Mood:  blue
Now Playing: Launchcast- Goin Under- Evanesence
Now I will tell you what I've done for you
50 thousand tears I've cried
Screaming, deceiving, and bleeding for you
And you still won't hear me
Don't want your hand this time, I'll save myself
Maybe I'll wake up for once
Not tormented...Daily defeated by you
Just when I thought I'd reached the bottom
I'm dying again...
I'm going under
Drowning in you
I'm falling forever
I've got to break through
I'm going under
Blurring and stirring the truth and the lies
So I don't know what's real and what's not
Always confusing the thoughts in my head
So I can't trust myself anymore
I'm dying again
So go on and scream
Scream at me
I'm so far away
I won't be broken again
I've got to breathe
I can't keep going under

Mood:  chillin'
Now Playing: Nothin.......Its peaceful LOL
Wow wuta week! Classes r kickin my @$$! I def need 2 up the studyin. But its not all about studyin. I just hafta invest more time. :-) Battle of the Sexes (BOTS) is gonna b so hot this season!!! OMGah I can 4c the mass drama now LOL But back 2 school..so 2morrow is da 11 clock dreaded art history class. Totally snooze. but Imma try 2 stay up all class 2morrow! lol But i guess I should get 2 sleep now i am sooooo sleep dprived LOL!!! O yeah this weekend was homecomin n they had 'build-a-tiger' so i was gonna make one. I went home on Thursday with plans 2 come back on Saturday but those plans got shot down n i would have 2 come back on Friday. So on Sat. I go down there n they're sold out!! So I just go 2 the union store n buy a tiger cub thats super soft! My friend Wes liked it n wanted it so like frinds do in real life I gave him the 'honor' of lettin it bear his name LMAO So hes lil Wes. I know ill take some pics on webcam n post em! Ok thats all for now. CIAO!!

Mood:  cool
Now Playing: Launchcast......I actually downloaded Yahoo messenger staydtru4u if u wanna hit me up
Appearantly I havent updated in a while..I could swore Id done it last week. Mo finally started a Xanga n shes tellin me i need 2 update more LMAO! So Imma try 2 take her advice. But I've made so many friends online. N i really feel close to some of em. Some r hella annoyin. But its the good with the bad. hopefully ill b gettin a webcam soon. If @ all possilbe it will b the new one i saw. But it may end up bein the poor quality alias one. How come her pics were so good :-( lol So yea im goin home on thursday comin back on sat. i wanna do the build a iger thin they're havin for homecomin. At least i can say i participated in something lol! But yea lovin the collegelife i just ned more ppl with my kinda schedule so i could go out more. Imma ask around n c if i can someone to got to the mall with me n actually sty for more than an hour!!!!!!!! I still dont know evrything that mall has to offer...oo the possibilities..lol hopefully ill b able to do some good shoppin friday nite! ull be the first 2 know.........well maybe the second lol

Mood:  blue
Now Playing: Yahoo media player
this entry is just about right now. Man do i feel bad. Have u ever wanted something so bad and u get it, only to have it snatched from ur hands or how u have friends that mean the world to u n try try to alwayz spend time with n all of a sudden they stop callin n comin around.......... thats how i feel right now. I think todays one of those days when im alone n lonely. Some slow songs came on the radio n i couldnt help but start cryin. and as much as i wanted to stop i couldnt. and i have to admitt, it felt good. There r some changes i need to make. I need to start lookin @ life differently. But right now i just hurt. So imma end here. I'll leave u with a poem i wrote in 11th grade that i thought of after id cried.

i just need time,
to sit n cry,
from all the pain im in.
For a lil healing,
Some time to think,
and forgiveness of my sins.
I just need time,
to be alone,
away from neone else.
Scared of the world,
on the inside a child,
searching for myself.
I need time to cry,
for everyone who,
wont cry for themselves.
Because they, too lost,
to even realize,
they are in need of help.
I want to be differnt,
set apart from the world,
so that i may be new.
And yet, everytime,
i see myself with you.
The time to cry,
to free myself,
of wut was left behind.
And through it all,
still i see u,
r all that i can find.
Time away from,
wut once was
together u n i.
Time away,
by myself,
to just sit and cry.

Mood:  cheeky
Now Playing: watchin Lord Of the Rings3...I know ur like WTF!
Ok theres no excuse for not updatin other than i was just bein lazy. So i didnt go to the concert. I think i mentioned that. So this week was pretty chil. I got a new friend in Design class. We totally mesh well! LOL so classes have been tough n im tryna study more n stuff since the quizzes n tests r comin up. So these last couple of days i decided to try somethin new. So I went to yahoo chats only i used a alter ego i guess u could call it. It was very successful n i got to talk to a lot of ppl but i decided to be myself today thanx to one of my friends. So yea today i stayed inside all day n chatted up a storm. and 2morrow im supposed to be goin shoppin. N i might get a webcam...for sum reason my public want to see me live. LOL speakin of live.........How bout live porn in your face Real World Philly Style!!! Thats right as i speak my roomie is tryna get his groove on. How Rude! Im not gonna say the funniest pt but if u read n ask i'll tell LMAO!!! So yea im tryna do whatever possible to not look @ them cause ewww!!!

