Blonde Jokes
Three dumb girls were stuck on an island they. All were grantted one wish
from a genie.The first wished she was a brannet so she could float across the
river.The second woman wished she was a butterfly so she could fly across. The
third woman wished she
was a man so he could walk across the bridge.
THE END.....
Two dumb blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some
tracks. The first dumb blonde said "These look like deer tracks," and the
other one said,"No they look like moose tracks." They argued and argued for a
while and they were still arguing when the train hit them.
Q: When do blondes when they die get put in Triangular coffins.
A: Because as soon as they hit the pillow there legs spread.
Q: How can you tell that a Blonde has been driving your car?
A: From the lipstick on the steeringwheel, where she tried to blow the horn..
Q: What do you call a blond behind the wheel of a car?
A: An Air Bag
Q: Why can't you teach a blond to water skee?
A: Because every time her twat gets wet she sticks her legs in the air.
Q: how many blondes did it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 100...1 to hold the light bulb and 99 to turn the house
Q: Why do blondes wear big hoop earings?
A: They need a place to hook their ankles.
Q: How does a blonde turn on the lights after having sex?
A: Opens the car door.
Q. How do you know that a blonde has been in the Refrigerater?
A. When there is lip stick on the cuecobmers.
Q: How can you tell a blonde has been sending e-mail?
A: There are stamps all over the screen.
Q: Why do Blondes wear Pony-Tails?
A: To hide the Air Valve!
Q: How do you confuse a blond?
A: Put her in a curricular room and tell her to pee
in the corner.
Q: How does a blonde confuse you?
A: Tells you she did it.
Q What is the similarity between a smart blond, Santa and the tooth fairy?
A They are all make believe.
Q Why did the blond climb on the roof?
A She heard that drinks were on the house.
Q What does a blonde say when you asked her what the last two words of the
national anthem are?
A Play ball.
Q What do you call a blond with a half brain?
A Gifted.
Q What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
A Pull the pin and throw it back.
Q What do you call ten blondes at the bottom of a pool?
A An air bubble.
Q How do you drown a blonde?
A Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.
Q Why is a blondes brain pea sized in the morning?
A It swelled.
Q What do you call a blonde who dyes her hair?
A Artificial intelligence.
Q Did you hear about the blonde who broke her arm?
A She was raking leaves when she fell out of the tree.
Q Why did the blonde get fired from the m & m factory?
A She threw out all the ones with w's.
Q What can strike a blonde without them even knowing it?
A A thought
Q A dumb blonde a smart blonde and Santa Claus jump off of a bridge, who makes
the bigger splash?
A The dumb blonde because the others don't exist.
Q: How do blonde braincells die?
A: Alone.
Q: Why aren't blondes good cattle herders?
A: Because they can't even keep two calves together!
Q: What did the blonde's right leg say to the left leg?
A: Nothing. They've never met.
Q: Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A: Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!
Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up?
A: To catch everything that goes over their heads.
Q: Why is it good to have a blonde passenger?
A: You can park in the handicap zone.
Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes light up?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.
Q: How do you get a blondes eyes to twinkle?
A: Shine a torch in her ears.
Q1 How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer?
A: There's white-out on the screen.
Q2: How can you tell if another blonde's been using the computer?
A: There's writing on the white-out.
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a computer?
A: You only have to punch information into a computer once.
Q: Why don't blondes eat Jello?
A: They can't figure out how to get two cups of water into those
little packages.
Q: Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
A: Because red means stop.
Q: What's the mating call of the blonde?
A: "I'm *sooo* drunk!"
Q: What is the mating call of the ugly blonde?
A: (Screaming) "I said: I'm drunk!"
Q: Why do blondes drive BMWs?
A: Because they can spell it.
Q: Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes?
A: Toes Go In First.
Q: Why do blondes have TGIF on their shirts?
A: Tits Go In Front.
Q: What's the first thing a blonde does in the morning?
A1: Introduces themself.
A2: Walks home.
Q: What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
A: A wind tunnel.
