Nothing today, biznatch.






I'm fascinated by the amount of wrestlers kissing my ass. But I am also not surprised, since most of these wrestlers are kissing my ass because they know I can fucking crack there face open and break their neck. I have decided to give these wrestlers grades. Guess what, guys? Lots of people hate me. And I'm glad! I hope you can hate me and call me an asshole lots of times. Thing is. I REALLY DON'T GIVE TWO SHITS.

Marshall Gates. You aren't a fucking legend, bitch. Get over it. Try saying you are something that's fucking original. You've won what? four matches in RWA? Some fucking legend. I'm a legend you stupid bitch, but I don't run around screaming in like an asshole. So shut the fuck up please, and you will be rewarded with a chocolate chip cookie. For this you receive a F.

Cody Carson. Fuck no. I'll never tag with a nigger, and someone who is such a pussy that is into that "lets be together shit" with his wife. You know what, Carson? Tell your wife to go fuck herself for once. Try it, bitch. Too worried she'll get divorced with you? That just proves that you wouldn't be able to find someone better than that fugly piece of ass. I rather fuck a rabbit, than that. Holy fucking christ. Oh, and I know I am going to be in the finals already. Why? BECAUSE I AM ONE OF THE BEST FUCKING WRESTLERS IN THIS RUMBLE, YOU NAIVE LITTLE FUCK. AND YOU ARE NOT A GOOD WRESTLER. For having the heart you have you receiver an F.

Mash. Please. Just stop talking. You + too much brain activity = bad. It could hurt you, but most importantly you are making everyone that matters stupider by the minute. I really don't want to know what you think about yourself. You think you are good? Well. I know everything and you are wrong. YOU SUCK YOUR FATHERS BALLS. Go hang yourself. Jesus christ you are so fucking awful you don't even deserve to be graded by me.

Andrew Flash. Just like Mash you should never be aloud to speak ever again. If you ever find a women who will give you a shot at going out with her, i'm sure the next day she'll poison you with a pill in your coffee. You actually receiver an F for being about 3/10 better than Mash.

Kimberly Jamison. A rookie who shows a lot of potential. Wait. Fuck that. Have you FUCKING SEEN HER? She's the hottest bitch in RWA, and I wouldn't mind wrestling her any night of the week. For that she receives an A.

Seth Dryden. A very good wrestler I can see from SFT. A

The Captain. I do not need to stress enough about how cool you are for trying to be a fucking pirate. But your wrestling skills are horrendous. Fuck W-L you have beaten nobodies. Simply F.

Eric Badger. Just like The Captain. You are a fucking badger. But still. F.

Deacon Cage. Yes, Deacon Cage. You beat me. Horray for you being gay. Would you like a gold star? Yet I am still a better wrestler than you. Why? BECAUSE I FUCKING SAID SO. Again I say this. You've accomplished lots, yes I will give you that. BUT YOU ALSO HAVE BEATEN NOBODIES. The only people even mentioning you beat was me, which was obviously a fluke. F you silly bastard.

Chris Angel. Ugh. F. And all the other faggots. You all get F's.



"Wait. Dude. You fucked your girlfriend's sister while your girlfriend was in the same HOUSE?"

"Yeah, bitch."

"How did this all start?"

"Well..."

.flashback.

I sat in my eclipse spider with my girlfriend Blair. We were driving to her sister's mediocre house. Blair has told me lots of things about her sister, including that she wasn't too pretty and told me to be nice to her. Of course, Blair was beautiful but she has no personality whatsoever. So her sister couldn't be a really fugly fatass. Why were we going to her sisters home? I have no fucking idea. The whole.. "Wahhh. I need to be around my family. Wahhh." Fucking annoying shit. Blair was wearing a halter top and short shorts.

"Why are we going here again?" I asked impatiently as the driver in front of me was doing 35 miles per hour on a 50 speed limit road.

"Her boyfriend just broke up with her, and she needs emotional support."

"So tell me again. Why am I going here?"

"Because.. Uhh... I don't really know."

"Makes sense," I sarcastically replied.

We arrived at the nicely sized house, and walked inside of it. There was clothes, and beer, and shit all over the house. I saw a beautiful blonde women walk out from the hallway. She was wearing a white bikini with a pink hawaiian flower in her long shiny blonde hair. She had on a mini jean material skirt, with what I imagined was the bottom to her bikini. She seemed to have some tears in her eyes, as Blair ran up and greeted her with a big huge hug. I still hadn't known the name of Blair's sister, but I could see she was very fucking hot. Not to mention her bright icey blue eyes complimented by dark eyeshadow and makeup. She looked over her sisters shoulder, and saw myself standing on her bottom stair and it seems like all the tears went away and her life brightened up. A big smile went on her face, but when they finished hugging she tried to look sad and put some more tears into her eyes. Blair tried to wipe away a few of the tears. Blair's sister stood a couple inches taller than Blair at around 5'8", 5'9", with long smooth legs.

