there is a steady rain and a slight mist.
we move over some gravestones with various names on them to see a gathering of people.
we approach and see various mourners standing wide eyed in amazement.
we move round the faces to see that there is one person dressed as a clown.

scene2. in a modern suburban house.

there is a table with sandwiches laid out on it. mourners and well wishers stand chatting amongst themselves.

from behind the table of sandwiches the clown appears coming up a set of non existent steps.

the clown takes a cocktail sausage and inserts it in his left nostril. he puts another up his right nostril.
he makes a ridiculous face and starts to do a funny walk around the room squawking like a chicken.

he then takes two finger sandwiches from a plate full of them and jams them into his ears.

he produces a modelling balloon from a pocket and blows it up, he takes another and blows that one up also.
he puts his hands behind his back and we see his arms moving.
he produces a cock and balls shaped balloon animal and proceeds to wave it at the gathered mourners.

he squirts water from his buttonhole at the mourners.

he shakes hands with people, they are buzzed by a hand held buzzer.

he makes fart noises and waves his hand to indicate a terrible smell.

he walks to the table filled with food and lifts a plate of boiled eggs in sauce and pours it all down the front of a mourners trousers.
he then shoves a cake into the face of another of the mourners.

we cut to an old lady who is standing with a young man.

young man:would you like me to say something to him mum?
old lady: no dear. he was your fathers boss for thirty years.

young man: but why is he dressed as a clown? dad was a plumber.

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