AOI TORI

Disclaimers: Song by Plastic Tree, translation taken from nejimaki.net. The members of Kagrra, belong to themselves.

 

~*~
蒼い鳥が飛ぶような晴れた綺麗な日です
見つけられない僕等　神様が笑った
It's the kind of beautiful, clear day on which a blue bird might fly
Unable to find us, God laughs
~*~

It was going to be Tanabata Matsuri the next day.

 

Most families, especially those with young children had set up stalks and stalks of bamboo, aesthetically arranged. Everywhere Nao looked, the leafy branches were laden with fluttering wishes. It was a strangely uplifting sight. Even the lone widow next-door had a tiny plastic pot bearing an equally fake stalk of bamboo. He grinned, remembering the smile she gave him when he’d turned up at her doorstep with an armful of fresh bamboo stalks.

 

Evening now. Daylight was fading, though it was still bright enough for him to count the colourful streamers fluttering in the breeze from his window. Shin wasn’t home yet – probably still working on the new song with Akiya – so he waited, looking out idly at the origami animals and boats some children had strung up and hung outside their windows. Stretching like a lethargic cat, he grabbed some pieces of paper and began folding them deftly into paper cranes.

 

He’d always liked Tanabata Matsuri. The story of Orihime and Kengyu had captured his childhood fantasy, and the beautiful decorations never failed to make the festive mood contagious. Most of all, he loved the wishing that happened each year. Wishing seemed to make everyone happy, no matter if the wishes were granted in the end. It wasn’t just the hope that accompanied the action, it was an outlet for secret dreams and hidden desires, and he had long since learnt that it didn’t cost to wish – how many times had he dropped hints about a longed-for toy? As it was, the few bamboo stalks in their apartment already bore the weight of several wishes. They weren’t extravagant. Luck for their album, a good night’s sleep, new guitar equipment, one of those burgers that Izumi’s so good at cooking… just small, random moments of happiness. And of course, the time to appreciate them, the bassist reminded himself as he hastily scribbled it down, making a face at their hectic schedule. The newest wish was hung on a higher branch next to an origami rabbit. Nao stood back, grinning at his work before his expression turned contemplative.

 

He still had one more wish. Something he wished for every year ever since he moved in with Shin. It was a simple wish, easily granted and because of that he was reluctant to let the blond know. He knew he shouldn’t even have to wish for something like that. He was still struggling with the urge to write it down when an idea struck him.

 

/I’ll write it and fold the paper into another crane. Shin-chan won’t ever know./

 

Scrambling over to the window, he blinked, realising that he’d written the most recent wish on the last piece of white origami paper. The brunette shrugged, stuck his tongue out at the bright red and orange paper in the packet and eventually settled on a pale blue piece. So much for not calling attention to that particular crane. He dismissed the thought, deciding that it would be easier for him to identify his wish anyway. The blue crane was placed on the tallest branch, as if it was a star on a Christmas tree.

 

~*~
見上げたら枝のせいで空はパズルみたい
どんな言葉で君を繋ぎとめられるの？
We look up, and through the branches the sky is like a puzzle
What words will it take to keep you with me?
~*~

       He heard the turning of a key in the lock just as the last rays of sunlight faded, followed by Shin’s call of “Tadaima!” Nao didn’t reply, waiting until the guitarist was walking cautiously into the darkened room before tackling him.

 

       “Okaeri!”

 

       He observed the look of frozen surprise on the other’s face with unholy glee.

 

“Arrgh!”

      

They went down in a mass of tangled limbs.

      

“I win,” Nao announced from his seat on Shin’s tummy after a few minutes of good-natured fighting and tickling. The blond rolled his eyes in response.

      

“You ambushed me,” he accused.

      

“Yup,” Nao chirped, bouncing on his throne. “That’s why I’m on top and you’re pinned like a roach.”

   

Shin decided not to counter that point. When the bassist showed no signs of budging, he raised an eyebrow and asked, “Aren’t you going to let me up?”

      

He regretted the question when Nao’s grin turned wider and too innocent to be sincere.

      

“Of course…”

      

Shin waited patiently for the catch.

      

“…on one condition.”

      

“…I knew it.”

      

He waited expectantly, but the brunette fell silent, seemingly unsure of how to phrase his request. He was finger-combing his hair unconsciously, usually a sign of nervousness for the bassist.

