Quotes (Page 12)!

  1. �I want a book that talks to me in Tony Jay�s voice�� ~Duckie
  2. �Cause that�s like racial disintegration or something.� ~Anonymous idiot at PHS
  3. �She made a career of being elderly.� ~Ms. Gibson
  4. �Doesn�t have to be pretty, it just has to be done.� ~Ms. Gibson
  5. �I looked at the stars, and considered how awful it would be for a man to turn his face up to them as he froze to death, and see no help or pity in all the glittering multitude.� ~Pip
  6. �Whitewash on the forehead hardens the brain into a slate of obstinacy perhaps. Anyhow, with whitewash from the wall on my forehead, my obstinacy became adamantine.� ~Pip
  7. �Mr. Wopsle�s great-aunt conquered a confirmed habit of living into which she had fallen�� ~Pip
  8. �Mr. Wopsle�s great-aunt successfully overcame that bad habit of living, so highly desirable to be got rid of by some people.� ~Pip
  9. �This penalty of being jiggered was a favourite supposititious case of his. He attached no definite meaning to the word that I am aware of, but used it�to affront mankind, and convey an idea of something savagely damaging. When I was younger, I had had a general belief that if he had jiggered me personally, he would have done it with a sharp and twisted hook.� ~Pip
  10. �Hear this! Babies are to be nut-crackered dead, for people�s poor grandpa�s positions!� ~Mr. Pocket
  11. �Mort was one of those people who are more dangerous than a bag full of rattlesnakes. He was determined to discover the underlying logic behind the universe.� ~Terry Pratchett, Mort
  12. �I wish I�d get out of my head, it�s quite crowded enough with me in here.� ~Mort
  13. �But remember, if you ever need you, you�re always around.� ~Mort
  14. �There should be a word for that brief period just after waking when the mind is full of warm pink nothing. You lie there entirely empty of thought, except for a growing suspicion that heading towards you, like a sockful of damp sand in a nocturnal alleyway, are all the recollections you�d really rather do without, and which amount to the fact that the only mitigating factor in your horrible future is the certainty that it will be quite short.� ~Terry Pratchett, Mort
  15. �The problem is that the variables are not constant.� ~Mr. Marburger
  16. �They�re all demons. But Crowley�s the evil one?� ~Melissa, trying to understand Good Omens
  17. "Of course I was a dork, but that's OK. Because all the coolest people I know were dorks." ~Brendan Fraser
  18. "My marriage has worked because I am not around much." ~Michael Palin
  19. �If I am seen as successful, it's all the more reason not to change - not to lose track of friends, not to be driven everywhere, not to go and get away from the world. That, to me, is real success: enjoying what you do, but being the same person." ~Michael Palin
  20. �Sorry, Venkman. I�m terrified beyond the capacity for rational thought.� ~Dr. Egon Spengler
  21. �We aim to try.� ~Deputy Clementine Johnson
  22. "If you ever get one of these, don't do this..." ~Mom
  23. "Cheer up; let�s bust a hooker." ~Lieutenant Jim Dangle
  24. �The first time I saw you, I thought you were making sense.� ~Michael Caine to Jon Stewart
  25. �In theory it was, around now, Literature. Susan hated Literature. She� much prefer to read a good book.� ~Terry Pratchett, Soul Music
  26. �It was a free country. People could like daffodils if they wanted to. The just should not, in Susan�s very definite and precise opinion, be allowed to take up more than a page to say so.� ~Terry Pratchett, Soul Music
  27. �[Susan] got on with her education. In her opinion, school kept on trying to interfere with it.� ~Terry Pratchett, Soul Music
  28. �She�d always known she was different. Much more aware of the world, when it was obvious that most people went through it with their eyes shut and their brains set to �simmer.�� ~Terry Pratchett, Soul Music
  29. �Deafness doesn�t prevent composers hearing the music. It prevents them hearing the distractions.� ~Terry Pratchett, Soul Music
  30. �In my experience, what every true artist wants, really wants, is to be paid.� ~Glod Glodson
  31. "Something bloody stupid's been going on here, and I'm going to wait quite patiently until the Dean owns up." ~Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully
  32. �If [Death] really picked things up from humans, had he tried insanity? It was very popular, after all.� ~Susan Sto-Helit
  33. �They always gives me bath salts. And bath soap and bubble bath and herbal bath lumps and tons of bath stuff and I can�t think why, �cos it�s not as if I hardly ever has a bath. You�d think they�d take the hint, wouldn�t you?� ~Corporal Nobby Nobbs
  34. �Funny thing, that. That statement is either so deep it would take a lifetime to fully comprehend every particle of its meaning, or it is a load of absolute tosh.� ~Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully
