Gail's Online Brainfart

Saturday, May 31, 2003

why is it that when there's something that's so far out of your control that that's when your parents find that it's time to blame you for it? shit...im having some problems with my loan for school again and it's starting to look like i might not be able to take the summer classes I had wanted for the next two summer modules at woodbury. my mom's pissed. like seriously pissed. i told her that woodbury is asking for about $3000 for my summer sessions and that i was working on clearing some stuff up at school for the money, but she's like mad. fuck. it's all going back to my not asking her for the money i had needed last module to pay for some of my classes, and now it's biting me back in the ass. she's totally mad that i didnt ask her for that money sooner, shit, i never asked for that money. she gave it to me cuz she didnt want me not going to school, and now she's madder that i might not go to the next module either - i understand that i should be totally grateful that she wants to give me the money, but shit, we totally fought about my going to this school. she totally was against it, and she was adamant that i was going to do it on my own if woodbury was where i really wanted to go. i said fine and decided i would take out my own loans and just deal with it. so that's what i've been doing. the only difference now is that i'm starting to be open with her and my dad about how it's going. im not lying about my making the payments or how big my loan is. i'm just coming out and telling them that they were right and it is hard, but you know what? i'm not regretting it. i love woodbury. i love the people that i encounter there. i love the teachers that i have. i love the classes that i take. going there motivates me to actually go to school...i'm not gonna quit going there, and im not gonna beg for money. i'm gonna do it, but im gonna have to do it on my timetable, not theirs or anyone else's.

posted at 7:56 PM

so dude...it's my first day to be able to sleep in, and i cant do it! what a bitch!!! it's the first day in a long time that i haven't had something planned for the butt crack of dawn and i frickin can't sleep anymore!!! dont you hate that?! shooooooooooooooooot...damn this working at 7am everyday, im so used to getting up at 6 that getting up at 830 is late for me already! terrible! now i dont know what to do with myself - no one else is out this stinking early in the morning!!!

hahaaa...now i have to find a burning software to dl...this adaptec sheez isnt working for me...boooooooooooooooooooooooooooo...im off to start surfing the world wide web! check ya later!

hey...if anyone wants to do something later tonight, let me know...im searching for interesting things to do!

posted at 9:11 AM

Friday, May 30, 2003

talking to teen just reminded me of how precious our lives are...

Aaayteeen: ok, don't mean to put a damper on your day, but i just talked to my dad, and he told me a story
Aaayteeen: so anyhow, there's this girl that he works with, that's like 21 - she's the daughter of the vice president of their company in indiana... and she's cool, he said she's like his indiana daughter, like, him and his other friends from work all go out, and she goes along with them
Aaayteeen: kind of how like the eprp nurses are with us...
Aaayteeen: so anyways, he said they all went out to dinner last night... went home
Aaayteeen: came back to work the next morning and found out she was in a head on collision and was air lifted to the main city - indiana (cause he works like 2 hours away from indiana)
Aaayteeen: and right after they came back from lunch, they found out she passed away
Aaayteeen: =(
Gail9611: : oh...
Aaayteeen: i was really sad for him
Gail9611: : how sad...
Gail9611: : that's terrible
Aaayteeen: he said that she was about to graduate from college, had everything going for her, nice family, etc...
Aaayteeen: so he called us (me and my brother) to tell us to be careful and everything... it was really sad
Aaayteeen: he said the whole office is in mourning and to like pray for her
Aaayteeen: poor girl
Aaayteeen: poor family
Aaayteeen: yeah, exactly - it sounded like my dad was gonna cry... cause he was like, i can't imagine how her dad feels - cause he knows her dad (since the dad is the vp of the company and all)
Aaayteeen: it's so sad
Gail9611: : man, imagine if that happened to someone we knew and were close to?
Gail9611: : **knock on wood**
Aaayteeen: yeah... that's what my dad's feeling... he's so sad
Aaayteeen: i felt really bad... i mean i didn't know what to say, but i'm sorry and all that...
Gail9611: : yah...i know what you mean
Aaayteeen: makes me cherish those close to me even more...
Gail9611: : i know what you mean
Gail9611: : makes me want to take advantage of the life i have
Gail9611: : you know what they say...live life to the fullest and all that junk
Gail9611: dude...21 - that's a lot of life that was taken away
Aaayteeen: yeah man... that's frikin young

so can everyone just take a little time today to just pray for the soul of this girl and the family and friends she left behind...and while you're at it, take a little time to thank God for the people you have in your life and for thanksgiving that you're still alive...

