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ARITE YOU GUYZ ASKED FOR IT, ANOTHER PAGE OF JOKEZ JUST FOR YOU! ENJOY RESPONSIBLY IF YA KNOW WHAT I MEAN LOL!
Boudreaux an' Thibodeaux were planning to go fishing the next morning. The night before, as Boudreaux got into bed, his wife, Clotile, asked him what he was doing the next day. Boudreaux replied, "Me an' Thib are going fishing!" She jumped up with excitement, "Boudreaux, let me go with you!" Boudreaux said, "no,no,no, last time you wanted to go, i wasted my time trying to get you up, and you didn't budge, no way!" Clotile replied, "Boudreaux, i promise i will wake up this time." Boudreaux said,"okay, Clotile, on one condition; if you decide you don't want to get up, and i waste my time again, you either have to suck my dick or let me fuck you up the ass." She said, "okay, i promise." The next morning at 5am, Boudreaux woke Clotile up and yelled,"okay, time to get up". "Oh, no, no, nooo im too tired", Clotile mumbled. Boudreaux got pretty pissed. "okay, thats it, you either have to suck my dick or let me fuck you up the ass." Clotile said, "okay i'll suck your dick." She started pleasuring Boudreaux with a nice head job, when her face popped up and said, "Boudreaux, your dick tastes like shit!!!" He said, "I know, Thibodeaux didn't want to come either!!!
There was a guy laying on a nude beach with a newspaper over his penis. a little girl walked up to him and asked him what do you have under the newspaper? he said a birdie, she said oooh can i play with it? he said no im gettin ready to go to sleep. the man goes to sleep and wakes up in the hospital. he asks the docter what happened to me? the doctor said lemme go get this little girl to tell u what happened. the little girl walks in and says well mister i was tryin to get the birdie out of his nest and he spit on me, so i broke his neck, cracked his eggs and lit his nest on fire!!!
A man walks into a Pharmacy and says to the beautiful female teller, "Umm... err, I've never purchased condoms before, and I don't know what size to buy." "That's okay. You can test your size on the fence out in back." So the man walks out back and he sees three holes. Just as he prepares to stick his penis in the first hole, the beautiful teller sneaks over to the other side of the fence. The man sticks his penis through the first hole where it is gently caressed by the teller. Then he pulls it it out and sticks it through the second hole where the teller begins to suck his penis and give him a blow job. Then, finally, he pulls it out and sticks it in the third hole. The teller takes her vagina, wraps it around his penis, and begins to hump it. She quickly pulls up her pants and scurries back inside where the man is begining to stumble back in. She starts to giggle and says, "Have you decided on the appropriate size?" "Screw the condoms! Just give me 3 yards of that fence!"
There once was a bear hunter who was having no luck in finding his quarry. All at once, he felt a tap on his shoulder from behind. It was a huge grizzly bear. The hunter's shock was increased when the bear spoke to him. "You are hunting me, I'll bet", said the bear. "You may choose your punishment. Either I will maul you to death or fuck you up the arse!" The hunter didn't want to die, so he consented to give the bear the pleasure of his booty. The bear left satisfied and the hunter returned to his cabin. The next day, the hunter decided to kill the bear for revenge. But, as luck would have it, the grizzly found him first. Once again, the hunter felt the tap on his shoulder and the bear made his request. The hunter dropped his pants, bent over, and took what the beast had to offer. The third day, the hunter was really irate and decided he would torture and kill that bear! Once more, though, the bear was the better hunter. When the man felt the familiar tap on his shoulder, he expected to hear the grizzly's offer of a choice again, but this time the bear just said, "You're not really into this for the hunting anymore, are you?!
Cinderella wants to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother won't let her. As Cinderella sits crying in the garden, her fairy godmother appears, and promises to provide Cinderella with everything she needs to go to the ball, but only on two conditions. "First, you must wear a diaphragm." Cinderella agrees. "What's the second condition?" "You must be home by 2 a.m. Any later, and your diaphragm will turn into a pumpkin." Cinderella agrees to be home by 2 a.m. The appointed hour comes and goes, and Cinderella doesn't show up. Finally, at 5 a.m., Cinderella shows up, looking love-struck and **very** satisfied. "Where have you been?" demands the fairy godmother. "Your diaphragm was supposed to turn into a pumpkin three hours ago!!!" "I met a prince, Fairy Godmother. He took care of everything." "I know of no prince with that kind of power! Tell me his name!" "I can't remember, exactly...Peter Peter,something or other...."
Three women sitting in a bar having a drink. Their boyfriends are all named Georgie. One day they decide to name their boyfriends after softdrinks to tell the difference between them. The first one says "I'll name mine 7-up because he's seven inches and always up." The second one says "I'll name mine MOUNTAIN DEW because he likes to mount and do me." And the third one says "I'll name mine Jack Daniels." The others say "Hey! That's not a softdrink that's a hard licker!". She says "That's My Georgie!!"
Two guys go golfing. One guy hits the ball into a buttercup patch. He heard a voice coming from the patch, it said that if he hit the ball out, he would never get any butter on anything for the rest of his life. The guy is of course very freaked out and calls for his partner, " Where are you?" he yells. His partner replies. "In the pussy willow". The first guy screams. "For the love of God, don't swing!"
