Winter?s Death Rattle

We?ve been under a Winter Weather Watch for the passed few days now and last night the big wet flakes began their descent. In all honesty it?s a lot better than we feared. The temperature is hovering just at 33 degrees so that the snow isn?t settling when it hits the ground, but melting. The roads are a little sloppy but it?s much better than what we thought it was going to be.

As good as all that sounds, though, winter is supposed to be over starting tomorrow! Spring starts in less than twenty-four hours and here we are, laden with snow.

I know that when we?re in the middle of July, sweating our skin off we?ll be praying for weather like this, but right now I just want it gone! I?ve had enough of winter. I?m ready to re-experience the other seasons!

I?ve said it before and I?ll say it again, I shake my fist at you, Mother Nature! You are a filthy hoor!

Home Improvement
I changed the appearance again and so far I'm not thrilled but I'm more pleased with this than the way it was before. The links were basically the same color as Spider and that made them hard to see. Now, we've got links but Spider's head is also cut off on top.

For now, it'll do.

Thank you very much for all the well-wishes I've received about my impending job change. It means a lot.

Toxic
I had the great misfortune to see Titney?s (? Kevin) new Toxic video yesterday morning. What?s a girl to do? I was innocently sipping my coffee, flipping back and forth between the Weather Channel, MTV, VH1 and (I can?t lie to you) The Waltons on TV Land (please don?t judge me ? I watch it with the sound off) and I landed on the opening scene of the video. You know, with the funny airplane jetting through the sky.

Let me first say that I recognized the music immediately but was surprised to see our girl as the flight attendant. What does that say about me? Or her, for that matter? Her music is so ubiquitous that I knew it right away, but had no idea who was singing until I saw her for myself. Is she so indistinguishable or am I just out of the loop?

Anyway, back to the story. It was like watching a train wreck. The song is inane (like most of her music), and so she decided to sex up the video (and rightly so because let?s face it, if it weren?t for her half-naked strutting would we really all be in such love with her?).

As a result, half the time she?s playing a spy wearing skimpy outfits and various wigs so as to imitate Jennifer Garner?s Alias alter ego. The other half she wearing a skin-toned body suit decorated with what appear to be diamonds or sequins.

The problem I have with Titney is that she?s not even all that talented. The music sounds so processed and mixed and shellacked that I find it difficult to believe that she could ever just sit on a stage with an instrument and sing. But I guess that?s fine. We can?t all be Norah Jones, right? Or Ella Fitzgerald. Or Billie Holiday. Or Ani DiFranco.

What is the point of this? Dunno. I guess I just still can?t believe I sat through the video. To my credit I kept thinking to myself, Turn this off! You?re IQ is dropping by the second! Did I listen, though? No. I couldn?t take my eyes off of it. In a state of horror I watched as she seduced me. I?m not proud of myself. In fact, I feel a little dirty admitting it to you.

I'm Still Laughing
From Slate Magazine:

The Post's Reliable Source column reports on a fundraiser for and at Ford's Theatre. Bush was there and made a small verbal gaffe, calling the theater, where Lincoln was killed, the Lincoln Theatre. But he was one-upped by another attendee, singer Jessica Simpson. Upon being introduced to Interior Secretary Gale Norton, Simpson complimented her, saying, "You've done a nice job decorating the White House."

Changes
Since my little job rant a few days ago, a couple of things have happened. First, the Helpdesk has fixed it so that I can see and edit this page from work again ? yay!

Second, I?ve been offered and have accepted a job. I won?t go into the details, but its a lot more money. There are a few cons but overall it?s a better deal. I sent in my letter of resignation yesterday and immediately they tried to offer me more money to stay. You know what, though? Because of what I?m making right now, a ten percent raise is peanuts. I mean, it?s been over a year since my last merit increase, let alone annual. As I said before, there were no holiday bonuses. Staying would mean that I would have to accept being taken for granted indefinitely and I just can?t do that to myself. I feel icky when I leave here at night. Like I?m doing myself a disservice.

So that?s done. The downside for you, my darling readers (all two of you), is that with the new job there?ll be less free time during the day, and therefore fewer daytime updates.

In other news, the snow is really freaking coming down hard today. The first day of spring is four days a way and we?re having a snowstorm. I shake my fist at you, Mother Nature! As Joey Pants would say, you?re a filthy hoor!

Dinner?
On my way home from the gym tonight Kevin called to see if I'd pick him up a couple of slices for dinner. While I was there I grabbed an order of moz sticks for myself. Nothing like fried cheese to complement your workout, eh?

