I also think that means He has other places for me to go ! Well, off to bed I go for now! God Bless!

July 23, 2002

Well, only 3 weeks til school starts back. Wow - this summer has flown by!! Katie went to cheerleading camp and Komedy Kamp, and did a great job! We've been hanging out alot with a really nice friend - he's a single dad and has two sons, one is 10, one is a teenager. I really like being able to spend time with them! Katie loves having a friend to play with - our neighborhood is mostly seniors and singles, so there are not many kids here, and none her age. I'm really excited - I've got interviews lined up with John Tesh and Lisa Whelchel for I can't wait!! It is such an honor to be able to gain this incredible experience, which I hope will lead me to a full-time writing position! I've decided to self-publish my 2nd book - it's an internet guide for single moms, full of sites to help you organize your life, and utilize time spent on the internet. I hope to have it ready by Christmas. Of course, I'll keep you posted! Our online discussion group is growing! Last time I checked, we had 41 members. We're a pretty low-key group, but we share advice and concerns. We'd love for you to join us ~ add your email in the box at the top of the page to subscribe!! If you live in Atlanta, we visited a lovely place Friday ~ the Atlanta History Center on West Paces Ferry Road. Check it out - it's incredible!! Thought for the day: "Tradition is not just what we receive, it is what we create with our own hands and then hand over, the ties we make with past and future." ~ Marcia Falk

June 2, 2002

Summer is here and we are having a ball! Katie and I planted our garden - this year it's lima beans, lettuce, carrots, watermelon and lots of sunflowers, morning glories and other flowering beauties! School has been out for almost 2 weeks, and she is enjoying swimming lessons and summer camp at her daycare. In July she'll be going to a Comedy Camp for kids, she can't wait! She had her end of the year performance with her acting class, and I tell ya, the child is completely in her element! I would never have been able to get on stage in front of several hundred people, but it's not a problem for my daughter - she loves being "on"! I enjoyed teaching the classes at the scrapbook store, and I'm really starting to write alot for Some more features and my usual columns. I have been so fortunate to be able to work for them and review some fun places in Atlanta ~ this past month Katie and I saw a play, went to the Symphony, as well the High Museum of Art and SciTrek, plus the Renassiance Festival and Wild Adventures Theme Park in Valdosta. It is a perfect p/t job for a single mom, because I'm able to let my daughter experience some fantastic places, while sharing the experience with other families! It's a wonderful opportunity. I am very thankful that God blessed me with such a wonderful job. We are planning a trip to Charlotte later this summer, as well as a trip to Orlando to visit my dad and his great-aunt, possibly in September. Thought for the day: "Remember - try making the best of what you are. Do not complain if you do not have the right tools for living, but use well the tools you have. What you are, and wherever you find yourself is God's providential plan; it is God's doing. Take courage and live wisely b looking your disadvantages in the face to see what can be done with them." Pat Baker

May this summer be a blessed and relaxing one for all of us!

April 24, 2002

It's springtime in Atlanta ~ pollen is in the air!! : ) Thank goodness for my clarinex!! Katie broke her left arm and is in a cast. Oh joy! The 2nd broken bone this year. I'm pumping the child full of milk so she'll get stronger bones!! Let's see what else is new: We've cut the cable off at home, and boy, has that made a difference in our tv habit. (That's a good thing, I think!) In our county, kids will be out of school in less than a month. Hard to believe, isn't it? Another thing I'm really excited aboutis that next weekend, Katie and I head to the small town I'm from (in S. Georgia). I'm teaching two scrapbooking classes at my cousin's new store!! I'm really nervous, as I don't like public speaking, but hey - it's great experience! And we'll get out of town for a few days. I'm hoping to review a theme park down that way. (for my online column). That would be lots of fun for both of us! Though it seems I'm always struggling to get all the bills paid, God has given me several opportunities to make that possible. One is the teaching, plus my part-time job is picking up again as summer approaches. (The boss runs a golf summer camp for kids!) We go to get the cast off of Katie's arm Friday, and she's not going near anything with wheels for a long time !! Doesn't look like we'll take a real (long) vacation this summer, but I see a couple of potential weekend road trips. I'm just looking forward to a little down time!! Thought for the day: "No matter where we women live, we're all sisters in Christ. And we have a lot to offer each other - our time, our talents, our resources, our compassion, and our desire to make the world better." Ramona Cramer Tucker

God Bless you all! Kiss those babies, they are such blessings!

