Things I'll never understand
Somethings I don't understand....

-Why people stay with their abusive partners, If i had some one who made me cry all the time I'd be like 'Fuck you Buddy' I don't understand why some Women put up with this. My parents don't fight much, so maybe I'm one of the few who see this as strange. So like if you don't get along then just leave before it gets worse...right?

- I have this friend who is mad at me, because I think her boyfriend isn't good enough to breath the air she breaths. One day she'll see I was right and He really is an emo loser and she'll wish she still had me as a friend. This guy thinks all these people are his friends, i know of like six people who may actually be able to stand him. He thinks he's saitanic (however its spelt) He dresses all goth uses Fuck like every other word and had the nerve to call me a whore..... He only wishs he could be a man whore cuase he's dirty and ugly and can't play the guitar

- I have to friends that are having family issues....
- Her grandmother and "uncle figure" are mad at her because she found a new boyfriend. Because they worship the ground Billy walks on. I can understand Billy's being upset and a little sad. I don't understand how Your family can take your friends side... I mean for gods sake blood is thicker than water
- My friend dropped out of college and for good reason, better that she drops out now and gets a refund then to wait and loose the money right? Her paretns think her boyfriend made her... They took away her house and car keys and pretty much disowned her... Come on now...she's your daughter, You have to fogive these things....

- I don't see how a car accident 3 months past can get you out of so much. She says she wants to move on and yet she brings it up as an excuse constantly. Being that i was hurt 40 times worse and have already fully recovered with injurys that include a head injury i find that bullshit!!!! exuses for being a lazy fat slut thats what they are....

Takeing the time to read this means you have patience....
Mood:  caffeinated
Topic: Midday ramblings
Ok not to make you listen to the mid-after noon ramblings of one so crazy as I'm but you opened this...don't say I'm didn't warn you. Yesterday I'm started my new job. It was most pleasent...yes. Elliott, my good friend of 3 years is staying at my house till Friday because he has no where else to go. So he said he'd take me home when he got off work at 9. So naturally I'm get off at 4 and wander around downtown. I'm found a book that really kinda interests me. Partly because of the style its written in and partly because its almost as if it could be written by me or about me. I'm honestly have no idea where I'm'm going with this. I'm'm just kinda rambling on an on to get it out so I'm won't be rambling on and on in my head through my next class. Which I'm spent the last 20 mins thinking about skipping. The fact that I'm even consider skipping a class on my second day shows how much I'm hate math and how incredible engrossed I'm am with this book. Plus if I'm get into the habit of skipping classes this early in the semester I'm'll end up the exact same as a certain Loser who's name begins with a D and ends with a Y and drives an ugly white Scion and has a frizzy mop on his head.....(not to mention any names...)

The Vodka and Teddy Bears movie is almost done. I'm'm trying to break myself of this habit I'm had when I'm was younger...starting something and never finishing it. I'm was always the type of kid that would start coloring one picture and then midway through turn the page and start a new one. its part of the way the artistic mind works. Any way I'm want to start on a new video project. One that involves me actually writing a story, and casting the roles. One day my name will appear at the end credits of a big movie. Whether I'm'm behind the camera or in front of it. I'm'm going to be a big star one day and you'll see my name in lights.

I'm fell back in touch with Ashley B. Someone I'm knew from my first day at cape.... (ex- Ashley, Ashley, Jennie, Elliott, Chelsea....) It's funny how people grow apart and can somehow grow back together. She seems allot different now than before. Also another really great thing I'm noticed about College is people just kinda forget about all the nasty things they did to each other in high school. I'm ran into Krystal Clark today. All I'm remember is we didn't get along in high school. The car accident erased that and other parts of my memory but we're cool now no matter what happened.... this defiantly seems allot better than high school life.

It takes allot to make me mad. So I'm guess my guy friends feel the need to get mad for me. Lindsay and I'm aren't friends anymore. Who wants a backstabbing friend who doesn't give a rats bottom what happens to you? Exactly... I'm can't trust her so I'm don't want to hang out with her. I'm don't describe her as anything close to mature. I'm was injured far worse then her in the car accident. I'm had a head trauma that erased parts of my short term memory. I'm don't blame any of my actions on this accident. No car accident head trauma can make you into a Psychopathic Lier freak. Even those who are clinically insane know what they are doing, and can control their actions. Don't let the pretty face fool you.

I'm've often wondered if everything that happens to you effects the next thing, in a change. Like obviously you get run over by a tractor trailer you'll be in the hospital... You have unprotected sex, and chances are you'll wind up pregnant or with an STD. But what if leaving a certain job caused something else, if canceled plans with friends, would open up your time to other things like lets say... getting mugged while your walking home from the video store to prepare for you pathetic night alone.... Timing is everything. Like being at the wrong time at the wrong time. If you left somewhere early you could very well just be killing yourself. But also the columbine shooting. Had some of those 13 kids skipped school as I'm'm sure some had thought they might still be alive. So sometimes being responsible and doing the right thing signs your death certificate.

Not to be morbid or anything. But If I'm would have been hanging out with friends after graduation practice or Lindsay would have gone to school maybe the accident wouldn't have happened. Or if Karl wouldn't have missed the turn to his mothers house we could have made it home safe. You can't blame that accident on the alcohol or Karl entirely. Accidents happen even when alcohol isn't involved. Also its not like Karl meant to total his car or hurt/ nearly kill his best friends little sister.