All in all, life has become much more surreal than I ever thought it could be. I'm sure that I've seen things like my life coming, but things are just so different than just a month ago. Strange things have happened. And it's weird home much some people affect other people's lives. Like, I always think about people, and laugh at myself because I don't think they ever think or dream about me...but then I find out that some people do think about me, but that they're the people that I would never ever think about. People that I haven't seen in long whiles.
It just goes to show you that the grip that you think you have on things, well, maybe not a grip, more like a perspective, is really just relative. The things that i think are absolutely the most dire subjects are shit to other people. They're busy with their own things. And I feel that I can be happier knowing that, knowhing that i don't have to support my self on independent drama, I can help other people in theirs, and I can be happy enough being normal and not so melodramatic. Hoorah.
In about 8 hours, my dad's going into surgery, and even though it's just on his knee, it makes me nervous. Just got back from seeing Kt and Lauren and I just felt like I was drifting...on a totally unrelated note, I'm starting to miss my friend. I haven't hung out with him in a while, and I miss him. Not him-him, but a different part of him. of course I miss hanging out with him, but I miss what he used to be.
Talk to me. Start conversations. Drop the tools and say my name.