December 29, 2001 ~ The year is almost over, and what a year it's been. We've been blessed this year. My daughter is healthy and happy, I've got a good job, parttime job, friends, health,my family is nearby and we share alot together. We celebrated my Nana's 80th birthday, a cousin remarried this autumn, and I hope she is going to be happy again, my daughter is able to take acting and tap classes that she adores, and we have everything we *need*. God has been good. Of course, many in our nation are hurting this December, because they have lost a loved one in the insanity that plagued us on September 11th. That was truly the most shocking, horrendous day of my life. I'll never forget a moment of it. But good has come of it, as well: Look at the swell in patriotism that it revived, the love of country, the coming together of Democrats and Republicans as AMERICANS! The highest approval ratings ever for our wonderful president, George W. Bush. It's been a year to remember. We'll never forget the things we saw on 9/11, and we'll be telling that tale to our grandchildren, God willing. So take time to write down (in a journal, scrapbook, whatever) the things that made 2001 unforgettable for you. I pray that you all have had a wonderful holiday season, and that 2002 will be the best year yet! May God bless us all! Love and hugs, Aimee

November 11, 2001 Do you ever have days where you just feel like you failed as a parent? Today was that day for me. Katie and I have been fussing and fighting all day, and that is the worst feeling. She got on the phone with my sister and said she was going to live there!! (Keep in mind, she is a seven-year-old who has phenomenal tantrums these days!!) When I calmly said, "no, sweetie, you're not" she freaked out!! And I lost it and said "pack your bags, babe!" I was so angry. Felt betrayed I guess. I mean, she and I are a team - we go together and do everything together! So then, after a huge fit, she pulled a blanket and pillow out on the couch to sleep. I went out twice, and she was quite adament that she would stay there. I came in the bedroom and cried. It hurt! But, she came in a few minutes later and quietly said "I can't go to sleep without you, Mommy" and the dam broke - we both cried and hugged and promised to not fight like that again. It's been stressful here lately, money issues (as always), family dynamics with extended family members, my working several jobs, lack of sleep, etc. I hope it gets better. I did receive a wonderful email today. An article I submitted to a local Christian website was accepted, and they asked me to contribute regularly! Whoo hoo!! So things are looking up. Back to work now ~ can't believe Thanksgiving is next week! Where does the time go? Off to snuggle with my baby, then back to the grindstone....

May 6, 2001

We've just returned from the best vacation ever! A secluded beach near Mexico Beach on the gulf. It was truly a glimpse of heaven. How can you not walk away from a sunset at the beach and not praise God for the wonderous sights He made for us to enjoy! The salty air, the breeze coming off the ocean, the feel of sugary white sand between your toes. I love the beach! My little one enjoyed surfing on her boogie board, taking long walks with her cousins and me, looking for beautiful shells, spending quiet time each evening playing in the waves, and being a family. It doesn't matter how many are in your family. It matters that you are there for each other, and that you love and take care of one another. That was important for us to do ~ and we came home a better family because of it. It was more than I ever imagined it to be! I'm already daydreaming of next year's return to that incredible retreat! Sometimes you just have to get completely away from everything in your day-to-day life: the phones, voicemail, email and work. It took a good day or two to quit worrying about my inbox, who had called, and who might have emailed! I will admit to being tempted to pay for 15 minutes of internet access at the gas station, until my sister said - "can you believe someone would come down here, and then feel like they had to check email?!" That snapped me out of it right away! I got a lovely tan, so did Katie, and my outlook on work has gotten much better! So - that was a well spent week, and it will be repeated!! Take time for yourself, and you'll be better for it. If you don't take care of you, how can you take care of others???

April 8, 2001 ~ This year has flown by!! I can't believe we're 1/4 of the way through. As Katie gets older, the days seem shorter, the time I have to spend with her seems to be less and less. That is what makes single parenting so tough some days. You know how it is: Never have money for the extras I "want" her to have, so I've taken a second job to help pay off some high-interest credit card debt, and save towards a bigger place. I love having the extra money, yet at the same time, I resent having to work the second job. There have been nights lately when I ask God "Why?! Why did my ex do the things he did? Why am I always struggling financially? Why haven't I found "the one" for me? Why does my child have to miss out on having a dad here for her?" I know it seems petty and minor, but I have days where I yearn for the dreams of my childhood - being a mom, with a loving husband, 2.5 kids and the house in the country. Those dreams were never of me divorced, a single mom sharing a home with my mom again!! And, though He hasn't given me an answer for any of these questions yet, I have faith enough to believe that the things we go through make Katie and me stronger, better people. We will not ever depend on others to make us happy, we're be able to do it for ourselves. And when I get to feeling really low ~ it helps to remember this: Single moms are doing the work of two people: a mom & dad ~ so I think we are pretty amazing! We provide a home for our children, we feed and clothe them, we deal with the sickness, tantrums and other lows of parenting, handle ALL of the mundane household duties that two-parent homes get to divide between two people, and most importantly, we love, nurture and raise terrific children ~ and that is awesome!! I know that God gives me the strength, and through Him, I can do anything!! That gets me through anything! God Bless ~ Aim
If I hadn't had children, I probably would have had more money and material things. I probably would have gone more places, gotten more sleep and pampered myself more. My life would have been much more boring and predictable. As a result of being a parent, I have laughed harder, and cried more often. I have worried more and hurried more. I've had less sleep but somehow I've had more fun. I've learned more and grown more. My heart has ached harder, and I've love to a capacity beyond my imagination. I've given more of myself, but I've derived more meaning from life. ~Author Unknown~

Little girls are the nicest things that happen to people. They are born with a little bit of angel-shine about them and though it wears thin sometimes, there is always enough left to lasso your heart, even when they are sitting in the mud, or crying tempermental tears, or parading up the street in mother's best clothes.