posted at 4:05 PM

Thursday, May 29, 2003

so yeah...today's been a pretty chill day...work was alright, had a pretty good meeting for my Labor/Management Partnership Team, chilled with Paul a little bit, then got to spend some time with my cousins...they're great. they're fun...

well, first of all, lemme tell you what i dont understand. i think its pretty ironic that i have been chosen to represent "labor" on a "Labor/Management Partnership" effort team. me, being the cynic that i am, fully do not believe in the union. shit - if you know me and my work ethic, you'd know that i personally think that in general, the union is for those who are LAZY. don't get me wrong - i dont doubt that oftentimes there may be an actual necessity for unions if there are corrupt managers, but for the most part, why can't "labor" and "management" just get a long? all that's ever really necessary in a work enviornment is a team or family-like atmosphere. i think what works for my unit at work - who have no labor/management issues - is that we communicate with each other. we look out for one another. we've got each other's backs and we dont let our partners struggle or look bad, if the manager looks bad, it's a reflection of his/her staff. so why make your manager look bad? that's just the way i see it. if everyone just worked together, there wouldnt need to form a "partnership" cuz shit - i'd already be understood!

now, how does this tie in? well, it just works on so many levels...in confirmation, i've learned the importance of working with the other leaders. i can't effectively plan/lead a class if i can't lead my team. if i can't find it in myself to listen to them and understand them, am i really helping to foster a good working enviornment? an enviornment that allows for growth? no. a healthy environment is one which is filled with communication, openness, and a willingness to work hard together toward a common goal regardless of what that goal is...that's what we need to teach our incoming leaders - teamwork, it's essential...

hmmm...yah...enough rambling...sorry guys...it was on my mind...maybe i'll get some more later...byebyebye

posted at 10:20 PM

Wednesday, May 28, 2003

i have no life...i felt like blogging, but i really didnt have anything to blog...bleh...

posted at 10:34 PM

MY COMPUTER WORKS!!!!
Thanks Ariel - you're the best!!!

posted at 8:20 PM

Tuesday, May 27, 2003

so yah...my computer isnt working at home...i have absolutely no idea what happened to it, but it's not working...boooooooooo! sad for me! so for all of you that think the best way to get a hold of me is to get online and im me - dude, you gotta actually call me now! so yah...hmm...what's been up with me?

sunday night chi and i took the kiddies (kookee and nino) to speed zone. dude, chi and i are sooooooooo addicted to that drum game. haahaa...it's like DDR, but with drums. it's all about keeping the beat. it's fun. we ate a round table, and kookee finally got to see chi's apartment. it was cool. it was a pretty chill night.

worked yesterday, dropped my computer off at ariel's to get fixed. had dinner with the fam's at NewTown Buffet - damn dude...we got our money's worth in chi! she tore up those crab legs. i dont think i've ever been that full in a long time. this dining experience was so much better than the last time i went there!

Happy Birthday Auntie Maricel!

until next time...

posted at 9:06 AM

Sunday, May 25, 2003

something's wrong with my template, so the currents are gonna have to change later...

so yah...i think yesterday was the longest day in my life ever...

0730: Wake-up; get ready for Jaylin's Baptism
0900: Jaylin's Baptism
0945: Picture taking
1000: Run and get balloons for Mika
1015: Meet up with Jay, Teen, n Michelle Yap - rush to CSUN
1100: Mika's P-Grad
1330: Mika's P-Grad ends - that was freaking long!
1400: BJ's for lunch
1345: Leave BJ's - head to my house to wrap Auntie Lerma's birthday gift
1610: Teen n Jay pick me up, we head to Anna's
1945: Leave Anna's
2000: Meet up with Michlle Yap n Grapes
2030: Leave for Hollywood Billiards
0900: party, party, party...damn, i got fucked up!

