The Official Headquarters of The 2004 Metopian Olympic Team
Welcome to the official website of the Metopian Olympic Movement! Metopia is proud to be represented in Athens by 105 athletes in 21 different athletic disciplines. Browse the links below for more information, and check back starting August 11 for updates on how our teams are doing!!
Links
Olympic Roster
Olympic entries
Track and Field Olympic Trials results
Metopia Medal Count
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Results
August 29
Athletics
Marathon: final
Lasse VIREN Jr.: 2:11:55 (3rd!!!)
Haichoge KIPLAGEBRSELASSIE: 2:13:17 (8th)
Coach CLIFTON: 2:20:06 (39th)
Water Polo loser's round: Metopia 8, Croatia 7; 9th overall
Wrestling 60kg class tournament: Jon LICHTENSTEIN: lost to Yandro Miguel QUINTANA (CUB); eliminated
August 28
Athletics
Javelin final:
Sir LEE: 85.26 2nd!!!!
Brandon SPALDING: 83.77 6th
VORK the Alien: 80.12 12th
800m final:
Bard NILSSON: 1:44.60 2nd!!! (PR)
Cullen O'NEIL: 1:44.93 5th
5000m final:
Brad O'NEIL: 13:17.52 6th
Robert ZIMMERMAN: 13:17.68 8th
Ron CREWS: 13:17.71 9th
Mountain Bike cross-country: Sir SCHOTTENFROIDA 23rd (2:26:16); Sir VYBORNY 31st (2:29:54)
Sailing keelboat: RED/SAM Last Race: 13th; overall: 98 points, 15th
Wrestling 60kg class: Jon LICHTENSTEIN: beat Purevbaatar OYUNBILEG (MGL), beat Eric GUERRERO (USA), advanced to tournament
Wrestling 74kg class: Willie ROBINSON: lost to Murad GAIDAROV (BLR), lost to Salvatore RINELLA; eliminated
Wrestling 96 kg class: COBRA: lost to Fatih CAKIROGLU (TUR), lost to Aleksandr SHEMAROV (BLR); eliminated
August 27
Athletics
50K Race Walk final:
Strong BRAD: 4:06:43, 29th
Atticus RUNNER: DQ (foot off ground rule)
Man on BICYCLE: DQ (use of bicycle)
Pole Vault final:
Sir Vyborny SELIVANOV: 5.80m (19-0), 5th (MR)
110m hurdles final:
Jormungand W. WAYNERIGHT: 12.92, 2nd!!! (MR)
INTANGIR: 12.93, 3rd!!!
Kayak K1 1000m final: Sir Vyborny SELIVANOV 3:28.310, 4th
Taekwando under 68kg tournament: Sir Dark SOLILOQUY: beat Mohamed OMRANI (TUN) 7-2, lost to Gabriel SAGASTUME (GUA) 5-4
Water Polo loser's round: USA 6, Metopia 5
Wrestling -55kg class: John "The Phantom" GUSTER beat Babak, NOURZAD (IRI), lost to Hyo Sub KIM (KOR); eliminated
Wrestling -66kg class: Brandon SPALDING beat Apostolos TASKOUDIS (GRE), lost to Elbrus TEDEYEV (UKR), eliminated
Wrestling -84kg class: The ASSASSIN lost to Shamil ALIEV, lost to Sazhid SAZHIDOV (RUS), eliminated
Wrestling -120kg class: Hurricane BOB: lost to Bozhidar BOYADZHIEV, beat Barys HRYNKEVICH, eliminated
August 26
Athletics
Javelin qualifying:
Sir LEE: 84.96m, Q
Brandon SPALDING: 83.45m, Q
VORK the Aliem: 82.17m, Q
Long Jump final:
Willie ROBINSON: 8.30m, 5th
110m hurdles semifinals:
INTANGIR: 13.11 Q
Jormungand W. WAYNERIGHT: 13.10 Q
800m semifinals:
Cullen O'NEIL: 1:45.89 Q
Bard NILSSON: 1:45.91 q
400m hurdles final:
An CLINTON: 47.83, 2nd!!!!
