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Chapter 13

 

 

Buffy was hungry.  At least that’s what she said.  Spike suspected it was an excuse to get them out of the cramped hotel room.  Even with a temporary truce declared between himself and Charles, tension hung thick between them.  Fueled by suspicion and a mutual need to protect Buffy from the other, left her stuck in the middle of their testosterone war. 

 

So, they went in search of food, stopping at the first diner they came across. The smell of coffee and grease assaulted them as soon as they opened the door. 

 

“Take a seat anywhere,” a waitress hollered from behind the long counter on the left side of the establishment.

 

“Thanks,” Gunn said, with a wave. 

 

Spike only saw his response out of his peripheral vision as he took in the customers sprinkled throughout the small place. There was an old couple arguing over something, a few kids probably ditching school, and a few others that at this first glance gave no indication of trouble.  He stepped to the side so Buffy could walk in front of him.

 

“Take that back booth,” Spike said barely above a whisper as she passed. 

 

She nodded as she took the lead.  Charles followed with Spike taking up the rear.  There were a few fearful glances from the other occupants as they made their way through the restaurant.  He almost smiled at the spectacle they must appear to be to the normal people of the world.  Buffy with her bright hair, over abundant make up and ripped jeans topped with a t-shirt proclaiming her love for some punk band.  Charles was in jeans, faded t-shirt with a black do-rag while Spike was as made up as Buffy without the makeup.  They made an odd trio, standing out yet in a way blending into the neighborhood around them. 

 

Charles slid into the booth across from Buffy leaving Spike with a choice as to who to sit beside.  Choosing Buffy, he sat next to her, relieved that she didn’t scoot away from him.  They were close enough to bump elbows and legs, yet she didn’t give any indication of anything more than that.  No leaning toward him, no deliberate movement so they could touch.  He wasn’t sure if he was relieved or hurt by her lack of actions. 

 

They didn’t say anything until they were given coffee and their orders for breakfast was made.  Spike leaned back against the seat, watching Buffy fill her coffee with sugar and cream. 

 

“So, let’s talk,” Gunn said, leaning on his forearms on the table with his mug held between his two large hands. 

 

“Thought we already made a deal,” Spike said.  “I call my Captain, get immunity for your buddy and then I get information to stop the bad guys.”

 

“You think it’s that easy,” Gunn laughed.  “If it was that easy you wouldn’t be needing me.”

 

“Probably not.”  Spike shrugged before taking a sip of his coffee, wincing at the bitterness of the strong brew.  “Just giving you the highlights of everything.”

 

“Why would Rico want to help?”  Buffy asked.  She squirmed in her seat a bit when both men turned their gaze to her. 

 

Without thinking, Spike squeezed her hand.  It seemed to give her strength.  Like it had in the old days when they were searching for Faith.  She sat up a little straighter.

 

“If Luke and his boss are arrested, isn’t it going to cut into his business?”

 

“Rico doesn’t deal drugs,” Gunn said.  He rubbed his eyes.  “His brother is serving life because of drugs.”

 

“Whoa, I’m confused,” Spike interrupted.  “I don’t think I’m getting the connection.”  He stopped when the waitress appeared with their breakfast.  After the usual passing of salt and pepper he continued, “Okay, Buffy says you know the murdered guy, who was a member of the gang you used to run, Rico was your second hand man, yet you and Rico never dealt in the drugs.  So, why would this guy, does he have a name by the way, be doing drugs?”

 

“Long speech dawg,” Gunn replied with a laugh.

 

Even Buffy giggled, which made Spike, smiled.  “Sorry, things have been a little crazy in the last week.  Makes connecting the dots a little hard.”

 

He didn’t add that the shared secret language of lovers and best friends between Buffy and Gunn made following their conversation difficult.  He was jealous.  Buffy and he never had the time to get that close.  They always spelled everything out in careful preciseness whether they were sharing dinner or fighting.  He wondered if they would ever be that comfortable with each other or if time would reveal that no matter how much love existed between them they weren’t going to be soul mates.  He shook his head as a picture of Fred came to his mind.  It wasn’t right for him to jealous.  Not while Fred wore his ring.

 

 “Let me lay this out for you some,” Gunn said, after taking a bite of his eggs.  He waved his fork.  “Where I grew up you couldn’t survive unless you were a part of a gang.  If you were a loner then you were targeted.  Somewhere along the way the guys I hung out with formed our own gang.  We became tough to the world, got into trouble, drinking, stealing, vandalism, but never the hardcore stuff.”

 

“But not everyone had the same ideals that you did?”  Spike filled in as he started to see a little of what Buffy saw in this man.  Charles was a survivor.  He would do what he had to do, even commit a crime in to stay alive, but underneath he was a good person.  They were two of a kind.  He put his fork down unable to eat in the knowledge that maybe without him they could have made a go of it.  “Like this kid who went to work for Luke?”

 

“His name was Manuel.”  Buffy interjected.  “He was nineteen.”

 

“How did you find out all of this?”  Spike asked.

 

“I read that in the paper,” Buffy said.  “It was how I knew to call Charles.  They found his body dumped in an alley next to the apartment building where he lived.  He already had a record and the article mentioned his association to the gang.”

 

“The dots have connected,” Spike said, picking up his coffee cup again.  It was a circle.  Coincidences leading them to this spot in time.  Funny how his life kept revolving around the girl, no woman, next to him.  As if, she was the sun that kept him alive.  His Sunshine.  “Maybe it’s a good thing that you did go to Seattle,” it was said with reluctance, but it was truth.  “If you hadn’t then we wouldn’t have this chance to right a wrong.”

 

“Here, here,” Gunn said, lifting his coffee cup.

