A.L.A.A.= Avril Lavigne Assassination Association

hey. this site is here for me to bash on avril lavigne. id like to thank jenny from jenny-girl.net for unknowingly inspiring this website. being as im building this from school, it will be a bit minimal until i can add pix and shit from an outside source. now for myself: my names joe, im a 15 year old person who cureently resides in a tiny hick town in the mountains of pennsylvainia. i try not to label myself with cliques becuase they are the devil and sooo obviously created by preps in order to segregate. but if i absolutly must resort to labels, i fall into multiple categories. goth, punk, freek/phreak and various others of the same. asshole is my favorite one though. my hobbies include singing, writing poetry, songs, music and short stories, playing any of the 8 instruments im proficient at, and about any extreme sport known to man, and some that aren't (i.e. extreme nude boating, and goldfish rodeo). i also enjoy comix, playing video games, watching movies, porn (c'mon, im your average adolesent male), and reading novels. my fashion sense is impeccible and for my area unique. (im the only person in my school that wears, fishnet, halfshirts, lipstick, nail polish, eye liner, mascara, and combat boots all at the same time.) to dissaude any confuzion, yes i am a guy. last time i checked there was a hunk of flesh hanging between my legs. (no not the tumor or the dead baby marmoset, its between those) for anyone interested in contacting me my email link is below. my aol is wikidklown101 and my yahoo is sic_maggott666A. also if your interested in buying selling or trading unique clothing, or things pertaining to real music then contact me, im sure we can work out something. incidentally, im in the market for a new kilt. black. ponder.... now to the avril section. (nearly gouges eyes out.)sorry reading that name has a terrible effect on me. by now, many people are wondering: "what the fuck? avril is so much like this guy, whys he hate her?" well please allow me to clear this issue up. first off that sad wasted little girl (yes i know she's older than me)is nothing like me. shes like the token blakc guy in a movie. she embodies everyhting about people like me that is stereo typical. except for the whole bubble gum pop thing, thats all her own. i mean she wears the style all wrong. she claims she being unique but the music she makes turns teenie bopper brain washed chicks into mindless clones of her! how are they unique? i mean the way things are going, itll be more unique to be a prep!(now i know im sick, i read that and no. no. thats just...no.) she brings shame to whats now becomeing a uniform of spiked hair and jewlery, and obscure clothes! now i gotta break off for a moment and say that good charlotte are just as bad, if not worse. back to avril. shes just a prep in punks clothing! she is a fuckin brainless twit! i mean the traditional meaning of punk music is music with a message, possibly politically fueled, music your parents hate and that you can fuckin thrash to. avril has completely obliterated any credability punk music had by turning it into "im sad cuz he wont date me, im gonna go take some asprin and hope people feel bad for me" music that parents are willing to withstand on long car trips! i mean im absolutly certain that if i put the sex pistols or the ramones or the misfits on in my car, 2.5 seconds later, the radio would be chillin on the freeway! avril lavigne is making a mockery of one of the best forms of music around. and because of her people true to the music are the brunt of this bullshit pop culture flume ride shes started! oh i have ot add this just as a matter of principal: RAINBOW BRITE SUX CAMEL NUTS! (ahem) incidentally, just cuz i like to dream of fluffy pink. bunny rabbits, doesnt mean her music should sonically embody them! initially this site was supposed to talk about why avril is the devils daughter but ive gotten carried away. ill try and post something new and more on the topic tomorrow. later. man i wish info space hadnt shut down, their web hosting was way better. music, graphics and a much better text editor. for anyone who cares, i might be starting a new site on geocities for my homepage, since i have nothing better to do with my life and one of my friends has advised it. now before i begin my daily rant about how much avril lavigne sux and how she is the devils play thing, im gonna post some factual things about how badly people think she sux. the source for todays information is the february 2003 issue of alternative press, the readers poll 2002 results. they are as follows. Worst Concert of 2002: #2: Avril Lavigne, Worst CD: #1: Avril Lavigne, Let Go ;Worst Artist: #1 Avril Lavigne, Give Me a Shotgun and Amnesty and I'd save the world from ________: #1: Avril Lavigne, Most Outplayed fashion Trend: #1: Dressing like Avril Lavigne. and there were some more but i cut up that page for stuff to put on my wall so most of its gone. if i can remember anymore though ill post it.monkey balls. ovular ones. =) so anyway im in a horrible mood today because im realizing i was having much more fun being single then i am with a gf that i never see. that and my batteries died in my discman so i cant listen to deadsy, ozzfest, pwei, or twiztid, which is what ive been rotating in and out of my cd player. im hoping that ill be able to get some pix up on the site soon, but if i start a geocities site, then ill post em there. most will be me with friends, family and cats. (i love animals) but a few will be from my very recent birthday. pictures of me and hooters girls. =) mucho bootie galore! so anyway back to the topic of how much avril lavigne sux. man i wish i could remember how to make sub pages and shit so this wasnt so garbeled and confuzed. i hate it when ive got 10 different topics all on one main page and its hard to discern when you switch topics. plus it interupts my flow. now where was i? oh yes. avril lavigne takes what it means to be a non conformist, music loving punk and turns it into a sorority life cotten candy pink carson daily mtv world. and mtv fucking sucks! its used to be music television, now its like mediocre television.i mean their supposed to be playing music and videos and shit not this dumbass tv shows like jackass, sorority life, or i bet you will or whatever else. i mean cribs and diary are ok cuz at least they are music related but 99% of the bull shit mtv plays is just filler for the masses. the average american attention span refreshes every 11 seconds. ever notice how nothing stays on the screen or atleast without some profound action for more than 3 seconds on mtv? i mean the only thing i think that is on longer than that is carson dailys oh so punch-able face. i swear to god if i made it to new york and saw that mother fucker, they wouldnt be able to pull me off him. the urge would be to great, and i wouldnt be able to stop punching him. they have to cut my fuckin arms off to get me to stop swinging, and dont forget the legs. that mother fucker would never be reproducing. i think it should be illegal for people like mtv fans, carson daily, my little sister and teenie boppers to reproduce. they increase the surplus population and create mindless drones focused only on the mall, food, tv and guys. that one of the major reason's avril must be stopped. the more impressionable young minds that are converted to pop-dom and mindless stupidity, the higher the stupid baby rate will be. schools and librarys will fall into disuse. theyll make people like avril lavigne and britney spears and j lo political leaders and royalty. the intelligent people like myself and others who realize the reality of this evil will be left in short supply. we'll take to living underground like c.h.u.d. (i love b-movies). we'll form underground resistance movements to annhialate these evil daft bubble gummers. ok.... calm down. i sound paranoid dont i? im starting to sound like my real father. (hes so paranoid he thinks the fbi hacks into my computer and tries to watch him through my wbcam. i mean he's not that interesting! all he does is bitch, smoke pot, and play video games on his computer! oh and preach his theories on government conspiracy.) well i realize this post was a bit off topic, but oh well. i may try to post more later but if not then you'll have to be content with the words of wisomd and paranoia that ive given you for now. later. ok i just remembered something. anyone with questions, comments, complaints or insults, please email me. i love corrospondance dont you? also if you want me to link you or you wanna link me lemme i know and send me your url. i have realized after a bit of confuzion and aggravation on my behalf that none of my links work. argh! so if you want to visit any of the sites please do the following. hover your mouse cursor over the link script, and look down in your statur bar ( the one with the loading thing on it) and read the last bit of the address shown. it will be the address for the actual link. then just type the address in and be on your way. ill try to find tou what the fuck is up and see if i can fix it, but if not then we're all s.o.l and angelfire sux almost as bad as rainbow brite. hopefully i get it fixed cuz i dont wanna insult this webhosting. they've been good to me over the last 4 1/2 years that ive been using it for various sites of mine, most of which i forget the usernames, passwords and urls to. oh well. later freaks. hey its me again. i got my preliminary site up at geocities, so ive decided to devote this site entirly to the anti avril movement. its www.geocities.com/sic_maggott666a/the_cradle_to_enslave.html since my links here dont work, just