AUSTIN 3:16
*Stone Cold is sitting on the plain with Debra at his side trying to relax in the seat. The flight attendant offers Stone Cold some peanuts, but he just stares her down and she moves on. He turns to Debra.*
Austin: That Angle is nothing more than a low down dirty son of a crying b!tch. The Biggest show wrestlemania. Like he knows what it's even about. Someone needs to teach that piece of olympic trash a lesson. He acts like I give a rats @$$ what he plans on not WHAT?! NOT doing. Which is losing his title to me. I mean hell this isn't the nineteen ninety six olympics. There isn't going to be a lot of crying for joy, more like crying because he's a danged sissy, and his going to get a Stone Cold @$$ whippin'. The thousands of fans in the arena, and the millions watching on TV world wide will get what they want and that's a new champion. This isn't the olympics, this is the Extreme Wrestling Federation where the real athletes are. Then he wants to go on about Stevie Richards. Well I hope he takes great pride in that. I wanted to lose to Stevie. If you think about it, Kurt Angle sees Stevie Richards beat Stone Cold, and Kurt gets overly cocky. Kurt screws up, and loses. Kurt wants to try and find me, hell yeah I'm the bald guy the one that's stomping a mudhole in his @$$ then walking that som b!tch dry! I'm d@mned proud to be a loud, foul mouthed, beer swilling, finger gesturing, bionic redneck, tough son of a b!tch. We don't live in no trailor park, hell we got one fine house in good ol' Victoria Texas, with the woods out back where I hunt wild Kurt Angles, I mean Jack @$$es. How in the hell that kid got to hold that championship we'll never know, because if he wants to talk about losing streaks, he has been getting his royal olympic @$$ handed to him, night after night, after night. Time, and Time, and Time again. The Undertaker, Triple H, I wonder if those two names ring a bell. Two names that have beat the living crap out of him, but I have taken both of those boys and whipped their @$$es! So where he gets the idea that he is un-beatable, must be in those dreams, right about the same place he holds on to the idea that he is going to win Wrestlemania. He is the biggest moron just for thinking that he is the best there is. I guess I should thank him for congratulating me, but that would mean I actually give a d@mn. Had his sorry @$$ been in it too I would have thrown his @$$ over the top. Then just like the rest of those sorry b@st@rds Stevie Included I'd have another beer. Come Wrestlemania, Kurt will have to realize that I am not some just some bald no talent jobber, rather I am Stone Cold Steve Austin. The next EWF Heavy Weight Champion. Going to Wrestlemania, it's not two of the greatest superstars, it's the greatest superstar, plus Kurt Angle. That is where I will get a hold of that stupid dumb S-O-B, and I will do what everone around here has been waiting for and shut his @$$ up! Hell if that boy wants something to be true how about the words of Austin 3:16 that says Stone Cold will whip his @$$!
*Stone Cold looks over to find that Debra is snoring and fast asleep.*
*Stone Cold arrives at the arena carrying his camoflauge carrying case, and walking into the arena as he is stopped by Todd Pettingill.*
Todd: Stone Cold, as you may or may not have heard, Angle has been here already and had some pretty harsh comments said towards you. How do you feel about that and your upcoming match against Kurt Angle for the Extreme Wrestling Federation's World Heavy Weight Championship this Sunday at the Pay-Per-View Wrestlemania I?