Cheap-ass Bastards
Let me tell you a little about my day, kids. There?s so much crap that goes into this job it?s not even funny. Most of the time I find myself blatantly lying to the people we?re supposed to be, you know, helping. But that?s not what?s annoying me right now. Right now, two things are pissing me off.

First, for whatever reason, I can no longer check this site from my desk at work. It?s been ?blocked? by the Helpdesk over at Corporate. So that?s nice. The one place where I used to come when I was bored (read: constantly) to waste time and post funny things for you to look at is no longer accessible.

Second, and the reason for the above title, is that I just had to call our New York office and ask someone there to send me more FedEx Airbills (the thing you fill out and attach to the package you?re sending out, just in case you didn?t know). Why do I need to call the New York office? Why can?t I just call FedEx? Because. My office doesn?t have an account with FedEx. We used to have an account with Airborne Express and it was wonderful. I loved it. Then, for no reason, Corporate stopped paying the bills. Huh? you ask. Stopped paying the bills? How can they do that? Well, they just can. You know how I know? They just did. We are in collections because my cheap-ass company stopped paying the bills for services that they asked for. Classy, eh?

It?s not enough that I hate my job and find it mind-numbingly dull, soul deadening, and just plain irritating. No, that?s not enough. I also have to have no respect for my superiors (with the exception of one or two) or the company itself for that matter. They are constantly crying poverty and getting rid of people. I haven?t had a raise in over a year. There were no Christmas bonuses. The holiday party amounted to some take-out food thrown in the conference room. We ate and then had to be back at our desks forty-five minutes later. At the same time our Big Giant Heads drive Porches and vacation at their houses in the Caribbean. They live the kind of life most people can only dream about.

This was supposed to be a transitional thing, something to pay the bills while I finished my thesis. Now I think if I don?t get out soon I?m going to become impossible to work with. I?m very crabby when I?m here.

But it?s not my fault. I have a bad attitude because my company is full of cheap-ass bastards. So there. Yes. I?m four.

Bleeding Me Dry
I'd like to take a minute to complain about air travel. I was online today trying to find a decent fare to MN in mid-April for my bridal shower. What I found made me want to pull my hair out.

My first option was to pay a very nice $208.00 for a non-stop out and a short layover in Chicago on the way back. The problem? Each flight was FOUR HOURS LONG.

Now, I've been flying back and forth between Jersey and Minnesota for about six years now and it never takes that long, so I wondered what the problem was. Then I saw the second option, which was $356.00 for a two and a half hour flight.

So basically, if you want to get anywhere in a timely fashion you have to pay through the nose. Why can air travel be both convenient and affordable? It bites that I'm spending almost four hundred dollars (because I'm sorry, but I can't spend four hours on a plane...I just CAN'T) so that I can see my family what boils down to a long weekend. Something is inherently wrong with that.

Wanted: A Leg To Stand On
The New York Times reports this morning that: "...the House easily approved legislation on Wednesday to bar people from suing restaurants on the ground that their food makes customers fat."

This of course comes just days after the report that obesity now threatens to overtake smoking as America's number one preventable killer.

The fact that such a protective measure had to be passed makes me once again ask: Whatever happened to personal responsibility? If you overeat, you may gain weight and it's no one's fault but your own.

When will we stop passing the buck and start accepting responsibility for our actions?

Barbarossa
I just got word that a good friend in Savannah, GA just passed his comps! For those of you unfamiliar with the process of "comps", or Comprehensive Examinations, let me fill you in.

First, you select a committee of three professors who you've taken classes from and who will be able to help you write your thesis because their specializations are tied to the area you will be researching/writing on.

Then they give you written examinations. Three of them. On each exam (one for each professor all done on different days), the professor can ask you questions pertaining to any class you've ever taken with them. ANY class. You have to be prepared to write an essay on whatever they ask you to discuss. Sometimes they give you a head's up regarding what to expect, but sometimes they don't.

After the written part for all three is done, you have to have an oral exam in which you sit before your committee and they can ask you follow-up questions pertaining to your written answers. In addition, they can pretty much ask you any question that they didn't already ask you on the written part, but want to test your knowledge on.

After THAT'S done, they send you out of the room and deliberate among themselves. I've heard that this part is just to torment the student. You wouldn't be there if they didn't think you'd pass and for the most part you'd have to screw up pretty bad for them to fail you. But they send you out and they talk amongst themselves for a bit, then call you back in and tell you if you passed or not.

Speaking as someone who's gone through the process I can tell you with little hesitation that it's torture. I've never sweat so much in my life.

So congratulations! I knew you could do it!