All You Need To Know About Me

Nesha
Kabuki Master Assassin

So who the hell am I???

I am Nesha Nightwolfe, the unquestioned Lord & Master of the Universe. I make some damn tasty cornbread. Who the fuck are you?

I'm 23 and I live in Oklahomo. Im pretty boring but I still have a website, which is pointless to say the least. Well, maybe not, b/c if I didn't have it nobody would know I exist or how awesome I am. I have 3 pets, Kwyjibo(fish), Mr. Bojangles(fish), and Nika Tequila(chihuahua). I want a wolf, butt I can't have one now that I have a kid, b/c I'd never hear the end of it from my mom. She thinks wolves are dangerous, even though they can be the most loyal pets you could ever have, but of course NOBODY know more than her. I love animals, I hate cruelty, and I believe that humans with their selfishness & idiocy will be the doom of the Earth. If you want even more of me, go here for a list of my favorite things.

Stats

Birthday: January 6, 1981

Birthplace: Wisconsin

Height: Almost 5'1"

Eyes: Dark brown & watery. Damn mold spores!

Shoe size: Childrens 4, womens 5-7

# of piercings: 15 in my ears, my nostril, and labret. I used to have my navel done(until I got knocked up anyway), both nipples, and 4 more ear piercings.

Fun Facts About Me!

*I'm a shitkicker. I was raised on horse farms out in the sticks until 4th grade. Yes, I like country music, and yes, I can ride a horse. No, I don't wear cowboy hats or Rockies. I am willing to wear cowboy boots though.

*I am living proof that there really is such a disease as Cat Scratch Fever. I had it in 2nd grade. It's a kind of blood infection. You get it when a cat with shit under it's nails scratches you. I almost died, yet people still laugh when I tell them the story... bastards!

*I am female, yet I think my boobs are too BIG. I'm a 36B, but I'd give anything to be a 36A. I hate big boobies. If I wasn't so poor, I'd get a reduction.

*My coochie-pop is actually tighter after giving birth, says Kent anyway. Go figure. I think the doctor put a few extra stitches in when she was sewing up my episiotomy.

*I have 2 different ears. My left ear is smaller than my right, and kind of pointed. My right ear is normal looking. I'm a FREEEEEAAAK!!! Don't look at me!

*I once dyed my pubes hot pink. I have pictures, but they will never be seen. You'll just have to suffer.

*I was once legally blind. When I was in 6th grade, my vision had gotten so bad(I think it was something like 20/3000. Normal vision is 20/20!) that I was considered legally blind. I found an awesome eye doctor though, who put me on the 'Ortho-K' program, which gradually reshapes the surface of the eye with hard contact lenses to improve vision. I don't know exactly what it is now, but it's around 20/200 or 300. The next step is laser surgery, which I'm terrified to get but I hate wearing contacts enough to go through with it. Pray for me!

My Beliefs

I'm a conservative anti-liberal, b/c liberals are morons, & I lean more toward the republican side b/c most democrats are liberal morons & babykillers. I don't really subscribe to any religion, at least not any organized ones. I pray to the Great Spirit a lot though, and that seems to work out quite well.

Hobbies & What I do For Fun

I like all the usual shit like reading, writing & drawing. I like reading those "Mysteries of the unknown" type books, Nancy Collins vampire novels(some of the most fucked-up shit I've ever read), science stuff like Steven Hawking's books, Carlos Castaneda's books, really too much different stuff to list here. I enjoy writing b/c I like to share my views on stuff, as you can see w/my website. I draw wierd shit, I won't even go into that, though I may make a "my art" section on this site one day. I do beadwork & jewelry-making too. Not too much though, since I lose patience with stuff easily, and beadwork is slow & frustrating. I also love computers. I enjoy playing with old or obscure computers & reading about them. I have a 1982 Compaq Portable that I got for $20 at some old lady's garage sale. It's my pride & joy. It has NO memory, you have to put the DOS disk in to even work with it. Cool. I don't know why I like those old clunkers so much, I just think they're neat. It's amazing to think that a so-called "supercomputer" that cost $10,000 in the 80's would fill up an entire room & had less power & memory than my damn cell phone does now. It's so interesting to see how far we've come. If I had the money, I'd be a computer collector. I'm a damn dork. I'm a total gadget-whore too, I love little electronic things & I can figure anything out w/o reading the instructions. I've been a science nerd since infancy, I was a gifted child in grade school(which is probably what made me hate people the way I do now, b/c all the "cool" kids equated knowledge with loser-ness. But who's laughing now assholes? That's right, pump my gas). I knew the order of the planets by age 1. I was a very advanced baby- I was walking at 6-7 months & running by 8 months. I was talking in full sentences by that time too & my mom tells me I used to say "I love you" all the time. What happened?! Just kidding, I don't hate everything. Not yet anyways. But gimme time.

