Personality development is the developing a personality cult so as to create a strong positive impression about self with the targeted group, or in general; and more pertinent aspect of such personality is to maintain and prove in a long run.
The term ‘personality’ is derived from the Latin word persona, meaning the mask which the actors wore on the Greek and Roman stage to distinguish their roles and amplify their voices. Why should the mask or outward appearance be used to designate something so essentially inward as personality? Precisely because it is a convenient symbol with which to mark off the individuality of or difference between one man and another.
The three principal raw materials of personality – physique, intelligence and temperament – are determined both by heredity and by conditions subsequent to birth.
The experiences that an individual has during the course of his life contribute in a large number of ways to the formation and development of his personality.
The interaction between the individual’s heredity and environment gives rise to what are known as the traits of his personality. Some examples of traits are cleanliness, honesty, cheerfulness, miserliness, irresponsibility.
A trait that derives its meaning from being related to a specific thing, person or idea is known as an attitude.
We define personality as the sum total of the man or woman, as he or she impresses other men and women.
We must learn what part personality plays in the three main areas of human life activities: love and marriage, career, and social relations.
According to Freud, the personality is a trinity consisting of id, ego and superego. The id is a reservoir of psychic energy and the source of the human instincts. It furnishes the power that sustains a person’s activities. The ego is a special part of the id which keeps the individual in touch with the outside world, and finds outlets for the expression of his instincts. The superego is a kind of moral censor which passes judgment on the individual’s strivings according to the standards which he has acquired from his parents. It makes him feel guilty when he goes against those standards, and proud of himself when he lives up to them.
According to Jung, the personality consists of six parts: the ego, the personal unconscious, the collective unconscious, the persona, the anima, and the shadow.
The ego requires little explanation. It is what is more generally known as the conscious mind. It is made up of conscious perceptions, memories, thoughts and feelings. The personal unconscious consists of experiences which have been repressed or forgotten, but which can under certain circumstances be recalled. The collective unconscious is a storehouse of ancestral memories which is common to the whole race. The personal is that side of ourselves which we choose to display to society. The personal is thus a mask which often hides the true nature of the personality. The anima is the feminine side of a man’s personality. Its counterpart is the masculine side of a woman’s personality, which is known as the animus. The shadow is the animal side of man’s nature. In Jung’s view the personality looks not only backwards to its racial past, but also forwards to a goal, which is the development of a unified whole known as the self. The self or psyche, according to Jung, has four basic functions, which are present in every individual. These are thought, feeling, sensation and intuition. Thought seeks to understand the world on the basis of a true-false evaluation; feeling apprehends it on the basis of a pleasant-unpleasant evaluation; sensation perceives things through the senses; intuition perceives them through an inner awareness.
Jung says that the personality reveals two attitudes. They are introversion and extraversion. The introvert is influenced by what he finds within himself. The extravert takes his bearings from what lies outside himself.
The essence of Adler’s theory of personality is the doctrine of a creative self, which asserts that man makes his own personality out of the raw materials of heredity and experience. Adler’s conception of the nature of personality thus coincides with the popular idea that man can be the master, and not the victim, of his fate.
Alder says that the individual’s style of life or law of movement is an expression of his total personality. The style of life is the individual’s characteristic way of reacting to the situations that confront him in life.
To Freud’s basic scheme of id, ego and superego Horney has added the concept of what she calls the ‘idealized image’. This is the mental picture that a person has of himself as he would like to be. A man who is a failure will picture himself as a success.
It is a face-saving device which enables the individual to retain a good opinion of himself in spite of evidence to the contrary.
Although Horney regarded the idealized image as a flight from reality, this need not always be the case. It can have the positive value of serving as an incentive. Our style of life, to use Adler’s term, becomes the striving of constructive imagination to work itself out in some concrete objective which forms the unique contribution of our personality to the welfare of humanity.
Horney has suggested that people are motivated by two basic drives: the need of security and the need of satisfaction.
An interesting and novel point of view on the dynamics of personality has been put forward by Fromm. He considers that man’s activities can be understood as the expression of a conflict between the need of freedom and the fear of it.
