I don't like slash. At all. In any way, shape, or form. I will admit to having read some of the "cleaner" stuff (aka PG-13) so as to not be considered someone who hates something without knowing what it is, but I DO NOT like it!
Hobbit slash especially just makes me mad. Now, all you people who might get offended by this next part, keep in mind that I'm not saying Homosexuality is/was impossible in Middle-Earth. However, having Hobbits (or any resident of Arda, for that matter) in a homosexual relationship just doesn't work for me. This world, while very very real, was still created by one man. That man, incidentally, was a Catholic born in the early 20th century, indicating that unless he was VERY untraditional, he would have disapproved of homosexuality. And somehow, that equates itself (in my crazy head) to there being no homosexuals in Middle-Earth. Ergo, slash is uncanonnonical. (wow, there's alot of "O"s and "N"s in that word)
Sam/Frodo - to quote Tig: "Sam/Frodo is not just unlikely due to Sam's clear love for Rosie Cotton, but it cheapens one of the most touching friendships in fantasy--hey, in fiction--history." I really can't say anything more than that.
Merry/Pippin - Well, Hika is a genius, and I'm going to quote Merry and Pippin (through her) on this one. ^_^ (and Auntie Hika, pardon me if it isn't exactly right...I can't pull up the chapter right now)
"Merry: o.O But...we're cousins!
Pippin: Yep, cousins. Totally cousins. Definitely cousins. In conclusion: Cousins."
So, they're cousins. Hello, people, can we say "incest"????
I have only encountered ONE fic that even slightly resembles slash that I have liked: One and Only, by Baylor. It was a tasteful dealing of homosexuality in the form of Frodo and a distant cousin many times removed (Reggie). Sort of as an explanation of why he never married, although I think he was just too much like Bilbo - an eternal bachelor. But the situation was written subtly and tastefully enough (from the end of a young Merry Brandybuck) that I was able to actually enjoy it.
Now, joking about slash is a whole other matter - in Cardboardia slash is encouraged, and I think San has slashed almost everyone with fellow Cardboardians! (I, for example, was recently slashed with Hika...Rosie/Hika, can you imagine?) Aragorn/Sam was a pairing that brought laughs through many episodes of The Pencil Show, and I find it hilarious - mostly because it was a JOKE! I can enjoy jokes.
As a final note, I'd like to say that I am not condemning slash writers or homosexuals - I don't like the stories and I don't approve of the lifestyle, but that doesn't mean you're bad people or bad writers! So please do not take offense.
Sincerely,
Rosie Peregrine Took
P.S. "I am a duck with big fluffy feathers, and I like to hop into the pool whilst donning a polkadotted innertube" ~Tig. O.o
