Chapter 2

Part 4

This morning I woke up in the cemetery. I wasn't really sure how I got there. Maybe it was from the phone call last night. I knew my parents died, but never knew how or why.

"Aunty? Are you here?", I yelled. But got no response. What happened last night?

I started to go back to my aunt's the car was there but I didn't see her anywhere. I ran in the front door. She wasn't in the living room, nor the kitchen.

"Aunty, where are you?", I yelled again. Just then I heard something.

"Honey? Is that you? I fell out of bed when I heard the door slam shut. I didn't know if it was you or the police. I was afraid that they had come and took you away when I didn't hear you. I called for you.", she said.

"I woke up in the cemetery. I don't know why or how but that's where I was. I must have been sleep walking again. I thought I hurt you when I couldn't find you.", I replied.

"No hun. I'm still here and alive. A little hurt from falling but alive. I don't think you could hurt me hun. It's in your head that I am a good person and someone you love.", she told me. I wasn't to sure about that though. If I could do it to my boyfriend, then I'm sure I could do it to her. I had to get help for me and fast. I don't want to hurt her or anyone else ever again.

"I think I may need to go to the doctors. I may have popped my hip out again. You stay here while I'm gone. I don't want to see you get arrested.", she told me with a firm voice.

"Yes aunty. I think I'll just clean a bit or maybe just watch some tv."I replied. I knew she would hurt more if I was arrested. But I knew if I stayed to long I would go to sleep and it may happen again.

Chapter 2

Part 3


We went back home and decided to stay there till tomorrow. I was still trying to figure out what I said in there and what they were talking about. I had to wait 24 hours before I would be able to find out.

The cops had left a note on the door. They were looking for me and was told I was coming here. They said if she had any more info to contact them as soon as possible. My aunt took the note and threw it away. She wanted to help me first. She didn't want me to go just yet.

"I don't think they will know if I did this", she said while going to the kitchen. "Come in here and let me get you something to eat."

I knew she meant well for me but I wanted to know what was going through her head. I had to do something. I knew she was going to talk to the doctor tonight. So I decided to put a bug in the phone. I just had to know what was going on.

That night my aunt waited till I was sleeping and called the doctor. I knew she would do that. She never wanted me to hear what she said to anyone.

"Hello Stan. It's me, Ausse. I needed to tell you that the cops came by. They heard she was here and I need you to divert them if you can."

"I sure can Ausse. I can tell them I was with you the whole day and never saw your niece. They will believe me. After all I'm a doctor", he told her.

"Good because she can't go yet. There is to much in her head we need to find. I need to know if this will be the last time she does this. I know he hurt her before and this was the last time. She took care of the problem at hand but now she has this one to deal with."

"And in time we will take care of it. Like I said before, I need to see her more. I have to see if we can stop this now before some one else or even you get hurt. I care to much for you Ausse, and I won't see you get hurt."

"Just don't hurt her please. She's all I have left and I'm all she's got. When her parents left her here, I couldn't say no. They couldn't take care of her. They were at each other's throat all the time. Then when they died, I promised I wouldn't let it happen to her. I tried to stop it before when she was a teenager but it came back."

"And we will stop it this time. I know you care about her and would hate to see her behind bars for the rest of her life, but you need to remember. Her parents were the same way. It will be hard to stop it completely but we can try our hardest."

"Yes but she doesn't know about her parents. Just that they loved her so much and wanted me to have her because I couldn't have kids of my own."

That's when I knew it. It wasn't just me. It was my parents as well. I had to talk to my aunt more about it. I had to know what happened to them really. And I had to know why this happened to us.

Chapter 2

Part 2


We left for the doctor's office as the police were coming down the road again. My aunt saw them but kept going. She didn't want to see me go to prison just yet. She wanted to help me first.

We got to the doctor's and he came out to meet us. He was in a big building. The inside was nice. It had wood floors and nice flower print wallpaper. The tiffany lamps had a nice pattern and gave a nice low glow to the room. The chairs were old but looked and felt nice.

"So, what are we here for today?", he asked.

"My needs your help. We need to target her problems and try to solve them before she gets into deep trouble and fast",my aunt said while shaking his hand.

"Well lets go in the back room then",he said.

We entered a nice light blue room. In the room was two chairs and a nice sofa. He told me to lay down on the sofa and I did. I was ready for this.

"Now we are going to you and find the source of your problem. I will count to ten and I want you to relax. 1...2.... you are getting more relaxed. 3...4... your body is limp. 5...6... you are getting sleepier. 7...8... you are almost out now. You can feel your body getting more and more relaxed. 9...10... your relaxed. Now can you tell me who is Sean Sack?"

"He is my boyfriend."

"Can you tell me what you too were doing the day of March 9th?"

"We were going out for his birthday. He picked a nice place to go. We had fun that day."

"Ok, what later that night?"

"I went home and went to bed. But I got up. I went to his place."

"Then what ? Did you too have intercourse? Can you tell me?"