George ADDAX: 48.03, 3rd!!!!
An ADDAX: 48.13, 4th
200m final:
Horst HASH: 20.10, 4th
Hyperion SMITH: 20.38, 8th
Modern Pentathlon final: Sir Dark SOLILOQUY: 27th
Sailing keelboat: RED/SELIVANOV: Race 9: 14th and Race 10: 6th; overall=12th
Taekwando tournament: $hawn WHEELER beat Seyfula MAGOMEDOV (RUS), beat Paul GREEN (GBR), lost to Juan RAMOS (ESP), lost to Francisco SALAZAR BLANCO Oscar (MEX), eliminated
Triathlon final: Cimmaron CRAIG: 1:51:!5.60, 2nd!!!
Wrestling 96 kg Greco-Roman medals tournament: The BOUNCER: beat Gogi KOGUASHVILI (RUS), beat Masoud HASHEMZADEH (IRI),
lost to Karam IBRAHIM (EGY), 2nd!!!
August 25
Athletics
Women's javelin qualifying:
Lady RYAN: 62.11m, Q
Pole Vault first round:
Sir Vyborny SELIVANOV: 5.70m (18-8), Q (PR)
Hurricane BOB: 5.50m (18-1) dnq
Jamie BRIE: 5.50m (18-1)
5000m qualifying:
Brad O'NEIL: 13:18.28, Q
Robert ZIMMERMAN: 13:21.85, Q
Ron CREWS: 13:22.35, q
800m qualifying:
Cullen O'NEIL: 1:44.86, Q
Bard NILSSON: 1:45.35, Q (PR)
MARC LAW: 1:46.55, dnq
110m hurdles round two:
INTANGIR: 13.12, Q
Jormungand W. WAYNERIGHT: 13.05, Q
200m semifinals:
Horst HASH: 20.10, Q
Hyperion SMITH: 20.61, q
Beach Volleyball bronze medal game: SELIVANOV/SOLILOQUY lost to HEUSCHER/KOBEL (SUI) 2-1, 4th
Cycling Madison: Roger TAYLOR/Brian MAY: 22 points, 1st!!!
Kayak K1 1000m semifinal: Sir Vyborny SELIVANOV: 1st in 3:28.417; advanced to final
Sailing Windsurfer final: Jonathan GALADON: 11th; overall finished 10th with 98 points
Sailing keelboat: RED/SELIVANOV: Race 7: 11th, Race 8: 16th; overall: 12th
Water Polo loser's round: Metopia 10, Kazahkstan 5
Wrestling: Greco-Roman 96kg class: The BOUNCER: beat Mirko ENGLICH (GER), beat David Saldadze (UKR); advanced to next round
August 24
Athletics
110m hurdles first round:
INTANGIR: 13.15, Q
Jormungand W. WAYNERIGHT: 13.12, Q
An ADDAX: DNS
200m first round:
Horst HASH: 20.61, Q
John CHEESE: 20.52, Q
Hyperion SMITH: 20.65, Q
200m second round:
Horst HASH: 20.42, Q
Hyperion SMITH: 20.52, Q
John CHEESE: DNF
Women's Pole Vault final:
Tara ALTIZER: 4.55m, 5th
Long Jump qualifying:
Hurricane BOB: 6.3m, dnq
Willie ROBINSON: 8.20m, Q
Jim WON'TIS: 8.01m, dnq
400m hurdles semifinals:
An CLINTON: 48.21, Q
George ADDAX: 48.23, Q
An ADDAX: 48.31, Q
3000m steeplechase final:
Adolf HITLER VII: 8:19.76, 14th (MR)
Decathlon final results:
Jacksonville FORD: 8003, 17th
John WAYNE: 7755, 24th
Hurricane BOB: DNF
1500m final:
Bard NILSSON: 3:34.99, 4th
Sir Salty SAM: 3:39.45, 11th
Adolf HITLER VII: 3:43.17, 12th
Basketball 9-10 classification: Metopia 98, New Zealand 80; 9th
Cycling Sprint: semis: Sir SCHOTTENFROIDA beat Laurent GANE (FRA); final: beat Theo BOS (NED); 1st!!!!!
