when she's nervous.
she can't hold her hands still.

first class mail couldn't even get this to you in time.
these paper cuts are deep enough to fill with dirt and,
every saturday i................
around this time of night. i sit on my floor.
every word is that much closer to me filling up this glass with I miss you's
as akward and i may seem....one night to me can determine forever.....
or maybe i love you...
if I left my house. Would you come and at least be my bed's guest?
I'd crucify myself to smell your body on my bed sheets the next day.
My left hand bleeding. I cut off my thumb for Monday.
My fingers too. until Friday.
I waited too long to tell you my
my price for my lover's touch
count the stars. I grab your jeans.
I feel your tongue on mine.
Im sorry. But whats your.... Name...
excuse my gag reflex
my feelings flow out of my throat.
Okay. Here. I wish you were here.
i'd put on the best mix cd.
lay on my bed
put your head on my chest
and want you to cry. to get it all out.
and run my fingers through your hair.
and kiss the top of your head.
and my love. i'd be crying myself.
i know exactly what you need.
Just please for my sake don't realize it.
Please. Let me sound like an actor until I get too tired.
My feet running until I hit that door.
Getting out of town. I need that rejection.
I need the smog flavored air.