When I was a child I used to hear this little ditty:
"Nobody loves me, everybody hates me,
I think I'll eat some worms."
That was sung as a child because it was funny, but many could sing it today for real.
It would sound like this:
"People are talking about me, nobody understands what I am going through.
I don't deserve this.
No one cares about what is happening to me.
No one has had it as bad as me."
A person who thinks this way has allowed self-pity to seize control of his or her mind.
It is true that self-pity may not make you to eat worms, but it surely can make you feel wormy.
Watch out for this destructive attitude.
Self-pity is a familiar mood.
Self-pity is an ever-present temptation to those who are going through an emotionally shattering experience.
Self-pity can do you far more harm than the thing that actually happens to you.
We cannot do anything about a lot of things that happen to us, but we can do something about self-pity.
We don't have to put up with self-pity!
We can get rid of it!
Self-pity is one luxury that no one can afford.
There is no way one can rebuild his or her sense of self-worth by indulging in self-pity.
Self-pity opens the door for depression.
Get rid of self-pity and you will rid yourself of one of the major causes of depression.
I read of a person's account of his father passing away.
Not many days thereafter, his mother wanted to sell her house and move into an apartment.
The next day when he talked to her she wanted to do something else.
Finally, he said to her: "These emotional swings you are experiencing are normal in view of what
you have gone through. So, don't make any major decisions while you are in these moods."
When one is going through an emotionally shattering experience, his moods will probably
change rapidly and often.
He or she may decide to do a hundred different things the same day, and may of those things
will contradict each other.
If this describes you at this time, just accept it as where you are emotionally.
Relax in God's great love and grace.
God loves you just as you are, just where you are.
God's love is utterly patient, and He knows exactly where you are in your life, and where you ought to be.
Self-pity mars our relationship with others.
The person who is forever going over and over things that he regrets about himself will not be able
to maintain his friendships.
This is not surprising because a self-pitier is unattractive.
People avoid the company of a person who is always complaining.
Self-pity is the one attention-getter that soon wears out the other person attention.
Self-pity stops your progress to being a healthy and mature individual.
Allow self-pity to take over an all growth and achievement comes to a standstill.
When you are doing nothing sitting on the sidelines and feeling sorry for yourself -- that is exactly
what is happening good for you - nothing!
Self-pity is not the way to make things better.
So, get off the bench and do something good for yourself.
Ask yourself if self-pity has ever done anything good for you?
How Can One Get Rid Of Self-pity!
Spot It Quickly, And See It For What It Is!
Sooner or later, selfishness brings us to a state-of-mind of self-pity.
Self-pity is simply focusing on one's miserable self.
It is seeing everything that is wrong, and not seeing anything that is right.
There is no doubt about it -- self-pity is pure selfishness.
Use your mental power to choose something better than self-pity.
There is a story about a young football star who mother died just a couple of days before a big game.
The coach didn't know what he was going to do.
This young man was his quarterback and also was his best player.
It was the game that would decide the championship.
The coach decided that he would leave the decision up to the young man as to whether
he would play or not.
No one expected the young man to show up for the game.
Game-time came and the teams ran out on the field and the young star was with them.
While the teams went through their pre-game drills, the young football star went over to the stands.
A couple of rows up was an empty seat; it was draped in black.
The young man stood and looked at the empty seat and said, "Mother, I'm playing this game for you."
Then, he went out and played better than he had ever played, and led his team to victory and to the championship.
This story demonstrates the fact that no matter what happens to us, we still choose how we are going to react.
That young man could have sat down and felt sorry for himself.
He could have been the object of everyone's sympathy.
He could have had made them all so sorry that it could have affected the entire team.
Oh, yes, he hurt!
We hurt when bad things happen to us.
But he refused to mix the hurt with the defeating ingredient of self-pity.
Make self-pity an unwelcome guest in your mind.
Avail Yourself Of Physical Exercise.
There is tremendous value in physical exercise.
Jesus warned in John 16:33: " In this world ye shall have tribulation..."
He never suggested that was the slightest possibility that one could pass through life
without feeling the sting of disappointment or without experiencing the sharp knife of emotional hurt.
Focus All Your Attention On What You Have, Not On What You Have Lost!
Too may people are beaten because they center on what they lack, on their limitation, and their losses.
Think on these three things and you'll feel sorry for yourself every time.
Take inventory of what you have and of the blessings you have received - life, health, food, etc.,
Every Christian can be forever grateful for the eternal life that we have in Christ,
and the many blessings of God we receive every day.
None of Which we could ever deserve.
Be a victor over circumstances, not a victim!
With God's help we can always be victorious!
"In all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us." (Romans 8:37)
It is not what we have lost that counts; it is what we have that counts!
It is not what seems impossible; it is that with God all things are possible!
That is what makes the difference.
Don't be concerned about what you can't do; look at what you can do!
Stand Up To Life! Move Ahead!
Give Yourself In Service To Others!
There are always a lot of other people you can fell sorry for instead of yourself.
Since self-pity is a direct result of self-centeredness, there is no better cure for selfishness
than giving yourself in service to others.
Remember the time Paul and Silas were in jail in Phillipi.
It was a cruel and unjust punishment for them.
When they were released from their smelly dungeon, they went to the house of Lydia
to meet with the other Christians.
If we had been subjected to what they experienced, we probably would have said,
"Give me something to eat." "Send for a doctor." Get me to a hospital."
"Call my lawyer." "You can't even imagine what we have been through."
We would have everyone feeling sorry for us because we had been jailed and tortured
because we were doing the Lord's work.
Not Paul and Silas!
They didn't even sit down.
They didn't allow anyone to comfort them.
Instead, they chose to comfort others.
They had no time for self-pity.
"They ceased not to teach and preach Jesus Christ."
Give yourself in service to others and you will not have any time to feel sorry for yourself.
Thanks be to god for Jesus who showed us how to deal with difficulties and hardships.
He gave of Himself for others in all that he did! this is the right and healthy way to live!
Message by Dr. Harold L.White
You can email Dr. White at firstname.lastname@example.org