Stone Cold: What?! You think I give a crap about Kurt Angle? What?! You think I give a crap about Kurt Angle? WHAT?! HELL NO! I don't give one single bit of crap about Kurt Angle! Hell the kid does make me laugh, by showing his intelligance by coming out on national television and saying such bright things as whoopi-doo. I'm tellin' ya Todd this kid is a boy genius. Then he sits here and states things that everyone already knows. This Sunday, at the PPV, me kicking his @$$. Yeah everyone already knows that is what's going to happen and is hopefully already prepared for that. They better have my customized belt ready, because I'm not leaving that arena until my belt is around my waist. The boy thinks I'm nothing, I wonder how nothing he's going to think I am when I'm knocking his d@mned teeth in! He thinks that it is just some easy ride at the top, just because he's had an aweful lot handed to him recently. Hell he knows, I know, and everyone knows he never deserved that title in the first place. So he can call me a loser all he d@mn well pleases, because it won't change the fact of me whippin' his @$$. At least Kurt has one thing down, I'm going to drink me a few beers, doesn't mean I'll be drunk, but I'll have a few beers to wash down that lunch I had. The Cheese Burger, Fries, Onion Rings, two tacos, a burrito, another cheese burger, and a side salad to keep my figure nice and lean. I won't be drunk at Wrestlemania, contrary to popular belief there is something more important to me than beer, and that's the title that he won't be holding for much longer. He need not continue ranting and raving about the people he's faced recently, because though he's beaten them, they have also beaten him, and hell I've whipped all their @$$es at some point in time. He also needs to stop worrying about Raven, because that's not important right now. If he wants to know why I'm called the Rattlesnake, it's because it's DTA. Don't Trust Anybody, and Don't Trust Austin. He will strike you down at any given time. You can't tell, and no you can't just squash a rattlesnake. It isn't that easy. I know what you would do when facing a rattlesnake, he would run and cry. Cry Cry Cry, that's all he ever does. Then wants to talk about how he's the greatest, about like the kid touching R. Kelly. Hell no I don't think those people will help me win the title. If anyone needs the help it's Angle. I haven't needed help to this day, and I'm not going to start now. I don't really care of the people love me or hate me, it doesn't really make a difference. What matters is that they hate Angle, and that even after every last tear Kurt has shed in the past week will be for nothing but getting my boot shoved straight up his @$$! I hear he's already been challenging people in the back again, but all he's doing is waisting time, and trying to fill his own space to make himself feel like he actually means something, but what he seems to forget is that he'll be with the world's toughest son of a b!tch in the ring. If he wants bloodshed it won't be by his own will, but I'll be sure that there is plenty of olympic bloodshed spread all over. I'll stomp every single one of those little tear drops right out of his tiny little head. AND THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE 'CUZ STONE COLD SAID SO!
Todd: Ok Thank you for your time Stone Cold.
*Stone Cold walks past Todd and is finally able to enter the building where he goes straight for the locker room.*
*Stone Cold is in the locker room fixing his knee brace when President Ashlee walks in.*
Ashlee: Steve, I just wanted to let you know that you have my full support in this match. I hope you go out there and kick some ass and bring that title to the corporation where it belongs.
Stone Cold: Hell, just so you know, I really don't give a d@mn what other people want from me. You know as well as the rest of them know that I joined you, because I know who it is I need to be aligned with to get to the top. So far you've lived up to your end of the bargain and now Stone Cold will do what he does best and that's go out to that ring and open a can of whoop-@$$! Stone Cold is sick and tired of sissies, cry babies, long nosed pinnochio wannabe's, and dead guy's going for that title. It's time that the world finds out what a true champion is. Not some lame @$$ wannabe olympian who is so full of himself he sells out an arena by just buying seats for his ego. Noone gives a d@mn about Kurt Angle, and as long as he is champion, noone is going to give a rats @$$ about that World Championship either. You just remember what I told you and worry about that. After I kick Kurt's @$$ which I know I will do, you take that money I sent you, and pick up my customized belt. If Stone Cold is going to be a champion, he's going to show everyone what a champion should look like. I don't care if you don't like it, I don't care of Kurt doesn't like it, hell right now I don't care of Debra doesn't like it, everyone will just have to deal with the fact that Stone Cold Steve Austin is the next Extreme Wrestling Federation's World Heavy Weight Champion, and finally someone will be able to take that Angle kid's mouth and shut it up, because everyone is sick and tired of him talking. All he does is walk around, and come out to the ring, waisting TV time and your money with his cheap pyrotechnics. Just to come out to the ring, grab himself a little microphone and have Kurt's Crying Time in the middle of the ring. That stupid son of a b!tch is going to learn the lesson that most everyone else has learned, and that's you don't mess with Stone Cold Steve Austin.
