02/28/04 (9:45 PM): It's not March yet, but I don't feel like making a page for February and only have one thing on it. Not much happened in February. I went to solo and ensemble and got Superior ratings on all of my instumental and vocal ensembles. Valentine's is just like it is any other year...sucky and pointless (for me at least), but anyway, out of all of that, I'm feeling somewhat better about life. Letting go of the things that brought me down really seemed to help...even if I do miss it somewhat at times. But yeah, that's life...it goes on. I've been accepted to Muskingum College and I'm pretty sure that is where I will be heading off next fall. Which, by the way, makes me glad to get out of this place...too many bad memories...I like the idea of starting over. Well, I'm giving communion meditation tomorrow and I'm going to see Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ...so...talk/write to ya all later. Night.
03/07/04 (3:30 PM): Well, it's Sunday. This past Wednesday, I had a choir concert which I was very sick the previous day and that morning, but I made myself go anyway...didn't want to leave Will hanging in Rio. Even though I was better during singing and the concert was fairly good, I went through a moment I forgot. I saw somewhat of a ghost of my past...very painful to the heart. You know, as a person of God, of religion, you want to save as many as possible that you love, that you truly care for...but so many people think they do no wrong, that they are good enough for God. WAKE UP!!! NO ONE is good enough for God, not I, not my dad, no one. That is why Jesus died for us, so God would look over our sin. But for that to happen we must do as Jesus says and he says, "If you love me, obey all of my commands." If you accept him, you love him, if you love him, God will save you, but again, you must obey ALL his commands...you can't look at a few and decide that's what you want, you must obey all of them...and that means BAPTISM! So many people want to overlook that...why?! What harm does it do?! No, it's just another pathetic excuse for the religiously weak to not give up their ever-so satisfying sinful life. WAKE UP! There will be nothing satisfying for you when you die of your own ignorance! Your life is not for you...it was not made for you...it was made for Him. It makes me so angry, so sad, so lonely b/c the so many ppl I love decide to destroy their lives b/c of their pride...if only they knew how much I loved them...how much I know how God feels b/c of us and our sin-stained hearts...may He be merciful.
03/28/04 (12:33 PM): Well, it's Sunday...another day that is given to God...even though all days should be. A good sermon was set out today. The prodigal son...being able to come back to God even after everything you've done and after you've ignored Him. He is mericful and I hope those that I love will realize that and accept him and put away their lives of sin...it really isn't worth it. It is but one mere moment of satisfaction, then Satan leaves sorrow and anguish in your lives. And if you don't feel guilty...then you have no heart. If only so many people would understand...but they are too prideful, too egotistical, too lost. I wish I could help, but there are some out there in which I can no longer do anything for. It's really a sad thought. Well, on a lighter note, I came home to find my puppy with her ears back and head down. After I let her outside, she wouldn't come in so I snooped around the house to see what she had done. I found that the easter candy my mom got and hid in her closet had been broken into and that there were no candy eggs in it. I found 3 around the "crime scene" and I went to go get Chica. I let her in and showed her the bag, asking what it was, and she cowered away and hid from me b/c she knew she was doing something bad. So when my parents got home, I discussed it with them and they got mad at Chica and surprisingly, I found one egg hiding in the corner of our couch. From that point on, we were on an easter egg hunt, looking for the eggs she might've hid....though we later found that she did eat some...we found about 6 or 7 more and my mom said that there were twice that many in the bag to begin with. So who knows where the remaining ones are, we have to keep an eye on her now so she doesn't eat anymore. That crazy dog...the worst part is that she could die from eating that...I know from our last dog, Samson, that dogs+chocolate=pancreatic cancer. I hope she'll be okay. Well, I suppose that's all for today. I will sit at home, wondering why people have to be so cruel to themselves until I go off to practice with my worship band (Go Andy and Kuzy)! At least I got to someone....