I took a shower today. I decided to bring a knife with me into the bathroom. I carved a littel X into my leg. I dunno why but I've fallen back into bad habits and I dont care. It feels so good.
I miss Justin. He cant talk till tomrrow. I think I've fallen out of love with him. I guess I just miss him soooo much. we were supposed to hang out last weekend. And next weekend is my b-day and we were planing to have sex for the first time. I mean it was mostly joking about having sex but I know it is something he wants and it is something I want too. so on my 15th b-day I am hoping to have sex for the first time with a guy.