The result has been, according to Fromm,.that men are actually willing to give up their freedom in order to regain their security.
Alder has shown us the way to fulfillment in this respect by stressing that love and marriage are one of the individual’s main life tasks. He even goes so far as to say that a person who is adequately adjusted in this respect and in respect of his work and social life can never fall a victim to neurotic illness.
The atmosphere of our home is inevitably a vital factor in the development of our personality.
As result of his studies of human being Kretschmer concluded that there is a definite relation between physical and temperamental characteristics, though he makes it clear that in the majority of people temperament and physique are a blend rather than a fixed category of the types he describes.
Our adult personality shows the effects of the kind of things that happen to us as children.
What strikes us as unique in any particular society is the outcome of the personality traits acquired by the members of that society in childhood.
Another interesting classification may be made on the basis of Freud’s division of the personality into ego, superego and id. The ego we can characterize briefly by saying that it represents reason. The superego is the voice of conscience. Such a person is naturally full of conscientious scruples and high-minded to the point of idealism. There is some resemblance here with Jung’s intuition types, who are guided by their convictions. To the superego-personality morality is the most important thing, whereas to the ego-personality the most important thing is truth. To the id-personality, on the other hand, the most important thing is pleasure.
The value of sharing mutual interests has been proved in the psychological studies of marriage. There is much that married couples and those contemplating marriage can learn from the experiences of happily married husbands and wives. Reports from the latter continually emphasize the value of shared interests for the contribution they make to the stability of their union. As Dr.Wilhelm Stkel has put it, ‘The family life is the grammar school of love.’ We learn – or should learn – the attitudes that favour success in marriage by noting our own parents displaying them towards each other. We acquire our own potential behaviour in marriage by copying the example that was set before us in childhood by the marriage of our parents.
What are the personality factors upon which the happiness of a marriage depends? This is a question which has been fairly well studied by psychologists. Some of the conclusions that they have reached are:
1, A couple who can share common interests have a firm basis for their marriage.
2. The ability to co-operate is a basic requirement for marital success.
3. Emotional maturity, based on a happy home life in childhood, is an invaluable asset.
If you truly want to be a creative person, you will follow your own inclinations. You cannot create art, literature, or new ideas if you don not have the courage to be different. Almost every talented person has had to see his or her work through to completion against the criticism of others.
A direct relationship between my maturing assertiveness and my creativity.
The difference between the passive and the aggressive person is a matter of timing. The assertive person gets fed up rather quickly when being taken advantage of. The unassertive person rebels too late, after suffering lots of abuse, but eventually rebels just the same.
Passive people are dominated because they allow it.
Almost all passive suffer from one fear or another. Without fear they would all be giants. The correction of lack of assertiveness is therefore directly tied to becoming more fearless. The equation goes something like this: as fear diminishes, assertion increases.
Interests and values do not remain detached or private. They get integrated, shared, and generalized. One value serves and is served by another, and with them forms a system of values, a total life.
One of the most powerful emotions disturbing our mental tranquility is hatred. The antidote is compassion.
The common factor among all religions is that, whatever the philosophical differences between them, they are primarily concerned with helping their followers become better human beings. Consequently, all religions encourage the practice of kindness, generosity and concern for others.
The greatest fear you may have is the fear of disapproval. You were taught to think that rejection actually hurts and that you must be positively upset if you are rejected. Furthermore, you were taught that rejection proved something: that you were worthless, or why else would someone reject you?
The degree of a person’s success in life is commensurate with the degree of will-power he has attained.
n Imp. Points for an Ultimate Personality:
4. Trustworthy, High integrity and Responsibility.
5. Knowledge, in depth.
7. Effective Communication & Efficiency.
8. Economic independence.
9. Morality / Character.
10. Being beneficial / advantageous.
Strong negative aspects to spoil personality:
· Hurting attitude.
· Useless approach.
· Non-beneficial communication.
· Untrustworthy, Irresponsible, Lack of integrity.
· Below average performance.
· Powerless egoism.