A little girl can be sweeter (and badder) oftener than anyone else in the world. She can jitter around and stomp, and make funny noises that frazzle your nerves, yet just when you open your mouth, she stands there demure with that special look in her eyes. A girl is Innocence playing in the mud, Beauty standing on it's head, and Motherhood dragging a doll by the foot.

Girls are available in 5 colors - black, white, red, yellow or brown, yet Mother Nature always manages to select your favorite color when you place your order. They disprove the law of supply and demand - there are millions of little girls, but each is as precious as rubies. God borrows from many creatures to make a little girl. He uses the song of a bird, the squeal of a pig, the stubborness of a mule, the antics of a monkey, the spryness of a grasshopper, the curiosity of a cat, the speed of a gazelle, the slyness of a fox, the softness of a kitten, and to top it all off, He adds the myesterious mind of a woman.

A little girl likes new shoes, party dresses, small animals, first grade, noise makers, the girl next door, dolls, make believe, dancing lessons, ice cream, kitchens, coloring books, make-up, cans of water, going visiting, tea parties and one boy. She doesn't care so much for visitors, boys in general, large dogs, hand-me-downs, straight chairs, vegetables, snow suits, or staying in the front yard. She is loudest when you are thinking, prettiest when she has provoked you, the busiest at bedtime, the quietest when you want her to show off and the most flirtatious when she absolutely must not get the best of you again.

Who else can cause you more grief, joy, irritation, satisfaction, embarrassment and genuine delight than this combination of Eve, Salome, and Florence Nightengale? she can muss up your home, your hair and your dignity - spend your money, your time and your temper - then just when your patience is ready to crack, her sunshine peeks through and you've lost again.

Yes, she is a nerve-racking nuisance, just a noisy bundle of mischief. But when your dreams tumble down and the world is a mess - when it seems you are pretty much of a fool after all - she can make you a king (queen) again when she climbs on your knee and whispers, "I love you best of all!"

written by Alan Beck
My precious child, I have slipped into your room to sit with you as you sleep, and watch the rise and fall of your breath for a while. Your eyes are peacefully closed and your soft brown hair frames your cherubic face. Just moments ago as I sat with my work in the den, a mounting sadness came over me while I contemplated the day's events. I could no longer keep my attention on my work, and so I have come to talk to you, in the silence as you rest. In the morning I was impatient with you as you dawdled and dressed slowly, telling you to stop being such a slowpoke. I scolded you for misplacing your shoes and capped off breakfast with a disapproving look as you spilled food on your shirt. "Again?" I sighed, and shook my head. You just smiled at me and said "Bye Mama".

In the afternoon, I made calls while you played, singing aloud and gesturing to yourself, with all of your toys lined up in jovial rows on the bed. I motioned irritably for you to be quiet and stop all the racket, then spent another hour on the phone. It was quiet in your room.

In the evening, I worked at my desk, and you approached me hesitantly,"Will you read me a story tonight, mama?", you asked, with a glimmer of hope. "Not tonight" I said abruptly, "Your room is still a mess - how many times do I have to remind you?" You wandered off toward your room, head down. Before long, you were back, again! "Now what do you want?" I asked in an agitated tone of voice. You didn't say a word - you just bounced over, threw your arms around my neck and kissed me on the cheek. "Good night, mama, I love you" was all you said, as you squeezed tightly. And then as swiftly as you had appeared, you were gone.

After that, I sat with my eyes fixed on the desk, feeling a wave of remorse come over me. At what point did I lose the rhythm of the day, I wondered, and at what cost? You hadn't done anything to evoke my mood, you were just being a child - busy at the task of growing and learning. I got lost today in my adult world of responsibilites and demands, and had little energy left for you. You became my teacher today, with your unrestrained urge to rush in and kiss me goodnight, even after an arduous day of tip-toeing around my moods.

And now,as I see you lying fast asleep, I yearn for the day to start all over again. Tomorrow, I will treat myself with as much understanding as you have shown me today, so that I can be a real mom - offering a warm smile when you awaken, a word of encouragement after school, and an animated story before bed. I will laugh when you laugh, and cry when you cry. I will remind myself that you are a child,not a grownup, and I will enjoy being your mom. Your resilent spirit has touched me today, and so I come to you in this late hour to thank you, my child, my teacher and my friend, for the gift of your love.

~Author Unknown~
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