What the hell happened to my nose? Would you just look at my sexy pout?!? That's all acting right there. I'm saying, "Hi big boy, wanna play?" Huh? What do you mean I just look constipated?!? Damnit, that's not constipation, that's pure sex! It is too. Oh, just forget it.
Now, don't let the picture fool you, I'm really a much darker shade of pasty white. I, unfortunately, bought a piece of shit digital camera from the Home Shopping Network so this picture, like all the pictures I take with the camera, came out like crap. But, don't get me started on how much I hate the Home Shopping Network...commie bastards.
Name: Rebekka (Sorry, no last name, ya know cuz of stalkers and all...hey, I watch America's Most Wanted, so I know all about it)
Location: New Castle, Delaware- the mullets run wild here.
Occupation: I recently graduated from Beauty School- Laugh, I dare you. I use to shampoo hair part-time at some ritzy salon, but I quit because I hate snotty bitches. Now, I'm working on getting my communications degree.
Funniest Song Lyric: "I've learned when you drink Absolut straight it burns enough to give my chest hairs a perm" - Method Man
Best Line From Movie: Pyle, you had best unfuck yourself and start shitting me Tiffany cufflinks or I definitely fuck you up!- Full Metal Jacket
Favorite Fast Food: #6 w/barbaque sauce from Wendy's.
Favorite Cartoon Character: Danger Mouse
Favorite Sayings: So, do you want a cookie or something?
Hobbies: Taping porn over Disney movies and playing card games with my sister...I know, I know, I have no life, just shut up, ok?
Deep Thought: I'd rather be a smartass then a dumbass.
Pet-peeves: I hate people who ask stupid questions. And don't even get me started on people who claim that there's no such thing as a stupid question, because they're usually the morons who ask them...
Most Embarrassing Moment: When I was in 5th grade I fell off the stage while singing in the school talent show. Yeah, and I've been emotionally distraught ever since. *Bangs head on desk*
Favorite Name of a Porno: Cum on Eileen
Last Stupid Thing You Did: I took the monthly special "5 dollars off perms" sign, at school, and changed it to 5 dollars off sperm. It was the least I could do, you know, 'cause the going price of sperm these days is just so outlandish.
Where do you see your self in 10 years: In jail for trying to super glue myself to Joaquin Phoenix.
People Ask the Funniest Things
Q.) Do you really have blue streaks?
A.) Yeah, blue manic panic is the best. There's just one problem, it's only semi-permanent so whenever I'm outside I always pray it doesn't rain.
Q.) Did it hurt when you got your eyebrow ring?- Stupid question....
A.) No, it fucking tickled.
Q.) Who took that picture of you?
A.) I did. Damn, I have so many skills.
Q.) Hahahahaha, you went to Beauty School?
A.) Correction, I graduated from Beauty School and I don't see what's so funny. Wait, let me guess, you're one of those dicks who doesn't go to a salon because there was a special on Flobes at
WalMart, aren't you? Yeah, you're a real winner...
Q.) Do you have anyone that you look up to?
A.) I look up to Britney Spears...she's got a lot of weight to carry around on her chest.
Q.) Have you even been to England?
A.) Uh, I've hardly been out of Delaware.
Q.) Oh my God, I've never heard a girl talk like that before! Do you kiss your mom with that mouth?
A.) No jackass, I kiss her with another one. Excuse me if I happen to find 4 letter words appealing. I don't drink, I don't smoke, drug-free and proud, my only problem is I curse. I think I'm doing pretty good...
Q.) What other entertainers do you like besides Robbie Williams?
A.) I like old movies so most of the movie stars I like are dead, which is kinda depressing when you think about it, but I don't really think, so there you go. Oh, but I do love Joaquin Phoenix, who, thankfully, is still alive. Yeah, yum, he's one sexy bitch.
Music wise I listen to Otis Redding, Frank Sinatra, Mindless Self Indulgence, G Love & Special Sauce, John Denver- Wahoo! Thank God I'm A Country Boy, Filter, Glam Rock like Gary Glitter, late 80's early 90's rap- Snoop Dogg is my favorite, and of course Elvis. True story...my mom's first husband was in the same company as Elvis during the war. She even got to meet him a couple times. Yeah, my mom is super fancy.
Q.) You're strange, do you know that?
A.) Strange? Are you trying to insult me? I see. You're just jealous because my mom got to meet Elvis aren't you?
Q.) You're a fucking bitch whore.
A.) Really? Does this mean we can't be friends?
If you have a question, comment, and/or if you just wish to defecate your mindless drivel on someone then email me at RockDJGroupie