      

Wait. Was he actually nervous?

      

The thought was unsettling. Any questions on his part were forestalled when Nao shook his head, and seemed to get hold of his bearings. He offered Shin an apologetic smile.

      

“Just thinking. Um, right. It’s Tanabata Matsuri tomorrow. Remember that annual parade down by the river? Well, the procession’s always so beautiful, the view’s great from the banks and everyone’s going… ”

      

He’d started by stating the obvious and knew he was now babbling, but that didn’t mean he could stop it. His tongue forged on with a mind of it’s own.

      

“Anyway. The guys are all going and I thought…”

 

Nao trailed off at the carefully blank look on Shin’s face. The bassist sighed, knowing what was coming next. The guitarist’s sigh was, if possible, even heavier than his own.

 

“Gomen Naoran,” he murmured as one hand stroked the brunette’s arm. “We’re still having that family gathering this year. I have to be present.”

 

“Mmm,” he acceded, the way he’d done for the past few years. Then a genuine smile lit his features when Shin cupped his face softly and pulled him down for a kiss.

 

“Okaeri,” he repeated in a breathless whisper.

 

~*~
強い風が吹いて笑う　飛べそうになる
The strong wind blows, and we laugh
It's as if we can fly
~*~

       When he woke the next morning, Shin had already left to meet his immediate family at the station. Nao sulked a little and was about to roll over and flatten the blond’s pillow in retribution when a note penned in the blond’s distinctive scrawl caught his eye.

 

       ‘Had to run, didn’t want to wake you. Will be back at night – have fun.

PS: Look in the kitchen.

-- Shin       

 

He spared the pillow and got up, wrapping the blanket around himself in addition to the over-sized sweater he had on before padding into the kitchen. The sight that greeted him didn’t register in his sleep-hazed mind at first; he froze in mid-yawn when it finally did. Shin had made breakfast, a rare occurrence in itself due to Kagrra,’s general lack of culinary skills with the exception of Izumi. He had also done both their shares of the household chores, leaving the bassist free to enjoy his break. Last but not least, there was a small pile of gifts waiting on the kitchen table. A closer inspection told him that Shin had bought him almost everything he’d wished for.

 

Nao sank into the nearest chair in a daze, scarcely noticing that his blanket had fallen off long ago.

 

“This is good enough,” he informed the blue crane perched over him with a laugh.

 

Another hastily scribbled note was wedged beneath a new Gameboy and he reached for it.

 

‘Can’t do anything about the burger. Go bug Izumi and get me one too while you’re at it.’

 

Nao’s laugh rang through the breezy apartment, a silver sound borne on the wind. He wondered, briefly, if Shin could hear him.

 

~*~
きっと数え切れない光で二人が千切れてくのはなぜ？
悲しみのツタに絡まる僕はこのまま　このまま　わからないまま
Amid the myriad of light, why is it the two of us must surely fall apart?
Entwined in vines of misery, I'll just go on
I'll just go on, without knowing
~*~
      

       Song. Laughter. Snatches of conversation. Flashes of light and colour. The sensations made him feel heady, drunk on the festive atmosphere… Or maybe it was just the few cans of beer he’d downed. Isshi was laughing too hard at some joke Izumi told and Nao grinned when one of his friend’s flailing hands smacked Akiya in the face. The vocalist definitely had too much to drink.

 

       “Don’t you think so, Naoran?” giggled Isshi, tugging on his sleeve. Izumi was hastily hiding the remaining cans of beer while their vocalist’s back was turned.

 

       “Yup,” he answered, even though he had no idea what the other was talking about. He watched as Isshi turned to Akiya with a triumphant grin and stuck a wavering finger in the redhead’s face.

 

       “See! Naoran thinks so too. You have a chubby face!” He broke into another round of giggles at the guitarist’s affronted look, while Nao quickly pretended to be absorbed in the task of clearing up the remains of their picnic.

 

       “You said you didn’t care,” grumbled Akiya as the singer jabbed his left cheek.

 

       “You’re right. I don’t.”

 

He scooted over to lean on Akiya’s back, laughing when the other pretended to move away. Izumi shot a glance at Nao, knowing how his friend could be affected by these little gestures of affection when Shin was obviously absent. Unlike the previous years, however, the brunette’s expression was one of contentment. The drummer opened his mouth, about to ask, but stopped himself – it was better left unsaid. He continued packing up, this time with a smile.