type it in and go. the links there DO work though. ok so today im in school. wearing my usual clothes. my fishnet shirt, my black lipstick ,my hairs done, i have strappy jeans with zippers and eyelets all over em and of course my customary combat boots. just chillin, updating sites and checkin out new ones. i found a really cool one called www.candyappleblack.com they have some awesome links too. now on to avril! im sitting here talking to my friend chelsey the other day. shes pretty cool, one of those hot punk girls who likes cky, the distillers, the ramones, rancid and shit like that. awesome girl. wouldnt mind dating her myself but we are both tragically taken. =( if i was crazy id stalk her, lol. but im not so for now ill just flirt with her. =) yay! but anyway. shes talking to me about her friend jessica. she came to school wearing those sleeve things. i wear em too and my intention is not to diss on people who wear em cuz i think they're awesome. but anyway. her and her friends were in a bathroom hanging out or something when my neighbor comes in. my neighbor is about 16, shes short, a cheerleader, gorgeous like a model, and a complete and total bitch. (you knew it was too good to be true) but she also happens to be an avril lavigne fan. (god knows why, mos def not her style) now i thank whatever higher power that angela doesn't dress like a stereo typical posuer-esque avril fan. nay she sticks to her typical prep clothes. specifically abercrombie and fitch, aeropostale and all that other shit. but i digress. anyway angela walks in the bathroom and sees jessica and chelsey with the sleeves and say "oh you're wearing those avril things! i love avril" and chelsey just burts out laughing at this pathetic little poser wretch, because shes read this page and finds it hilarious and as far as i know she has no interest in avril lavigne. now i also found the story funny but i got me to thinking. why let the little homeless crackwhore ruin the credability and reputation of us true punks all over the world? people that when they play a guitar they SHRED!! instead of play cheezy little bubble gum riffs. so i am devising a plan to publically humiliate avri llavigne. i dont know when shell be touring near here, but im going to save money and buy a ticket. then i will crash the concert from the front row and take pictures. but i need something really amazing that borders on illegal to do, in order to give her lots of negative press and hopefully discourage her music career. any one have any ideas? if not then this will have to go on the back burner for a while cuz my minds frozen lately form all the creative shit ive been doing. also if anyone is interested and they play guitar, im selling a black bc rich warlock in good condition. name tag on headstock says big sexy. ive had an offer of 150 $ and if anyone can match or beat that price, we may have a bidding war. if interested, email me. freekshow@motocross.com or blade_525@hotmail.com. before i forget, never use the cnt editor on here. i used it to expand my text, cuz html wasnt working and it fucked up my counter. now i have it fixed and the counter reset! and im pissed cuz i had almost 100 hits in one day for a site that isnt advertised! except now it is advertised on jenny-girl.net/antiavril because i joined the movement. but anway. hope you like the new background and main image. if you dont, then fuck you. later y0 its me again. welcome to another beutiful monday morning. really it is! its bright, but with grey skies (my favorite) the breeze is cool, and fragrant. the morning silence allows me to sing melodically to myself, whereas i cant normally. and heres another morbidly fasinating episope of the ALAA page! yay! i dont have any new news today but i do have a good link, its in my links section but it doesnt work so here: www.jenny-girl.net/antiavril is jennygirl's anti avril site, that inspired me to start mine. shes got an awesoem site up, her views are extreme and hilarious, and although ive never had communication with her, she seems pretty damn cool from her site. i dumped my gf over the weekend. i feel like a slime but oh well, shell get over it. i mean i dumped her saturday, stayed home in my jammies all day sunday and by the time i arrived at school nearly 2 hours late on monday, i have 2 new girlfriends. and they both know about the other, and they are both bi, they're a couple and they both want em to take their clothes off with my teeth (basically) isnt life grand? im not having much luck selling my warlock, but oh well. im going to buy the new bronze series warlock package from musicians friend. so anyway i dotn have any new avril news and i havnt checked my email since friday so anyone that sent me ideas for my gate crashing plan, i have yet to read them. ill probably have more to update after i check my email tonight. oh and my