 

Buffy hesitated, staring at him with wide eyes, but soon she lifted her cup, too.  They clanked together as if ringing in a new era.

 

~~~~~

 

Sitting in the car next to Charles, Buffy watched Spike standing at the public phone on a busy street corner.  She was hoping everything would go okay.  If it did then they would try to find Rico.  Maybe all of this would be over today and she could go back to her life.  Without Spike.  Her eyes closed as her heart hurt at the thought of not seeing him again.

 

“What’s the matter?”  Charles asked.

 

“Nothing.”

 

“Please girl.  Who are you talking to?”

 

She smiled in spite of herself.  “Spike.”

 

“Always comes back to him, doesn’t it?”

 

Knotting her hands together in her lap, she couldn’t answer.  It was true.

 

Charles ran a hand down her hair before pulling her close to him.  It was comfortable, warm, but not passionate.  None of the tingling feelings she felt even being close to Spike.  It wasn’t fair.

 

“From what I can tell, the two of you need to get past all this bullshit between you and get back to being together.”

 

“He’s engaged.”

 

“Hey, that’s part of the bullshit I’m talking about.  The way I see it this Fred chick had to know Spike was still hung up on you.  She decided to accept his ring anyway.”

 

“She’s been in love with him for years,’ Buffy mumbled.  “She was hoping that he would love her back.”

 

“She tell you this?”

 

“She didn’t have to,” Buffy looked up.  Spike was still on the phone.  “It’s in the way she looks at him.  Such longing and hope.”

 

“Yeah, longing and hope that he’s the one.  Come on,  Buffy, do you still seriously think she believes that they’re meant to be?  Not with yours and Spike’s history.”

 

“We only spent a week together before I went to Seattle,” Buffy said. ”Then it was when one of us had some time to travel, a lot of long phone calls and emails.” She smiled wistfully.  “It doesn’t feel like history,” she shrugged because that wasn’t the truth either.  It seemed like Spike was a part of her and had been since the day he found her.

 

“And shared things most couples don’t in a lifetime.”

 

That much was true.  They knew each other’s deepest fears, hopes, weaknesses and strengths.  When they didn’t have this wall between them, they moved in harmony, able to laugh and cry together.  How did they go so wrong?

 

Spike was walking toward them.  Buffy tensed and the arm from her shoulders disappeared, but not before Gunn whispered in her ear.

 

“He’s yours.  Take him back.”

 

Spike climbed into the car.  “Captain Roberts is going to the DA’s office to try and work out a deal.  He’s in agreement.”  He started the car, pulling out into traffic.  “Where do I find Rico?”

 

“Head south,” Charles said. 

 

Buffy kept thinking about Spike and every moment she could remember of them being together trying to decide what she really wanted to do.  The car bounced in a pothole bringing her back to the moment.  She swallowed as she recognized an old building housing a grocery.  Once a long time ago, she’d been in this neighborhood and her head swam in frightful memories as they continued.

 

The sun was bouncing off the concrete, reflecting on the walls of the broken down warehouses and buildings creating a heat to rival any oven.  A trickle of sweat rolled down Buffy’s back while a chill racked her body.  The scent of male bodies tickled her nose.  And the old leather seats of the car creaked when she shifted looking for a respite from the sensations bombarding her every senses.   A small moan stuck in her throat even as logic warred with her fears.  She wanted to scream, to get out of that car before she lost her mind. 

 

“No no no no,” Buffy whispered.  The knowledge that she was safe with the men she trusted exploded as the blocked all else from her mind.  Spike slowed the car as her protest grew louder.  He reached for her hand and all she could see was her kidnapper coming to drag her into her prison.  “Not again,” she moaned.  Scrambling over Charles she tried to pull herself out the open window.  Hands dragged her back against a hard chest while other hands wrapped around her legs.

 

How?  When?  It was happening again.  Except there were two monsters this time.  Voices gargled together as she fought their comforting tones.  Not this time.  She would die before she would let it happen.  She left a long scratch on the arm wrapped tight under her breast.  He yelled at her to stop but it was enough to loosen the grip of the new one so she could kick him in the face. 

 

“Buffy, stop it.  It’s Spike.”

 

“Liar,” she screeched.  “Let me go.”  She twisted, hitting her head on the steering wheel.  Stars danced in front of her eyes.  It gave them the advantage.  Once again she was held down.  A hand raced over her bottom and she wanted to puke as the hand grabbed her between her knees.  “Please don’t,” she begged. 

 

She was pulled back on the seat but she managed to get to her knees.  Hands grabbed her face, forcing her to look her tormentor in the face.  She froze.

 

“Buffy, you’re safe.  Baby, I’m not going to let anyone hurt you.”

 

Her body went limp as she stared into blue eyes that haunted her every dream.  Waking or sleeping. 

 

“It was here,” she mumbled.

 

“I know, I know.”  He held his arms out and she went into them.  In to the security they represented.  She poured out her fear as the days came to life in a way they hadn’t in years.  Sobs wracked her body.  She was rocked.  Kisses planted on her cheek, neck and ear as he poured his love out to her.  Right and wrong was forgotten as she clung to her avenging angel.  This was where she belonged.  He understood her, was able to banish her demons, and give her hope. 

 

Wrapping arms around his neck, she struggled to get closer to his body.  She separated her legs to get him between them.  All of her pain, loneliness, fears and hopes poured out into tears she shed on his neck. 

 

“Don’t leave me, please,” Buffy begged. 

 

There wasn’t any answer, and she took a deep breath, trying to find the courage to leave his embrace.  Footsteps outside the car solved her dilemma.  She was thrust out his arms as Spike pushed her back to the seat.  She wiped tears from her eyes so that she could see.

 

Four men with guns surrounded the car.




to be continued...


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