Sailing keelboat: RED/SELIVANOV Race 6: 13th; overall: 9th
Wrestling 84kg Greco-Roman: Christopher CHRONOPOLIS: lost twice
August 23
Athletics
400m hurdles first round:
An CLINTON: 48.33, Q
George CLINTON: 48.52, Q
An ADDAX: 48.55, Q
Discus final:
Freddy KYLOR: 65.07m, 5th
COBRA: 62.77m, 9th
400m final:
dnL MAN: 44.66, 4th (MR)
Basketball group play: Lithuania 100, Metopia 85
Beach Volleyball semifinal: Selivanov/Soliloquy lost to Bosma/Herrera (ESP) 2-0; play for bronze medal
Boxing Super-Heavy class quarterfinals: Hurricane BOB lost to Mohamed ALY (EGY) 19-11
Cycling Sprint: Sir SCHOTTENFROIDA beat FORDE (BAR) in 10.6
Cycling Team Pursuit: Metopia (Vyborny/Nobunaga/Salty Sam/Schottenfroida): 1st!!!!
Kayak K1 1000m heats: Sir Vyborny SELIVANOV: 2nd, advanced to semifinal
Sailing windsurfing: Jonathan GALADON: Race Nine: 3rd, Race 10: 3rd, Overall: 9th
Sailing keelboat: RED/SELIVANOV: Race Five: 5th; overall-9th so far
Water Polo group play: Metopia 6, Germany 6
August 22
Athletics
High Jump final:
Jim WON'TIS: 2.39m (7-9), 1st!!!
Stephen WINKLER: 2.25 (7-4), 11th
Triple Jump final:
"MAKO": 17.00m, 8th
100m semifinals:
INTANGIR: 10.03, Q
Tim WILLIS: 10.12, dnq
Sir SCHOTTENFROIDA: 10.13, dnq
Hammer Throw final:
Arthur COSGROVE: 80.15m (262-11), 3rd!!!
Sir IRONHORSE: 79.01m (259-2), 6th
1500m semifinals:
Adolf HITLER VII: 3:36.25, q
Sir Salty Sam SELIVANOV: 3:36.29, q
Bard Nilsson: 3:40.22, Q (1st in heat)
100m final:
INTANGIR: 9.89, 4th (MR)
Beach Volleyball: V. SELIVANOV/D. SOLILOQUY defeated DIECKMANN/SCEUERPFLUG 2-1; advance to semi-final
Track Cycling
Sprint: Sir SCHOTTENFROIDA: qualifying round: 10.177, 1st; round of 16: 10.510, 1st; quarterfinals: 10.520, 1st; advanced to semifinal
Team Pursuit Metopia (Schottenfroida/Vyborny/Salty Sam/Nobunaga): qualifying round: 4:00, 1st; first round: 3:56, 1st WR!!!!
Fencing team epee: Metopia (Neptars/Nobunaga/Blackthorn): first round: beat Egypt, semifinal: lost to Hungary, bronze medal match: lost to Germany; 4th overall
Gymnastics floor exercizes final: Sir Dark SOLILOQUY: 9.775, 3rd!!!
