Pornography Aisle
Pornography Aisle: Written by Jarrod Thomas, Brad O'Neil, and Chris Carper, produced by Thomas and O'neil. SDCC's trademark hit, "Pornography Aisle" was entirely composed at the back of the bus ride home from a concert/tri-meet at Rockbridge County High School. The song, which was released on October 3, 2002, became SDCC's break-out hit single, spending 703 weeks and counting at the top of the Metopian Music Charts. Also recieved the prestigious award of 10 points on Little Lichy's Funny List. On a side note, all copies of the censored version of "Pornography Aisle" were lost recently when they were mysteriously tossed out a high window onto an exploding bomb, before being further crushed by a falling piano.
Pornography Aisle
Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale,
a tale of a porno flick,
That started on this grocery aisle,
With this guy fucking this chick.
SPEC: He's fucking her with his dick.
(Crash! Boom!)
Well, a sailor was a-watchin' them,
A sailor eating corn!
And he sat right back in an easy chair,
For a three hour porn.
SPEC: A three hour porn.
(Woman's orgasmic scream.)
Well the bangin' started getting rough,
The bitch's tits were tossed,
Because she spread her legs so wide,
Her virginity was lost.
SPEC: Her virginity was lost.
(Wam! Bam! Thank you, ma'am!)
And so he started fucking her with things he found on the aisle.....
Like pickles,
and barbeque sauce.
Bill Clinton,
and some piiiiiieeeee.
Cap'n Crunch,
Some cabbage and leg of lamb,
On Pornography Aisle!!!!!!!
(spoken) Smack yo bitch up.
Special parts ("SPEC") were sung by Jarrod Thomas, Brad O'Neil, and Shawn Wheeler. The Spoken line at the end was said by Shawn Wheeler.