Lacrimae Rerum
By SB Zarben
sbzarben@gmail.com
Disclaimers: These are my characters, my universe, and my fake science.
There will be violence. There will be love between two people of the same gender.
This is the sequel to Amicus Humani Generis, which you really must read first before tackling this one; there is also a short little piece called In Transit which goes between Amicus and this story. It isn't totally necessary that you read it, but it does deal with some characters in a significant way.
Feedback is always met with great excitement on my part, is always responded to, and has a worth incapable of measurement. Any thoughts can be sent to the e-mail address above.
Finally, you can find all my stories and whatnot on my website: http://www.angelfire.com/falcon/sbzarben
Enjoy!
***
Prologue
"Stop."
It was the sound that preceded the command more than the word itself which demanded compliance. A low-grade humming, followed by a click, which stood out from the cacophony engulfing the city because of its ominous nature.
She turned slowly, carefully, cognizant of the fact that one wrong move, one wrong breath would be disastrous. She kept her hands carefully fisted and slightly away from her body, completing the rotation in inches.
When she finally ceased moving she looked directly up into the eyes of her confronter, foregoing a glance at the weapon extended and pointed at her chest.
He was young by their standards, and nervous; he didn't immediately meet her eyes and licked his lips slowly before saying, "Don't make me do this, Janus."
"Ah am not. Ya 'ave a choice. Ya always 'ave a choice."
His eyes flicked around the street and Janus took the opportunity to survey her surroundings, looking for anything that might help. The intersection and its connecting streets were deserted, an odd occurrence considering the last several days. No one would be intervening on this little meeting.
Janus slowly refocused on him as he did the same. Anything could startle him enough for his finger to squeeze the trigger that extract distance. Even anticipating the shot, even with her heightened senses, at this distance she wouldn't be able to avoid it.
"No," he said it quietly, his voice rough, "they're right. You should not have come here. You messed everything up; you're a threat to what we're trying to do." He paused and his face shifted into a disgusted expression. "And you're...not normal."
A sudden explosion a few streets away vibrated the buildings, the ground, their eardrums. Janus watched as his arm jostled and his body jerked in surprise, her own doing the same as her eyes detected the smallest increase in pressure on the trigger.
Despite her previous observations, Janus lunged backwards and to the side, her eyes glued to the weapon as it lit up and discharged.
Chapter 1
7 solar days previous
"What if she does not come?"
"She will."
"But what if she does not?"
Gregor sighed and watched as Nulas continued to pace.
Nulas waved his hand up in the air, cutting Gregor off before he could respond, "I know, I know. I am being circular."
"More like linear."
Nulas blew out a perturbed breath and turned on his heel to settle on a chair. "I just..." He lifted his hands helplessly.
"Why wouldn't she come? She said she would."
"Our relationship has not been the best, lately."
Gregor nodded, "And you think that a few years of fighting wipes out several centuries of good relations?"
Nulas shrugged and scrunched his face up, "She can be hard to predict. She is not above holding a grudge."
"Not for something like this. Trust me Nulas, she'll be here."
The door to the audience room burst inward and a young woman decked out in Nulas's family colours skidded to a halt. "Sir, Janus has arrived."
Gregor grinned and threw a look over his shoulder at Nulas.
Nulas waved his hand in a dismissive gesture and stood, holding back his own smile. "Do not say it."
Gregor quickly schooled his features and gave a serious nod as he fell in a step behind Nulas. "I wouldn't dream of it, sir."
***
Barker tried to close her mouth as they were led through the building, its large open windows allowing a gentle breeze to waft through the hall. The building was stone, a colour that reminded Barker of marble, and although it was hardly the tallest that she had seen in the city there was something about it that spoke of majesty. Perhaps it was the carvings in the stone, many of them she recognized from Janus's skin and others from her recent efforts to learn Janus's language.
When she almost missed a turn and walked into one of the walls she had been gaping at Barker forced herself to pay attention to the man leading them through the hallways. She chanced a look at Janus who had an amused smile on her face.
They stopped outside a large door that the man pushed open before he gestured them inside. Janus and Barker proceeded as the steward closed the door behind them and waited outside.
Barker stopped in her tracks; she'd been expecting a conference room of some sort, a table and chairs, the regular setup. Instead, they were on a large open balcony, semicircular in design, the city and landscape of the planet stretched out before them in a breathtaking display. "Oh, my God."
"Tis beautiful."
Barker could only nod and smile at Janus as she walked slowly to the balustrade and leaned over to look down upon the people below.
"Spectacular view, is it not?"
