Weeeeeelllll, I bet you're wondering, "Who is crazy enough to actually try one of everything Taco Bell has?" ME, CRAZY GORDITA OF COURSE!

WHY have I gone through the trouble to make this weird and wacky site? CUZ TACO BELL RULES! Not only are almost all of the things they make extremely delicious, if you compare the nutrition facts of Taco Bell's items to another fast food place's, you'll find that Taco Bell's foods are a lot less fattening and have a lot less cholesterol! Not to mention almost all of Taco Bell's food items have all the four food groups! Also, Taco Bell's foods are not greasy or that heavy, not even the Chalupas which look like they should be greasy and/or heavy! Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that Taco Bell is exactly health food, I mean it's still a fast food place, but it is arguably the fast food place that is the least bad for you!

Lemme give you a very valuable Taco Bell tip:

There are two types of Taco Bells. Some are actually controlled by Yum! Brands, Inc. (Thanks for the name change info, Julie!). Yum! (formerly known as Tricon Global Foods) owns a total of five food chains, which are A&W, Kentucky Fried Chicken, Long John Silver's, Pizza Hut and last but certainly not least Taco Bell. Taco Bells directly owned and operated BY Yum! are the Taco Bells you should eat at. They have no qualms about customizing your order, plus the workers are much nicer. Other Taco Bells are franchise owned. The quality of their food varies (and is unfortunately usually bad), so eat at one with caution. Here's an example of a bad franchise Taco Bell: This one near me doesn't let you put chicken or steak in hard tacos, if you get a value meal you can't get chicken in the side taco and they frequently run out of ingredients like retards so they can't serve all of the Taco Bell food items correctly. One time they didn't have Pepperjack Sauce and one time they didn't have CHICKEN! The last straw is the fact that almost none of the workers at franchise Taco Bells seem to know how to make the food!! The reason I have such a comprehensive menu is because I eat at Yum! Taco Bells. You should too (unless all you have near you is a franchise one). You'll be much more satisfied. How can you tell corporate and franchise Taco Bells apart, you ask? Well, one sure fire way to tell if a Taco Bell is a corporate one is if the building serves more than one type of fast food. Yum! has been doing the "put many fast food choices in one building" strategy for a long time now. For instance, back when I was in college there was a Yum! place near campus that had Taco Bell, KFC and Pizza Hut available at once (lovingly known as the "KenTacoHut").

And now, the FAQ. If there is a question you have that isn't here, go ahead and send it to me, but please read this FAQ carefully before emailing me to make sure your question hasn't already been answered.

Q: Can you please put up the prices of all the Taco Bell food items?
A: Prices vary everywhere; even two Taco Bells in the same state can have drastically different prices. I would if I could, but I unfortunately can't. :(
Q: My Taco Bell doesn't have some of the items on your menu/has some items that you have denoted as discontinued on your menu. What's going on?
A: Different Taco Bells serve different things. I guess it depends on what items are popular in a certain area. It's very hard to keep tabs on what's discontinued and what's not, but I do the best I can. If there is an error in the menu, by all means let me know!
Q: I would like to get a job at Taco Bell. Can you help me out?
A: Your best bet is to just walk into your local Taco Bell and ask for an application form. You could also go to Taco Bell's website, click on "Our Company," then either click on "Cool Jobs" or "Corporate and Field Opportunities."
Q: People keep telling me that the ingredients they use at Taco Bell (especially the meat) are of a very low quality. What do you say to this?
A: I don't understand why people think this. I've never gotten sick from eating at Taco Bell. If someone had a bad experience there, it's probably because the people working at the Taco Bell they ate at didn't prepare the food properly.
Q: Whyyyyy doooooo yooooou sometiiiiimes speeeeak liiiiike thiiiiis!?!?!?
A: Okay a lot of people have been wondering this...I'm NOT trying to sound mexican!! lol. I'm taking a page from the Simpsons. Come on, you know what I'm talking about! Homer Simpson? "Mmmmmm baaaaacon...." :P
Q: Can you give me recipes of the foods Taco Bell makes?
A: Even if I had them, I couldn't. Taco Bell's recipes are their intellectual property; it would be illegal to distribute their secrets. However, if you do a little websearching, I'm sure you can find recipes that are similar to some of the things Taco Bell makes.
Q: Hey! I sent you information/sent in a review/signed the guestbook, but you haven't added the info/review/signature to your site yet! What gives?
A: If you sent me info, I usually wait until I get email from more than one person stating the same thing so I know the info is legit. If the info you sent in isn't on the site yet, then you're the first to tell me the info and I'm waiting for a second source. Reviews are added to the site when I have time to put them there (I do have a life, after all :P). As for the guestbook, a lot of mean spirited people left many vulgar things in it and because I want everyone young and old to be able to view my site without having to worry about seeing things like that, I screen all entries before adding them to the guestbook. Be patient; if you sent in a signature and didn't put potty mouth type things in it, it'll be up there eventually. :)
Q: Can you please bring back the (insert my favorite discontinued food here)?
A: I don't work for Taco Bell and this isn't the official Taco Bell website. Go to their website if you want to send in your request.
Q: What happened to the polls?
A: HTMLGear makes you pay to have polls on your site now. :\
Q: How come you took down your site for a few months?
A: Okay...I'm going to make this as short and to the point as possible. Close to the end of 2004 my site got linked from FARK(as they say there, my site got FARKED, hehe). A lot of people started talking about my site, and some of them said that my site was helping promote slavery because of how certain tomato pickers that work for companies where Taco Bell purchases tomatoes get treated. I had known about the boycott prior to this and I thought that attacking Taco Bell was silly because they should attack the actual produce company directly. I did a little research and thought that Taco Bell was negligent by not helping out because they are after all a large, powerful company, not to mention the largest customer of that company. So I started supporting the boycott by taking down my site and putting a farewell message in its place. About a month later, someone emails me telling me that its pointless to boycott Taco Bell because it's not just THOSE tomato pickers that get very little money, it's the entire industry that pays produce pickers low wages. I did some more research and found that to be true. At that point I was so fed up with everything that I laid low for a while. Well anyway, now the Taco Bell boycott is over so it's all water under the bridge anyways. It's great to be back. :)
Q: Where can I get nutrition facts on Taco Bell's foods?
A: At www.tacobell.com!
Q: Can I buy some of the ingredients that Taco Bell uses to make their foods?
A: Yes and no. Recently a Taco Bell fan told me that they actually have Taco Bell refried beans available in grocery stores now, so I gave it a try. They're pretty similar to the beans you actually get from Taco Bell, except for one thing. There's this extra sweet tinge to the beans...which seems to be because they added extra onion flavor. The beans were good, but I could've done without the extra sweetness. Ah well, I guess nothing beats going to an actual Taco Bell! Still, they tasted quite good. If you can't get to a TB and need a quick fix, this isn't a bad option at all!
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Questions? Comments? Wanna be a TB Critic? Wanna discuss reoccuring dreamsof being tied up in shrink wrap while being sacrificed to a 60 foot tall spiderwith no fashion sense? MY NEW EMAIL ADDRESS IS SAIKYOKI AT GMAIL DOT COM.

This page is mine and stuff, so please don't rip it off. That is all.