Mood:  blue
Now Playing: Britney's My Prerogative
Ok so i did miss the concert only to find out monday my partner from Desgin WHO I TALKED TO would have loved to go to the concert!!! I dont know if she had a ride or not but o well. Nothin much been happenin lately Jus chilin n failin math again LOL

Now Playing: Kanye West- Through the Wire
WOW what a week! Ok Monday I went to the bank wit Regina n Jasmine. We were supposed to go to Target but we didn't have time. I was a lil late for class but the teach didn't mind. On Tuesday during break I went up to the comic shop and the mall with Laura n Maggie. That was fun. Later that nite when I went to Paws to grab some dinner n I ran into Talia! I finally got her number right. LOL She had a friend with her (Kree). So I had dinner with them n then we came back to my room. They looked @ all my pics n then we watched last weeks n this weeks episodes of Real World. We had sooo much fun. The phone was ringin off da hook so Talia was like let me answer it so I let her n she was like "Trevor's Sex Spot" It was tru hilarity!! It was this girl I had met the night before who is a good friend of my roommate. She was confused. So Talia n Kree left @ like 11:30. Wednesday was a pretty boring day nothin on tv. I wasn't even hungry either.O yeah except for the part where i won tickets to the Alicia Keys concert in B-more on Sat. Thursday was chill nothin excitin except my excitement about goin home. Friday slept most o the day n then went to Wal-Mart around 10 then to Granny's house. Sat came back to school. Here's the dilemmna of the day. How to get to the concert n who to go with. Regina cancelled last minute n erybody else either has plans or is home. So I might go to the movies with Mo n Jazz but I doubt it. Man I really wanted to go to that concert. Oh well. I guess it wasn't meant to be.

Mood:  on fire
Now Playing: Watchin BB5... I was when I started
Ok today was a pretty good day. Nothin much happened yesterday. I did go to the mall with Rick n some of his friends. Today was a diff story. Last night I had the room to myself n stayed up not too late but late nonetheless. So I woke up @ 12 and lollygaged around. I managed to go to the Union Store n get one of my pads. I decided that the bigger on can be gotten from some friend. And I have to get my lab book which costs $30. So I'm planning on goin to da bank 2morrow to get some money out for that. Also I'm going to hafta buy some new sheets cause not having ne sux butt! So later I talked to Laura n asked if she wanted to come over n watch a movie since we were both so bored n she decided we could do dinner too. So we had dinner and then rented Bruce Almighty which we have to finish because she had to leave becuase of the 'unexpected' arrival of some friends. So she left and I got to watch JLU @ 8:30...the exact time she left. Then @ 9 she immed me n said her friends wanted to meet me. So I met them outside TC. N Laura said they were gonna go walk around so I decided what te hey. N off we were. So we started off and made a pit stop @ Dunkin Doughnuts. From there we went to the Comic Book store and quickly left so that I would not spend all my [mom's] money. Which leads to the fact that I'm going to apply for a job @ the Union Store for some extra money. So after that we did some stuff that I will never mention to neone who I aint really tite wit. Nothing that bad just bad enough...completely LEGAL! So then we walked back home. I showed them my pics, n wallpeapers, n website, n then i said bye. So the nite's pretty much over. Don't know what will happen now. Nething juicy...u'll read about it 2morrow.

Mood:  party time!
Now Playing: Playin PS2 n watchin Jack@$$
Thursday was as usual a super boring day with me almost falling asleep in AH again. I took a different route to Stephens and i think I may have gotten there 3 minutes faster so I'll be taken that way more often. Or it may have been the severe lack of traffic. Then i came back to my room. Made my new Britney wallpaper. Then I went to physics which I almost fell asleep in cause he was hella boring. Came home watched the ring and did some comp work. Roomate Rick bought home a friend and we're playin PS2 and watchin movies.

Mood:  mischievious
Now Playing: Growin Up Gotti
Today was a pretty good day. I'm so happy theres only one more day of classes. On Friday I'm goin to the movies to see Resident Evil: Apocalypse. I even got some more peeps to tag along. Ok back to today...nothin really excitin. I had lunch with Laura after bein completely lost @ Newell cause it was my first time and I had no idea where I was. LOL but eventually I found it. I only ate a salad that was really good. I liked it. Then later I had dinner with my roommate Rick. I had this smoked n grilled chicken wit some rice and potatoes. I did my first picture since the end of high school and I'm pretty happy with the results. And then I did some math homework. And now I'm just chillin. I did another tanning....after Mo said i badly needed one. LOL and now Im about ta put on my Towson tattoo on my neck of course. hmm now right side or left side? Probably the right....