Clerk of court: all rise.

A judge walks in and sits down.

Clerk of court: judge Hampton-Smyth presiding.

Judge: yes yes, we all know that, lets get on with it i want to be on the golf course by midday.

The clerk of the court stands: the court is now in session, judge Hampton-Smyth presiding. the court will now hear the defence.

A lawyer stands, he is wearing the usual lawyer robes but has a Rasta hat on and his wig is a set of dreadlocks: ladies and gentlemen (in a heavy Jamaican patois) I and I will today prove to you dat de dude in de dock today is innocent as sure as Haile Selassie is the one true god. JAH! RASTAFARI!
de man in de dock was stopped in de street for smokin de ‘erb. I and I ask you is dat a crime?

Judge: actually it is.

the lawyer looks shocked.
Lawyer: if you honour would excuse me, I and I have to go and weed my garden.

the lawyer runs out of the court.

Back to Comedy Sketches

Back to Front page