The Penis Song

The Penis Song: Written by Eric Idle. Arranged by Brad O'Neil. Song included on the album at the last minute by O'Neil because every member has at least one of what this song is about. Essentially it is a forty-two second song about the male genitalia with a simple piano part. Actually, that's really all anyone can say about this song, except that it first appeared in the movie "Monty Python And The Meaning Of Life." (1983) The original title for Monty Python's version was "The Not Noel Coward Song," but SDCC called their version "The Penis Song," mainly because no one in the band knows who Noel Coward is.

The Penis Song

Good evening ladies and gentlemen, here's a little number I tossed up recently in the Carribean.
Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis?
Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong?
It's swell to have a stiffy,
It's divine to own a dick,
From the tiniest little tadger
To the world's biggest prick.
So three cheers for your willie or John Thomas!
Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake!
Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend, your Percy or your cock,
You can wrap it up in ribbons, you can slip it in your sock.
But don't take it out in public or they will stick you in the dock,
and you won't come back.
Thank you very much.