"He was sleeping. I pulled the knife out of his kitchen drawer. I went into his room and stabbed him. Then I took his wallet and his ring off the dresser."

"What did you do to him next?"

"I took his body down to the car. And I put it in the trunk. I got in my car and drove to the river and lake. I dumped his body in the water."

"Then what did you do?"

"I went home and showered. Then went into the closet. And then I woke up."

"Ok, now I'm going to count backwards. As I do that, you will wake up. 10...9... you are starting to wake. 8...7... you are feeling yourself coming back. 6...5... you are getting more and more awake. 4... 3... you can feel the weight in your body coming back. 2...1... you are awake."

"So doc. What ?"

"Well, can you wait in the other room please? I need to talk to your aunt for a little bit."

"Sure doc. I'll go outside. I need a smoke anyways."

I don't know what they were talking about, but I knew it wasn't good. They had been in there for a good long time. I had two smokes before they finally came out.

"I will need to see you again tomorrow. And maybe everyday for a while. I need to do more with you.", the doctor said as we were leaving. What were they talking about? And what did I say in there?

Chapter 2

Part 1


I knew what my aunt meant by she could help with some but not all of it. I had to tell the truth to everyone to clear my name. But I needed to take care of my problems one at a time.

My aunt had my room still in the same way it was when I left here before. She never took down my poems and songs. They were what helped me before, but I don't think they will help this time. I wrote them when I was a teenager. I've changed over time. I'm not the same as I was then.

"Come in here. You need some tea and steam. Need to calm down first hun. Then I will take you to Doctor Samminer's office. He can help you out also", my aunt told me.

"Ok aunty. But can I ask why you still have these?", I asked her while holding some of the poems and songs.

"I kept those knowing you would be back. I wanted to show you that you did it before and can do it again", she replied.

We went into the kitchen where she had made some tea, and had the steam machine. I sat down at the table as she got the tea together for me. I started the steam machine up and relaxed.

"Thanks aunty. I knew I could come to you. And the tea is great", I said drinking from my mug.

"It's ok now. You'll be better in no time", she said while ribbing my back. It's made me feel better knowing she was there for me. What would I do if she wasn't there? I would have no where to go but prison.

Chapter 1

Part 3


I decided to go to my aunt's house in the next county. She would be able to help me out of this mess. She know's about my problem and know's how to handle it. I just had to get to her.

I got to her house and had to stop about three feet from the driveway. The cops had already beat me there. I'll just wait down the road. It was a country road. The nearest house was a mile away. Nothing but feilds of corn between them. If anything I knew no one would know I was there.

The cops finnaly left and I went in the driveway. My aunt was standing there on the front porch. She had a look in her eyes. She knew it was me too. She knew I did it. It was me.

"I knew you would be here. As soon as I saw the police coming up the driveway, I knew", she said with a cold sound in her voice.

"But how did you know? I never told anyone. And the cops...", I replied.

"The cops nothing. I know why your here. I can help but not with everything. I can help you stop before it gets worse. And that's all. The rest is up to you."

Chapter 1
Part 2

I sat in my room for a while. Trying to figure out what to do about this thing. I just couldn't bring myself to say it to anyone. I thought maybe, just maybe, I could contrul it. But no. I had no way of knowing what would happen it if can again.

I found out it happens when I sleep. Maybe if I can stay awake, it won't happen again. I tryed to stay up as long as I could. I turned on the television and the news was on. They found a body in the local pond. A man was killed. They had no clues really but somehow I knew they had enough to find the killer. I quickly turned it off. I knew it was me who did it. But hoped that no one else knew. It was like something inside me took over and killed him.

I had to do something to not think about it. I desided to go for a walk. I thought maybe that would clear my mind out. I happend to walk past his place. I couldn't help but think, what did he do to me that made me do that. I tryed to walk away fast but not as to make people think I did something.
Everywhere I went, people looked at me weired. I didn't know what they were thinking about though.

The next day I went to work. My co-workers looked and stared at me. Then my boos came to my cubical. He told me that I should take a few days off. He said it was because he thought I could use a break after what happend to my friend. But I knew what he really ment. The police were onto me and he wanted me to get out before I make them lose costomers. I had to get out of there. And fast!

What was I thinking?
Mood:  not sure
Chapter 1
Part 1

What was I thinking doing this? Was I not with it at all? I always ask my self that. Sometimes I think I'm someone else when stuff like this happens. Only to find out that it was really a part of me. A part that I haven't seen in a long time. But why did it come out after all these years? Why not sooner? Or later? Guess I'll have to wait to find out.
Have you ever had this problems before? Most people do but don't know what to do about it. Others don't even know they have it. And there are a few out there who don't have it at all. I always wished I was one of them. But now it's too late. I have done the worst thing of all. I have committed a crime so horrible that I can't even bring myself to say it. No it's just to harsh. To cruel and just not right. Maybe if I try to understand it I may be able to say it... but not now. Not today. Not this time.