Visions of Corn

The following story was the first article I wrote for Veelance. However, due to the complete lack of activity fromVeelance, I decided to move the article to QKW. I also edited it slightly. Only a certain few people may get the inside joke.So if it sucks, go hang yourself. That is all.



The following is a true account of a boy and his fatal obsession with corn:

Little Stephen was a great kid. He was every mother’s dream child. He never cried in restaurants. He never threwtantrums. And he loved to eat his vegetables. He was introduced to the vegetable known in English as "corn" whenhe was six years old. His sister had already been introduced to it, and she ate ten bowls of it every day.Stephen just loved the taste of it, and he loved how it was so yellow. He had a passion for this vegetable. He
was even more into it when he discovered that it came on a cob, and he could eat it without and utensils. Healways liked to use those pointy sharp thingies that you jam into the cob to hold it, so as not to soil one’s hands.

Little Stephen even dressed up as an ear of corn for Halloween one year. The next year, he dressed up as a shucked ear of corn. The next year he dressed up as a single corn kernel. His class took a field trip to a farm one day,and he got to play with the corn shucking machine. This was the turning point.

He got hooked on the destruction that a corn shucking machine could do. He couldn’t get it out of his head. He
dreamed of destroying inanimate objects with a corn shucking machine. His walls were covered with pieces of corn,and from his ceiling, cobs of corn dangled. He bench pressed whole cobs of corn. He doodled pictures of corn all day in his notebooks at school. His teachers became worried and tried to talk with his parents, but they simply explained that "he just looooooooves corn." They couldn’t get it through their heads that their own son was becoming quite disturbed in the head.

As the years passed, Stephen became older, and continued to eat and benchpress more corn. His daily meals consisted of all corn related products. Corn bread, Corn Flakes, corn on the cob, corned hash beef, corn flavored ice cream,corn chips, corn juice, corn filled pop-tarts (which he managed to mix up in his basement), corn creatine, and so on. His parents didn’t seem to mind that he only ate corn. They thought that it was just an innocent passion for corn.

Another few years came and went, and Stephen’s lust for corn grew. His obsession was already getting out of hand, but it was topped off when he made the decision to move into a corn field. His parents didn’t agree
with this decision and wouldn’t let him leave. It was then that they finally realized that Stephen was going insane.They took him to numerous doctors and psychologists to try to evaluate his problem, but their efforts were all in vain. Stephen continued to worship corn. One day, his parents even found a shrine in his closet, consisting of a corn-god statue, and other corn related items. They also found a gym made completely of corn. This was the last straw for his parents. They demanded an explanation from Stephen, but his mind had lost control. He only babbled and muttered words and phrases concerning corn and how much he could
benchpress. His diet now consisted of 38 bowls of corn per meal, followed by 17 corn milkshakes (which were simply corn which had been frapeed in the blender),and topped off with some corn-flavored creatine (taken after he did incline dumbell press).

His parents decided that it would be best if they moved him to a mental institute. Three days later, they got word that he had stabbed both eyes out of 7 nurses and killed 2 doctors using that sharp pointy thingie mentioned earlier (the thingie use to hold corn on the cob). Then he bench pressed his bed. He had fled from the building, but not one soul knew where he went.

As it turned out, he had fled into the nearest cornfield, and built a shack using sleeves of corn. Now he was free
to destroy his mind and benchpress some more. His daily intake of corn skyrocketed and he began to have seizures and foamed at the mouth whenever he didn’t have corn for 10 minutes. He rigged up a system to have corn flowing into his body intravenously 24 hours a day, even when he was sleeping. He had passed the point of no return. His body had begun to reject even the air he breathed. It had developed a strict tolerance of only corn. His body, lacking essential vitamins and nutrients, and of course, oxygen, began to deteriorate. As he
lay in his bed of corn sleeves on night,he died. His body decayed immediately, and where his body was, there lay something strange...........well, actually,there was nothing strange about it, I was just trying to add effect to the story, so fuck you. Anyway, he died and that was that, and his 2 only friends continued to make fun of his ten bowls of corn joke, blah blah blah, I’m sick of writing this story anyway, so go back to the main page and destroy more brain cells by reading the other pointless, mind-desensitizing shit.