Today:

0230: Leave Hollywood Billards
0245: Drop Melissa off at home
0300: Paul drops me off at home
0315: Knock the fuck out...
0730: get up again...
0830: get my ass to work...

i'm fucking tired...

posted at 9:09 AM

Friday, May 23, 2003

i was actually xanga surfing tonight and i saw this and it totally describes how i feel...

I took this from my best friends xanga:

Rules of engagement:

1. Do not call first and do not call on a regular basis. Return only necessary calls!

2. Make the first move.

3. Offer to pay, sincerely, but not genuinely. (If he lets you pay, stop dating him immediately!)

4. Live your own life, have your own hobbies and aspirations.

5. Don't become last minute maid or else he will only call you last.

If these rules don't work.....grow up, be mature and face the situation head on.

My observations. These seem like good rules to live by. But it is not that easy. When you like a guy, you want to call them, you want them to call you. HELLO!! We want to talk to you. So then we wait for them to call but what you don't know is they are waiting for you to call. So, everyone is waiting for the other one to call and no one is talking. How mature is that. I feel that we are old enough to call someone and talk to them. The games should be over.

But then I had a case not to long ago, where the guy got my # and he called the next day. And i was like WHOA, he already called. Usually that should be a warning, dude what does he want?? But then me being naive, at first am surprised but then I am like wow, he seems nice, must like me. So you talk non-stop and then you all fall for each other but in the end one person standing all by themself. So its a bad thing if they call too soon or dont call at all.

But now i have had this happen, you have a great date. Or you think so at least . Communication was good, attraction was there. But then you don't hear from them. AHHHHHHHHHH. I give up on dating. I hate the game, I hate Rejection. ANd I always end up falling for the wrong one. The one that i think is TOTALLY HOT. LOOKS dont matter, that is what my mom says. Must have not dated anyone too HOT. Just kidding.

posted at 10:41 PM

Thursday, May 22, 2003

so in blog hopping this afternoon, i've come to the realization that sooooooooooooooo many people are totally into the whole American Idol craze. it seems like soooo many people i've seen have been blogging about Reuben's win. wow. yah, i would've been into it too, probably, but dang...i'm just surprised by the number of people who's blogged about it...haahaa...okay, that's my random thought for the afternoon...

posted at 6:21 PM

Wednesday, May 21, 2003

so i admit, i was wrong about 25th Hour, but i KNOW i wasnt dreaming that there was/IS a Spike Jonze who's a director...

check this out!

see...i'm not dreaming!!!

posted at 11:51 PM

so today's been a pretty good day...very chill - except for that couple of hours when i was steaming mad about carmela...shit, she has no consideration, she's known since the 8th that the doctor extended her workman's comp, and she didnt even tell us! she was expected to come in today, but she didnt show up, so i called her house, and she was like, "oh, i was gonna fax something to eugene yesterday, but..." i was like, WTF?! shit...im so tired of covering all her days. i'm dying here. but fuck...whatever. i should just keep thinking about the money i'll be making. all this OVERTIME is gonna HAVE TO pay off sooner or later, if i'm still alive to enjoy it!

anyways, back to my chill story, i had a good day, had a venting session with paul about work and that calmed me down, chilled it this afternoon, got a lot of work done actually, then did some research on school stuff, spent a little chill time at home with nino, dinner with Ashley at Buko cuz she was craving sushi, then our last Confirmation Team Meeting, then...BJ'S for MONICA's BIRTHDAY!!! yay! it was fun times tonight...just relaxing...it was nice...and hey monica...when are we gonna get some time to just chill? let me know when you have time...i'm not going to summer school right now...