 

“Akki?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Get me a drink?”

 

The redhead dumped Isshi unceremoniously in Nao’s lap then stood, rolling his eyes.

 

“We really need to stock up on something besides beer,” he declared before disappearing in the direction of the nearest convenience store.

 

Isshi was waving lazily after him when a gleam of silver caught his eye and he blinked, shifting so he could find the source and digging his elbow into Nao’s thigh in the process.

 

“Ow! Isshi, get off— huh?”

 

The vocalist had hooked a slender finger onto his new necklace and was drawing it over for a closer look. A simple ring dangled on the fine chain, just a plain band of silver that winked in the fading sunlight. Nao had found it in a tiny box, tucked inconspicuously in the pile of presents, as if Shin had been hesitant about the gift.

 

He loved it. Not so much about the gift itself rather than its implications.

 

“I’m glad,” Isshi’s warm voice drew him out of his thoughts. He offered no more than the simple sentence except a knowing smile, which the bassist returned. The necklace was tucked back under his shirt and it dangled, warm against his skin. They sat in companionable silence for a while until Izumi jolted Nao out of his personal bubble of happiness by smacking his head.

 

“Ow! What now?” scowled the bassist. His long-time friend grinned back, completely undeterred by the dark glare sent his way.

 

“Here,” he said, tossing Nao his car keys. “Go put the stuff back in the car. They’ll get trampled once the fireworks start and I don’t want to buy another picnic basket.”

 

“You do it.”

 

“I did all the cleaning and packing and prepared the food, remember?”

 

“…damn.”

 

“Off you go, Naoran.”

 

Resignedly picking up the heavy basket, Nao stuck out his tongue at the laughing drummer and headed for the car park. For some time, he just drifted along with the crowd, basking in a private moment of contentment.

 

/I should get him something too./

 

Something to show that he understood the meaning behind the gesture. But what? Frowning when a few minutes of brainstorming showed no results, Nao decided to set the matter aside in favour of more pressing issues. Such as the location of the damned car park – where was he anyway? Hopelessly lost after fifteen minutes of walking and retracing his footsteps, an attempt to ask for directions led him to a different car park and further away from his destination. His arm ached from the weight and the brunette sank into the nearest bench he could find, still plotting ways of getting back at Izumi.

 

/Guess I’ll just wait for someone to find me./

 

He stretched out his legs and leant back, looking wide-eyed at the boundless sky. Rain clouds were looming in the far-off distance, menacingly dark, but hopefully rain would not fall before the fireworks display scheduled to start at 8. Letting his eyes flutter close, Nao grasped the ring and smiled. He was almost asleep when childish giggles woke him. A timid finger poked his side as he sat up groggily to see two young girls, no older than 10, peeking curiously at him from behind their uchiwa. They squealed when he grinned and mock-swiped at their faces, then scurried away laughing. The bassist watched them go. It was late, he realized, and Izumi would be worried by now. Sighing, he picked up the basket again and was about to try finding his way back when there was a familiar flash of bleached hair. The bassist whipped around so fast that he almost took off the head of a stray dog with his picnic basket. He bounded towards the blond tufts, determinedly keeping them in sight over the heads of the crowd around him.

 

“Shin!”

 

The guitarist didn’t seem to hear his call. Nao blinked at the sight; Shin was looking more than a bit irritated as he spoke to a woman clutching a pen and a worn notebook. His back faced Nao, who had to strain his ears to catch what he was saying.

 

“…so…I don’t…”

 

The woman was now looking slightly nervous, as did the rest of the people huddled around them. An elderly woman – he thought he recognized her as Shin’s mother – tugged on the blond’s sleeve and shot him a warning glance, which was all but ignored.

 

/What’s going on?/

 

Nao hesitated. Like a moth drawn to fire, he stubbornly continued to press on towards Shin. The cold wind brought him snippets of conversation.

 

“…just curious…” A defensive retort from the woman.

 

The next thing he heard was painfully clear.

   

“Well, you guessed wrong. We’re not together. Nao and I are just friends. Why the hell can’t friends share an apartment?”

      

He didn’t even notice that he’d frozen in the middle of the path. People were pushing, jostling past him. Their laughter was too loud, the spinning lights too bright. The colourful swirls of yukata sleeves made him sick. Everything else was perfect, so perfect though the ring hanging from his neck weighed more than a ton of bricks.

