| The Black Jack Index | |||||||||
| //education.bji.d-bag.051604.dooshbag | |||||||||
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| Ever see an attractive lady walk by and your friend goes "Wow, she's a ten"? Well God bless your friend who has managed to reduce an entire person's being into a simple number. Way to go, captain, you've reduced a human being into a digit on a scale of 1 to 10. Placing a woman's value on a scale of 1 to 10 is ridiculous and insulting to women every where.
It should be on a scale to 21. Dooshbag.org would like to proudly introduce... The Black Jack Index, a revolutionary new method for reducing women to a simple number. The BJI consists of seven unique categories, each category with an appropriate score between 0 and 3, 3 being the best. Each category must be ranked seperately and then the total score is tallied only at the end, to give an overall score - the maximum of which is 21... Blackjack! The categories: Face: Based purely on the attractiveness of the lady's mug. As a general rule, pouty lips are good and glass eyes are bad... unless you're into that sort of thing. Body: The most shallow of categories, based only on the pleasantness of the female's body. High scores for big racks and small arses. "Extra" anything - as in toes, nipples, arms or eyes will result in a one point deduction for each. Humor: Did she giggle when you told her grandma died? Did she chuckle when you explained that you were secretly selling her panties on Ebay? Did she die laughing when you told her that you had just given her the Clap? She's a keeper and you should show her the love in this category. Compatibility: Does she work for the CIA? Are you a member of Al-Qaeda? Make sure it shows in the scoring here. Availability: Does she live in another state... or prison? Baggage: Was she a former presidential intern or has an ex in Texas named Leatherface? Going to lose points here. Lower the score, morer the baggage. Intelligence: Can she balance a checkbook? Of course not, she's a woman. But she'll get points for trying. So there you are. The Black Jack Index. Remember, it is very difficult to get high scores, so if you find a girl that's a 17, just remember that "Dealer stays" at 17 and you latch on to that fine young lady. And, let us not forget, math is hard. So feel free to bring a calculator to the bar with you. If you find that lucky 21, it'll be worth it. BONUS: An Black Jack Index example utilizing Jennifer Love Hewitt! |
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