...and im quite content tonight......we'll see how i feel tomorrow...nite all...

posted at 11:38 PM

Tuesday, May 20, 2003

i'm tired and we're not done yet...this project is starting to be such a huge undertaking and im starting to questions why i got myself into this mess in the first place...i dont wanna do it anymore...i wanna go to bed!

posted at 11:31 PM

Monday, May 19, 2003

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MONICA!!!

you are one of my favorite people at St. Dominic's and i hope you know how much you mean to me...you reminded me of what it meant to be a leader, and the importance of staying close to your students and making them friends. you've grown so much in the last few years, and i'm so proud to know you. you deserve the best, and that is my wish to you on your 18th birthday - may your days be filled with blessings from above that you can share out in the world...you truly are wonderful and i love you!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY again!!!

posted at 7:59 AM

Sunday, May 18, 2003

so i just saw matrix...it was alright...haahaa...geron said he didnt get it...i could totally see why someone would say that though...haahaa...

posted at 9:55 PM

Saturday, May 17, 2003

wow...im over myself now. im over my drama and i have adpoted a great attitude of "fuck it". i dont need drama...

so yah...anyways...had certification class today, it was a good class, learned a lot about pastoral care - useful stuff. had fun with all our new friends. as we've gone along in this course, the number of people we've been going out to lunch with just keeps growing. it's cool...went to pasta dinner with teen. chilled...yah...that's it...now i'm just passing my time cuz im a loser at home with no life. that' it...okay, bye

posted at 11:05 PM

ever felt just really alone? so alone that you dont know where to turn to anymore? so alone that you feel like there arent any shoulders you want to cry on anymore? that's how im feeling. im tired of working hard to save some friendships, tired of trying to make friendships work. but then again, it's a constant battle, the other party just might not feel like anything is wrong, and then who's fault is it? what if you feel like you're losing a friendship that was once so strong - or even two at the same time? two friendships that just seem to be fading away no matter how hard you try? shit...i know people come in and out of your lives, and i know that time and circumstance change your lives, but it doesnt mean that it doesnt hurt. and im hurting...

posted at 6:40 PM

today was a pretty chill day...i got to work pretty close to on time, then i got off early - what can beat that? hahaa...i only worked half day today cuz i decided that i was tired of working. after getting off work, i decided that i wanted to have lunch with ariel, so we made plans to meet after he headed out to see a client at Disney, and i chilled it with nino until around 1230. then we headed off to get some errands run...we went to get gas at costco, then off we were to pick ariel up from work. i actually tried that thai place up the street from elephant bar. it was pretty cool. it was nice spending some time with my friend. it's kinda been feeling like it's been forever since we'd talked, and i was glad to get the time with him - regardless if it was a short amount of time - to just sit down and touch base. it's weird. the past few weeks i've just been feeling very disconnected with a lot of my friends. disconnected, not in the way that i doubt their friendship, but disconnected where im just not feeling it. i dont know. it's weird. i guess it started off with a fight with a good friend, and even though it seems all good again to that friend, i still hold a lot of hurt feelings, and i dont think im ready to get past it...after that then it was a feeling of just not being content with the friends i have - sometimes when im with the girls, i feel like it's just a tired routine or rut that we're stuck in and we're not really doing anything, so i just end up feeling bleh...then came this other friend, another very good friend who i felt was going to be leaving my life due to certain circumstances, and i was just sad. feeling abandoned, and feeling out of place...

tonight, however, or this week actually, has just been a great change from my past feelings...i've had some pretty good conversations with friends this week - good times with the SDYMers at BJ's, dinner with Paul, and some very good chill time with the girls tonight and it's been great. tonight was a very welcome night of talking, eating, and gossiping with the girls, and it's really lightened up my mood...i'm starting not to feel so anti-social right now...

posted at 12:50 AM

Thursday, May 15, 2003

HAPPY BIRTHDAY Kris!!!

posted at 7:57 PM

wow...

last night, angel invited to go watch the new Matrix movie. i dont understand. they saw a 1030 showing last night, but the movie wasn't supposed to be released until today...how does that happen?

oh well...last night was rather kick-back, yet rather eventful at the same time...

it was our very last confirmation meeting with this group of students/Confirmandi...how bittersweet.
i wont lie, i'm pretty glad to have another class under my belt and to be done with it. i've totally been looking for the wednesday vacation and i'm totally ready for a new batch, and a new start. i'm so excited to start the new training to see who's actually gonna be willing to come back. i hope those that do come back will be as excited as our last set of leders were. it's definitely going to be a new adventure - too bad it starts so soon! i dont even get a whole month offf!!! BOOOOOOOOOOO!!! haahaa...j/k. anyways, all in all the last meeting went really well. i got to just sit and chill, and just enjoy my students. they were what made confirmation worth it for me. seeing them smile there every wednesday just pushed me to keep coming. i love those guys...