Barker turned, a little startled, at hearing a male voice. She smiled when she recognized Nulas but hesitated in responding. She ordered her thoughts and finally said, "Yes. I'll never forget it."
Nulas broke into laughter and slapped Janus on the back as he approached Barker and held out his hands. "I see my sister has taught you many things. I commend you on grasping our language so quickly."
Barker took his hands and smiled, "Thank you. I was anxious to learn." And learn she had. Barker had surprised herself at how quickly she had absorbed the language. There were, of course, still many things she had to learn, but she could carry on a conversation with Janus and knew her way around their ship almost as well as Janus did.
They both turned as Janus came up beside them, obviously wanting to get down to business. Nulas smiled once more at Barker and then turned, gesturing at a set of what Barker figured were couches. The threesome had just sat when Gregor came in and greeted them both.
Nulas leaned forward and put his elbows on his knees, "I had hoped that I would not have ta call you here so soon Janus, if at all. Things are...bad."
"'Ow bad?"
Nulas glanced at Gregor who nodded encouragingly from beside his leader. "We have not seen Taykio since I took control. Or," he paused and made a face, "no one is saying they have seen him."
When Nulas failed to continue Gregor took up the slack, "He's out there and we're certain that he's plotting something."
Barker raised her hands, "I'm sorry, but he's going to contest this even though it's legitimate? Nulas is the leader by law, isn't he?"
Gregor nodded, "He is, however, Taykio is not the kind of man to just let this go."
"Why?"
Janus turned to Barker and nibbled her lip for a moment before speaking, "Taykio 'as spent most of 'is life lobbyin' fer power, most of my life. 'E will not give it up easily after gainin' what 'e desired."
"But what's he going to do? Stage a coup?"
There was silence then, and Barker looked between the others as they shifted uncomfortably in their seats. Gregor finally blew out a breath and answered, "It is unlikely that he has enough support to take power by force. And it is doubtful that he will challenge Nulas in the traditional manner, if only because he would then have to challenge Janus as well."
"But ya do not know."
Nulas shook his head, "We know little for sure. Taykio's supporters are tightlipped, their operations extremely secretive. We can not be sure how many people support him, all we have to go on is the number of people who supported me when I took power back."
Janus nodded, impatient, "But what 'as ya concerned? Things seem peaceful."
Gregor and Nulas exchanged a look that went on for quite some time, and it seemed to Janus like they were deciding who should be the one to tell her whatever it was they were going to tell her. She didn't like it. If they were so concerned about her reaction then it really was bad. She felt her stomach start to tighten and her heart start to pound in anticipation.
Gregor finally nodded and stood, heading to the railing and speaking with his back to them. "We've been hearing rumors. Rumors that we have good reason to take seriously. Apparently, Taykio is developing a method of biological warfare."
The stillness was absolute. Barker felt the air rush out of her lungs as her ears seemed to be filled with nothing but white noise. Bio-weapons.
Janus stared at Gregor's back, her eyes unblinking as she tried to process what he had said. It wasn't bad, it was catastrophic. Movement from the corner of her eye finally broke through Janus's shock and she turned to face Nulas.
His expression was bleak, his eyes sad and scared. He nodded once, in a precise manner, like he knew exactly what was running through her mind - disbelief, fear, anxiety - as if he needed to confirm what Gregor had said, validate it with a single gesture, despite knowing it would do little good.
Barker shook her head, her face still slack, "But how could he do that? What kind of bacteria, or virus, or chemical or whatever is out there that could kill you?"
Gregor finally turned from his position and stared right into Barker's eyes, "That's what we're so afraid of."
***
The ceiling was flat and unadorned, with only the usual pock marks associated with rock. It wasn't cold, even though she was sitting in a shelter of stone, and Barker supposed that had more to do with the warm climate of the planet than anything else.
Her brow creased as she wiggled on the bed and put her hands behind her head. She really needed to find out what they called their planet, hell, what they called themselves. Somehow, that had never come up. She found herself suddenly curious.
Janus was somewhere, talking with Nulas she assumed. Barker had opted to leave the meeting, as talk quickly got more detailed until she couldn't follow what they were saying. It was best to let them hash things out and then get the low-down from Janus later when Barker's questions wouldn't be a nuisance.
But...she was bored. With the news of how serious things were here, she didn't feel safe to just wander around on her own. Not to mention the fact that she knew much of the population had a dislike for those people who found their life bonds, or whatever it was they called it. She knew enough about Janus's people to know that others would be able to tell she was someone's half as soon as she got near them.
