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- A Talk With Jenna : Exile #1 Up fades the cameras on a set. The camera pans around, and sees Jenna Jameson walk out of a trailor naked!! My god, she's so hott. She walks to the set, a photo shoot it seems, and she takes some very sexual poses. As the cameraman bones, RVD and Fonzie walk into our view. Bill has his picture ready. And Rob, well.. he must've smoked something cuz he's not to excitied about seeing Jenna fingering herself twenty feet away from him.
'mr. manager' Bill Alfonso : Man Robby, she's shit hott!!!
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : Yeah, I guess you could say that. I'm hoping this shoot'll hurry up.. I got some questions to ask her.
'mr. manager' Bill Alfonso : No way in hell, Rob, that she'll fuck you.
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : Dude, you're SO perverted. I don't want to ask her that.. I got some questions about Val for her. He thinks he's such a big shot around these lots.. we'll have to find out.
'mr. manager' Bill Alfonso : Dude, if you don't wanna ask Jenna to fuck you.. you've got to be gay.. and that's against the law.. 'cept in California and Seattle and shit.
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : Bro, chill. Having her in bed with me would be totally awesome, but.. I've come with my mind set on different things.
It looks as though the shoots wrapping up, Bill snaps a couple shots of his own.. probably for his own perverted self-enjoyment. But, as Jenna nears her trailor wearing one of those skimpy bead thongs that are practically.. inivisible.. and no bra.. Rob approaches her. Bill's pictures develop as he stares into them with extreme excitement.
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : Jenna? The names Rob. I've come here on.. top secret business of only the RIW's thousands of fans. Don't tell anybody I'm here for promotional purposes.
'porno ass' Jenna Jameson : Why are you here?
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : If I told you that I was here for self promotion in my match on Exile, then I'd have to shoot you so. I'd rather not say. But, down to the point. Do you know.. this man!? Rob whips out a picture of Val Venis His name's Val Venis.. he's said to be greatly know in this part of the professional world..
'porno ass' Jenna Jameson : I've had my fair share of 'play time' with him. Why do you ask?
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : Well, he's my opponent on Exile. And i figure.. since the duded can't wrestle.. I wonder if his videos ever came out good?
'porno ass' Jenna Jameson : Hmm. I didn't like him that much. He acted like I was a baby. I like it hard.. I mean.. fuck the brains out of me. He was all.. intimite. It sucked overall..
Robs eyes get big, then back to serious.
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : Is he a.. minute man?
'porno ass' Jenna Jameson : Well, compared to the others guys I've been with.. definatly.
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : Oh, I see. So.. he sucks at having sex?
'porno ass' Jenna Jameson : Yeah. I mean, some girls might like it. But, this is the real thing, ya know? This isn't about love and affection.
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : Do you know if he can wrestle?
'porno ass' Jenna Jameson : No. He's a loser. All around.
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : I feel the same way. I think he totally sucks balls. Wrestling, and pornographically. He's just.. A One Of A Kind Loser. And if I were a porn star, I'd do a much better job.. and I'd be willing to make girls like you.. enjoy the time we spend.
'porno ass' Jenna Jameson : Oh yeah!
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : But, I won't join any of this magazines untill I retire from the wrestling business. I won't be like Flair. I'll still look like this. And I sure hope you look like that. Cuz WOOH! Dudette.. you've got it going on. And me.. I've got my own thing going on.. in the ring! And Val.. he might as well stay over here in porn-land because in RIW.. you can consider his career.. FUCKED! This match ain't gonna end up like my past couple weeks. I'm on a roll. I've been training non-stop since I lost to Cena. And this week, is Val and Spanky's unlucky week! Though I'm paired with an enemy.. I'll still win. So, in a way.. it's a three-on-one match. Because I can guarantee that Raven isn't looking to beat Spenis.. but to beat ME! Just because of our PPV match. Well, it's not going to work! I'm going to be Spanky, I'm going to be Val Venis, and I'll beat Raven! I'm walking out of Exile a winner!
Jenna clearly loved that speech and is now a little, orgrasmic.
'porno ass' Jenna Jameson : How about, you warm-up for Exile and walk out of here a winner?
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : You mean, you wanna see why they call me the whole FUCKING show?
Jenna nodds in agreement. Bill goes crazy.
'porno ass' Jenna Jameson : But Rob.. is it big?
'whole fuckin show' Rob Van Dam : C'mon broness, you should know by now that EVERYTHINGS BIG WHEN YOU'RE 'mr. manager' Bill Alfonso : The titties, the victories, and the gold!!!
Jenna hops in RVD's arms as they walk out of view. Bill is still in shock that Rob's going 'get his freak on'. Bill, not wanting to follow, stays in the room.. and another photo shoots ends in the background. Bill walks over to her and begins to talk. The cameras fade out as a big 'SLAP!' is heard. And Bill moaning...
- E N D R P
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