My Portentous Birth

I was born on January 6th, 1981, in Wisconsin & the night I was born(or spawned, or hatched, depending who you talk to), there was a windchill of -60 degrees. There was frost on the inside walls of the hospital. Pretty crazy huh? That's probably why I hate hot weather so much, I've been a frigid bitch from day 1.

Memories & Friends

I like going through my old stuff & remembering fun times. High school was a blast. I had these 3 best friends, Kiley, Cherie & Bonnie. Kiley was Kilex, b/c on her student ID card they put Kilex instead of Kiley. She was the insane one, although you'd never have known by looking at her. She was this cute little preppy girl who was the color of an oompa-loompa b/c she used to go tanning all the time. She got humiliated in English class in 10th grade when we were working in groups one day. This guy in our group made a comment to her while we were working- "Do you realize that you're orange?" We all had a good laugh over that one. She had the foulest mouth I've ever heard, even worse than mine. We used to get into such shit together. Her hobby was being embarrassed actually, b/c everything made her say "Oh my god you guys, people are watching!" I've known Kilex since 5th grade, though we only became friends in 8th grade. We used to be the best of friends, but now she's an anti-social whore & she never calls any of us anymore. I think she married some nerd.

Bonnie was Boner. That one's easy to figure out. We used to be enemies back in middle school before we ever friends. Kilex made us be friends, and we eventually liked each other enough to hang out by ourselves w/o Kilex there. Boner was very troubled. Her dad was a big fat pervert & her mom was a mousy little church lady. How Boner & her sister were ever born is beyond me. Their dad used to stand over their beds at night & play with himself, and Boner couldn't take it anymore & ran away in our Junior year. I didn't see her much after that. She eventually came back after a while, but never went back home or talked to her dad. I don't blame her. She was wierd though, she used to have this character she would do called "Cowboy Dick". Then there was Double-O-Boner. Then she got into the whole Riot Grrrl movement. I thought it was pretty stupid, but I still have all the 'zines that she got in trouble for at school for distributing. She's a pharmacist at Wam-Lart now, and I think she's still going to school to be an OBGYN. I told her she'd be looking at puds all day if she did that, but she was like "That's cool!". I can just see Bonnie looking at some diseased hooker's crotch & saying "Yup, you've got herpes!". That crazy bitch...

Cherie was Tuna. Her full name is Cherastina, and the story of how she got her nickname is funny. I had heard some guys behind me in health class making fun of some girl named Tina, calling her Tuna. I chuckled & started thinking if I knew anyone named Tina to make fun of. Then I thought of CherasTINA, and began calling her CherasTUNA, eventually shortened to just Tuna. She's the one who introduced me & Kent, back in 11th grade. One day, we couldn't find her at lunch, so we had Kent go into the office & ask the secretary to page "Cherastuna Webb". Hee hee! They announced it over the intercom & everything. She was so embarrassed & we all died laughing right outside the office. Tuna was the token ballbusting bitch in our group. Her hobby was making fun of guys' dick sizes(an activity she still enjoys to this day) & starting fights. She was our bodyguard- anyone fucked with her friends, and she'd kick their asses. She taught me much, heh. Kent got robbed once back in 2000, and we found the girl who had her friends- or rather, all the guys she was screwing, do it. We caught her outside the apartment complex one day & confronted her. She started giving us all this bullshit about how Kent had "hurt" her & whatnot, and I grabbed my baseball bat & said "This is gonna hurt a lot more bitch!" & chased her down waving the bat over my head. I was gonna beat her to a bloody pulp but she ran into her grandparents' house & got away. Cherie actually didn't do anything, but she inspired me. That was fun. Once me & Kiley put hideous makeup on Tuna while she slept. The next day she woke up & got all pissed off at us, and when she got home her brother was taking a shower so she had to wait to wash it all off & she broke out really bad. She still bitches about that. We're the only 2 that really still talk or hang out from the original group.

Hezekiah, who you all know, is quite the crazy bitch. I have known her since I was 8 & she was 3. We've gotten into so much shit together, and I really think we'll be friends forever. Cheesy shit I know, but it's true.

Home Life

As of right now, I am still stuck at my parents' house. Me & Kent had a house which we shared with his drunkle, but our landlord was a dick & started giving us all this bullshit about how we supposedly weren't paying our bills(which we were) & eventually kicked us all out. So we've been at our parents' houses ever since. We have a house, but it's undergoing a lot of work right now & we won't be able to move in for another month or two. My mom tries to demand that I stay with them until May, but I'll shoot myself if I have to deal with her till then.

That's all I can think of now. I'll update later if I think of any important info you should know about me.

Talk to me damnit!!!

AIM: KiowaSkank

Yahoo: bguung

Email: Kiowaskank@cox.net(spam me & I'll kill you)