· Financial indiscipline.
· Uncontrolled burst of negative emotions.
Factors for Personality Improvement
1. Pleasing Physical Presentation.
2. Body Language.
4. Maturity in Socio-Cultural Values.
5. Beneficial Interactions
6. Grasping & Understanding circumstances and environment.
8. Outwitting Defensive Smartness.
9. Concentration and Devotion in duties with (developed) liking/interest.
10. Taking care with responsibility as if own.
11. Accountable action without attracting negative reaction.
12. Will to achieve.
13. Convinced stand and inner-strength to withstand.
14. Analytical decision of choosing the best suitable of all the available practical alternatives with maturity and in the interest of purpose.
15. Risk taking with accountability for calculations.
16. Maturity of values.
17. Convincing nature.
18. Make them to dance to your tune without their knowledge.
19. Speak to them the language they understand.
20. Make them to realize your positive abilities without your involvement.
21. Be the best for good and worst for the bad in managing.
22. Do not react but act sensibly.
23. Don’t suppress emotions, but eradicate them with positive thinking.
24. Yoga & Meditation.
2. Growth/improvement/Solving oriented Positive thinking.
3. Helping tendency.
4. Zeal to grow.
5. Sincerity, integrity and gratitude.
6. Concentration and devotion.
7. Awareness and Alertness.
10. Not hurting attitude
11. Interest in clean and neat appearance.
12. Command over language
13. Responsible output.
14. Accountable actions.
15. Utilizing Time Preciously.
The four aspects influencing personality are:
Physical, Social, Psychological and Philosophical.
Physical personality depends upon pleasing personality indirectly supported by health, strength and withstanding capacity.
Social personality’s main factors are: social values, communication skill, attitude and economic independence especially in relation to wealth.
Psychological personality is in tune with personal values, approach, thinking pattern, emotional management and influenced by knowledge, intelligence and smartness.
Philosophical personality is on account of maturity of values.
Main factors for developing a strong personality in social environment:
1. Pleasing appearance.
2. Beneficial communication.
3. Adapting and adhering to social values in interactions.
4. Developing confidence of
(a) Sincerity, integrity and trust.
(b) Completing duties, fulfilling responsibilities in time.
(c) Economic independence, but not being miser.
5. Additional spices for the best impression:
(a) Awareness and alertness.
(b) Useful application of: knowledge in depth, positive intelligence and defensive smartness.
(c) Self-Confidence, Initiative, dynamism, leadership qualities, will-power and self-discipline.
(d) Adaptive to moral values.
Requisites for personality development in social context are in the order of: (1) Intelligence; (2) killing smartness; (3) wealth; (4) character; (5) knowledge. Whereas the requisites of personality development for self improvement: (1) Character; (2) Wealth; (3) knowledge; (4) Intelligence; (5) Defending Smartness.
Personality Development builds up certain characteristics which help to gain for himself, his family, his unit and society. The gain may be of materialistic or non-materialistic and direct, or indirect. Your bringing up values in others brings gains for them which in turn bring gains indirectly to you. Many a times we first try for non-materialistic gains like popularity and good-will, which we encash it for more wealth (materialistic) later on; this is how one’s personality helps to gain materialistic advantage thro’ non-materialistic benefits.
Personality is of two types, viz: in-built personality and out-ward personality. In-built personality refers to one’s inner strength on account of maturity and morality which develops a strong self-confidence in one’s attitudes and approaches. Out-ward personality depends upon one’s potentiality of creating a strong impression with others. Out-ward personality helps to achieve materialistic confidence and in-built personality helps to attain moral confidence.
There are certain definite techniques which can be applied to the improvement of your personality in the framework of the social setting described above. If you want to practice these techniques you must first learn what they are:
1. Concentrate on one thing at a time.
2. Understand how you came to be what you are.
3. Imagine yourself becoming what you want to be.
4. Suggest to yourself that you can be what you imagine.
5. Act the part you want to play in life.
These are general principles of habit formation that can be applied to the various habits that go to make up your personality.
