Men In Black (1997)
Grade: B
Cast: Tommy Lee Jones, Will Smith, Vincent D'Onofrio, Linda Fiorentino, Rip Torn, Tony Shaloub
Director: Barry Sonnenfeld
Rated PG-13 for language and sci-fi action violence.

Men In Black II (2002)
Grade: C
Cast: Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Lara Flynn Boyle, Johnny Knoxville, Rosario Dawson, Rip Torn, Tony Shaloub
Director: Barry Sonnenfeld
Rated PG-13 for sci-fi action violence and some provocative humor.


The ultimate in 'cool', slick summer action comedy is probably "Men In Black". It’s cool, it’s slick, it’s an action comedy, and it came out in the summer. That just about fits my criteria, I’d say. My reaction to it is like a toddler’s reaction to a bubble—I was amused at it floated around aimlessly, and then started to rapidly forget about it as it vanished. Its new sequel, "Men In Black II", is even more amiably inconsequential.

In the original, Kay (Tommy Lee Jones) recruits Jay, formerly James Darrel Edwards (Will Smith) as his new partner in the top-secret alien-busters agency MiB, which stands for Men in Black. Their job is to control extra-terrestrial life on earth by both stopping alien violence and keeping the aliens secret from the general public. Whenever a normal citizen experiences a close encounter, an MiB agent flashes them with a neuralizer, which erases one’s memory. How it knows how much of the memory to erase is a complete mystery to me. Anyway, their latest challenge is to find an alien who has taken the body of a farmer (Vincent D’Onofrio, doing very funny physical comedy with much help from the excellent makeup) and doesn’t really care that he’s going to cause the end of earth’s existence. All of this is played straight by Jones and exaggeratedly by Smith as they walk through fields of special effects while speaking droll comedic dialogue.

"Men In Black" never ends up being either a great comedy or a great action film—it’s structure is too wobbly and it’s too self-aware—but it is pretty enjoyable entertainment, with an unimportant plot setting up funny lines from Smith and even funnier, serious reactions from Jones. It feels fresh because of the brand new things it is showing us, and that’s the source of a lot of its charm. Its freshness is also one of the reasons why "Men In Black II" isn’t so successful.

A comic mayhem runs through "Men In Black"’s veins, and it is only increased by Danny Elfman’s funny, rambunctious score and the fun, self-aware performances of Smith and Jones. We get the sense that everyone involved is actually having fun (I think I’m setting a record for uses of the words ‘fun’ and ‘funny’ here). The film itself is something I find to be a little overrated (too many stretches that aren’t funny, too many plot holes, etc.), but that’s only because of all the praise it has gotten. "Men In Black" has one of the most simultaneously clever and thin premises I’ve ever known of, but it uses it to great effect.

"Men In Black" ends in a sort-of-action-scene that actually excites us. The damsel in distress (Linda Fiorentino) is a good one, and the script and direction lead us to believe that, maybe, just maybe, there’s something at stake. No such benefit in "Men In Black II". It’s a much lazier film. Using the sequel-on-autopilot formula in which the roles are reversed, it comes across as even thinner and more transparent than the admittedly amusing "Rush Hour 2". It also makes the mistake that almost all action films have so far in 2002: the action is boring. Not exciting. Dull. Only "Panic Room", "Attack of the Clones", and "Spider-Man" have given me true suspense.

In the sequel, Kay is being recruited and for a while we have Smith as a straight man (gasp! Memories of "Wild Wild West"!). Since Kay was neuralized in the first film, he is brought in and deneuralized, experiencing what, I suppose, is a sci-fi fan’s version of amnesia. Then, there’s something about…aw, I don’t remember because the plot’s so invisible. It had something to do with a two-headed alien (Johnny Knoxville—so funny on TV’s “Jackass”, yet so amazingly unfunny here) and a sexy alien named Serleena (Lara Flynn Boyle, looking more attractive than I figured she was capable of looking, but maybe it’s just the lingerie), and…a light…and…I have to stop there, sorry.

The film itself must think we’ve been neuralized, since it seems to count on everything from the original being funny again this time, five years later. Five years is a long time, plenty of time to give us a killer popcorn flick, but "Men In Black II" is even lighter than popcorn, and not as tasty, either. It has a plot that I didn’t care for or understand, or want to understand, and it has too many jokes that fall flat (when a whole lead character and a half—the two headed alien, the other head being the half—is not funny at all, you probably have a problem), possibly due to a certain “safeness” the screenwriters seemed to demand. The fact that there aren’t any profanities doesn’t bother me (although it’s odd), but the fact that it is the opposite of edgy does bother me. We get a Michael Jackson cameo, and, while Michael may make you smile upon appearance, he has absolutely nothing to do. He has four lines, maybe, TOPS, of talking to Zed (Rip Torn), and none of it is funny. We are expected to laugh just because he’s Michael Jackson, but we can’t because…well, because it isn’t funny.

Jones and Smith, in the sequel, lose a significant amount of the effect they had in the first one. Jones is made to act dazed and confused initially, and he does (quite well, actually), but he remembers the entire MiB universe so quickly and abruptly that we can never really believe him as a character. Smith can’t decide if he wants to keep making wisecracks in the sequel or all of a sudden be more serious and therefore critically respected (and from interviews, his thoughts on his Oscar nomination for "Ali" indicate that that might be the case). Smith’s love interest, Rosario Dawson, is cute but nothing more, and Boyle is a sexy special effect but nothing more.

"Men In Black II" is not a complete loss, though. I got a good laugh out of the 'Ballchinean' joke, and there were some good gags throughout (a lot of them, though, were ruined in the trailer). Plus, it tops its predecessor in one area: the ending. I was glad it ended soon, first of all, but I was also pleased because of how clever the send-off was. It creates a tough task for the writer of "Men In Black III", but I genuinely loved the last shot. It was the best part of the whole movie.

Something about "Men In Black II", however, no matter what its flaws were, kept me from hating it, or even really disliking it. I’m not sure if it’s because it had plenty of charm to spare, or because it had some genuine bright spots, or because of the spirit of the actors, despite the fact that they are often hitting the wrong note. I can’t recommend "Men In Black II", but I can say that you could do worse. I’m indifferent about another sequel. It would be beating a dead horse, but a very profitable and sometimes wickedly funny horse.


-Alex, July 2002