      

He didn’t understand.

      

He didn’t want to.

      

Without another word, Nao turned and fled.

 

~*~
柔らかい陽溜まりでこわいほど透けてく太陽は
反射して黒い点になった
In our gentle patch of sunlight, the eerily transparent sun
reflects and becomes a point of blackness
~*~

Shin was bored. Listening with half an ear as his mother prattled on about the financial woes of yet another relative, he silently counted to ten to ensure she was already too worked up to notice he wasn’t paying attention, before fixing a blank look on his face and promptly zoning out.

 

…Family. You miss them after months of absence, but sometimes a few hours together are enough to make you feel like getting away again. At least it’s not so bad when there’s someone waiting for you at home. An almost imperceptible smile lit his face at that thought. Nao would have found the necklace by now; he wondered what the brunette thought of it.

 

/Most likely he won’t know what to think./

 

Shin shook his head at that wry thought. He himself wasn’t sure what was going through his mind when he bought it. All he knew was that the ring, half-hidden in a corner of the shop window, had somehow caught his attention and held it; he thought of Nao then and had felt a sudden urge to stake his claim.

 

“…she’s been very eager to meet you.”

 

/Huh?/

 

Shin blinked, a young woman with glasses and a practised smile was bowing to him while his mother made the introductions. He hurriedly bowed back, trying to recall the lost thread of the mostly one-sided conversation.

 

“Nagakawa-san is the daughter of your father’s friend. You may have heard of her before, she’s a reporter and she’s written some music reviews too.”

 

“Pleased to meet you,” the reporter smiled, revealing two rows of sparkling white teeth. They shook hands and Shin noticed that her nails were immaculately manicured.

 

“Right,” Shin’s mother beamed and got up to offer her seat to Nagakawa. “I’ll let you two talk.”

 

She left, leaving an awkward silence in her wake.

 

“So,” Nagakawa began conversationally. “You’re Kagrra,’s guitarist?”

 

“Yes…”

 

“I like your band.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

They lapsed into silence again. Shin’s eyes wandered to the other side of the posh restaurant, where several of his aunts had gathered to gossip, and half-heartedly wished that he could join them. Anything to get away from this woman and her plastic smiles. Her name did sound familiar now; he remembered reading some of her music reviews, in which she had mercilessly tore down the music of various indie bands. She was, he recalled with a wince, also infamous for delving into artistes’ private lives and publishing those tidbits of information in gossip magazines.

 

Better to make up an excuse and flee.

 

“Ano—”

 

“May I ask you a few questions please? Nothing too personal, just some information on your music.”

 

Damn. At times like this he wished their manager was here. He wanted to say no.

 

“…yes.”

 

~*~
微かな音　耳をすます心の底へ
A dim noise
I strain my ears to the depths of my heart...
~*~

 

       Half an hour later, he was seriously considering jabbing his chopsticks into Nagakawa’s eyes. The idea of stuffing the saltshaker into her red-painted mouth was rather appealing too.

 

       /Nothing too personal, my ass./

 

       She had launched smoothly into a barrage of prying questions after the first few minutes of their casual interview. Shin found himself constantly on guard, weighing all his words before speaking and trying to evade some questions without being too obvious. They sat across each other, eyes locked in silent combat. The blond felt as though he was a particularly juicy steak that she was after.

 

“So you don’t argue within the band at all?” asked the reporter, sounding disappointed.

 

“No,” came the firm reply. He shifted subtly to look over her shoulder at the clock. Almost eight; they would be heading outside to watch the fireworks display soon and he would finally be rid of her.

 

“No musical differences at all? Not even when any members turn up late?” she persisted, peering at him over her notebook with shifty eyes. “I heard that Nao-san has a tendency to do so.”

 

“No,” he repeated, irritated by now, fingers clutching the wooden chopsticks out of their own accord. “I wake him when we have early practise sessions.”

 

He realized his mistake when her eyes brightened, then narrowed like a hawk sighting its prey.

 

“You live together.” Her tone made it a statement instead of a question, and he knew it was too late to deny it. There was a quizzical look from his parents as they overheard their conversation; his heart sank – he hadn’t told them he was living with Nao, much less the fact that he had a boyfriend.

