WHEN?
Sept. 29, 04 | Wednesday
DA HANGOUT?
Making the $$$ at lab
IN COMPANY OF?
Fellow co-workers
DA MOOD?
Not so damn bad because I'm expectin someone
DA DETAILS?
Goldie ate Copper. Remember that picture of my fish I showed ya? Well Goldie is the biggest one there, and now that Peter (the black moor) is gone, he gone and picked on the two babies until their tails and fins were all screwed up. We had to separate them all. Then I thought: Goldie was probably just playin and gone too far..he won't actually go and kill his buddies. So I put the babies--well hardly babies anymor--Copper and 2-Tone back in the big tank with Goldie, and less than a week later, Copper was floating upside down. I can't quite believe it, but then nightfall came and the truth came out. Copper had sank down to the bottom, and when I came home from class, his stomach was almost all gone! Peter (my bf) was all smug and said "See he's a killer" but I just had to see it for my own eyes. Sure enough, Goldie moved in to the dead Copper for more bites; he ferociously attacked his dead buddy and tried to eat what's left of his body.
Effin-shit! Now that'll explain the past mysterious disappearances of his other tankmates--the guppies and another corydora. I just couldn't believe Goldie. It's not like we don't feed him! But I guess that's the animal kingdom. Now 2-Tone is staying in another tank indefinitely. We're contemplating putting him back with Goldie but I don't know. Peter has also adopted 4 baby tilapias. He calls them the Bloodhound Gang. I don't know why.
That's my fish story for the day.
WHEN?
Aug. 16, 04 | Monday
DA HANGOUT?
Staying up late! Yay!
IN COMPANY OF?
Peter
DA MOOD?
Grrreeeaaaat!
DA DETAILS?
Here's the roundup:
* The summer semester's over (only since 2 days ago)! I'm so relieved because I survived the sarcastic bitch. Hehe...I shouldn't say that, but it's true! I really don't agree with her so-called teaching, but I managed to get an A (no easy task this time!) and so I will keep quiet!
** Today, dammit, is the start of the fall semester, so I must endure yet more of the same.
*** I finally went out last night. We hit GIG and then Angel Wings, which I didn't know was a gay spot. See what a virgin I am? I was drinking juice the whole night until we headed to Angel Wings, which I then downed 2 screwdrivers. The "gay" spirit was contagious. Hehe.
**** After watching Hidalgo, I WANT A HORSE! I love them animals, period. But Hidalgo is so beautiful, even when at first, I thought he looked like he had vitiligo. I WANT A HORSE! and I want to keep it in my room.
***** After having a married guy, who seemed all innocent at first, flirt with you, wouldn't you be afraid that the guy
you marry would do the same to another woman? The guy had some charm, but I had to resist.
And that's the lowdown, ladies and gents. :)
WHEN?
July 13, 04 | Tuesday
DA HANGOUT?
Home alone
IN COMPANY OF?
Nobody
DA MOOD?
Pissed
DA DETAILS?
I’m trying to understand this whole “family comes first” thing. I don’t disagree with it, but Peter’s acting as if they need him in everything they do. Take tonight, for instance. All day long we’ve been waiting to come home from school and work and we know we need some rest before we settle in to study for a test tomorrow. So we got our rest and our tummies filled.; we’re ready to open up the books. Then we find out that the car is acting up. So Peter decides to tend to that, and I am for it because the car is an essential part of our life, so we want to make sure it’s running tomorrow. But
then when we drove down to his sister’s place to test out the car, he saw an opportunity to get out of studying. His bro-in-law was sanding down the boat, with at least 2 other boys helping him. Peter had said that we weren’t staying there long—“just stopping by.” We ended up leaving there an hour later, and him informing me that after he drops me home, he’ll be going back to help out. I was immediately mad. Do you see what’s happening here? I don’t know how he expects to pass his damn class if he never studies and doesn’t turn in his homework. I always have to remind myself that I’m not his mother, that I shouldn’t be nagging him about when his assignments are due. Unfortunately, I always end up “nonchalantly” telling him his homework is due. And
still that doesn’t get him to do it. So here we are this Tuesday night. Bob (his bro-in-law) is not entering his boat for a contest tomorrow. It’s neither a big boat nor is he sanding it alone. So why the f*ck is Peter throwing away this chance to study for our f*ckin hard class? Because when he comes home, he’ll be “so tired” he just won’t look at any books. He’s always that way. He always gives in to his sleep. He just loves to sleep. Well so do I but I don’t get A’s by dreaming about it DAMMIT!