  35. ��if it�s a kill-or-cure remedy then we are, given that the patient is practically immortal, probably onto a winner.� ~Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully
  36. �It was amazing the mischief that could be caused in a house where no one in authority thought you existed.� ~Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
  37. �Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.� ~Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully
  38. +++ Divide By Cucumber Error. Please Reinstall Universe And Reboot +++ ~Hex
  39. DO I DETECT A NOTE OF UNSEASONAL GRUMPINESS? NO SUGAR PIGGYWIGGY FOR YOU, ALBERT. ~Death
  40. �Careful! Careless talk creates lives!� ~Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully
  41. �It�s because [the senior wizards�] minds are so often involved with deep and problematic matters, [Ponder] told himself, that their mouths were allowed to wander around making a nuisance of themselves.� ~Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
  42. �Charity ain�t giving people what you wants to give, it�s giving people what they need to get.� ~Albert
  43. �It is only moral for a cute redhead to get everything they want if that cute redhead is Thomas. So there.� ~Tsionainn
  44. �You pick up that gnome, you're a dead man!" ~Lt. Jim Dangle
  45. �[Violet] certainly did have a pleasant voice, Bilious told himself. It was just that in a funny way it grated, too. It was like listening to a talking flute.� ~Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
  46. �Part of Bilious thought: I�m attracted to a girl who actually has to shut down all other brain functions in order to think about the order of the letters of the alphabet. On the other hand, she�s attracted to someone who�s wearing a toga that looks as though a family of weasles have had a party in it, so maybe I�ll stop this thought right here.� ~Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
  47. MERE ACCUMULATION OF OBSERVATIONAL EVIDENCE IS NOT PROOF. ~Death
  48. YOU HAVE TO START OUT LEARNING TO BELIEVE THE LITTLE LIES [before you can believe the big ones]. JUSTICE. MERCY. DUTY. THAT SORT OF THING....TAKE THE UNIVERSE AND GRIND IT DOWN TO THE FINEST POWDER AND SIEVE IT THROUGH THE FINEST SIEVE AND THEN SHOW ME ONE ATOM OF JUSTICE, ONE MOLECULE OF MERCY. AND YET�AND YET YOU ACT LIKE THERE IS SOME IDEAL ORDER IN THE WORLD, AS IF THERE IS SOME...SOME RIGHTNESS IN THE UNIVERSE BY WHICH IT MAY BE JUDGED. ~Death
  49. THE WORLD WILL TEACH THEM ABOUT MONSTERS SOON ENOUGH. LET THEM REMEMBER THERE�S ALWAYS THE POKER. ~Death
  50. SOME PEOPLE WILL DO ANYTHING FOR THE SHEER FASCINATION OF DOING IT. OR FOR FAME. OR BECAUSE THEY SHOLDN�T. ~Death
  51. �I don�t actually think that I want to tell the Archchancellor that [Hex] stops working if we take its fluffy teddy bear away. I just don�t think I want to live in that kind of world.� ~Ponder Stibbons
  52. �If you have enough book-space, I don�t want to talk to you.� ~Terry Pratchett
  53. �Black goes with anything. At least anything black.� ~Terry Pratchett
  54. �Feedback?! I get �We have your daughter until you rewrite Chapter 12 to our satisfaction.�� ~Terry Pratchett
  55. �Sometimes I write things that impress even me.� ~Terry Pratchett
  56. �It�s down to texture�.The plot is not necessarily important if you get the texture right.� ~Terry Pratchett
  57. �You don�t want to make enemies in nuclear engineering.� ~Terry Pratchtt
  58. �Some parts seem to be a documentary.� ~Terry Pratchett on The Simpsons (specifically the power plant)
  59. �Death is such a sure-fire winner.� ~Terry Pratchett
  60. �That�s kind of nice. You die, and then you go to Discworld.� ~Terry Pratchett
  61. �I just rearrange words into a pleasing order for money.� ~Terry Pratchett
  62. �Ultimately, I�m in it for the craic.� ~Terry Pratchett (�craic� is pronounced �crack�)
  63. �I cannot conceive not writing.� ~Terry Pratchett
  64. �I would like them to give you the books and give me the money.� ~Terry Pratchett on publishing companies
  65. �I have books that have as bookmarks other books.� ~Terry Pratchett
  66. �I�m still confused as to how many times you have to multiply one by one to get to two.� ~Jake
  67. �Have they been using my name in vain?� ~Mr. Jaffurs
  68. �Pip blew it, it�s over. Yay for Biddy and Joe.� ~Tameika
  69. �He�s constant in his Joe-ness.� ~Ms. Gibson on Joe Gargery
  70. �I need a Klashnikov.� ~Ms. Gibson
  71. �I would be in trouble if I macheteed a student.� ~Ms. Gibson
  72. �I am not paying you off in drugs.� ~Ms. Gibson
  73. �Am I gonna get a teacup to pull 26 Gs?� ~Mr. Marburger
  74. �When you say �vacuum,� you don�t mean A Vacuum�?� ~Anonymous idiot in my Physics class