anyways, after confirmation, we decided to go to the "New LC" aka BJ's. dude...10pm happy hour. haahaa...it's so much more worth it! i chose the SDYM family last night instead of the crew cuz i know im gonna miss them the next few weeks that we dont have to be at st. dom's. they are always so much fun and so comforting to me. i love hanging out with them.

hmmm...what else to say...oh! LEI - i did tape it!!! if you wanna borrow it let me know. it was a really good episode, i'm dying for the new season to start! hahaa...i'm such a couch potato. you should even see, i have an away message on AIM for the time between 8-10pm - you know, Prime Time...it says not to bother me when im watching my tv! haahaa...IM me - my sn is Gail 9611 if you didnt already know. i'm such a geek. i love watching tv, and although this is one of the best tv times of the year with all the new shows and all, but damn! im so sad over the summer - there's nothing to watch! haahaa...but then again, it's okay, i'm usually too busy during the summer to watch tv anyways. haahaaa...that's it. i'm a geek - i know...

posted at 9:56 AM

Tuesday, May 13, 2003

My #1 result for the SelectSmart.com selector, ~*~Which Charmed Character Are You?~*~, is Prue Halliwell

posted at 11:02 PM

to be very honest, i havent been feeling the whole blogging thing lately cuz i've just been having such a jumble of emotions lately...it's weird and i dont really feel like i wanna talk about it, so i havent been. i'm just hoping to regain some sort of normalcy sometime soon cuz all this craziness is starting to drive me insane...

posted at 6:11 PM

working on Mika's graduation gift...it's starting to be harder than originally expected...

posted at 12:03 AM

Saturday, May 10, 2003

wow...i havent blogged in a while...havent really had much to say...

quick update:

Thursday: saw Identity with Ariel n Bobby

Friday: Lunch with Drew at the NewTown Buffet in Burbank
Shopping with Kris, Snack with Kris - had my first ever full on actual conversation with Kris Largo...that was nice. Watch Lizzie Maguire, the Movie with Kookee n Nino...umm...i dont wanna say i didnt like it, but it wasnt as good as i had expected. Dinner at Buko with the Kookee, Nino, n Mika. help Mika with her graduation invites

Today: worked. Helped chi move into her new apt. meet chi's friends. chill. im tired.

so yah...that's my life for now...if i get any interesting insight i'll let you know...later

posted at 9:48 PM

Wednesday, May 07, 2003

Angel, this is for you...

i'm such a dumbass...i had just blogged an entry about my night when my stupid ass hit sign out instead of the publish button!!! i hate it when i do stupid shit like that!!!

Anyways...

tonight i was supposed to go to st. dom's but i didnt. i got all caught up in all this other stuff - drama - here at home that i ended up being super late for confirmation. i called herbie when i was getting ready to leave, and he was like, nah, just stay home cuz they weren't doing anything anyways, so i did. it was the first wednesday in forever that i got to just chill. i vegged it totally. i think i watched my first ever episode of Dawson's Creek tonight. that was alright, plus i was going to watch the season finale of Angel - but...things happen - in this case good things happen...

while sitting at home this wednesday night, i happened to get a pleasant surprise...Ashley, AJ, n Mark decided to pay me a visit! oooohhhh...i felt soooooooooo special! it was nice just sitting, talking with you guys...you really brightened an otherwise very gloomy, drama filled day...thanks guys!!!

posted at 11:02 PM

drama sux...

posted at 7:32 PM

Tuesday, May 06, 2003

to be on a totally opposite side of what i've been talking a lot about lately...

to be very honest, im probably one of the most insecure people you'll ever meet. just ask any of my good friends and they'll tell you that it's true. shit...i'm the most insecure when it comes to interpersonal relationships. i have the utmost confidence in how i handle myself at work, at confirmation, or even at school, but when i deal with people, im not so sure. oftentimes i have difficulty letting go, and just trusting in the frienships, but today i'm looking at things differently...