I know I may be a bit out of line. I know Peter’s priorities are not the same as mine. All I want for him is to pass the class, so that we may graduate together and go about our plans in the future the way we wanted it. I know plans can change, and I just might have to change with it. Dammit now I’m the hard bitch that pushes her boyfriend to do something he wants but is too lazy for. I’m sorry I’m such a damn perfectionist. That’s my fault, like procrastination is his? Come to think of it, if he insists that this is the way that works for him, and if it has worked for the last 4 years he has been in school, then f*ck it. Do your damn thing.
WHEN?
June 15, 04 | Tuesday
DA HANGOUT?
On the job
IN COMPANY OF?
My coworker Claud and students
DA MOOD?
Suprisingly, I'm cool!
DA DETAILS?
I'm sad about my goldfish Peter dying. He died the day before yesterday of a fungal infection that I took too long to treat, so it's my fault. He suffered in the end, and I feel horrible for that! We were together for 1 year and 3 months. We're going to have to bury him, a proper burial after the previous two deaths of our goldfish whom we didn't give a burial to. I guess he'll be joining Lucy and Lipstick in fish heaven. That's altogether 3 goldfish whom we've lost; it sucks! Those guys don't last very long. We have only 3 left, and I'm wonderin if I should let them die out and then quit, or keep bringin home new ones. For now, I guess we'll just take care of what we have, which is our comet Goldie and two babies Copper and 2-Tone. I would include a pic but I'm not on my personal computer and I don't have the file. So just check back later for me to attach it. Bye now.
Later:
WHEN?
Apr. 23, 04 | Friday
DA HANGOUT?
Mr. P. Pangie's residence
IN COMPANY OF?
My boo's a-watchin TV in da livingroom
DA MOOD?
A bit anxious that I have a paper due soon and I haven't started!
DA DETAILS?
Whoa, I know I know...I'm online and a-bloggin! I needs to start on a patient case study due next Friday, but here I am playin with pictures and checkin people's sites. Hey I wanna see what I missed. I ain't gonna hang, just droppin this by:
WHEN?
Feb. 1, 04 | Sunday
DA HANGOUT?
My boyfriend's house, which is where I stay now
IN COMPANY OF?
My in-laws!
DA MOOD?
Just woke and there's so much to do!!!
DA DETAILS?
I know it's been half a year and I haven't blogged at all. Well, I'm here now, just to say I probably wouldn't be bloggin any more. I doubt that I would have time since I've chosen the field of nursing, and all my damn time will be devoted to studying thick medical-surgical books and and reviewing for the NCLEX when the day does come. The days of website designing and loggin in to my innermost thoughts on the net is over...I hope that's not the final word, but I think I've forgotten how to fix this place already! Now that I look at it, I'm surprised I had all the patience to put this site together. How did I do it? Eh...Bye now! Be back soon I hope!
WHEN?
June 18 | Wednesday
DA HANGOUT?
our store, which is half empty already
IN COMPANY OF?
my folks and two Chinese men buying this and that
DA MOOD?
sad to be selling my car and my laptop...sad sad SAD!
DA DETAILS?
Hey guys! This will be my last blog from my own beloved Compaq Presario laptop. I'm selling it tonight to this man at 7pm. WAHHHH!!! I miss it already. My Presario has kept me from boredom and many nights of loneliness. Now I have days ahead of me, when I have nothing else to do already, of nothing more to keep me occupy. I'll truly go insane! So PLEASE text me or call me at home. Tho my Presario ain't the most top-notched in design or performance, it's been great to me and my needs. WAHHHHHHHHH!!! Soon I'll be transfering my loyalties to a newer and better-looking model *pouts* but that doesn't mean I won't remember the days and nights you kept me warm, o'laptop of mine *tongue in cheek* Holler at you guys soon from somewhere else! (Looks like it's probably back to the public library.)
Here ya go: how I look before this weekend, which is when I'm going back to brunette!
WHEN?
June 6 | Friday
DA HANGOUT?
Exquisite Beauty Salon (don't go there!)
IN COMPANY OF?
Two Filipino ladies who fussed with my hair
DA MOOD?