lil sis has that damn satanic avril lavigne cd, so i think im going ot steal it and deface it horribly, and then let her find it on accident. (insert maniacal laughter here) i mean cant she listen to something normal like cradle of filth, dimmu borgir, at the gates, emperor, morbid angel, blakc funeral or something remotely aurally and asthetically pleasing? AHHHHHHHHHH. well i gotta go. smile. fuckers. hey, its me again. not a ton of avril news but some neat shit all the same. if you like demons or hate high school or just want to read a neat web comic, go to faith.rydia.net its a comic called demonology 101 and its pretty cool. its not like a funny comic, but its not meant to be, its just really cool and for all the supernatural crap in it, its actually kinda realistic. so anyway, today's my last day at this school, and im unsure of the computer access at my new one so we find ourselves in a predicament. i dont have a comp at my house, although i will have the net soon. so my updates will be few and far between until i can get something figured out. but i can promise that ill try to update whenever i can. hopefully, i can make it a once a week thing from the library. and i can absolutly positivly assure that i will have a special update chock full of nuts...i mean nifty stuff, when we reach one hundred hits. i feel kinda ill cuz my hits have gone os slow latly, but i cant expect much from an unadvertised site that bashes on one of todays teen POP stars. you read right muther fuckers, shes pop! (i love insulting my loyal and loving readers, cuz they dont care, they love me no matter what, and the ones that ger pissed cant do SHIT about it!, *giggles maniacly*) im thinking of taking my sisters avril cd and micro-waving the fuckin thing. and cue music( you spin me right round baby, right round like a record....) lol.im a sick sick demented individual. yay! but i know you all love me. you better. or i might find you and kill you. spongebob square pants sux. not as much as rainbo brite but still pretty bad. and all you so called punks who claim him as a staple of non conformity are sick twisted sad pathetic little people. and your just as bad as avril. poseurs! and on a minorly hypocritical note, invader zim would mop the floor with spongebob any day of the week! it sux that hes not on tv any more though. but i dont have cable either so fuck it. oh anyone whos really demented or just likes weird story lines and artwork should most definatly check out jhonny the homicidal maniac comics. also, squee, devi, i feel sic, and lenore are comics with similar humor and art. they're fuckin awesome! if i can find the url ill paste it, its for an excellent fan site. theres no official jhonny site that ive been able to find, but a lot of the fan sites have bits form the comics you can check out to see if you want to spend 5 bucks a comic on em at hot topic, a comic shop, ebay, or other online retailer. also, a bunch of people have pointed something out to me, and it may seem a bit hypocritical but ill tell ya anyway. as much as i hate avril lavigne for her bad music and posuer-esque, stereo typical punkness, i think shes fuckin hot. so sue me. to make matters worse, this girl kristen "fred" kelly, who ive been stuck on since i first met, looks a LOT like her. and kristen's hot too, but she falls into the avril fan teenie bopper category. i feel bad for saying that cuz she'll read that and kick my ass (i cant fight back, ill never hti a woman) but its the truth. but chelsey its a totally punk chick. hardcore through and through. so they cancel each other out. im crazy abotu both of em, they're both hot, chelsey's taken and fred's not interested so they're kinda similar as well. plus i got this kinky manage twa (sp) relationship going on with my gf and her gf. so its cool. weird, but cool. and again, theres another girl who im not with, i dont even live in the same state as her. most amazing girl ive ever met, and shes helped me with a ton of hard shit in life, and now ive just regaind contact with her, and i feel really guilty for the playerism im displaying now. well anyway, sorry to throw out emotions and problems like that, and sorry for the lack of news, but hope oyu enjoy the posts and the site. ill update when i can, and see you on the flipside. smile.fuckers.