1. Concentrate on one thing at a time. Personality is the sum total of our habits, physical, mental and emotional. Therefore, the problem of improving it needs to be broken down into the specific habits that require cultivation. These should be tackled one at a time.
Let us assume that you accept this advice and that you choose to concentrate on improving your confidence. This is not, of course, the only choice you could make. You are not limited to this one trait but can, if wish, work on any other.
For example, do you remain cool in emergencies? Do you avoid blaming others when things go wrong? Can you always be depended upon to do what you say you will do? Do you go out of your way cheerfully to help others? Do you have reasonable faith in humanity? Do you show an interest in the interests of others? Do you take an active part in any organizations to which you belong?
According to the way in which you answer these and other similar questions that you might ask yourself, you will want to aim at developing poise, acceptance of responsibility, reliability, helpfulness, trust, other-interest, co-cooperativeness, and so on.
But we will assume that you have selected confidence as the trait you want to develop. We make this assumption for several reasons: (a) many people who feel that they need to improve their personality at all feel that they could do with a bit more confidence; (b) Confidence is basic to success in practically all human activities; (c) To cultivate confidence may go a long way towards self-improvement in other traits besides.
2. Understand how you came to be what you are. Develop a fuller understanding of your own motives. Study your childhood experiences to discover the causes of the trouble. Revive the original memories and re-evaluate them in the light of mature adult experience. ‘The improvement of personality,’ says Dr.Roback, ‘hinges on insight.’
Lack of confidence may be caused by being born to parents who themselves lack confidence; having a characteristic which makes one feel different from other people; feeling unloved and unwanted in childhood, being over-protected, spoilt or pampered as a child by one’s parents; undergoing psychic traumas or emotional shocks in childhood, such as being deprived of one or both parents; and experiencing a mental conflict which leads to the repression of a strong desire.
To findout the reason, then, spend a few minutes regularly each day thinking about the events of your past life and reliving the feelings which you had at the time. Study your childhood memories with particular reference to any of the typical causes listed above. When you recall an event or situation which helps you to see why you lack confidence, try to recall how you felt at the time when it occurred. Find some way of ‘working off’ your feelings in direct, useful physical activity, e.g, digging the garden chopping wood, etc.
Go over each experience again and again in your mind, working off the emotions connected with it, until you can think about it without feeling upset by it.
The purpose of this exercise is to enable you to gain insight into the reasons why you lack confidence, and to release the repressed emotions which lie at the root of this symptom. If you can succeed in accomplishing this task, you will have gained a valuable piece of self-knowledge.
Imagine yourself becoming what you want to be. Don’t try to overcome your lack of confidence merely by an effort of will. As well as relying upon will-power use the power of imagination. Imagination and will together are more effective than either alone. In your mind’s eye see a picture of yourself as you would like to be. Create a mental picture of yourself plus the desired change. Then use your will-power to make the mental picture a reality.
For example, in your mind’s eye see yourself acting with confidence in your social life. Imagine yourself exchanging opinions with the people you meet and taking an active interest in their interests. See yourself replying confidently when the boss speaks to you, picture yourself dating that girl who attracts you. Then get in there and really do it.
The law of reversed effort is invoked by a conflict between will and imagination. For example, you will yourself to accomplish something, but your imagination dwells on thoughts of failure. The result is that you fail. The solution of the problem is to get will and imagination working together, as suggested above. When you will yourself to do something, you should also picture yourself succeeding.
1. Suggest to yourself that you can be what you imagine. Tell yourself that you can become what you want to be. Suggest to yourself that you will no longer be afraid of the memories of the past. Affirm to yourself, at frequent intervals, quietly but forecully, whatever change you desire. In other words, you can replace fear by confidence with the help of autosuggestion.
For this purpose, you should on retiring, on awakening and at any other convenient time repeat to yourself:’ Hour by hour and day by day, I’m gaining confidence in every way.” The key work is ‘confidence’, and the affirmation may even be shortened to this. That is, you can simply repeat the word ‘confidence’ to yourself. You can do this instead of saying the full affirmation or after you have said it. When saying the full affirmation you can prevent your mind wandering by placing a special stress on the key word.
