50. Use soap.
49. Don't kiss the dog.
48. Where are your shoes?
47. If I were a shoe, where would I be?
46. "Hay" is for horses.
45. What part of "no" do you not understand?
44. Tickle, tickle, tickle.
43. Tie your shoes.
42. All right, look sloppy. See if I care.
41. Don't sit so close. You'll ruin your eyes.
40. Your socks don't match.
39. It's on your left. No, your other left.
38. Why is the remote control all sticky?
37. When I was a girl, we didn't even have remote controls.
36. Turn that down. You'll wake the dead.
35. Hush. (Try that one on a co-worker sometime.)
34. Zip it. (Ditto.)
33. Blow on it. (Don't go there.)
32. Use your napkin.
31. Don't shovel your food.
30. Because it builds strong bones.
29. Three more bites.
28. Clean your room.
27. You call this clean?
26. Why do I have to do everything around here?
25. If I hear "Pickachu" one for time.
24. Stop talking and go to sleep.
23. If your brother jumped off a cliff...
22. Aw, get up. That didn't hurt.
21. I'll kiss it and make it better.
20. When I was your age...
19. I don't know. I haven't been wearing your shoes, now have I?
18. Close the door. Were you raised in a barn?
17. In or out, in or out. Make up your mind.
16. When you start paying the utility bills around here...
15. Stop slamming that door!
14. Money doesn't grow on trees.
13. By the time I count to three...
12. Walk faster.
11. Stop running!
10. Don't you run from me!
9. Don't put that in your mouth. You don't know where it's been.
8. Did you go?
7. Get down from there!
6. Somebody's gonna get hurt!
5. Put that down. You'll put your eye out.
4. This is my final warning...
3. What's that smell?
2. We'll see.
And the number one Thing That Only Parents Say is:
"Because I said so."
And the most FRIGHTFUL thing is when they use your FULL NAME. You are in BIG TIME TROUBLE!
You can also tell when a parent has multiple children. They start down the list of names till they finally get to
the name of the current delinquent. Sometimes, a parent will give up guessing the child's name and will say "You
Know Who I Mean!".