Sailing keelboat: Johnny Red/Salty Sam: Race Three: DNF; Race Four: 5th; overall currently 10th
August 21
Athletics
Discus prelims:
Freddy KYLOR 65.71m, Q
COBRA 63.97m, q
100m first round:
INTANGIR: 10.09, Q
Sir SCHOTTENFROIDA: 10.22, Q
Tim WILLIS: 10.11, Q
100m quarterfinals:
INTANGIR: 10.01, Q
Sir SCHOTTENFROIDA: 10.19, Q
Tim WILLIS: 10.05, Q
400m semifinals:
dnL MAN: 45.17, Q (MR)
3000m Steeplechase prelims:
Adolf HITLER VII: 8:20.40, Q
Cullen O'NEIL: 8:26.32, dnq
Man in 1986 CROWN VICTORIA: 8:27.19, dnq
Women's Pole Vault prelims:
Tara ALTIZER: 4.40m, q
Basketball group play: Puerto Rico 87, Metopia 82
Beach Volleyball round of 16: V. SELIVANOV/SOLILOQUY defeated RORICH/POCOCK (RSA) 2-0
Fencing team foil: (S. SELIVANOV/BONEZALOT/MIX-A-LITTLE) Quarterfinals: defeated South Korea 45-36; Semifinals: defeated USA 45-35; Final: lost to Italy 45-42, 2nd place overall
Football quarterfinals: Iraq 1, Metopia 0; Metopia is eliminated
Gymnastics trampoline final: Sir NEPTARS 4th; Sir Vyborny SELIVANOV 14th
Rowing medals race: Metopia (V. SELIVANOV/S. SELIVANOV/YYUNH/J. SELIVANOV) 5th
Sailing keelboat: Johnny RED/Salty Sam SELIVANOV: Race One 9th; Race Two 7th of Eleven Races, currently 8th overall
Water Polo group play: Greece 10, Metopia 9
August 20
Athletics 20 kilometer Walk final:
William WILLIAMSON: 1:20:01 3rd (MR)
Sir SHIZERDICK: 1:23:47 17th
ALLEN the Addax-God: 1:29:05 36th
Athletics Triple jump prelims:
"MAKO": 17.05m qualified
Jim WON'TIS: 16.88m DNQ
Man in KANGAROO SUIT: 16.62m DNQ
Athletics Hammer Throw prelims:
Sir IRONHORSE: 77.83m; qualified
Arthur COSGROVE: 77.77m; qualified
Hurricane BOB: 75.41m; DNQ
An CLINTON: 72.28m; DNQ
Athletics 1500m first round:
Bard NILSSON: 3:38.23-Q
Adolf HITLER VII 3:39.11-q
Sir Salty Sam SELIVANOV: 3:39.52-q
Athletics 400m first round:
dnL MAN: 45.41; qualified
Jeremy ROWE: 46.70; did not qualify
Athletics High Jump prelims:
Jim WON'TIS: 2.28m Q
Stephen WINKLER 2.28m Q
Jeremy ROWE 2.20m DNQ
Athletics Women's 800m first round:
Lady RYAN: 2:02.67 DNQ
Athletics 10,000m final:
Lasse VIREN Jr.: 27:29 (6th)
Colin NILSSON 27:32 (7th)
Steve POSTFONTAINE DNF
Boxing 60kg class round of 16: Sir LIGHTSTONE lost to Murat HRACHEV (RUS)
Boxing 57kg class round of 16: $hawn WHEELER lost to Alexei TITCHTENKO (RUS)
Judo 100+kg class: Hurricane BOB: first round, bye; second round, defeated Sergio COMACHO (COL); third round, defeated Martin BOONZAAYER (USA); quarterfinals, lost to Sayed MIRAN (IRN)
Sailing windsurfer: Jonathan GALADON: Race 5: 14th, Race 6: 8th, overall: 12th of 34
August 19
Basketball group play: USA 89, Metopia 79
Fencing Team sabre: Metopia (SEXXALOUGHT/PHILEAS/ROBIN): quarterfinal lost to Italy 45-44; loser's round beat Greece 45-39; 5th/6th match lost to Hungary 45-40; 6th overall
Sailing windsurfing: Jonathan GALADON: Race 4, 18th; currently stands 10th out of 34
Water Polo group play: Spain 8, Metopia 4
August 18
Athletics shot put prelims:
Hurricane BOB: 20.45m, qualified
INTANGIR: 20.10m, qualified
An CLINTON: 18.50m, did not qualify (38th place)
Athletics shot put final:
