“Johnny,” yelled the pram pushing mother, as I walked past the local park “get yer fuckin arse aff that bastardin’ swing and fuckin come ‘ere”.
I shook my head, lowered my cap over my eyes and reached into my pocket for a cigarette.
“Johnny ya wee cunt! Am I talkin tae maself? If ah huv tae come and get ye I'll kick yer fuckin arsehole aw the way hame!” She bellowed “dinnae make us come ower there and git ye”.
“For the love of god” I thought to myself as I pulled my Zippo from my jeans and lit my cancer stick.
I wandered home wondering to myself what kind of a man that poor kid was going to be when he grew up.
Probably just another Ned who’ll scrounge off the social for the rest of his days. He’ll more than likely have a common law wife with blotchy legs, white stilettos and no social graces whatsoever.
Just like his mother.
His children will be the perfect advert for abortion. It’s an unfair world...
In a perfect world we would have a system that roots out the dregs of society like him and his whole creed, lines them up against a wall and shoots them.
Lets face it, they use up our oxygen, have no social conscience, have no desire to better themselves or the human race and generally set a bad example to everyone that has the misfortune to cross their path.
if you are honest you’ll agree with wiping out these soporific retards and their ilk. if you think not then you are lying to yourself and that's worse than lying to me by denying it.
but who would we get to judge who lives and who dies? any suggestions? is there anyone who the country trusts to make this kind of decision? our elected leaders? fuck no. they were voted for by less people than voted for the winner of last years brain-drain reality TV show big brother.
our religious leaders? god no. they all live under the delusion that god is a Christian and can’t even agree on whether he’s a protestant or a catholic...
(just for the record i’d like to clear that argument up right here and now. God is the voice of reason that resides in our own heads. he has no affiliation with any church.)
so who does that leave? our royal family? i really hope that they don’t get the job of weeding out the dregs of society or within a year the only people that will be living are those chinless, soulless, ball less shitheels that populate the ridiculously lavish homes of our country. well obviously they’d keep some lesser mortals just so that they don’t have to pull on their own trousers in the morning.
and while we’re on the subject of oxygen wasting halfwits maybe we should also wipe royalty from our earth.
i mean come on folks, what the fuck is it with our royal family? they’re all utterly insane.
we have Queen Liz, a haggard old trout who does nothing all day. it’s all sign letters for people who have lived to be 100, (that’s always seemed a bit silly to me. getting a letter from the queen just because you managed not to die.) open the occasional swimming pool or school and wave to people occasionally. then we have Prince Phillip. you know him, he’s the daft as a bag of monkey’s Greek/German moron that can’t keep his foot out his mouth when it comes to international relations.
then there’s our future King Chuck (or is he? if his mother doesn’t pop her clogs and buy the farm soon he may miss out on the coronation thing due to his own departure) who recently warned the country that if nanobot’s are ever developed they could turn our world into a grey goo.
not only that but he married a woman purely to shit out good looking children and then had her killed. he then chose to get together with someone who has the looks of a butchers dog. i think it’s a genetic disorder. stupidity runs in their family.
maybe i should be the arbitrator of who lives and who dies. after all i am the most rational person on this planet. or so i think anyway. feel free to disagree with that statement if you want but remember that i may just add your name to my list...

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