have you ever had a friend where you have just stopped worrying about? a friend where you didnt have any worries or insecurities with? i think it's weird. you know, you feel that way about your family, but do you ever really think you'll feel that way about a friend? i've realized that i have a few good friends that - through time - i have found that comfort level. i have found that no matter what i say to them, or what i may do to them. no matter what a bitch i am, or how stupid i can be, i've found a few friends who i KNOW will always be there. i've found friends that no matter how much time apart, or what circumstances come between us, i have a faith and trust that they'll be back in a sense. that's what's comforting to me right now...there's still hope...haahaa...im being stupid now...i'm just saying that i think im lucky...

posted at 10:51 PM

CONGRATULATIONS CONFIRMANDI!!!

i was gonna blog last night about the confirmation, but to be honest, i was just too tired. last night was the my class's confirmation. it was beautiful. well, let me start at the beginning. shoot...i worked at 7, picked up kookee, headed home, had a quick snack with kookee n paul, then had to rush to get ready for dinner with the priest's and the bishop. dude...dinner was at 5, and shit, i barely made it on time! Fr. Anthony finally knows my name. what an accomplishment? it's amazing. haahaa...those priests are seriously funny. they were making jokes throughout dinner and fr. gerald is just the cutest priest ever! haahaa...so yah, i was in dinner with the priests until about 630 - dude, why was everyone and their mom calling me?

shoot...it was all good though cuz eventhough the beginning of the confirmation was a little hectic, i dont think anyone can understand that amount of pride i was feeling as i watched the students - mine especially - walk down that aisle in their red gowns. i know that i complain about confirmation and the lack of dedication that's been there, but last night it was different. those teenagers were out there, looking beautiful in their gowns, ready to accept their faith as adults. it was really a beautiful thing. as i looked around during the bishop wilkerson's homily, it touched me to see so many of the students so intent on what he was saying. they were listening and i was so proud. i'm going to miss the confirmandi, im gonna miss their humor, their insightfulness, and more importantly their willingness to be open to us. it was a pretty good two years and i'm really gonna miss my group...i hope they keep in touch, and they stay around.

in other news, after the confirmation, some of us leaders headed out to celebrate another year under our belts and we've found our new "LC". no more denny's every wednesday night. it's bj's for us. can you believe that it actually could end up being cheaper? haahaa...i'm ready for the change of scenery. i love my SDYM family. we've done a great job guys!!! we should be proud of what we've accomplished!!!

posted at 9:43 AM

Sunday, May 04, 2003

i just had a realization of why my friends have been all about hiding shit lately...well, i guess it's normal, but it hurts just the same...it's all about image. they do it because they're afraid of disappointing you, or looking bad to you, but shit - it's inevitable. disappointment is a part of life and oftentimes we need to give each other the chance to make their own decisions and judgements rather than assuming that they're gonna be all disappointed and shit. we're all human and maybe we just need to be honest with ourselves rather than denying what's really going on...it's all relative, that's life, we all have weaknesses and it's just a matter of how much we're willing to share with others...

in examining myself, i begin to understand why others have been doing the same thing. we're all just scared of what everyone else will say. yah, i tend to tell myself, fuck the world, i do what i wanna do, but i know that that's never gonna be completely true. i've got feelings and i care what people actually think. i dont want people thinking that i cant stick to something or that i cant get over something when i say that i can...i guess i need to be more understanding that that's not just true for me, it's true for other people too - regardless of what they say, or how much they say they dont care what other people say, cuz shit - we all do. we all care what other people say about us on some level, no matter what - no exceptions. we can play off like we dont care, but i know we do...fuck...we just all need to be more understanding that we all feel that way.

posted at 10:35 AM

so i tried to blog last night, but blogger wasn't behaving, so to the trusty palm pilot...

here's last night's blog:

May 4th 0216:

Kookee's birthday party is now officially over, n i think it went pretty well. She looked like she had a good time n i think all of her friends that showed up did too...which of course is a good thing. the turn out was pretty good too - they totally filled that living room of ours! we had a mini soul train over there by the stereo, with like a minimal number of cd's (cuz we were too lazy to get more im assuming), but it was all good and the kiddies had a good time getting their groove on...haahaa...

we gave kookee her first shot! it was a halfer though - of jim beam! - i wonder what effect a whole one would have! haahaa...kookee was so cute today! i'm so happy she had a good birthday - she deserves it. she's a good kid - i love that girl!

