Being antisocial
i was just talking to johnsons about being antisocial.. i'm not sure if technically that is spelled like 'anti social' or like 'anti-soial' but regardless, i will be spelling it like 'antisocial' for the rest of this entry. being antisocial is quite possibly the best gift anyone could possess. what could be better? having friends you say? NOPE. think about it... showering sucks... putting on clothes sucks.... talking to people about things you normally don't care about sucks... most certainly running into at least one person you hate sucks... the whole going out experience just sucks. that's why i prefer to just stay on here.. this way i can sit here with my remote controls and my comfortable chair and never move and never deal with any of that. plus, if you IM me and i don't wanna talk to you, i just x your ass. think about it, if you would have come up and talked to me when i was being social i would have had to run you over with my car, and things would have gotten messy and it just would have been unenjoyable for both of us... probably more for you, but i would have had to wash my car and evade the police, and meh. so that's all i have to say today. my antiscialness (again, i don't give a shit if that's really a word) is by choice. why? because i don't want to have to deal with people like you correcting my words and telling me i'm doing things wrong. this way i can just lounge about, content with my chair and my movies and my internet blackjack. goodnight.

gunnar
i hate gunnar larson. i must have missed the memo saying that suddenly it is cool to be 3 feet tall and albino... personally, i still don't buy it, and i still think you should shut the hell up. but HEY gunnar! good that you come to our site, and good that you comment... most people are afraid to (gays) after ross' previous behavior. see your dorky ass later.

Talking to ducks
Im trying to fucking drink here. trying to drink the fucking corona and the god damn bottle opener wont do its fucking job. on to orange twist. flogging molly tonight. plan on being bombed the whole time. anywho... i need to go drink now. goodbye.

---kate---

p.s. the corona is "skunked." i'm the only fag who cares, but it's a big deal, ok?

Roomate
Claire's been questioning me about why I haven't written for awhile so I decided to make a new blog. By the way JOHANNA YOUR CRAZY. So I got my roomate assingment a couple of days ago. His name is Paul. I called him up, he sounded nice. But he was kind of shy, when I asked him what he was brining, his only response was a fan. Which I guess would be cool cause then I'd have lots of room. He also said he's a boyscout. Not just any boy scout, and eagle scout. So I suppose if maybee I got locked out of the room or something he could whiddle me a key. Or because our room is on the 4th floor maybee he'll have some contraption like in that boy scout add on TV where they help the grandma across the big ravine that could bring me to class. When I asked him if he was going to the college gathering thing next weekend (There's a picnic on Sunday) he said THE SCIENCE FAIR, really excitedly. I mean I had been talking to the kid for like 5 minutes and he hadn't sounded excited at all then out of now where he was pumped about some science fair I knew nothing about. I'm sure he'll be nice though, maybee he's smart and can help me with homework. Or maybee he's a chemist of some sort and can brew me up some smart potions. My brother's friend had a roomate who had rage problems and always beat people up. Except this guy was really nice to him. But my bro's friend was affraid of him. At night, the roomate would stay awake and if he kicked his covers off he would come over an pull them up, tuck him in and watch him for the rest of the night. His friend would walk in and see the guy smelling his clothes. That would be creepy. Anyways I'm sure Paul will be a good guy and I hope everybody else has great roomates.

----Charlie----

FlOGGING MOLLY!
im drinking alone. why? cuz i had to go home and now i am home, alone, drinking. FLOGGING MOLLY was FUCKING AWESOME though! my favorite badn, for sure. god damn. the best night of th eusmmer. the best part about it: we do ita ll over tomorrow. YES, see you here. niiice.

Drunken Insight Continued...
Tonight is Flogging Molly. If you don't know who Flogging Molly is, you're a fucking moron. Seriously, your life is shit without Flogging Molly. Okay, here's how I will try to explain the unexplainable goodness of Flogging Molly. Think IRISH plus PUNK ROCK plus LIQUOR plus DANCING plus REALLY GOOD MUSIC and then think that that wonderful picture you have just created is shit compared to Flogging Molly. Get ready to get drunk and dance on the devil's dance floor, my friends.

I got drunk the other night and wrote my profile, which some of you have seen, and fewer of you have commented on. I believe I'm smart when I am drunk --it's that whole optomistic feeling that comes along with being drunk, so I wrote that profile, and then I read it, and realized that I'm pretty stupid, and not all that smart, and I use commas too much. But here it is, continued and updated. Thank God for alcohol. Oh and update: I was going to read a book earlier, but then Kate came over with liquor.. so close. If the following seems stupid, get drunk, and read it again...

"I wish I could write down the things I thought. The things I REALLY thought. The thoughts and emotions that are undeniably beyond words, too deep and too real for any simple word. I'd assume that's where the simile was first used. It was understood that feelings were unable to be written down directly, but maybe they'd be clearer through comparison. Similes, in my opinion, still don't do the trick. They are still created wholly by words. We have handicapped ourselves, making our only opportunity to spread our emotions through words we have made up that ironically will never be right. Everything is so clear, so true, and so pure in thought, but always so fake and gray when written down and expressed. I find myself writing down my feelings and then screaming "No, that's not what I meant, not at all what I meant... not at all." I wish I could write down the things I thought. The things I REALLY thought. That way I'd have something to write down."

