(voice over) although shakespear is now accepted as the greatest writer in english history he was often shunned by people, though no one knows why.

group: yo ho ho and a bottle of rum, watch out for guy’s who stick it up yer bum!

the crowd of drinkers laugh heartily at their wonderful ditty.
the door to the tavern opens and in walks a garishly dressed effeminate man.
he has a sheaf of parchment under his arms.
the group of drinkers all fall silent and look towards the effeminate man and start to mumble amongst themselves.

group member #1: watch out lads, there's a queer about.

group member#2 backs to the wall lads.

the effeminate man tosses his head back and lifts his nose into the air to symbolise disdain.
he walks (like a big sissy) across to an empty table, dusts the chair using a frilly handkerchief and sits.
he places the parchment onto the table and produces a large pink fur covered box from within his cloak.
he opens the box to reveal a quill made from a peacock’s tail feather.
he stoops over the parchment and starts to write.

a rough looking man from the group of drinkers walks to the table.
he sees the quill and parchment.

rough looking guy: (to all in the tavern) ohh, look ‘e’s a writer, everyone look at the sissy writer. ‘e comes in ‘ere wearing a woman’s blouse wif ‘is big poofy feather and starts writing. where you from nancy boy?

effeminate man: (in gay voice): i doth hail from Stratford good sir.

rough guy: (aping the effeminate man) he doth hail from Stratford!
he slams his fist onto the table making the effeminate man jump visibly and make a squeaking noise of fright.
rough guy: only poof’s and queers come from Stratford, which one are you then nancy boy?

Effeminate man: stop being fresh with me (he flicks the feather at the rough guy’s nose and blows him a kiss) gimme a kiss big boy.

we see from the effeminate mans view a large ham like fist approaching at high speed.

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