Barker suddenly blinked back tears, Karton's name for what she and Janus were bringing his recent death to the forefront of her mind. It still hurt, a deep kind of pain that never went away, simply dulled over time. She knew Janus felt the same yet they hadn't truly spoken of Karton since they had left his station. Barker knew the worst thing would be for Janus to dwell on it, internally or otherwise; Janus had a habit of letting everything build up until she simply exploded. A pressure cooker. Barker herself had never been witness to such an explosion, but Patrik had told many stories, if only as a precaution.
A welcome knock on the door brought Barker out of her thoughts. She cracked the portal open to see Gregor outside, a welcoming smile on his face. "Hey."
"Hello. I thought you might like some company."
Barker opened the door fully and stepped into the hall. "Yes, please."
"How about a tour?"
"That sounds wonderful," she hooked her arm around his, ignoring his look of surprise, and started moving down the hall.
Gregor cleared his throat and started with the most obvious, "This building is called the Domicile. It's home to the ruling family, the family's aides and stewards, as well as guests. There are three floors closed completely to the public which serve as personal quarters and living areas. The first three floors house the room of Citizen Council, as well as various offices and meeting rooms. Also on those floors is the Dynastic Library, planetary records, and other various things too numerous to name.
"The walls have been inscribed with various symbols, most of which I'm sure you can read for yourself. Mostly they chronicle the changing leadership and are fairly boring. But they look impressive." Gregor grimaced, "Unfortunately, there hasn't been anyone here to be impressed in some time."
Barker nodded in acknowledgment, "Janus told me there were a lot of advocates in favor of isolationism."
Gregor waggled his hand, "A lot might be a bit of an overstatement. It's more a case of the minority being the most vocal. Nulas is hoping to change that, though. He's really committed to opening the planet up again, making it a center for trade and political relations." Off Barker's confused look Gregor clarified, "In Barlas's day we were a trading hub; the planet sits right off a main trading route that goes right through the Vu'bardi system."
"I thought ships weren't allowed to land on the planet?"
"They aren't, it's far too damaging to the energy currents. We found the effects to be too detrimental to ourselves and the planet. There used to be a station in orbit, ships would dock and the crews could take the direct line down. It worked well.
"Anyway, we were also... I guess mediators is the best way to put it."
"You?"
Gregor pursed his lips and stopped walking, "Could you sound any more incredulous?"
"Well..." Barker smiled and gestured for Gregor to continue.
"Yes, we were mediators. People knew we were powerful and had bad tempers. For the most part, everyone tried pretty hard not to anger us and when they did, diplomacy was always the first reaction. We gained a knack for negotiation and soon found ourselves resolving disputes between visiting diplomats."
"You were policing the system."
Gregor cocked his head in inquiry, "Po-lee-sing?"
"Uh," Barker blinked and reran her words through her head. They'd been conversing mostly in Gregor's mother tongue, Barker switching easily to English when she couldn't find the word she wanted. Policing didn't have an equivalent in his language and he obviously wasn't familiar with the English word. "Policing. You were sort of the authority, making sure everyone got along. You had the power so people deferred to you."
Gregor nodded and they resumed walking, "Yes, that is correct." He nodded until Barker started to giggle under her breath. "What?"
"I'm sorry Gregor, it's not you. I just can't imagine Janus mediating any argument."
"Hmph," he grunted in agreement, "I agree. Know that I was speaking in general terms, there are many of us who would much rather beat others into submission, simply out of a lack of ability to find a peaceful solution."
They continued down the hall, Gregor occasionally pointing something out as they walked.
***
"How do you get up there?" Barker craned her head back as far as it would go then tilted it to the side, attempting to get a view of the walls.
"We manage," Gregor said as he watched Barker contort herself.
They were standing at the bottom of a large circular tower that traveled the entire height of the Domicile and then some. Every inch of the walls were covered with frescos depicting their various past leaders. It was their tribute.
Barker finally turned her attention back to Gregor, "What do you do when the tower's full?"
"There are several of these attached to the Domicile and around the city. We build them as the need arises."
"Isn't there something better you could do with the space, though?"
Gregor tilted his head as he considered the question, "It is important to us to remember our leaders. The towers are built with great care and serve doubly as decoration and a historic monument." He gestured for them to leave the room.
They were halfway down the hall back to Barker's room when a steward rounded a corner ahead of them, "Gregor! You're needed in Chambers."
Gregor grabbed Barker's arm and pulled the woman with him as he started after the steward.
"What's going on?" Barker yelled as she skidded around a corner.
Gregor shook his head, "I don't know."
When they finally stopped running Barker realized that "Chambers" was Nulas's audience chambers. Nulas and Janus were against the far wall deep in discussion with grave expressions on their faces.