2. Act the part you want to play. Act as if the desired change in yourself had already taken place.
Be interested in what other people are saying. A man said: ‘I find that being in company can be distressing. I have a feeling that people are not interested in what I am saying.’ Therefore, if you want to put people at their ease, be as interested in them as you expect them to be in you. Show a genuine interest in other people. Talk about the things that interest them.
Rejoice with others in their good fortune. Show appreciation of others. Speak well of people. Avoid making them feel inferior. Eliminate disapproval and adverse criticism.
Cultivate the habit of a friendly smile. Smile, darn you, smile, as the song says. Cultivate a sense of humour. Listen with sympathy and interest to what others have to say. ‘A little sympathy for others will change the personality,’ promises Dr.Roback.
Be enthusiastic. ‘A face lighted up with enthusiasm,’ says Dr.Roback, ‘will always atone for a poor complexion, a too large nose, a too wider mouth, or too small eyes.’
Emotions like fear or timidity cannot be altered directly by an effort of will, but we can control their outward expression. If you want to appear self confident, act as though you were self-confident. Carry out the bodily movements appropriate to the emotion you wish to cultivate. As we read in Hamlet, ‘Assume a virtue though you have it not.’
For example, a woman who lacked self-confidence said:’I don’t confide to people at large the way I really fee, and I am constantly being told how people envy my smart appearance and air of confidence. As a result I have felt more confident, so that I am beginning to wonder whether I have not imagined the embarrassment.’
Finally, a word about character: Character is the moral aspect of personality. For example, red hair is a trait of personality, but honesty is a trait of character. Other examples of character traits are: consideration for others, self-denial, conscientiousness, persistence, reliability, a sense of responsibility, self-respect, obedience to a worthy authority, reverence, self-control, courage, industriousness, initiative, consistency, loyalty, unselfishness, and so on.
A remarkable feature of character is its uniformity. For example, if a man is rude to one person who irritates him, his rudeness to another person who does the same thing hardly surprises us. We expect a woman who is conscientious in her household duties to be equally conscientious if she is appointed secretary of Mothers’ Union. A child who does neat and accurate homework in French can usually be relied upon to do the same thing in Maths.
Character cannot be changed radically once childhood has been left behind. The basis of character is laid down in the first five years of life, and thereafter it can only be added to.
Two important influences contribute to moulding the character of the individual in childhood. In the first place, character is acquired through unconscious imitation. In other words, the child takes over the early standards of thought and conduct set for him by his parents. This is the most important and decisive element in the formation of character. It leads to the development of the superego, conscience or moral self.
The second important influence that contributes to the moulding of character is the identifications which the child makes not only with his parents but also with other personas in authority, such as teachers and ministers of religion. In particular, there is usually a strong identification between the individual and the parent of the same sex. In other words, the boy normally wants to grow up to be a man like Dad, while the girl takes her mother as her ideal.
These considerations lead to a practical conclusion that provides the answer to the question of character development. We should associate ourselves with people who posses those traits that we regard as making up a sound character in the highest and broadest sense of the term. By this means we provide ourselves with a pattern upon which we can model the additions that we want to make to the basic character that was formed by our experiences in the first five years of life.
Main factors for developing a strong personality in working field:
1. Sincerity, integrity and trust.
2. Awareness, alertness and grasping capacity.
3. Beneficial communication skill.
4. Useful application of required knowledge in depth, positive intelligence and defensive smartness.
5. Non dependence of economic condition other than for rightful privileges.
6. Completing duties and fulfilling responsibilities in time and absolute accountability.
7. Pleasing appearance with good health.
8. Social interactions in tune with institutional decorum.
9. Sensible thinking inspite of emotionally charged, or embarrassing, circumstances.
10. Dynamism in positive approaches, initiative in new skills and adaptive to institutional policies.
11. Being in tune with changing times; especially so with changing technologies in the respective line.
12. Not to be with:
(1) Creating helplessness, self satisfaction at others’ cost, egoism, sadism, criticism, putting blame on others to escape, irritating communication, untrustworthiness.
