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' 3 C O U N T ... 1 ... 2 ... 3 ! '
RP#1: T H E A R R I V A L
Just days after the hugely impressive return of the IWA with Raw, and the staff are packing up and cleaning the arena. Most of the IWA superstars have left to do their own thing, and 3 Count look to be following suit as we see them leaving the arena. As they try to do so though, IWA owner Ric Flair steps out in front of them. Helms and Moore exchange looks with each other, and try to step around Flair but he doesn't allow them.
'Nature Boy' Ric Flair
Woah woah, where do you two think you're going guys?
Helms and Moore smile, reach into their back pockets and each pull out what seem to be concert tickets.
'Nature Boy' Ric Flair
And what are those?
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Justin Timberlake...iiiiin concert! And we have wrangled ourselves front row tickets!
'Nature Boy' Ric Flair
Ok...so let me get this straight. You're leaving here without doing anything at all for us...to go see a pop concert. After all I did for you, signing you to the IWA.
'Sweet' Shannon Moore
Well Ric...Mr Flair, sorry. We did do an interview on Raw. It's just...Coach was such an idiot we had to cut it short. And it's not any pop concert. It's Justin Timberlake. Front row. When the big JT comes calling, you've got to accept the charges.
'Nature Boy' Ric Flair
Listen guys...I don't care if it's a Justin Timberlake concert, an Elvis concert or a Burt Bacharach concert! I have given you a shot at the IWA's Tag Team Championships on your first night in, and I think that constitutes a bit of generosity. So...I think you owe me a little in return. And I also...think that you guys will bring in a different type of audience. Yeah...I've just had a great idea...listen, guys. I may have been a little hard on you just then. You are after all a great tag team unit. So you can go to this concert with...Jamie...Justin...whoever. But...take a camera man with you. This could bring in some new fans. You could be the new Hardy Boyz. Good job, keep it up!
Flair lets out a 'WHOO!' as he walks off, leaving 3 Count stood with their bags by the exit. Shane starts to look around for a camera man, as Shannon taps him on the shoulder.
'Sweet' Shannon Moore
Shane...who's Burt Bacharach?
'Sugar' Shane Helms
I don't know, but what's all that about? New Hardy Boyz? We are so much better than the Hardlyz. I mean come on. The Hardyz? Fahgetaboutit!
'Sweet' Shannon Moore
Forgot about it!
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Good. Hey listen...before we go anywhere. I got a question. F.B.I right. We're facing them on Raw...but something's been bugging me. Have...Italians even heard of Justin Timberlake?
'Sweet' Shannon Moore
Well...I guess. He is an international phenomenon. But then again, I've never seen any Italians at a Justin Timberlake concert before.
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Me neither. Damn...if they have no Justin Timberlake...what the hell do they listen to?
'Sweet' Shannon Moore
Mmm...Pavarotti I guess.
'Sugar' Shane Helms
No wonder they formed the Mafia. I'd want to kill someone if I had to listen to Pavarotti day and night.
Helms and Moore nod in mutual agreement, as suddenly Michael Cole walks past them. Helms and Moore exchange a look as we see a camera man following Michael. Soon 3 Count are running after Cole, and stop him in his tracks.
'Shoelace' Michael Cole
Guys...hey. Where's the fire?
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Listen. We need to borrow your camera man...
'Shoelace' Michael Cole
No way...
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Aw come on. We'll look after him. Look, Flair told us we need to take him to a Justin Timberlake concert.
'Shoelace' Michael Cole
Really? Doesn't seem like something he'd say. But it's still no. I need a camera man so I can do my job. As interviewer.
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Firstly...everyone's left already. And secondly...please
'Sweet' Shannon Moore
Hey...why don't you come with us?
'Shoelace' Michael Cole
Really? You've got a spare ticket?
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Well no...but that's the beauty of the black market. Bring your wallet and we'll get in for sure.
'Shoelace' Michael Cole
Well ok. Seeing as you offered. I don't really like Justin Timberlake. I'm 'Shoelace' see. But sure. So...this is how you're preparing for your IWA debut Tag Team Championship match. A pop concert?
'Sugar' Shane Helms
It's not just a pop concert. It's Justin Timberlake, front row. And anyways, what are the F.B.I doing? Washing cars. Their wrestling careers are so pathetic, they have to wash cars just to pay the bills. What does that say? And anyway, it's only the F.B.I. It could have been worse...we could have been up against the Brooklyn Brawler and Funaki.
'Sweet' Shannon Moore
That would have been bad.
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Exactly. F.B.I? Fahgetaboutit!
'Sweet' Shannon Moore
Forget about it.
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Good. They deserve to be forgotten about. They suck. Did they ever hold the WCW Hardcore Title? 3 Count did.
'Shoelace' Michael Cole
I believe Stamboli did. And the WCW Tag Titles. Nunzio was ECW Tag Champ if I remember correctly...
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Ok, we get the point. But does that matter? No, it don't matter at all Michael. See we're a team. Me and Shannon...we're tight. Tighter than Beyonce's butt cheeks? Doubtful. But we're still pretty tight. Stamboli and Nunzio aren't as tight as us. In fact, they're as far apart as Christina Aguilera's legs...if you know what I'm saying!
'Sweet' Shannon Moore
Yeah, I'm feelin' what you're feelin'. 3 Count...together as one. Cause we work hard, and then we play hard.
Cole starts sniggering under his breath, as 3 Count stop and stare at him.
'Shoelace' Michael Cole
Sorry...sorry guys...
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Yeah, as we were saying. The F.B.I may have done well in tag team wrestling in the past...but that was with other partners. Me and Shannon are a team. We work together as a cohesive unit. And we have done for a long time. It doesn't matter that they're both former Tag Champs, in different companies. It doesn't matter that Stramboli is strong, and Nunzio...isn't. Hell, it don't matter at all. Regardless of age, size, height or musical taste...
EVERBODY GOES DOWN...FOR DA 3 COUNT!
'Sweet' Shannon Moore
And that means...everybody. Now are we going to this concert or what?
'Shoelace' Michael Cole
Ok, but you've got to give me an interview when we get there, otherwise Flair's gonna go nuts. Again.
'Sugar' Shane Helms
Relax Michael...
'Sweet' Shannon Moore
You'll live longer! Besides, what's the worst that could happen. It's a Justin Timberlake concert, not a Mafia get together. Just relax and enjoy...
Helms and Moore walk off, as Shoelac...I mean Cole follows, the cameramna in tow. The first time a Justin Timberlake concert has been used for a wrestling interview...probably. How heavy is that?
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