Apprehensive
DA DETAILS?
Another hair disaster? Yesterday and the day I got it, I would have definitely said so. Goddamn! It's even lighter than what I had last August 2002! Exactly
NOT what I wanted. And I
told them so! Why wouldn't they listen!?! Why is it so damn hard to find a hairstylist who knows what they are doing and who can give sound advice? I do what the magazine articles tell me: tell them
exactly what you want and don't hesitate to ask them any step of the way what they are doing. I was persistent, I was ready to haggle, I wasn't ashamed to ask them to change my color at the last minute. I actually changed my mind about coloring my hair after all, but they wouldn't let me leave! It was more than I expected to spend, but I didn't want to lose face (there was another customer there), so I went ahead with it. I killed my hair (bleached all 24 inches of it) and then dyed it a "warm golden blonde" color, and then highlights. It appeared in the sample as a brown color, I swear, but the color didn't stick at all! I told those stylist what color I wanted to end up with, and asked them if I should choose a darker shade, but noooooo...
what the customer wants, as if
I was the one with hair experience here. Well, now I can say I do! So I'm looking like a dumb blond. I wanted medium golden brown! I was tempted to go right out and buy my own dye and do it again, but decided that I had given my hair enough thrills for the week, and will wait. So today I still sport this Rapunzel look ;) See how you like it:
I'd wanted a "sophisticated" look when I go to Guangzhou next month, and this is what I'll have? No fuckin way.
WHEN?
May 25 | Sunday
DA HANGOUT?
home after celebration after celebration
IN COMPANY OF?
the 'rents as usual
DA MOOD?
not too bad
DA DETAILS?
Well now...graduation didn't turn out so bad. I know I ranted and raved the day before, but then the next day, I bumped into one of the coordinators of the graduation, and she was appalled that I was going to graduate in absentia, since I've got
summa cum laude. I was surprised and happy (!!!) that I got the highest honors! There's only 5 of us. She talked me into walking and I did it, decided just two hours before the ceremony. What I said about none of my friends attending, it's true, none of them showed up. But I suppose it's because they don't know. These friends better forgive me if I don't know about their graduation too. So the only one there in support of me was
Peter, my sweet ole boyfriend. We were have some problems for a couple of days before graduation, that's why I was feeling all crappy and depressed, on top of it all. But we sorted it out two hours before the commencement exercises, and though he didn't think I was going to walk, he managed to surprise me with flowers at the last minute. My good friend
Eva graduated with high honors!!! Magna cum laude! Way to go, sexy! Way to go all!!! Thank yous to all those who wished me congratulations, I will remember you.
WHEN?
May 23 | Friday
DA HANGOUT?
seems to be my room in the last 3 days
IN COMPANY OF?
nobody and I'm sick of it
DA MOOD?
depressed
DA DETAILS?
My mood is hitting the dumps again. I thought I believed it when I tell people I didn't want to attend my graduation because I didn't need the recognition, because it's only an AA, because it's no big deal, because my parents won't be there and I would only have a few friends there behind me. Now, sitting in my bedroom, with graduation tomorrow, I long to be walking with them, to be normal enough, at least, to receive my diploma with the rest of them. And though I say I worked for those A's for myself and my own satisfaction, now I want to at least show the island my efforts even if I'm not the best. It hurts to think that because I won't be walking with the rest of them, I won't be remembered for my achievements on that day either. I expect it only from those closest to me, of course, but lately there doesn't seem to be many close to me. People can be so close and so far away. I brought it all to myself??? By not attending the commencement exercises doesn't mean I'm pretending my AA doesn't exist. But maybe people see it that way.
There is one person who always seems to come through when I feel the worst. Though he's not the one I like to articulate with the most, he's always been able to make me laugh. He's also the sweetest when, even if he's broke, he'll come up with a small gift for you on special occasions. Thank you,
Jason, for the graduation gift. It means a lot to me, especially at this time.
I hate feeling this crap, like nobody cares when I know they probably do. Graduation's not even over yet so how can I say nobody will remember me? Maybe I need a shrink.
WHEN?
Apr. 29 | Tuesday
DA HANGOUT?
my room
IN COMPANY OF?
everybody's sleeping!
DA MOOD?
nonchalant
DA DETAILS?