Hurricane BOB: 20.65m, 5th
INTANGIR: 19.93m, 11th
Beach Volleyball prelims: SELIVANOV/SELILOQUY defeated CHILD/HEESE (CAN) 2-1
Boxing Super-heavyweight class: Hurricane BOB defeated Victor BISBAL (PUR) 26-17
Cycling Time trial: Sir SCHOTTENFROIDA 23rd, Sir SALTY SAM 37th
Rowing men's four semis: Metopia (SELIVANOV/SELIVANOV/YYUNH/SELIVANOV) finished 2nd of 6th, advanced to Final A (Medals race)
Sailing windsurfing: Jonathan GALADON finished 17th in Race One, 3rd in Race Three out of 11 races, currently stands 5th overall
August 17
Badminton second round: Sir Dark SOLILOQUY lost to Seung Mo SHON, 15-9, 15-4; eliminated
Basketball group play: Metopia 83-Angola 59
Fencing epee: Sir NEPTARS: first round bye; second round defeated Paris INOSTROZA (CHI); third round defeated Alfredo ROTA (ITA); quarterfinal lost to Pavel KOLOBOV (RUS), 7th overall
Football match play: Argentina 1-Metopia 0
Football group overall: Metopia placed second in Group C with 4 points, advances to elimination round
Sailing windsurfing: Races Postponed. Race #1 from 8-15 was abandoned and will be rerun tomorrow. Jonathan GALADON currently stands in 7th place out of 34.
Tennis doubles: WILLIS/O'NEIL lost to KEIFER/SCHUETTLER (GER) 6-7, 3-6; eliminated
Tennis singles: Jarrod THOMAS lost to Sebastien GROSJEAN 6-7, 3-6; eliminated
Water Polo group play: Italy 8-Metopia 4
August 16
Badminton singles: Sir Dark SOLILOQUY defeated Marco VASCONCELOS (POR) 15-5, 15-5; advanced to next round.
Beach Volleyball prelims: SELIVANOV/SOLILOQUY lost to Heuscher/Kobel (SUI) 21-16, 20-22, 9-15
Boxing 56kg class: $hawn WHEELER defeated Ludumo GALADA (RSA); advances to second round
Boxing 60kg class: Sir LIGHTSTONE defeated Taoufik CHOBBA (TUN); advances to second round
Fencing foil: Sir Samuel "Salty Sam" SELIVANOV: first round bye; second round defeated Haikan WANG (CHN); third round defeated Dan KELLNER (USA); quarterfinals lost to Andrea CASSARA (ITA): 6th place overall
Judo 73kg class: Sir Dark SOLILOQUY lost to Krzysztof WILKOMIRS (POL)
Table Tennis doubles: FARTLEK/LIGHTSTONE lost to HEISTER/KEEN (NED); eliminated
Tennis singles: Jonathan REXRODE lost to Olivier ROCHUS (BEL) 6-3, 0-6, 1-6
Tennis doubles: WILLIS/O'NEIL defeated BERDYCH/NOVAK (CZE) 6-4, 6-3; advanced to second round
August 15
Women's Archery tournament: Maitresse FONCEE lost to Evangelina PSARRA 138-116, was eliminated
Basketball group play: Metopia lost to Greece 76-54
Judo 66kg class: $hawn WHEELER beat Juan PAZ (BOL) in the first rund, lost to Yordanis ARENCIBIA (CUB) in second round.
Sailing Windsurfing class: Jonathan GALADON 14th in Race 1; 7th in Race 2 of 11 races
Table Tennis first round: LIGHTSTONE/FARTLEK defeated MONDELLO/YANG (ITA); advance to next round
Tennis singles: Jarrod THOMAS beat Victor HANESCU (ROM) 6-4, 7-6; advanced to next round
Tennis doubles: REXRODE/THOMAS lost to GONZALEZ/MASSU (CHI) 7-5, 6-4; eliminated
Water Polo prelims: Metopia 14-Egypt 3
August 14
Beach Volleyball prelims: Selivanov/Soliloquy (MET) defeated Blanton/Nygaard (USA) 21-16, 21-14.