 

“Don’t you think it’s… unusual for two grown men to live together? Since Kagrra, is doing so well I doubt you have financial problems, ne?” The second sentence was spoken in a honey-layered tone. The tip of her ballpoint pen hovered anxiously over her notebook as he struggled for a way out of this unexpected situation, cursing inwardly when more of his relatives began looking in their direction.

 

“No, I don’t think it’s strange,” replied Shin finally, voice hollow. The answer sounded lame in his own ears.

 

“Well, I’ll get to my point. I’ve heard from some sources that you and Nao-san are couple,” Nagakawa stated bluntly. There were a few gasps from his aunts as she stared at him with challenging eyes. “Is that true, Shin-san?”

      

There was a titter of high-pitched laughter from his mother, as if she had just been told a distasteful joke but was too polite to say so. It quickly faded when he failed to deliver a decisive denial. Shin’s mind raced for something, anything to say; anything to lift the silence hanging over them like a guillotine. It weighed on him, heavy and suffocating, until he just couldn’t seem to find the answer in his heart.

 

“’kaasan!”

 

The sudden cheerful shout sounded like a gunshot, making several people jerk. One of his young cousins burst through the door in her pink yukata and ran towards his aunt, face smudged with strands of melted candy floss. Her mother seemed almost relieved for the sudden intrusion even as Nagakawa shot her a barely concealed glare.

 

“’kaasan! The fireworks are starting, hurry hurry hurry!” She broke off giggling and started tugging her mother towards the exit.

 

“Ano… I suppose we better go?” suggested his mother tentatively.

 

Shin got up without a word and stalked out the door, ignoring the dark look on his father’s face and the whispers among his relatives. He was just a few steps from the restaurant when she caught up with him again, somehow managing to meet his furious pace in her high heels. The rest trailed after them uncertainly.

 

“Shin-san!”

 

He kept walking.

 

“Shin-san, wait!” She was following him with the dogged determination of a wolf stalking injured prey. He refused to answer, wouldn’t even look at her. The delicious scents from food stalls by the road combined with the mess of his emotions made him nauseous.

 

He wanted badly to see Nao.

 

“Shin-san,” called Nagakawa breathlessly, running forward to plant herself squarely in his way. “Please answer my question.”

      

He stood still for a moment before lifting his gaze, bringing a triumphant smile to her face until she noticed the sudden fire in the blond’s eyes.

      

“Is this part of your job description, or are you just a bitch?”

      

“Excuse me?”

      

She faltered, taken aback by the sudden reproach from the normally quiet guitarist.

      

“How would you like it if someone pried into your private life in public? Whatever I do in my free time is none of your business, so I don’t have to answer any of your questions. Nagakawa-san, you are accomplishing nothing except establishing your reputation as an annoying minion of the media. Now go bother someone else.”

      

He watched with grim satisfaction as she blushed. His family had caught up with them and now stood nervously in a half-circle while his mother wringed her hands, chagrined by this sudden turn of events. People around them were starting to pay attention; he could feel their curious stares.

      

“Shin-san, that was completely unnecessary,” Nagakawa retorted, defiance lacing her voice though her face was still burning. “I was merely curious. Of course I won’t force you to answer my questions—” Shin snorted at that. “—and what I said regarding your relationship with Nao-san was just a guess.” She deliberately emphasized the word ‘relationship’ and was giving him yet another challenging look. Sensing trouble, his mother quickly moved to tug on his sleeve, a gesture he ignored. There was a small crowd gathered by now, no doubt some recognized him and he answered, coldly and automatically.

 

“Well, you guessed wrong. We’re not together. Nao and I are just friends. Why the hell can’t friends share an apartment?”

 

She deflated, shoulders slumping with disappointment and started to bow, offering half-hearted apologies that he brushed aside. The relieved laughter from his parents made his gut twist. He had given the safest answer in a bid to avoid complicating matters… he’d made the right decision, hadn’t he? But the feeling of unease still refused to leave him. Staring blankly into the distance, Shin never noticed the distressed brunette running away from the riverside.

 

Right on cue, fireworks spangled the clouded night sky.

 

~*~
きっとただ僕等は忘れてく　君の声が響くのはなぜ？
悲しみのツタに絡まる僕はここから　ここから　手を伸ばす
Since both of us will surely just forget, why is it that your voice still echoes?
Entwined in vines of misery, from here
From here I'll be reaching out
~*~

       It did rain after all.