*since I can't, I will continue to write bullshit for all of your enjoyment, as well as mine.*

----Claire.----

And I'm out.
kate here. going to iowa. id like to challenge claires comment on wisconsin being the most boring state ever. no you lose. iowa is far worse. sorry to matt and charlie and anyone else who goes there. be back on saturday and im looking forward to a big drunken orgy. flogging molly will kick ass but only if we can drink beer and get naked. the date is set and the plans are made: dont anyone fuck this up for me... its all i have getting me through this weekend from hell. you all enjoy the casino and the big city life of mendota, just remember that your very dear friend kate is ready to kill herself in the cornfields of iowa. goodbye for now...

Forwarded Email
To everyone I sent that stupid Bill Gates forward to:

I apologize for sending you such worthless bullshit, I truly do. I guess I was just hooked at the promise of money. True, it most likely is a scam that somebody wrote up, just seeing how long it could go on for, but there's just that question... "what if??" -- it's something that I just could not resist. What if I do get money in the mail? What if? It's kind of like God. Why not just give Him the benefit of the doubt and pass along your knowledge of the guy? I mean... He could have definitely just been made up by some gay guy who was obsessed with rainbows and nice people.. people doing good and acting for others --- but maybe not, right? what if he's real? again, what if?? i mean... why not just do it? why not just give everything the benefit of the doubt? that way, if the email is real I'll get money. And if God is real, I'll get heaven. If not, I get no money and I get no heaven, I'm just where I would have been anyway. But again... sorry for the annoying email.. just don't open the one that is with the subject of "$$$"... unless.....

my sincerest apologies,
claire

Drunken Wisconsin Results...
Well, first off, to everyone who lives in Wisconsin... I am very sorry you have to live in such a fucking boring state. jenny and ross, you still have time to go to school somewhere else... ANYWHERE else. well we didn't get very drunk and so our results may vary (but i cannot assume they will vary all that much). basically, wisconsin (prescott this time) is the worst place you could possibly imagine being. you're probably saying to yourself... "what about iraq? stuck in a fallen mine? at the cher concert in between two sweaty obese women?..." NOPE.. all of these are much better than Prescott. we have found that nothing can make wisconsin tolerable.. not even liquor -- kate went through all of her cigarettes, and that did not seem to calm the nerves one bit. frankly, nothing seemed to do the trick. kate tried smoking and sex.... jenny tried to steal some corn (god knows there's plenty of it)... and i tried yelling BIG a lot (its from Sex and the City) and giving young boys my number (i feel i have a better shot at the young, desperate ones).... and i'm pretty sure all of us had a shitty time. the mission --- project find rene's house -- was left unfinished.. which i just think made things worse... NEVER LEAVE A MISSION UNFINISHED. rene's stupid house is hard to find. but okay moving on... well not really, sorry to get your hopes up... the whole lesson here is that wisconsin sucks, no matter how many substances you use to try to mask the boredom. i guess the only way to cope with being stuck in wisconsin is suicide. i guess you could give hard core drugs a shot... a little coke and some heroine.. laced with some major pain meds -- i'm pretty sure this won't help though -- it could make the suicide a little less painful though? whatever. the fucking state left me in such a state of desperation and depression that i ended up gambling away all of my money -- i'm blaming wisconsin for my gambling problem. plus, i didn't have enough money for KFC. oh yeah and EVERYONE keeps yelling at me. WHY?? well don't worry folks, i'm gone in a week and then your lives will go back to being nice... until then i guess i will continue to make all of your lives living hell...goodnight.
--claire

i want to join the club
kate again. im feeling left out with all this talk about this "super cool" website that everyone loves so much. so, because i am such a super cool person, i have decided to join in on the fun. good for me you say? thats right. so we go to treasure island tonight ... yes, i have a gambling addiction and i probably will end up in therapy (but the first step is admitting it right?) so anyway... we go to treasure, and the chips there are cool. they are really pretty and have birds on them but the rainbow backgroud (are the indians gay?) confused me so i might have to stick to mistake lake. omg do i have add or what? big time tangent city. this guy was sitting at the table with us and he was smoking a cigar that smelt really good. then when we left to go to another table, he followed us!!! thats right, took his cigar and followed us to another table. too bad he was 40 year old man with a moustache. well, shit happens. then as we are leaving, he just so happens (coincidence? i think not) to be leaving as well. with that, he invites us back to his boat for a beer... and knowing clair (no e) and myself, we say yes. so we go to the boat and jenny steals a bottle of vodka. SCORE! claire gets drunk and i have unprotected sex with the 40 year old man with the moustache. thats right. UNPROTECTED! now guess what happened? i have ghonnaria (but i still dont know how to spell it because i havent't gotten my perscription yet). and so the night ends... me sitting at my computer all lonely and exhausted from a wild night of UNPROTECTED sex, drunk of my ass and eating a bowl of popcorn. well, thanks for letting my speak my mind... don't worry. i will be back. SPEAKING OF WHICH... anrold is running for governor of cali???? note to ross: what the fuck is this country coming to? screw minnesota... pretty soon they will have me leading the country (drinking age: 4. everyone must smoke. ghonnaria will be treatable. life will be ok again). on second though - props to arnold. good luck buddy!