Live from the Pepsi Arena, Albany, NY
You know the drill.
(Chyna video package)
Opening match: "The 9th Wonder of the World" Chyna vs. Wendi Wheels
LG: "The following women's contest is scheduled for one fall. In the ring at this time, from Mechanicsburg, PA, WENDI WHEELS!"
("Who I Am" plays)
LG: "And her opponent, representing the Clique, from Nashua, NH, 'THE 9TH WONDER OF THE WORLD' CHYNA!"
Chyna wins with the Pedigree at 3:30.
LG: "Here is your winner, CHYNA!"
Jacqueline attacks after the match, and the women fight to the back.
We look at the brackets for the first round of the JWL World Tag Team Title Tournament.
("*" means winning team)
The Hardy Boyz
The New Age Outlaws*
Tommy Dreamer and the Sandman*
The Dudley Boys
Diamond Dallas Page and Christian
The Faces of Fear
Big Van Vader and Bam Bam Bigelow*
Mikey Whipwreck and Yoshihiro Tajiri
Kurt Angle and Christopher Nowinski*
Ric Flair and Arn Anderson
Raven and Stevie Richards*
Perry Saturn and Gangrel
Jeff Jarrett and Scott Steiner
We go to a biker bar in Houston. We come to a door with a sign that reads AMERICAN BADASS INC. ENTER IF YOU DARE! We go inside and find the Undertaker, Ron Simmons and Jacqueline sitting around a table.
UT: "We have been spending the past few weeks evaluating the applications of several potential new members of American Badass Inc. However, one name kept turning up on the top of the list. Mr. Simmons, please do the honors of introducing our new member."
RON: "Thank you Deadman. This man has been a friend of mine for years and we all think he would fit right in with us at American Badass Inc. Now, it is my honor and privilege to introduce the newest member of American Badass Inc. Please welcome...D-LO BROWN!"
(D-Lo walks into camera view and shakes hands with his new stablemates.)
D-LO: "It is so good to be here in the JWL. From now on, American Badass Inc. will make everybody recognize what it means to be Down with the Brown."
UT: "As of right now, American Badass Inc. is entering the team of Ron Simmons and D-Lo Brown in the JWL World Tag Team Title Tournament."
RON: "Now get out of here punk before we kick your ass."
Back to the ring.
Ron Simmons and D-Lo Brown (w/Jacqueline) vs. Rodney Leinhardt and Pete Gasparino
LG: "The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall. In the ring at this time, from Greenwich, CT, at a total combined weight of 506 lbs., RODNEY LEINHARDT AND PETE GASPARINO!"
("The Real Deal" plays)
LG: "And their opponents, being led to the ring by Jacqueline and representing American Badass Inc., first from Warner-Robins, GA, weighing in at 260 lbs., RON SIMMONS! And his partner, from New Jersey, weighing in at 285 lbs., D-LO BROWN!"
As JR talks about Ron and D-Lo's history in the Nation of Domination in WWE from 1997-1998, D-Lo climbs up to the top turnbuckle and does his head-bobbing routine to a huge pop.
ABI wins a squash, with D-Lo pinning Gasparino after the Sky-High power bomb and Lo-Down frog splash.
LG: "Here are your winners, RON SIMMONS AND D-LO BROWN!"
"Big Poppa Pump" Scott Steiner and Jeff Jarrett (w/Midajah) vs. Ken Stasiowski and Tom Marquez
LG: "The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall. In the ring at this time, first, from Anchorage, AK, weighing in at 235 lbs., KEN STASIOWSKI! And his partner, from Philadelphia, PA, weighing in at 240 lbs., TOM MARQUEZ!"
(Steiner's music plays)
LG: "And their opponents, first, being accompanied by his favorite freak Midajah and representing the Franchise Foundation, from Bay City, MI, weighing in at 270 lbs., 'BIG POPPA PUMP' SCOTT STEINER! And his partner, from Hendersonville, TN, weighing in at 234 lbs., JEFF JARRETT!"