=)one last quick thing. i added a new sub directory. i cant figure out how to link it, but its for pictures. for now they're of cradle of filth, but later they'll be me. the link is www.angelfire.com/freak2/avrilmustdie/images/pix.html dont worry if it wont work at first, keep trying. i designed the damn thing and it took me all of 15 minutes just to get a look at it.also im gonna do the one hundred thing at 120 hits, cuz the last 15 are me trying to get the damn thing fixed. FUCK! ANGELFIRE SUX! Y0! what the fuck is up you internet addicted muther fuckers! im reading this web comic today right, and i got an idea. im going to start a group of prakers and vandals and possibly arsonists just for something to do. and we shall refer to ourselves using only nicknames. example, im hollywood, chelsey is shorty, and logan is tons of fun, etc etc. sounds like a mutha fuckin plan! so anyway whats going on? my life, a.k.a. the dateless void, is ok. today i was sposed to start my new school but the muther fuckers dont hae my paperwork yet so im just kinda chillin at my old school and doing absolutly nothing! branden lee rules! the crow movies are the absolute best cult flicks i hav EVER SEEN! so anyway no new news about avril today. i realize ive been slacking off but fuck, its hard work coming up with funny shit to say and witty euphamisms every damn day! also youll notice that my images are gone. if you want to view them, go to www.angelfire.com/freak2/avrilmustdie/images/pix.html to view pix. so anyway im doing ok. my gf misses me and that sux, cuz i almost never get to see her. shes always grounded. plus i forget exactly where she lives so i cant go see her. last night she was sposed to come over to my house at about 4 am so we could make it happen but she never showed. i wanted to wax it till it shone like a new cadillac, but i ended up just giving myself a port polish. it sucked. but oh well.i gotta go do something. ill update later. hey mortals. this page is rapidly degenerating into just page to run my mouth and occaisionally rant. first order of business is a new link. i used to identify myself as a wiccan, and to be hoest, itd be nice to be ignorant and still be able to claim as such. but here's a site for any wiccans, posers, and people interested. now before i put the link, if you go to this site, READ IT MUTHER FUCKER! dont just piss off and start ranting because you dont like the title. read it before your ignorant ass starts whining about how your oppressed and persecuted. the site is www.whywiccanssuck.com go and read. research. learn. become empowered, lightened, etc. or be ignorant, ignore the message and bitch to the 4nongoths about how much they suck and Xianity (love that term) is evil. now, lets roll with the new. i got my first tattoo over the weekend. i was sposed to get ti done like 2 years ago but inever had the cash. now ive got this demonic gargoyle thing on my right arm. im also getting a tribal dragon and flames on my neck, and a panel on my right shoulder blade. but anyway, it was like 120 $ but i gave george (the tatto guy) my b.c. rich warlock and the hard case to it an he gave me store credit. how fucking cool is that shit?!?!?!? the place i got it at is TWISTED INK. for anyone in the north east PA area, go there for your piercing and tattooing needs. george and the other guy are excellent and they are some of the funniest and coolest guys ive ever met. they're at 57 Grow Ave. Montrose Pa 18801. (570) 278-6900. its a local call if you are in sussquehanna, (like me) new milford, halsted, montrose, or great bend or the surrounding areas. their work is incredible and they're very good about sterility. no they didnt pay me to plug them, or give me free inking, im doing this out of sincereity. the place kicks ass. so anyway, i got my tattoo, my phone is on, i got my taxes done, my internet is back up, i got a new computer, i got my paperwork done to change schools, all kinds of neat shit. my weekend was a busy one. i tried calling that chelsey girl, (the one i wrote of earlier. if you remember cool, if not, go back and read) over the weekend but her brother answered and said wrong number and hung up. DICK! ahem. sorry, lol. so anyway this awesome chick started emailing me. her names lacey, she's friends with the girl who inspired this site (www.jenny-girl.net) and she the absolute atom bomb. i aint checked my email in about a week so i gotta do that tonight. anyone that emailed me, dont get pissy, ill write back as soon as i can. ive decided that i take back what i said about todays link. if you want to read that site name and automatically flip out, then go right ahead, im not going to be held resposible for the ignorance of other, weaker minded individuals. well ive nothing else to add for now so maybe ill update when i get home. fuck off. wheres the vodka?....ok ive got 2 problems in my love life and im looking to you, my loyla (yeah right) readers to advise me. please email me any advise you may have. first off, i got this gf right, but i never get to see her out of school even though she lives right down the road, and tomorrow(tuesday) i (finally) start my new school. what should i do? break it off, keep going despite complications, suggestions? and the second is more severe. i love my girlfriend, a lot. shes incredible. but this girl, chelsey (yes it all comes back to her)well, everytime chelsey walks into the