Have you ever looked at someone and thought to yourself, “Man! That guy was NUTS!!! I mean, totally insane!”? If you have, then they may or may not be eligible for the Captain Psycho Awards!!!

The Captain Psycho Awards is a prestigious award given to those who have shown extreme talent in the field of all-around general psychoticness! This award is given by Captain Psycho, himself (meaning the dude pretending to be Captain Psycho, me). Pretty much anyone who Captain Psycho knows about is eligible for this award, but will only win it if he/she/it has proven themselves worthy of being known as the world’s craziest psycho (or at least worthy of a life sentence to the world’s most secure asylum) (Either that or it is rigged). This includes real people, book and movie characters, and figments of your imagination! Take a look at this year’s (before Summer of 2005) honorary Captain Psycho Award winners. Remember, they all are winners of the Honorary Captain Psycho Award (which is just as good), but there can only be one true winner of the CAPTAIN PSYCHO AWARDS!!!

	Opal Koboi (Artemis Fowl: The Opal Deception) for “Creating a Brilliant, Yet Psychotic, Revenge Scheme, Carrying it Out (Killing a Few Main Characters), and Causing General Chaos Throughout the Planet!!! (While All the While Having Fun and, Like the Evil Genius She Is, Being One Step Ahead of Her Opponents!!!)”
	Damien Cray (Eagle Strike) for “Being a Psychotic Rich Environmentalist Who Hijacked Air Force One in a Brilliant Elaborate Scheme Involving Scaring the Bejeebers Out of Air Traffic Control and Then Hi-jacking The Nukes Which He Launched at 25 Locations All to Rid the World of Drugs!!!!!! (That, and Burying an Innocent Man Alive in Nickels And Commenting That it ‘Was Fun’!!!)”
	Nemesis (The AI Computer Virus) (Spy High Mission Two: Chaos Rising) for “Being an Ultra-Cool Computer Virus That Killed Everyone in an Office Building, Crashed Airplanes, Crashed Airborn Cities, Destroyed an Agricultural Dome, Nearly Killed a Whole Bunch of the Main Characters, Made a Little Girl Think The Sky Was Falling, Resurrecting a Bunch of Dead Researchers… The List Goes On! Read The Book!”
	SCORPIA (Sabotage, Corruption, Intelligence, Assassinations) (Scorpia) for “Killing A lot of People (Including the Entire British Soccer Team, And Only The British Soccer Team, At The Same Time Without Any Apparent Assassins in the Area As A Demonstration That They Could Do So), and Trying to Destroy the Relationship Between The US and UK by Making Rediculous Demands That The US Follow or the UK Would be Punished and Then Trying to Kill Thousands of Children By Contaminating the Vaccinations With Radio-Controlled Poison Capsules That Would Be Activated at a Certain Time.”
	Vaati (Zelda: The Minish Cap) for “Disrupting Palace Events In a Huge Display of Power That Had Really Cool Music And Then Turning Zelda To Stone, Then Taking Control of the King and Later, Turning Him To Stone and Transforming Hyrule Castle into an Evil Place. He Has A Hat That Grants His Every Wish (Wouldn’t You Go Psycho If You Had a Cap That Granted Your Every Wish?)”
	The Phantom of the Opera (Phantom of the Opera) for “Killing Lots of People In Full Public View and Scaring the Heck Out of the Ballet Dancers and Killing Everyone Who Got Between Christine and Him, Creating a “Great Disaster” That Involved Flames, Death, and a Falling Chandelier, and Proving that No One Gets Between a Psycho and His Girl, While All The While Singing in Hypnotic and Catchy Tune!”
	The Happy Mask Salesman (Zelda: Majora’s Mask) for “Having SERIOUS Personality Issues. I Mean, One Second He is Happy and Smiling, While the Next, He is Shaking You By Your Neck With an Evil Angry Face Threatening To Kill You and, The Next Second, Acts Like It is No Big Deal.”
	Sam (AKA “The Happy Police”) (Club Dread) FOR “Slowly Killing Off the Employees of a Tropical Resort One by One for ‘Not Doing Their Jobs,’ Trapping Them On The Island, And Telling Them, On The Activities Board, That They Were Not To Tell The Guests or They Would Die, Then Telling the Guests Anyways! All in Accordance With an Acid-Trip Song Called Naughty Cal By Coconut Pete!!!”
	Dr. Bad (Some Book That Had Not Been Published Yet) for “Destroying Everything in the Universe in Randomly Psychotic Ways, Destroying Squirrel City With A Giant Mallet, Destroying Chicago by Bringing All The Trees in the Forest to Life and Commanding Them to Grab Axes and Chop Down The Humans for Furniture and Fuel for Their Fires, Destroying the Earth by Crashing the Moon into it, and Destroying the Solar System by Capturing the Sun in a Jar to Use as His Nightlight, All in a Giant Game of Tag.”
	Sepiroth (Final Fantasy VII) for “Doing a Whole Bunch of Crazy Stunts Including Destroying the Main Character’s Home Town in A Fiery Inferno, Messing With Everyone’s Minds, Being Annoying and Teleporting Around Every Tow Seconds, Creating an Illusion of Swirling Greenness and Beating Everyone Up and Then Tricking the Guy With the Black Materia to Bring it to the Main Character Who He Made Go Crazy and Give Him the Black Materia, Freeing the Weapons, Dying But Leaving His Psychotic Essence Behind So He Could Resurrect Himself, and Summoning a Giant Regenerating Meteor To Slam Into the Planet, Thus Destroying All Life as We Know It!!!!! ALL BECAUSE HE FOUND OUT WHO HIS MOM WAS!!!!!! (P.S. His Boss Music Was Cool Too!)”

VOTE TODAY!!
To vote send an e-mail to Captain Psycho today! Use "Captain Psycho Awards Voting" as your subject (it should already be there, but if not, make it)and please list the candidates in order, from one to ten, with one being the most psychotic and ten being the least psychotic!

This site may be about psychos. But not about psychos who kidnap children.