The Foundation members win a squash, with Jarrett forcing Marquez to tap to the figure-four leglock and Steiner forcing Stasiowski to tap to the Steiner Recliner at 3:05.
LG: "Here are your winners, 'BIG POPPA PUMP' SCOTT STEINER AND JEFF JARRETT!"
After everyone has cleared out, Tori climbs over the guardrail where she was sitting with the rest of Raven's Nest, takes the mic from Lillian and enters the ring.
TORI: "I am sick and tired of being overlooked and ignored when it comes to shots at the JWL Women's Title. Molly Holly, get your butt out here. I'm issuing a challenge. If I can beat you tonight in a non-title match, then I get my shot at the belt at WrestleMania. I'm calling you out Molly!"
We don't get Molly's music. Instead, "Perfect Strangers" by Deep Purple plays, bringing out Shane Douglas, who has an evil smile on his face. He approaches Raven and actually looks happy to see him. Shane take a ringside mic.
SHANE: "Raven, I know we haven't always seen eye to eye over the years, but I want to thank you for something. I want to thank you and Stevie for eliminating those damn Horsemen fossils Ric Flair and Arn Anderson from the Tag Team Tournament. Now, I brought some money and a contract. The money is payment for removing the Horsemen from the tournament and also says that you and Stevie agree to step aside in the event that you two come up against my team of Jarrett and Steiner in the tournament. All you have to do is sign here and..."
RAVEN (interrupting): "Shane Douglas, what the hell is wrong with you? Do you actually think that we were looking to benefit you by beating Flair and Arn in the tournament? Are you so sick and deluded that you think that we would take your money and that the Nest would just let you guys advance in the tournament? Get it straight Shane, no one but you cares about your obsession with Flair."
To make things even more complicated, "Time to Rock 'N' Roll" plays, bringing out Trish Stratus.
TRISH: "Raven, on behalf of Stratusfaction Inc., I would like to thank you for beating the Horsemen. While my team, T&A, lost to Vader and Bigelow, in the event that you and Stevie win the tournament, I hope you will consider T&A for the first title shot."
SHANE: "Look woman, what the hell do you care about the Horsemen? Destroying Ric Flair and the Horsemen is my fight, not yours. Why don't you just shut up and look pretty?"
TRISH: "Listen, Shane. On the very first episode of the JWL, Ric Flair made some completely crude and inappropriate suggestions about me, suggesting that I would 'ride Space Mountain' and that he would 'get some Stratusfaction.' Stratusfaction Inc. and the Horsemen have been at each others' throats ever since. So, why don't you worry about your business, and I'll worry about mine."
RAVEN: "Will both of you shut up already? Tori is in the ring waiting for a response from Molly Holly about a potential title shot at WrestleMania, and you two are complaining about something nobody wants to hear. I'm not taking your money and I'm not signing your contract Shane. And Trish, regarding your request for title shots, right now the answer is 'NO!' Quote the Raven: Nevermore. Now, get out before I sic Rhino on you."
Shane and Trish leave separately.
("Revolution" hits to a huge pop.)
MOLLY: "Tori, I'm sorry I didn't answer your challenge earlier. I agree to both of your conditions. You will get a non-title match tonight and if you beat me, you get your title shot at WrestleMania."
Replay of the Dusty promo where he introduced the Nasty Boys.
Non-Title Main Event: JWL Women's Champion Molly Holly © vs. Tori
With both women already in the ring, we dispense with the introductions and get right to the action. We get lots of great moves from both women, drawing great crowd reactions. Tori is clearly hungry for gold, having received very few shots in WWE and having been eliminated very early from the Women's Title Royal Rumble at SuperBrawl. Tori just tears into Molly. Tori hits the superplex and gets the pin and the WrestleMania title shot at 9:30!
LG: "Here is your winner, TORI!"
End of show.