room i cant even remember my girlfriend exsists. i start to forget my name, if im talking then i stumble over words, and i smile uncontrolably like a doofus. and then my heart races and my chest constricts especially when i talk to you, i used to be extremely shy and now its returning to bite me in my ass) and sometimes i sit at my desk and i cant help but just look at her. if you knew her youd understand, because she is possibly one of the most incredibly gorgeous women ive ever met. and shes smart, funny, fun loving, cute as hell, the cuttest laugh, i like everything about her. but she has a bf and im taken and i dont feel guilty for liking her, but i feel bad because i have a girlfriend. and i dno what to do on that note either. should i tell chelsey, even though ill sound like a dork, or email her so i dont have to face rejection and condescention, or just forget it and move on? email me with advice. any help is greatly appreciated.later. hey loyal readers! im finally back after a year long hiatus, but blow me, this punk marches to the beat of his own drummer! so anyway, this last year was full of changes for your beloved leader. ive spent the last 6 months or so in foster homes, rehabs, and in and out of A.A. meetings, so im clean and sober for 6 months. i wonder if you can become straight edge after pass drug abuse? ill have to ask my cousin mike, hes straight edge and lives in seattle. guys fuckin awesome. so anyway, ive mostly been skating, and hanging out around the house, i just finally got out of foster care. im getting my band back together, because we were doing fucking awesome before i got locked up. we're not sure if we want to be the smashing pumpkins or cradle of filth, because the 2 songs weve finished are completely different. one is traditional screaming norwegian death metal, that preaches about anti consumerism, and the other is a soft punk/art rock song we wrote on an acustic about our pasts where i sing. but dont think chris carrabba. any bitch breaks down crying at one of my shows ill personally toss her the fuck out. i got no time for that fuckin commercialised regurgitated mainstream shit. oh by the way im starting a business. any donations on behalf of this would be greatly appreciated since the government is taking their sweet ass time processing my disability claim. send money orders, checks, or cash to The Edge of Midnight, c/o Joe Smith rr2 box 34u sussquehanna, pa 18847.(money orders or cahs are preferred methods of donation as the banks around here like to fuck around) so anyway, this is what its gonna be. the top floor im going to use my own finances to build an apartment for myself, my band, and maybe my girl if ive got one when its all said and done. most girls wont put up with my goals and dreams of rock stardom for long. they stick around for a few months at most, going to practices with me, loaning me gas money(which i always paid back, thank you very much) and they decide im never gonna out grow the "13 yr old rock star fantasy thing" but anyway, im also building office space and a vip room on the top floow. the main floor wil have a large stage and venue area, because we have shit loads of excellent local rock acts around here and very few good venues and bars for them to play. id also like to put an all nude gentlemens lounge with juice bar, but lets take things one at a time here. maybe when i hit 21 ill spend the 20 grand to get a liquer liscence and put in a bar, who knows. and in the basement i intend to build nothing but skatepark, cuz i no so many skateboarders who are so sic its not even funny but we got no place to skate and the bacon always takes our boards. i mean fuck, my friend Anthony Ferro, (who also plays amazing bass in my band) is a sponsered board-pusher by ledge-wax out of new milford pa. so anyway, im not just doing this to make money, im doing this to a) give something back to my community and friends, b)provide a scource of entertainment for local teens like myself at very little profit to myself,(because really, in the end,its all about the kids,) and c) to do something with my life and feel like i have purpose. anyone with any further questions, advice, suggestions, or input i implore that you contact me as soon as you can. blade_525@hotmail.com or 570-853-3059. thanx alot to any who contribute to our cause. you will be recgonized within the business and community and your helpful contributions will be well spent and appreciated.

some kick ass sites

homepage of the person who inspired this site.
jenny's anti avril site
awesome webcomic. its hilarious
excellent site for some excelllent bands
one of the BEST dark metel bands in the world. listen to some clips, check some links.
a site for fans of the play/movie hedwig and the angry inch. learn about it and then buy the movie! you wont be sorry.

Email: freekshow@motocross.com