*Ashlee looks at Stone Cold, as he stands up, and walks past her right out the locker room door and down the hallway.*
*Stone Cold comes walking out from behind the curtain wearing his usual shorts, his black leather vest with a skull, and 3:16 embroidered in silver lettering on the front. On the back it reads Stone Cold with the silver embroidery. He has his knee brace on his left knee and wearing his black boots down to the ring. He walks with his usual attitide down the ramp way and steps up the steps to the ring apron. Austin looks around at the crowd for a second, some cheering because it's Stone Cold, others booing because he's corporate. He steps through the middle rope and enters the ring. Stone Cold goes to one corner and hops up onto the second turnbuckle. Cameras flash as he throws both hands into the air. He hops down and walks to the turnbuckle on the opposite end. Austin pauses for a moment then jumps up onto that middle turnbuckle throwing his arms in the air with the cameras flashing. He jumps down and continues to do the same routine until he has done all four turnbuckles. Stone Cold walks to the ring ropes by the announcers booth and requests a microphone. Tony Chimel is there to hand him one. Austin walks back to the center of the ring.*
Stone Cold: This is it Angle. Here is your last chance. You might as well get down on your knees and start begging for mercy because this is the time that Stone Cold opens a can of whoop-@$$ to take out America's Olympic Zero. Gold medals, Gold medals, like anyone gives a crap. Hell son what was that six years ago? Glory days are gone Kurt. Just because you have a title around your waist doesn't mean you are now who you once were. Your time is gone and you just can't seem to let go. With the way you carry that title you have now, you might as well just be carrying a piece of tin on a string. You don't bring any respect to that championship. Hell sone you don't bring respect to a d@mned thing you around. All you deserve is a tissue and some cheese to go with that whine. I'll tell you the absolute only person who gives a d@mn about Kurt Angle is Kurt Angle. This isn't an Olympic thing, this isn't six years ago thing, this is a me whippin' your @$$ thing. Mr. Angle is not the immortal he would like to believe he is. Just like what many of the others have been doing I to will whip your @$$. We're all sick and tired of you running your mouth like you're some kind of big shot, but all you are is the biggest piece of trash I have ever seen. That's why this Sunday at the Pay-Per-View, the first ever Extreme Wrestling Federation Wrestlemania, Stone Cold is going to go look in his book, then you are going to get a call on your little red white and blue cell phone. You are going to look at the ID on it and read on it the time, that time is going to be 3:16 the very same passage I will be reading in my book of Austin. What that means is before you could even react I will have whipped your @$$! From pillar to d@mn post, the fans sitting in every seat of this arena will get to see me take your @$$ up and down every aisle as I am stomping a mudhole in your @$$ larger than the grand canyon, I'll fill it with every one of your tears then I'll walk that som b!tch dry! All you can do is Cry. Cry for me Kurt, Cry. WHAT?! Cry! WHAT? Cry! WHAT?! I said you are going to cry, cry like a baby. Show the world your true colors aren't red white and blue, they are just yellow. All you have done is sat there and p!ssed me off. That's just something you don't do to Stone Cold Steve Austin. Ya silly b@st@rd Kurt. You can take your little @$$ and train all you want, and work as hard as you want, because I don't give a d@mn, you will look across the ring from you, and you will look directly into the dark, beedy, black, cold, eyes of the rattlesnake then I will whip your sorry @$$ at Wrestlemania, AND THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE....WHAT?! AND THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE.....WHAT?! I SAID AND THAT'S THE BOTTOM LINE 'CUZ STONE COLD SAID SO!
*Stone Cold throws down the microphone and walks over to the turnbuckle. He jumps up on the middle of it, and throws a couple of birdies in the air saying "Here's to ya Kurt". He then calls for a couple of beers, and the beer guy up front throws them to him. Stone Cold catches the both of them, and opens them. Once opened he slams them together in the air, then turns them upside down as he downs them. The cans empty and the throws them down to the floor. Stone Cold hops down off of the turnbuckle, and steps out of the ring. He walks up the ramp with that same p!ssed off determined look he had walking down there. More of the fans are cheering now, and the eventually disappears behind the curtain.*
OOC: Don't Question my abilities.
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