It's 5 o'clock in the morning and I'm back! Hehe...just toying with ya; I'm not really back, just back to blog today. Been meaning to for a while, but every time I started to, something came up. I'm up because I stayed up to 6AM yesterday doing this research paper, so my timing's all off whack. Ah, there's my friend Carmen in Hawaii MSN-messaging me. The sun's coming up, too. Ahhh...the start of a new day... ;)
WHEN?
April 1 | Tuesday
DA HANGOUT?
My house, for once
IN COMPANY OF?
no one/don't come near me!
DA MOOD?
scared
DA DETAILS?
I haven't blogged in the longest time. My life these days has been, basically: school, work, sleep at peter's, go home to shower and change, homework, and back to school. That is until
yesterday, when I really looked into the latest world breaking news about SARS, and think that
I might have it! I am
not shitting you! Since Friday night, I've been having coughs out of nowhere, and I've got a slight fever since yesterday. I haven't had the shortness of breath yet, but I have other accompanying symptoms such as runny nose and phlegm. I know those are not on the list of symptoms for SARS, but what if I got a new variation of the virus!? What could explain why I've been getting and re-getting this same flu/cold
THREE times in the last 2 months!? But I haven't travelled anywhere, nor have I come in contact with anybody who's travelled to those host-countries. Ai, I don't know. Maybe I'm just scaring myself silly, but who wouldn't when there's such an epidemic/pandemic going around. Now's a great time to be thinking of going back to China huh? I know.
WHEN?
Mar. 8 | Saturday
DA HANGOUT?
home sweet home
IN COMPANY OF?
Mama
DA MOOD?
I'm a sick coughing dog
DA DETAILS?
Hey all. Lots have happened since I last blogged. Right now I can't stop coughing; guess I caught the flu that's going around
again. Funny thing Peter hasn't caught it from me yet. Well now, where to start? I don't work at Caesar Sauna anymore but that doesn't mean I have any real spare time yet. I haven't found myself bored with nothing to do yet. Last week was so hectic, I'm glad it's over. Kimmy finally got married on Sunday. So now she's Mrs. Kimberly Dumayas. Wedding wasn't bad, though I have to say it was marred in my head since I have my issues to deal with. I always seem to have issues nowadays. I'm a walking psychopath and sicko. It's true. I say I'm going to miss my friends when I leave, but I'm not even spending more time with them before I leave. My priorities these days seem to be my school, Peter, and then my family. A
way different perspective from the one I had before, where my friends used to come first. Maybe Peter should slide down a notch, too, since he's not going to be next to me in a few months. But I really can't talk about Peter and me, since we don't know what's going to happen to 'us'. Mostly likely, we'll break up, because long distance is really not our thing. I can say it now like it's nothing, but just watch, later I'll be coming here whining and crying and pounding the keyboard. But I have to admit, to focus on the other side of it, I'm looking forward to seeing my home country again. There's going to be
so many things I haven't experienced yet; I can't wait! The big city lights, the infinite number of clubs and restaurants, the amusement park, the malls and shopping centers, the things to do! Of course there's also the overcrowdedness, the bad air, and the competition. Things are going to be very different within a couple of months. I don't know whether I should be glad or sad.
WHEN?
Feb. 23 | Sunday
DA HANGOUT?
my room
IN COMPANY OF?
the 'rents
DA MOOD?
sad
DA DETAILS?
It happened sooner than I thought. I went to work one day, all innocent, knowing not that it was going to be my last day. Last Thursday was the end of my almost 3 years of working for Caesar Sauna. It wasn't a great job to be begin with, but I'm going to miss those Chinese ladies. From them I learned much that I couldn't have if I hadn't been working there. In a way I'm relieved; I was just thinking about the stress and the little time I have left for studying and friends and Peter, since I just got myself a temporary job at the college, too. It's temporary because the Science and Math Department don't have enough funds, but yah, that's where I work now. Not a stable job, so you never know when I'll be loggin on and telling you that I'm leaving back to China. I know China won't be so bad, but the hardest part is leaving my friends, all the Western things and ways I know, and Peter. Nowadays, I've started thinking like, "I won't get to hear about anymore great American movies or news about pop singers anymore..." It's not like China is isolated from the Western culture, but it's just
not the same. Where am I going to taste Chamorro food? Where will I find Korean, Japanese, or Western restaurants everyday? There are so many things... It's actually kind of heartbreaking, but it might happen as soon as 2-3 months.