 

       Nao looked out at the dark city, body folded up on the windowsill like his origami cranes, one cheek pressed to the cool pane. He His keitai rang insistently and he considered answering it – the persistent caller had rang 4 times already – but couldn’t make himself budge. Rain hit the windowpane in sheets, warping his view as his breath fogged up a patch of glass. One hand traced random patterns on the window; the other held his necklace limply. He’d wanted to throw it away, fling it far from him and watch it get swallowed by the crowd, but somehow the thought of never finding it again had made his already hurting chest constrict.

 

       So he kept it – a painful reminder.

 

       He didn’t want to think, didn’t want to remember, even though he could still hear the echoes of Shin’s voice in his head.

       “We’re not together. Nao and I are just friends.”

 

       He still didn’t understand.

===

    “How long can it possibly take to locate the damned car park?” groaned Izumi when his latest attempt to call Nao failed again. “He’s been gone for hours!”

 

       Akiya laid a hand on Izumi’s shoulder, trying to calm their anxious leader though his own brow was creased with worry.

 

       “Maybe he just decided to go home.”

 

       Isshi paused in the task of wringing out his long hair and shot him a look, a lot more sober now after getting doused in the rain.

 

       “And miss the fireworks? Not likely. I don’t like this… Has anyone called Shin?”

 

       Izumi shook his head, wet bangs trailing droplets of water.

 

       “He’s having that family gathering of his again. I don’t want to bother him, for all we know Naoran just wandered off and got lost.”

 

       “That’s serious enough,” snorted Akiya. “Knowing Nao I doubt he’ll find his way back before morning.”

 

       They huddled closer to each other under the shelter of the bus stop, momentarily at a loss for ideas. Izumi’s sigh was barely audible over the patter of raindrops on the steel roof.

 

       “C’mon, we might as well start walking to the station. I’ll call Shin.”

===

       How long had he been sitting there? The sky was still dark, the rain still pouring, and Shin was still not home. In the dim light the wishes on the bamboo stalks were no more than wisps of white, ghosts amid the branches. He strained his eyes, but couldn’t make out the single blue crane in the dark. It was late, almost ten; rain continued to pelt the city and he remembered that Shin had forgotten to bring an umbrella. The brunette couldn’t help but feel a twinge of worry. Uncurling himself with some effort, the bassist’s gaze fell on the ring in his hand and determination – or was it stubbornness? – filled him.

 

       “We’re not together. Nao and I are just friends.”

 

He still didn’t understand, didn’t want to either, but a part of him needed to know.

 

Pulling a jacket over his damp clothes, he grabbed an umbrella and, after some hesitation, fastened the necklace around his neck. He left, narrowly missing Izumi’s soaked basket in the genkan. The door shut softly behind him.

===

    “It was a mistake to invite her,” his mother was saying. “All those questions… how embarrassing!”

      

Murmurs of agreement from his father. Shin tried to tune them out, focusing on the blurry scenery outside the car instead. As much as he tried to forget it, his own words haunted him, though he had successfully warded off Nagakawa and saved his love life from being plastered across magazine covers.

      

The familiar sight of the train station loomed ahead and Shin greeted it with relief, glad that the day was almost over. He missed Nao. After parking his car – our car, the guitarist reminded himself – he strolled towards the station with his parents to send them off.

      

“This is really like the old days,” remarked his father fondly as the three of them crowded under his mother’s bright yellow umbrella. Shin grinned in response.

      

“My hair wasn’t blond then.”

      

“Someday,” sighed his mother dreamily, slipping her hand into her husband’s. “We would walk in the rain like this with our grandchildren.”

      

He nodded and squeezed her hand, not noticing the look on his son’s face. Shin swallowed, feeling a cold lump settle on his heart at the mention of grandchildren.

      

He needed to tell them… they had to know.

      

“So,” his father began, heartily slapping his back. “Do you have a girlfriend? Met anyone yet?”

      

“…I have,” he half-whispered, wincing when they turned to him in surprise and excitement.

      

“Really? You should have told us sooner!” laughed the elderly woman as she ruffled his hair affectionately. “Who is she?”

      

His heart was thumping with trepidation and, in spite of the situation, hope.

      

“’Kaasan… the person I’ve chosen isn’t a girl.”

      

Rain drowned the confused silence that followed.

      

“What do you mean?” The older man forced a laugh and attempted to joke. “Don’t tell me that Nagakawa was right and Nao-kun’s your other half.”

