IF YOU SMELL WHAT THE ROCK IS COOKING
*The crowd grows silent when suddenly the lights go dim, and the titantron lights up showing The Coach standing in the interview area with a microphone.*
Coach: Hello everyone, we are expecting the arrival of EWA superstar The Rock anytime now. Actually here he is right now.
*The Rock walks up next to coach.*
Coach: Rocky....
*The Rock puts a hand in front the Coach's face.*
The Rock: The millions are chanting his name.
Crowd: ROCKY ROCKY ROCKY!
The Rock: Now coach, what is it you have to say to the Rock.
Coach: I just wanted to get your thoughts on the EWA's first ever main event match on the debut of EWA Mayhem. You are headlining the event with Stone Cold Steve Austin.
The Rock: Stone Cold? Stone Cold? Well the Rock says this Stone Cold Steve Austin, he challenges The Rock? He wants to stop The Rock from being able to go one on one with the supposed excellence of execution Bret Hart? So Stone Cold wants to go one on one with the Great One! Steve Austin, hear this, you want to fight the Rock, you want to make your monkey @$$ famous? Why don't you sit in the back and drink a beer. WHAT?! Then drink another beer. WHAT?! Down one more steveweiser. Now Stone Cold look down at the ground. Count those beer cans, one... WHAT?! Don't ask yourself questions just keep counting. two.... WHAT?! Stop confusing yourself with whats. Now count the last one, that's right three, three empty beer cans. Now The Rock wants you to take all of those beer cans, take a paper towel and wipe them off until they are nice and shiny. Now lube them up really good, no nevermind, forget the lube, the lube is too good for you. Just take those three shiny beer cans, turn those som b!tches sideways and stick them STRAIGHT UP YOUR CANDY @$$! You see Stone Cold, there a lot of differences between you and The Rock. The Rock, is not a drunk, incoherrant, obliterant, a redneck, and The Rock is in fact going to be the first ever EWA World Heavy Weight champion! Austin, you fit all of the categories above except the last one. That is the one title that will belong to The Rock, the first Champion. The people's champion! Jabroni, who in the blue hell do you think you are? Do you think that you are a champion level fighter? Do you think that because you drink a lot of beers the people should love you? No, hell no! The people including The Rock just think that you are the worlds absolute dumbest jack@$$! Austin, there is one thing that The Rock wants from you. Yes The Rock wants something from Stone Cold Steve Austin. It's something very important. The Rock wants you to quit your b!tching, stop whining, and be a man. Wait to do that first you would have to grow a set of testicles wouldn't you Austin. So go to the plastic surgeon, pay them all of your money, and let them insert a couple of rubber balls so that you can have what it takes to be a man. And oh yes The Rock knows about the night with you and the Donkey!
Coach: What?
The Rock: The Rock said he knows about that night with you Austin, and The donkey.
Coach: What are you talking about?
The Rock: Coach, live TV, now is not the time to go into detail. So Austin as The Rock was...
Coach: I have no idea what you are referring to.
The Rock: Coach, you, austin, Eddie the Donkey, Hee-Haw, Beer and microphone? Now let it go.
Coach: But Rock, this never happened, I mean what are you even talking about I have no idea.
The Rock: Listen Coach, I know about the night you and Austin got drunk you went out to see Eddie the donkey, Austin was trying to shove beer is the @$$ of the Jack@$$ while you were trying to put a microphone in there, and you got mule kicked right in the Coach's strudel. So moving on Austin when we go one....
Coach: But that was only one night and Austin wasn't there.
*The Rock gives coach a confused look.*
The Rock: WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA! The Rock was telling a joke. A funny funny, ha ha. Coach you get out of here you sick freak.
*The Rock takes the microphone away from the Coach, shoves him away, and stands there holding it.*
The Rock: Finally The Rock can get down to business with Stone Cold. The Rock will return this Saturday to Madison Square Garden. The most electrifying man in sports entertainment goes to one of the most electrifying sports arena's in the world. Stone Cold can you feel the electricity, can you feel the excitement? Can you feel my foot being shoved straight up your candy @$$? Austin this isn't a time to be playing little games, no that's not what The rock is here to do. I am here to take you Steve, and beat you from pillar to d@mn post and back again! The Rock knows the only reason you requested this match was so that The Rock will make your monkey @$$ famous. If that's what you want from The Rock then that is what you are going to get. The great one will make you famous by laying the smackdown harder then you ever imagined. You'll have to pop the tops off of those beers, drop your pants, and drink those beers through your @$$ by the time The Rock is done with you. There is no way on God's green earth that you could beat The Rock. You may have been able to beat joe jackson, you may have been able to beat gillberg, you may have even been able to find and beat your meat, but you have not, can not, and will not beat The Rock. So when you came out here flapping your gums, pretending to be a somebody, like anyone cared what you had to say, you demanded a fight, because you wanted a piece of the Brahma bull. You wanted a huge, large, big beefy bite of the bronco bustin', rough tough snortin', pie eatin' bull. The Rock will say this Austin you have guts, no brains, but guts and The Rock admires that. He admires that you actually want to come down to the ring and stand next to The People's Champion. The Rock is going to make sure that this becomes no easy ride for you Austin. You are going to reach down deep into the pit of your stomach right past the beer and pull out the Jack Daniel's in ya so you can keep yourself from looking stupid in front of the people. It won't matter how bionic you think you are, it doesn't matter how much three sixteen you study, and it doesn't matter the amount of beer you drink, one way or another you are going to hit Rock Bottom. Austin from here there are only two directions for you. Straight up and sideways. So take your beer cans stick them straight up your candy @$$, because for you there is no tomorrow. and that's the bottom line WHAT?! And That's The Bottom Line WHAT?! AND THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE 'CUZ STONE COLD SAID SO!