"You look great," Blair's sister said happily to Blair.

"Ahem," I said getting myself into the conversation. "Hello. I'm Chris. It's a pleasure to meet you, Gwen."

"Oh the pleasure is all mine, Chris," she replied in a seductive way.

And I stepped up and gave her a little kiss on the cheak and a huge. She felt my arms wrap around her body and I felt her shiver. She place her warm lips on the side of my face and gave me a little kiss. I could already feel Blair's jealousy level going up. I released the hug, and heard Blair sigh. We all sat down in the living room. I helped myself to a beer.

"So where do you work, Chris?" She asked me, after she calmed down from all the fake tears.

"Well. I am currently employed with the Renegade Wrestling Association as a tactical wrestling expert."

"So you beat down guys with chairs?"

"To put it lightly, yes."

"I think I'm going to go pick up a pizza now and let you to get acquainted," Blair said.

I handed her my keys and she walked out the door. I looked out the window just to make sure she was gone, and I slowly got up, as did Gwen. She now stood looking up at me.

"I've wanted you to fuck me since the first day I saw you in RWA. Fuck Blair."

She roughly pushed me against the wall and starting kissing me. I stopped her for a minute and put my hand to her lips which were filled with lip gloss.

"Aren't you the one who just broke up with her boyfriend?"

"Fuck no. I milk all the cash from him. Haven't had sex with the bastard in months. I just keep his sorry ass around for money."

"Ah. Carry on," I said very anxious to continue.

We continued kissing, when she starting to unbutton my shirt, revealing my well built chest.

.end flashback.

Me, and few buddies of mine(james, brad, and derek yes titus formerly of rwa) sat around a table, with cards in our hands, money on the table, beer on the table and cigars in our mouth.

"So then what happened?" Brad implored.

"That was it. We fucked and Blair didn't find out." I responded, as we started a new hand, five card stud.

The dealer at the time(james) delt the cards and I ended up with an ace, a king and a queen all of diamonds. Titus raised fifty dollars. James and Brad immediatley folded, since they are poor. Pussies. I could sense Titus was bluffing so i raised another fifty and the bastard folded right away. I win.

"A fucking high card and you folded like a pussy," I barked.

"How long have you been fucking Gwen?" Titus asked.

"'Bout a month," I responded.

"And how has no one known about this?"

"I've done my best to keep her off camera."

"And why is this?" Titus is a fucking shithead. Stop asking so many god damn questions. Am I being fucking interigated.

"Because, shithead, Blair is a bitch and won't leave, and will ask for money," I seethed

"But you're not married."

"She'll find a fucking way to get money, don't you worry. No personality plus money hungry bitch equals bad combination. Almost like Brooke. But the thing is. I actually have to fucking give her money for a reason."

"I agree. Cameron wanted..."

"No one cares, dumbfuck."

At that moment my cell phone rang. I stuck my hand in my pocket and opened my flip phone. I looked to see who was calling, and it showed "gwen evans."

"Well boys. I reckon' it's time to pack up... Meaning get the fuck out of here, dickheads."

And they all left. I then answered the cell phone and in the most seductive way I could said, "Hello?"

"Hello, sexy man."

"Hello, sexy lady."

"You know... I'm really bored right now. And I wasn't wondering if you could fill my time right now."

"I'd love to," I said, as I looked out the window and saw Blair's car pulling in. "Fuck. Give me like twenty minutes since your fucking sister just pulled in."

"Deal," Gwen said then I quickly hung up the phone quickly as Blair walked in the door. I was dressed in nice clothing. She was going to be suspicious of where I was going.

"Hello," she said as she walked in the front door.

"Hey," I said.

She had a handful of shopping bags, of course. Bitch. Spending my money!

"Where are you going all spiffed up?" She asked suspiciously.

"With some buddies, to play cards. And I was hoping to meet a chick at a bar too."

She chuckled to herself and said, "Later." I walked out the door thinking about how well that went. I took a step outside into the cool night air, with only my thin button up black shirt, which was unbuttoned and a white undershirt under. I felt the air hit my neck and a shiver went down my spine as I imagined myself having sex with Gwen right now. I put my eclipse spider into driver and sped out of my driveway as fast as I could. Speeding around corners, as fast as I could. I arrived at Gwen's house, in a short time, and waltzed right into her house. She greeted me, and I quickly pushed her gently into the wall, placing my hands around her waiste making there way to her tight ass. He not small, nor big, but firm breasts rubbed against my chest. I started kissing her neck, then picked her up, her legs straddling my waiste.

You don't get to see the rest, junior.