Hello, I'm Ryan Seacrest, and tonight we have some good and bad news.
Simon has come down with a really bad case of the Norwegian Flu, preventing his
attendance tonight. However taking his place as judge is HWC HardcoreSuperStar...

Ladies and gentlemen, get ready for the last night of tryouts for Hollywood here on...

The first contestant tonight is Sherman Jay.  Good luck Sherm.

(Sherman walks into the tryout room and stands in front Paula, Ace, and Randy.)

Ok, Sherman, what are you going to be performing for us tonight?

I am going to be performing my own rendition of I'm To Sexy.

Well let's here it.

It wasn't too bad.  I think he should come to Hollywood.  
What about you Randy?

(Randy hesitates and then chuckles)

Sherman, Sherman, Sherman.  That was unique.  Interesting.  And very different.
And you're image might be off, and the age too, I think you might be able to make it.
What about you Ace?

Picture a cat, on it's deathbed screeching.  That painful sound, was 100X better
than your singing.  You stink.

(Ace gets up from his chair and walks around the desk)

The hell with this.  I'm going to show you how to be an American Idol!!

(Ace delivers a superkick on Sherman Jay and leaves the tryout room.  The camera cuts to Ryan)

Well that's all the time we have for American Idol tonight folks.  Tune in tomorrow to see
who will be the next American Idol!!

(Cut to commercial)