*The Rock walks off camera, but it doesn't fade it just stays tuned in. The Rock comes in from the left side of the screen stumbling like he's drunk. The Rock after walking off screen again comes walking back from the right side putting two middle fingers in the air then walking back off screen. The Rock comes in again from the left side pretending like the microphone is a beer can and he is drinking beer. The Rock then stops raises the microphone to his lips...*
The Rock: IF YA SMELLLALALALALAOW WHAT THE ROCK, IS COOKIN'!
*The Rock raises his eyebrow towards the camera, and drops the microphone as the screen fades.*
*The crowd was starting to get bored and quiet and the excitement in the arena started to drop.*
*The Rock comes out from behind the curtain wearing his usual wrestling tights, and black boots. The fans rise up out of their seats cheering, for The Rock. He stands at the top of the ramp and smells the air, before walking down the ramp. He makes his way to the metal steps where he walks up and then stands on the apron and steps through the ropes. He gives Liliane Garcia a glance then stands up on the second turnbuckle in the corner and throws his right hand in the air. He hops down and Lilian gladly hands him the microphone as she exits the ring. The music fades and The Rock stands in the center of the ring with the microphone.*
The Rock: FINALLY......THE ROCK......HAS COME BACK.....to Madison Square Gardens. The MSG, the place of the first ever EWA event. Filled all the way to the raftors with...the people! There's been a lot of questions going around lately, Rocky what will you do about Stone Cold, Rocky what are your plans for the world championship, Rocky why team up with The Undertaker, you don't need anyone. First things first, you are right The Rock doesn't need a partner, but what The Rock does know is that many of these superstars have ruthless aggression and they are out to pull every dirty trick in the book to win. If that means taking out The Rock. it will be attempted. So The Rock has decided to team up with The Undertaker to cover his back and for no other reason then that. The Rock's main goal right now is to go get that world championship, the title that belongs to The Rock, the championship that will belong to no other man than The Rock. The Rock has been working hard for a few years to get to where he is today. Never stopping, never looking back, only beating one jabroni after another and planting them to the ground reminding them that they will never be quite like The Rock. One of those jabroni's that hasn't quite learned his lesson yet is Stone Cold Steve Austin. He comes out here whining and crying. *Mocking Stone Cold.* I'm going to boo-hoo whoop-@$$. Rocky that stupid b@st@rd boo-hoo. what what what what what what? Stone Cold's ring, what Stone Cold's belt, boo-hoo love me I'm stone cold. *The Rock stops mocking him.* The Rock says this, Stone Cold you told the world you are going to whoop The Rock's @$$? You called the Rock a stupid b@st@rd? You said that the world championship already has your name on it? The Rock says know your role, and shut your d@mn mouth. Pull your head out of your own @$$ for a moment and get with it here Stone Cold. The Rock believes he heard you laugh at him, and talk about how The Rock just came out of hollywood. Are you jealous of The Rock? Are you upset because when people see you they think of the stunt double that screwed it up? You also mentioned that you smell what The Rock is cooking, and you think it stinks. Hell no you wouldn't like what The Rock is cooking, because it involves you lying on your back listening to the one two three from the referee. Stone Cold you said that The Rock doesn't scare you, well The Rock wouldn't want you to be scared, running away and crying. The Rock wants you to feel important so that you will come down to the ring and put on one hell of a show. Where you got it wrong though is when you said that this was your ring, and your championship. No, this is The People's ring, and that championship belongs to the People. So who better to work his way up the ladder by climbing rung after d@mn rung after d@mn rung to get to the top, beat you, in The People's ring, for the People's world championship, then the People's champion himself? You are right about Mayhem though, there will be Mayhem, there will be Carnage, and there will be a dead rattlesnake. You think The Rock has a big ego? No The Rock does not have a big ego, he just fights a lot of boys like you who are jealous. There will be no giving up from The Rock. The Rock is going to grow old in this ring, and he will keep coming down the people's ramp, getting into the People's ring, using the People's walker saying *using old man voice* JUST BRING IT! *stops using old man voice.* Once that is over with The Rock will go on into this world championship tournament and become the world champion and that is guarand@mnteed! Since we will be having ourselves a party, The Rock will bring the whoopin', and you bring the @$$, we'll just see who gets the better of the deal. How does that sound to you Stone Cold? IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW THAT SOUNDS TO YOU! If The Rock gave a d@mn what mattered to you and what didn't he would ask you and actually give a crap about what you say. No The Rock doesn't care so to make it plain and simple, come Mayhem, Stone Cold Steve Austin, The Rock, One on One, fair match, no stipulations needed, The Rock will beat your candy @$$. And that's the bottom line.......no that's not right. Stone Cold to be the man you have to beat......no wrong one. Ok I got it I got it, I am the best there is The Best there was and the....no hell no that's d@mn sure not it. Oh yes I got it now, the most electrifying phrase in all of sports entertainment...IF YA SMELLLLLLLLLLLLALALALALAOW......WHAT THE ROCK.....IS COOKIN'!
*The Rock throws the microphone behind him as The Rock's music plays again. The fans rise back up out of their seats chanting for The Rock. He gets back up on the turnbuckle and raises his hand in the air, then smells the air, and raises the eyebrow. He smiles at the cheering of the crowd and gets down. The Rock steps through the ropes and hops down to the floor. He makes his way back up to the top of the ramp and disappears behind the curtain.*
OOC: My first ever real Rock rp, it's not too shabby I don't think.
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