(2) Laziness, lethargic attitude, falling into helplessness, unusual attitude, useless/boom-ranging approaches, irresponsibility, ignorance, borrowings, unhygienic/disliking appearance.
Your success at work, like your happiness in marriage, depends upon the kind of person you are. Psychologists have discovered what personality traits matter to you in your career. By comparing groups of successful and unsuccessful men they have pinpointed the causes of success and failure.
In one such study the success achieved by each member of a group of 730 gifted men was assessed independently by three experienced persons. ‘Success’ was defined not in terms of money, but as the extent to which each man had made use of his superior intellectual gifts. The personalities of the 150 men judged to be the most successful were then compared with the personalities of the 150 men judged to be the least successful.
Where the two groups were found to differ most was in respect of the following four personality traits:
1.Persistance in the accomplishment of ends.
2. Integration towards goals, as contrasted with drifting.
4. Freedom from inferiority feelings.
In other words, the most successful men were the most persistent, the most purposeful, the most self-confident, and the least troubled by inferiority feelings. The least successful were the least persistent, the most inclined to drift, the least self-confident, and the most troubled by inferiority feelings. The conclusion is inescapable: persistence, purposefulness, self-confidence, and freedom from inferiority feelings are important for success, even if they are not the direct causes of it.
These conclusions have been confirmed by another investigator who studied the most outstanding figures in history. From a list of 1000 of the world’s most eminent men she rated 100 on various aspects of personality. The results of this study showed that the most outstanding traits of these men were:
1.Persistence of motive and effort.
2.Confidence in their abilities.
3.Strength or force of character.
We note a close correspondence between this list and that given above. In fact, two qualities are the same in both lists, while the second one in the first list is related to the remaining one in the second list. These and the results of other studies in this field suggest the possibility of reducing the personality traits essential for success in work to the following basic list:
Persistence and confidence are two outstanding traits of successful men and woman. This has been proved by psychological studies, comparing the personalities of the successful with those of the unsuccessful. It also agrees with what common sense leads us to expect.
Persistence is the attitude you display if you feel that your work is meaningful. To believe that our job is important for its own sake (quite apart from anything we can get out of it) provides the best incentive for succeeding at it. If you don’t have this feeling about your work, you should take up something else which does evoke your enthusiasm. Or you may be able to solve this problem by changing your attitude without changing your job. Employers can motivate their work people to show persistence by offering appreciation of the worker’s efforts.
Lack of confidence is usually related to buried memories dating back to childhood. The child’s experiences in his relationships with his parents affect the grown-up’s attitude work. To gain insight into exactly what is going on inside you is helpful towards giving you the means of controlling your reactions and exhibiting greater confidence in your dealings with people and things. This can be attempted with the aid of self-analysis reports of those who have used it.
Main factors for Self development:
1. Self-discipline especially against temptations.
2. Not telling lies.
3. Attainment of maturity in distinguishing good and bad, and development of discipline to do such good and will-power to stand against such bad.
4. Performance of accepted role-play with fulfilling duty, responsibility and accountability.
5. Love and gratitude.
6. Using sensibility rather than becoming emotional.
7. Listen and gather but take your own decision.
8. Don’t accept failures, but rectify mistakes in such failures.
9. Skill to do, will to achieve and thrill to help.
10. Try to create happiness around you even at your own personal cost.
11. Helping should always be motto of life without expectation in return.
12. Be selfish within such level of: don’t give away your owns if meant for fulfilling your duties.
13. Thinking should be positive so that your attitude and approaches will also be positive.
14. Learn useful knowledge, develop positive intelligence and equip with defensive smartness.
15. Time shall be managed to such optimum level either for usefulness, or for relaxation.
16. Have such hobbies so as to convert the remaining time to be useful.
17. Dependence should be a strategy to get the things done.
In other words, personality development depends on:
· Character and Conduct.
· Theory of relativity, Perceptions and Values.
· Awareness and alertness.
· Health, wealth, in-depth knowledge, positive intelligence and defensive smartness.