      

/Here it comes./

      

He took a deep breath before meeting their incredulous gazes squarely.

      

“He is.”

      

The two words were softly spoken, but for all their effect he might as well have screamed them into a microphone. Both his parents froze, jaw dropping in shock as his serious expression reflected the sincerity of his words, head held high. For a moment he thought the three of them would hold their positions forever; then his mother let out a wounded little moan and clung to her husband for support. The sound cut him to the core and he reached for her, intending to sooth her but the expression of irrational anger on his father’s face stopped him. Shin froze, shocked by the intensity of that look.

 

“You… how could you…” a violent shake of her head cut off the rest of the sentence. Shin watched helplessly as his father wrapped a supportive arm around his wife and moved away, leaving the blond in the rain. Through his rapidly soaking bangs, he saw his own disappointment and hurt mirrored on their lined faces. The space between them had never felt wider, so he stood in the rain and dejected silence, missing the shelter of the yellow umbrella. His father heaved a heavy sigh and was about to say something when he paused, having caught sight of something over Shin’s shoulder, and directed his glare there instead. The puzzled blond turned and bumped into a warm chest. Nao stood behind him, shielding him from the rain with a worn blue umbrella.

 

“Naoran! Why are you here?” exclaimed the guitarist, wondering why his boyfriend refused to meet his gaze.

 

The bassist didn’t reply, simply meeting Shin’s parents’ accusing stares with a bemused look of his own.

 

/What the hell happened here?/

 

“Is it true that you’re my son’s boyfriend?” asked the older man bluntly.

 

All of a sudden, the brunette was seeing the evening’s events in a new light. Replaying the scene he had witnessed in his mind, he realized what might have caused Shin to say those words behind his back.

 

/Could it be…?/

 

He was afraid to ask.

 

The realization prompted him to think before speaking, though he would have answered truthfully on any other day. Looking at Shin’s parents warily, he tried to decide on an appropriate response, unaware that his boyfriend had already revealed the truth of their relationship. Hoping he had made the right choice, Nao said, “Nope. Whatever made you think that?”

 

He flashed a disarming grin, completely missing the look of surprise and hurt flitting across Shin’s face as his own words were unwittingly thrown back at him. The grin faded, replaced by unease as the guitarist’s mother straightened, gesturing at her son with a wildly triumphant smile on her face.

 

“He denies it! What have you got to say now?”

 

The blond stayed silent. Nao clutched the shorter man’s sleeve; more than a bit unnerved by the way things were going. Shin noticed that the bassist’s hair and back were getting wet since he was using most of their tiny umbrella to shield him, and with a reassuring smile, he gently pushed the handle towards Nao.

 

“Keep it. I’m already soaked anyway.”

 

He stepped out of the shelter without another word and stood in front of the brunette, as if trying to protect him from the hostile glares. Nao was left clutching the umbrella and gaping at his boyfriend’s back. Looking at the elderly couple, he saw that they had directed their piercing stares at Shin, still waiting for their answer.

 

Something in him melted in that instant.

 

The percussive drumming of raindrops on vinyl faded as the bassist carelessly flung down his umbrella. Decisive strides brought him beside Shin and he peered through his wet bangs at the shorter man, trying to make out his features through the cloud of rain between them. One hand fumbled for and found the guitarist’s fingers. He clutched them tight, smiling when he felt Shin return the pressure. Wordlessly they stood, side by side – their interlaced fingers provided the answer.

 

~*~
雨が降った　見上げてる僕等が空へ落ちてく気がした
The rain has fallen
And staring up, I get the feeling that we've fallen towards the sky...
~*~

       The bassist didn’t know how long it’d taken before Shin’s father finally let loose an explosive sigh. He watched the man take his wife by her elbow and gently steer her away towards the train station. They never looked back. He stood, half-leaning on Shin’s shoulder, holding his hand until he was sure that the droplets on the blond’s face were no more than rainwater. The falling rain gave him the illusion that they were falling, falling towards the sky.

 

       And that was how the rest found them later. The upturned umbrella had been filled by then, the raindrops made water spill over the sides to play a merry melody on the sidewalk.