"What's going on?"
Nulas and Janus turned to Gregor and gestured at the window. He and Barker approached and peered outside to see the streets below congested with people. Congested with people who, it appeared, were trying to be a nuisance. Barker studied their faces, seeing mostly determined expressions.
Barker looked up at Janus, "What is this?"
Janus scowled, hooked her arm over Barker's shoulders and pulled the smaller woman away from the window. "A demonstration."
"Of?"
Nulas sighed and sat, "Of support for Taykio."
Barker looked between the trio, slightly confused, "Well, that's okay, isn't it? I mean, I know I haven't been here for very long but this doesn't seem like a dictatorship. People have the right to hold demonstrations, don't they?"
Nulas nodded quickly and waved his hand, "That is not the problem. They can demonstrate all they like. The problem is that they are filling main streets all over the city. Transportation has ground to a halt; people can not get into their homes or to market. It could very easily turn violent."
A wan smile appeared on Gregor's face as he scratched his chin, "At least we now have a better idea of how many people support Taykio."
Nulas glared at him then slouched in his chair, staring at the ceiling. "What do we do now?"
"Confrontin' them with force would not be a good idea, but the city needs ta function."
Gregor nodded his agreement, "Janus is right. If we do this wrong..." He trailed off and turned back to the window. "Let's just wait for now. They can not stay out there all day."
Nulas nibbled on his lip in thought then nodded, "But I want the military prepared to act. And get some of the stewards out in the crowds to get a sense of the atmosphere, but make sure they know they aren't to put themselves in any kind of danger."
Gregor nodded and started toward the door but paused as Nulas yelled a final instruction.
"And cancel my meetings for tomorrow!"
Gregor raised a hand in acknowledgment.
***
Huran tugged on the hem of his shirt and fiddled with his cuffs, gratified to see the same nervous gestures among the other stewards. He looked over at Pi'nan and smiled, hoping to calm some of the nervousness he could read in his friend's eyes.
Pi'nan blew out a breath and turned her attention to Gregor who stood at the front of the group reiterating the fact that they were only supposed to observe the crowds, get a sense of the people's attitudes.
Perhaps twenty stewards were gathered, all of them dressed in casual citizen clothes and not their official uniforms. They were to work in pairs, move through their assigned areas of the demonstration eavesdropping and return before sundown.
It wasn't that Pi'nan was angry at the assignment, quite the opposite. She was more than happy to perform this vital service for Nulas. She had never been a fan of Taykio's and knew the same was true for almost every person who worked in the Domicile. Pi'nan simply felt utterly out of her element.
"Time to go," Huran said in her ear.
"Remember what you said. We stay in view of each other."
"Absolutely." Huran nodded to confirm his words and squeezed Pi'nan's hand as they stepped out the back doors of the Domicile.
They couldn't simply walk into the city. They had to exit the Domicile, circle around through the woods, and then reenter the city opposite of the Domicile. It would take about a half hour before they would reach the city and then they'd only have three hours to mingle in the crowds if they were to return before sundown without breaking their cover.
Huran had to give Nulas and Gregor credit. It was something of an ingenious plan. No one ever noticed or remembered the service people. Furthermore, Nulas hadn't been in power long enough for general citizens to see the stewards very often.
He just hoped the plan worked as well in practice as it did in theory.
***
Barker watched Janus pace around their room, pause at the windowsill, then push off for another circuit around the bed. "You hate it, don't you?"
"What?"
"Not being able to go out there yourself, get your hands dirty, and start fixing this."
Janus grumbled something under her breath and leaned on the windowsill.
Barker smiled and laid back on the bed, "You're not a sideliner. You like to be in the thick of things."
"Barker..."
"Tell me I'm right. I know I am."
"Aye, now git over here."
Barker heard something in Janus's voice and joined her at the window. "What?"
"Look. There."
"I don't..." She strained her eyes, tilted her head, and then finally squirmed in front of Janus. "Now show me."
Janus ducked down so their eyes were on a level and pointed. "See?"
It was a long minute of searching an unfamiliar skyline, trying to pick out what was natural and what didn't belong. Finally, a small column of smoke drifting lazily into the air caught her attention. "That smoke? That's what you're looking at?"
"Aye."
Barker craned her head and looked behind her, "Have you gone nuts or something? It's just smoke. There isn't anything sinister about smoke."
"No. But there are not any 'ouses out there."
Barker shrugged, "So someone's camping." When she turned and saw the strange look gracing Janus's face Barker knew that camping wasn't something done here. "You know, you go out into the wild with a tent. Live with nature for awhile."