  75. �But then we�ll have to deal with the fact that her innards will become exards.� ~Marshall
  76. �The difference between construction and creation is exactly this: that a thing constructed can only be loved after it is constructed, but a thing created is loved before it exists.� ~Charles Dickens
  77. "I have, er, noticed on signing tours that (somewhere between the age of ten and eighteen) girls with names like Susan or Nicola metamorphose into girls with names like Susi, Suzi, Suzie, Siouxsie, Tsuzi, Zuzi and Niki, Nicci, Nikki and Nikkie (this is in about the same time period as boys with names like Adrian and Robert become boys with names like Crash and Frab). This is fine by me, I merely chronicle the observation. I've always had a soft spot for people who want to redesign their souls.� ~Terry Pratchett
  78. �How hard can it be to blow up a room full of gasoline?!� ~Adam Savage
  79. �Any day we create that much shrapnel is a good day.� ~Jamie Hyneman
  80. �Boredom is one of the most blissful feelings.� ~Terry Pratchett
  81. �Trouble was, you couldn�t shoot someone for having an annoying laugh.� ~Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
  82. �Vimes snapped, but very gently.� ~Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
  83. �Well done! Consciousness to sarcasm in five seconds!� ~Lu Tze
  84. ��Twenty-five dollars or I walk out that door,� he said. It was probably a phrase never ever said before by any prisoner anywhere on any world.� ~Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
  85. �Someone cleared his throat with malice aforethought.� ~Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
  86. �[Vimes�] glare ran from face to face, causing most of the squad to do an immediate impression of the Floorboard and Ceiling Inspectors Synchronized Observation Team.� ~Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
  87. �You�re an interesting man, Sargeant. You make enemies like a craftsman.� ~Dr. Lawn
  88. �It wasn�t easy, living in the past. You couldn�t whack someone for what they were going to do, or for what the world was going to find out later. You couldn�t warn people, either. You didn�t know what could change the future, but if he understood things right, history tended to spring back into shape. All you could change was the bits around the edges, the fine details. There was nothing he could do about the big stuff.� ~Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
  89. �That was always the dream, wasn�t it? �I wish I knew then what I know now�? But when you got older, you found out that you now wasn�t you then. You then was a twerp. You then was what you had to be to start out on the rocky road of becoming you now, and one of the rocky patches on that road was being a twerp.� ~Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
  90. �We who think we are about to die will laugh at anything.� ~Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
  91. ��here�s some advice, boy. Don�t put your trust in revolutions. They always come around again. That�s why they�re called revolutions.� ~Commander Samuel Vimes
  92. �Despite his barely basic grasp of the language, Mr. Sun�s expression suggested very clearly that the three-stripe, one-crown copper in front of him had dropped in from the planet Idiot.� ~Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
  93. �Rust was always a man in interrupt an answer with a demand for the answer he was, in fact, interrupting. �~Terry Pratchett, Night Watch
  94. "Between every rational moment were a billion irrational ones." ~Terry Pratchett, Hogfather
  95. �When one is in town, one amuses oneself. When one is in the country, one amuses other people. It is excessively boring.� ~Jack Worthing
  96. �I really don�t see anything romantic in proposing. It is very romantic to be in love. But there is nothing romantic about a defiite proposal. Why, one may be accepted. One usually is, I believe. Then th excitement is all over. The very essence of romance is uncertainty. If ever I get married, I�ll certainly try to forget the fact.� ~Algernon Moncrieff
  97. �I�m irritated, I have a headache, and I�d like to never speak of this again.� ~Deputy Clementine Johnson
  98. �Oh! it is absurd to have a hard-and-fast rule about what one should read and what one shouldn�t. More than half of modern culture depends on what one shouldn�t read.� ~Algernon Moncrieff
  99. �Some aunts are tall, some aunts are not tall. That is a matter that surely an aunt may be allowed to decide for herself.� ~Jack Worthing
  100. �My dear Algy, you talk as if you were a dentist. It is very vulgar to talk like a dentist when one isn�t a dentist. It produces a false impression.� ~Jack Worthing

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