 

       “There you are,” cried Izumi when he recognized the two bedraggled figures under the streetlight. The two whirled around and blinked slowly, their expressions were those of someone who had just woken up from a deep dream. The relieved drummer gave both a quick once-over, noted the absence of his basket and would have said more if Isshi hadn’t stomped on his foot. He was left hopping gingerly on one leg to the sound of Akiya’s muffled laughter while their vocalist hurried up to the pair.

 

       “A lot’s happened ne,” he murmured at Nao’s sheepish grin, then smiled when he saw their linked hands. “But I suppose everything’s turned out fine. Alright!” He spun around to wave Akiya and Izumi over, looking like a cute patched-up teddy bear in the redhead’s oversized sweater. “We found them and their car. That means a free ride home!”

 

       Cheers all around. They were strolling away when Akiya tapped Nao’s forehead, saying, “You forgot your umbrella.”

 

       “Hmm? Oh yeah…” He reached for the handle and heaved, much to the horror of everyone else.

 

       “Don’t—”

 

       “Naoran STOP—”

 

       SPLASH.

 

       All five were now, if possible, even wetter than before. The brunette observed this fact with no small amount of unease and guilt, which quickly turned into alarm when his bandmates smirked and advanced upon him as one.

 

He took off through the rain with the rest of Kagrra, right behind him.

 

~*~
きっと数え切れない光で二人が千切れてくのはなぜ？
悲しみのツタに絡まる僕はこのまま　このままだよ
Amid the myriad of light, why is it the two of us must surely fall apart?
Entwined in vines of misery, I'll just go on
I'll just go on
~*~

    Something between them had changed. He could tell that much, even if everything seemed so perfect from the outside. In a way, the guitarist was glad – he believed there was no such thing as a perfect relationship; it just didn’t happen that way. If one was to be established, some confounded fact would start up and knock it down.

 

       Something had changed. Not for the better, nor was it for the worse. Just… different.

 

       Thinking back on the unplanned confrontation with his parents, questions still filled his mind at Nao’s initial reply. They were questions that he knew he would never ask. He sensed the same with the bassist, but wasn’t about to make him tell either, because the unknown felt strangely comfortable.

 

       Walking into their bedroom, he saw the brunette perched on the windowsill, absently toying with a blue paper crane. The bamboo stalks they’d yet to get rid of swayed gently over them as he stooped to give Nao an affectionate hug. When they parted, Nao gave him a playful lick on the cheek. Shin blinked when he felt a small box pressed into his palm. His boyfriend was looking expectantly at him, so he pried the cardboard top open.

 

       Its contents made his heart soar. So things were different now; so what? They could just go on.

 

       “Thank you.”

 

~*~
きっといつも君は知らなくて　手を繋いでも遠くにいて
悲しみのツタが巻き上がる空　零れる光に埋もれてく　埋もれてく
And it's you that I'll surely never understand
Though I clasp your hand, you're still so far away
The sky that twines the vines of misery
Buries us, buries us in its overflowing light
~*~
      

       Nao watched as Shin’s face lit up in a rare smile, glad that he had managed to track down the exact ring and chain after several hours of stubbornly wandering the streets with a reluctant Izumi. He scooted over to make space for Shin on the narrow windowsill, giggling when the blond slid off on the first attempt. Hand in hand, they gazed out at the city, each lost in their own thoughts. It was then when he acknowledged that there would always be something about the other that he wouldn’t know about, that there would always be questions he didn’t want to ask – after all, how can you ever know another person’s soul completely? The realization was accepted ruefully, but with complete trust.

 

       Things may be different now, but he knew it didn’t change a thing.

 

       “Ne, Shin-chan…”

 

       “Hmm?”

 

       “I feel like going out. The day’s too beautiful to waste.”

 

    “Sure.”

 

       Neither moved though, too content to just sit in each other’s company. Nao lifted the pale blue paper crane.

 

       “Ne, Shin-chan? I made a secret wish on Tanabata Matsuri,” he waved the origami bird and made it hit Shin’s nose with one wing.

 

       “So did it come true?”

 

       “Nope,” he smiled warmly. “But I got something better.”

 

       He snuggled up to Shin and held the crane outside the open window.

 

       “So I can let it go now.”

 

       A quick flick of his wrist, a flash of pure blue.

 

       They watched as the paper crane was borne on the wind, sailing over the city until it was lost against the bright blue sky.

 

~*~

蒼い鳥が飛ぶような晴れた綺麗な日です
It's the kind of beautiful, clear day on which a blue bird might fly
~*~

 

END