Happy birthday again Kookee!!!

posted at 10:27 AM

Saturday, May 03, 2003

oh...btw...

HI ANGEL!!! i didnt know you read...haahaa...

posted at 1:23 PM

ever feel ready to give up on something? ready enough to just go ahead and say "fuck it"? ever been hurt from trusting that you just dont think you wanna do it anymore?

that's how i feel. i feel like, shit...everytime i feel like i trust someone with my everything it just backfires. i care too much. wtf is that? should a person just say fuck it, keep their mouth shut, and just pretend they dont see what's happening? fuck it...take on a whatever attitude...it guess that's what it's gonna be for me...fuck having friends, sometimes its more drama than having a boyfriend...forget it...let's just save the drama

posted at 1:21 PM

one more?

what color are you?

posted at 1:34 AM

haahaa...i thought this one was funny...

cooler than the fonz!

I'm just a cool person. People like me.

Why do people read your Livejournal?
brought to you by Quizilla

damn...im really bored...i should go to sleep!

posted at 1:32 AM

-Sensitive- You're Sensitive, and you'd like to
stay that way. Sorry,listened to a bit too much
Jewel there. You're sweet and very emotionally
charged. You definitely love the person you're
with, and always want to know how they're
feeling so you can make sure they're happy.

What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

posted at 1:30 AM

when in doubt of what to blog...as Lei says...take quizzes!

You are a Gentle Dreamer...
Your a deep and kind person, and sometimes very
quiet. Your idea's never cese to amaze the many
people who seem to flock twords you, or perhaps
its the way you present your cool and calm
demenor. But never the less, be careful. Being
too calm could lead to many false ideas.

What kind of Dreamer are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

posted at 1:24 AM

Friday, May 02, 2003

i hate it when people lie to you and you know they're lying...sometimes it makes you just think that you'd totally be better off without friends...

posted at 3:47 PM

Thursday, May 01, 2003

it's pretty much official now...i'm sick

posted at 12:40 PM

angelie is the cutest...i love that girl...she's just so sweet...

posted at 12:19 AM

i seriously think im starting to get sick. this non-stop working is bullshit. i think this shit's gonna kill either me or paul - maybe even both of us. dude, what i dont understand is, if carmela can freaking drive, why the hell cant her ass work?! it's not like we do manual labor or any of that junk. she doesnt have to type with both her hands - shit, most of the nurses dont type with two hands, besides, her ass types so slow anyways! it wouldnt make a difference anyways, so fuck it. her ass should just work to do the tape downloads and so that paul and i would have to be busting our assed to cover her shifts...fuck man, i'm totally feeling myself getting sick and im scared i'll have to call in one of these days and there wont be anyone to cover me. life's a bitch. whatever...

anyways, i need some chill time, some time to just enjoy my friends. i'm totally looking forward to this friday's outing with the girls. it's been forever since we've all hung out and i miss them. for a while there it was starting to be overkill, and too much, but i need them every once in a while to balance my life out and to help me chill. i just start to feel frustrated when im with them 24/7 and im pretty sure they feel that way too sometimes...it's only natural isnt it? yah it is.

tonight was kinda bittersweet. it was our last official class for confirmation. our last class for the 2001-2003 class. i cant believe they're already getting confirmed this monday. it's not even a week from today! in one sense i'm gonna totally miss them, yet in another, im excited for the new adventure. i'm excited for the training and the new friends im gonna make. but i'm sad to see the friends i've made this year disappear. i know that there's no way im gonna hang out with them or even see them in the future, but i only hope that they get that calling and feel my talks one day, that they may experience love and God through what we've taught them the past two years...i love teaching confirmation...i love what it does to people and most importantly i love how it brings me closer to God every single time...

so yah...that's it...im starting to get sleepy...i better get to bed before i wake up late again tomorrow...i was soooooo late waking up this morning! haahaa...nite all...im outie

posted at 12:12 AM