· Self-Confidence, Will-Power and Self-Discipline.
· Duty, responsibility and accountability.
Other Notable Points:
I.Understanding purpose and attaining the ultimate maturity, determination of aim; i.e understanding the purpose, and attaining the ultimate maturity of purpose and will and determination to achieve are the pre-requisites.
II. Acquiring requisites.
III. Aim: Satisfaction, wealth and Fame; i.e One’s purpose of developing personality is to achieve the aim of satisfaction, wealth and fame.
(1)Satisfaction (purpose oriented):- concentration, systematic approach, hard work, sensible attitude, will-power, using one’s knowledge and intelligence at the optimum level, approach to obtain benefit and utilizing it to fulfill the purpose.
Explanation: - Any work one undertakes is meant for satisfaction (either for satisfaction of self, or for the satisfaction of other). To complete the work to the satisfaction one has to plan properly, attempt the work with systematic approach and full concentration on the job. One should be prepared for the hard work with liking to do so. In doing such work, one should use one’s knowledge and intelligence to the optimum level of achieving the satisfaction with a strong will to achieve. During the process, so many hurdles, creating irritation, may happen for which one should approach, or react, sensibly and definitely not emotionally. To complete the work with any help, assistance, or support, one should approach pleasingly so as to obtain the benefit of help and using the art of utilizing such help to fulfill the purpose in time and to the extent of more than expectation.
(2)Wealth:- acquiring specialization in knowledge, approach with killing smartness, using intelligence to outwit in the competition, financial budget, planning and discipline, not to yield to temptation but taking calculated risk, savings and investing savings with better returns by avoiding gambling, earning with morality and spending usefully with purpose of betterment, sincerity, hard work, integrity and will-power.
(4) Favourable social interactions are possible by pleasing appearance beneficial communication, happy creating attitude, and mutually useful approach with maturity in social values.
(5) In-depth knowledge should be useful.
Positive intelligence should be beneficial.
Defensive smartness should be protective.
3. Criticism is the self-defensive mechanism to cover up one’s own inefficiency.
4. Not telling a lie is not wrong but it doesn’t mean to tell the truth; however, not telling truth should be for a positive aspect without absolute selfishness.
Sound planning and imagination coupled with determination and perseverance can turn any dream into reality.
There are five steps to fuller life and complete personality.
1. Healthy body
2. Healthy mind
3. Healthy thoughts
4. Will power
5. Work efficiency
Whilst, the first three are vital to a good life, the last two are vital to earning a good living. It is true that the external appearances of a person can make its personality. However the proper functioning of the nervous and the glands are even more important in the development of a complete personality. Enough the proper functioning of the thyroid glands are very important to personality development. A person whose thyroid glands produce less than sufficient thyroxin will become easily irritable his capacity to memorize decreases and so does his capacity to make decisions. If on the other hand thyroxin is produced in greater quantity then anxiety and anger will become more prominent.
Henceforth any of these above mentioned problems can be a sign that the thyroid glands are not absolutely and habits is usually the effect of the nervous systems. If a person or a child becomes violent for trivial matters then it could be suspected that the sympathetic nervous system is not functioning well.
Determination and willpower alone can make an ordinary person a giant personality. Purity of thoughts are the factors that can increase willpower and determination. If the will power has to be increased, then it is essential to be away from feelings such as jealousy, false allegations, small talks etc .
Developing a vibrant personality requires, besides outward attractiveness, an even more important quality, which is called INNER CHARM or CHARISMA. A charm that comes from within.
This INNER CHARM is the talent that shines through training and technique.
The six (6) qualities that are listed as the characteristics of great actors and actresses are:
4) INTEREST IN OTHER PEOPLE
The first step in learning how to be a more attracting and stimulating personality is to examine and evaluate your presence to daily life.