Janus started shaking her head slowly, "We do not...camp."
"You sure?"
"Aye." She gestured back to the smoke. "That is too close ta the mountains. Not a good area ta be sleepin' on the ground."
"So you think someone's out there doing something they shouldn't be doing? Or hiding?"
Janus nodded.
Barker nibbled on her lip as she thought. "And what are we going to do about this?" When she turned and looked up at Janus's face, a wicked grin was her answer.
"We are goin' campin'."
***
Huran raised his eyes above the heads of a group of demonstrators and locked onto Pi'nan's gaze. She was against the furthest line of buildings and gave him a questioning look. Huran flicked his eyes at the group and canted his head to the side, knowing Pi'nan would interpret that as 'these people have something you need to hear'.
Pi'nan nodded slightly and started to plan her route, flitting expertly between the crush of bodies to arrive within earshot of Huran's marks. She occupied herself with a merchant's pastry cart, one of the few thriving businesses on the street.
"So it was a success?"
"Yes."
"You're sure? We've had this news before."
Pi'nan tried to drift closer and get a look at their faces. That first voice had sounded so familiar.
"Absolutely."
Pi'nan turned and glanced out of the corner of her eye, straining her vision to glimpse their faces.
The first man nodded and turned to step closer to his companion, giving Pi'nan a clear view of his features. She only just withheld her gasp and turned sharply to keep him from seeing her face. She looked up and found Huran standing on the opposite side of the street, his expression revealing his concern and confusion at her behavior. She could only shake her head and wave him off, seeing clearly his desire to approach.
Resolutely, Pi'nan returned her attention to the conversation behind her, ignoring her instinct to run away. Not only would she miss out on this information, she'd very likely reveal herself.
Vinack looked up at the woman in front of him who turned swiftly to present him with her back. He saw the tension in her shoulders and thought she looked a little familiar...
"Vinack? Did you hear what I said?"
Vinack nodded, "Yes, yes. You're absolutely sure it really worked this time."
His companion scowled, "And you're wanted back."
Vinack mentally dismissed the woman and returned his full attention to the man beside him. "We are prepared to move forward, then?"
"Yes."
"Excellent." Vinack wrapped an arm around the other man's shoulders and started pushing his way through the crowd, not noticing the woman who eventually followed.
Huran watched as the men started moving away then cursed under his breath as Pi'nan started to follow. He stood, indecisive, considering the progress of the sun and then followed Pi'nan before she disappeared from his sight. It would be far worse to abandon a friend than to suffer Gregor's anger for disobeying his orders.
***
"Janus!" Nulas followed his sister as she continued to ignore him. "Janus, would you listen to me?"
Janus stopped inside a storage room and stared at the materials inside for a long moment. Still ignoring Nulas, she started to fill the bag slung over one shoulder.
"You are being unreasonable." Nulas said as he reached out for Janus's arm. "I need you here."
Janus finally straightened as she stuffed a final item in her bag. "No," she said.
"No?"
"Ya do not. Ya 'ave Gregor to 'elp make decisions. I 'ave added all I can. I am not a diplomat."
"That is not true. You can still help."
Janus gave him a sardonic look before she shook off his arm and walked over to a tall shelf, staring speculatively at its contents. "I kin 'elp ya now by findin' out what is goin' on."
"By going out into the woods? What did you call it? Komping?"
"Campin'."
Nulas nodded, "Do you realize how ridiculous this sounds? And stupid? We know there are people out there with something that can kill us and what do you decide to do? Go find them!"
Janus fingered the strap of her bag until she made her decision and reached out for an item off the shelf. She stared at it for a long while, deciding it would be smart to take it along, and then tucked it into the bottom of the bag.
"I swear, sometimes I do not know if you were born without common sense or if you lost it all in that-" Nulas cut himself off abruptly, hearing the harshness in his voice and realizing what he was about to say. It was too late, though. Janus really had been listening the whole time and knew how that sentence would have ended. He could tell in the sudden, absolute stiffness of her back which was now ramrod straight and the stark muscles of her clenched jaw.
When Janus finally turned to exit the storage room he could see the quiet simmering anger in her eyes and the pain his unvoiced comment had caused. She didn't look at him, or acknowledge him in any way, and Nulas knew then how much his motor mouth had cost him. He watched her head down the hall, her knuckles white around the strap of the bag, and felt like crawling under a rock. He slid down the wall to sit on the floor and shook his head in disbelief at himself.
"Idiot." He muttered to himself, "Stupid, stupid, idiot!"