The following are the ten (10) major requirements toward the development of a FINE personality:
2) CLEANLINESS OF BOTH MIND AND BODY
4) GOOD DISPOSITION
5) OBEDIENCE TO IDEALS AND PRINCIPLES
6) HONESTY IN ALL THINGS
9) RELIGION OR SPIRITUALITY
10) GOOD HEALTH
We must learn how to make it function. We must acquire wisdom in addition to knowledge. Wisdom involves aims and purposes and ideals, which is even more than knowledge.
Wisdom involves character. Ideas and ideals are powerful determining factors in the development of personality and character.
"Knowledge and timber shouldn't be used much till they have been seasoned." says Oliver Wendell Holmes.
It is every person's inherent right to wish to advance in life's progress. Indeed, to progress constructively should be the desire and the principle urge of every man and woman's existence. Success depends greatly upon a magnetic, pleasing personality.
A personality is like the mechanical magnet. Someone has defined PERSONALITY as a balance perfection of a healthy body, an illumined mind, and controlled emotions.
That you build the personality to its fullest one must learn how to reach out and in and draw from within himself a strong unit of PERSONAL POWER. Here are the twelve (12) steps toward PERSONAL POWER :
1)RADIANT HEALTH OF BODY AND MIND
2) WILLINGNESS TO PAY THE PRICE (NOT MONEY
3) AN OPEN MIND
4) A PLEASANT BUT CONVINCING VOICE
5) A SENSE OF OBSERVATION AND IMAGINATION
6) A SENSE OF HUMOR
7) DESIRE TO EXCEL IN SERVICE
8) TACT IN DEALING WITH OTHERS
9) A SELF-CONFIDENT POINT OF VIEW..A POISED MIND
10) ABSOLUTE HONESTY IN MONEY MATTERS
11) OPTIMISTIC ENTHUSIASM
12) PERSONALITY AND WILL TO CARRY ON
A person is first observed through their physical appearance. People are likely to judge one first by their outward appearance. They form an impression of one by what they SEE before they hear one speak.
Most important of all is the silhouette beneath the outer clothes. POSTURE is the spine of an attractive figure. Develop a rhythymic walk, WHICH IS BALANCE IN MOTION, and one will develop grace in all his movements.
1. Head held high and over the middle of your shoulders.
2. Chin parallel to the floor
3. Shoulders even and pulled back a little
4. Arms resting easily at your sides with the palms turned towards your thighs
5. Feet pointing straight ahead about 4-6 inches apart
6. Pleasant composure on face
1. Head held high and over the middle of your shoulders
2. Chin parallel to the floor
3. Even steps with weight balanced on balls of feet
4. Swing arms freely in accordance with stride
5. Pleasant composure on face
1. Head held high and over the middle of your shoulders
2. Chin parallel to the floor
3. Sit well over your hips
REMEMBER *** PRACTICE MAKES PERFECTION
What is character ?
"Character is higher than intellect." says Ralph Waldo Emerson. Walter Pitkin
(American journalist) defines character by saying, "It is a web of habits which
deal with oneself, with other people, and with affairs in which the needs and
wants of people figure.
A firm character is a tightly woven web. It may be too austere for comfort, or cruel or insipid in its sense of value, but none the less it is firm. It knows what it wants and needs, and it knows how to get it."
That it is a web of habits that deal with oneself, with other people, and with affairs in which the needs and wants of people figure, we accept.
At least five different theoretical approaches address the "why" question. That is, why are there individual differences. Evolutionary Psychology emphasizes universals of human behavior and attempts to explain individual variability in terms of alternative adaptive strategies. Behavior genetic approaches analyze the variation in behavior in terms of the complex interplay between genetic and environmental influences. Systematic work in biological theorizing has emphasized the continuity of behavior across species and searches for the biological underpinnings of temperament and complex behavior. Social cognitive theories emphasize the importance of socialization and the effect of cognitive processes to create one's unique patterning of behavior. Traditional psychoanalytic techniques, although not a major area of current personality theory, did have an influence in the theories developed throughout much of the 20th century. Ability is construed as the best one can do on a particular measure in a limited time (speed test) or with unlimited time (power test). Personality measures are estimates of average performance and typically include reports of preferences and estimates of what one normally does and how one perceives oneself and is perceived by others.