Boxing 178lb: Stingray lost to Ihsan Tarhan (Iran) in first round
Cycling Road road race: Sir Schottenfroida 10th; Lance Legstrong 33rd
Fencing Sabre: Sir Byrun Sexxalought, first round bye, second round defeated Fernando Medina (ESP), third round defeated by Vladimir Lukashenko (UKR)
Football group play: Metopia 5-Serbia-Montenegro 1
Gymnastics team and individual: Team, last. Dark Soliloquy 15th rings, 20th pommel horse, 10th floor (qualified)
Judo extra-lightweight: Jon Lichtenstein defeated by Craig Fallon (GBR)
Rowing men's four heats: Metopia placed econd, advances to next round
August 12
Women's Archery individual ranking round: Maitresse Foncee 596 57th place.
August 11
Men's Football Group play: Metopia 1-Tunisia 1
Reports from Athens
August 19
Track starts tomorrow so hopefully we can get out of this medal-less drought.
August 16
Not a whole lot important happened today. Just some prelims and crap. Sir Salty Sam came very close to earning Metopia's first medal, losing just one match short of the medal round.
August 15
Water Polo held the best performance of the day as the Metopians beat Egypt 14-3. Goalie Cullen O'NEIL was nearly unstoppable in the normally high-scoring sport. "We showed how great our national blitzball program is today. At the start of the day we were hardly known, but now the world knows Metopia means business. This is barely a workout compared to blitzball. You don't have to hold your breath, haha," O'Neil, a Kratopian, stated. The basketball team was less fortunate.
Jon GALADON's current standing in the overall classification of the windsurfing event was unofficial while the first race is still under review. The review is nothing that will disqualify GALADON but it does mean no one knows where anyone stands in the field of 24 at the end of the day. "There are still nine more races, anything can happen," GALADON, a retired baseball star and casual surfer/windsurfer, said.
Jarrod THOMAS and LIGHTSTONE/FARTLEK are still alive in tennis and table tennis, respectively, but $hawn WHEELER is out for judo as are REXRODE/THOMAS in the tennis doubles.
August 14
A good day for some Metopians, not so good for others. Jon Lichtenstein and Stingray both lost in the first rounds of judo and boxing respectively, and Sir Byrun Sexxalought lost in the third round of fencing sabre. But in the cycling road race, Metopia was well represented by it's national champion Sir Schottenfroida, who placed tenth, and Lance Legstrong, who place 33rd.
Meanwhile in the men's rowing fours, the Metopian team of Selivanov/Selivanov/Yyunh/Selivanov placed second in their heat to advance to the next round. The Metopian beach volleyballers won their first match vs. USA as well.
But the biggest story is the men's soccer team, who today beat Serbia-Montenegro 5-1 in group play. This gives Metopia some breathing room as they now have four points going into the last group match against gold-medal favorite Argentina. A win or a tie will ensure that Metopia get's through to the tournament portion of the competition, but even a loss will probably not keep them out of their current position of second place in Group C. Today's goals were scored by Sirs Bonezalot (1), Shizerdick (2) and Dark Soliloquy (2). "Soccer is one of more popular sports in Metopia so I'm very happy that our team has been so successfull," co-captain Sir Lightstone said. The team may get some defensive help from the Ryyan brothers, Sirs Lee and Klavetorian before the next match. "The two new players will help fill out our rosters and give us some help on defense, which we will need against the powerful Argentines," Lightstone added.
August 13
The Opening Ceremonies went off without a hitch. The Metopian delegation marched in with pride, though their costumes left something to be desired. You see, having blown all their money on buying off foreign athletes, the Olympic Committee had no more money to spend on clothing, so they had the athletes put on black S & M costumes with "Mutopia" written on the backs in crayon. (As for the misspelling, that is the result of the uniform designers being high at the time.) Nevertheless, it was a very proud moment for Metopia when it's greatest athletes entered the Olympic stadium. The delegation was led by the flag-bearer Sir Nobunaga, who was chosen at the last minute.
August 12
Maitresse Foncee took part in the women's archery ranking round today. She scored 596 to finish 57th out of 64. This will be her spot in the single elimination tournament that begins later this week. "It wasn't the best finish but what can you do? I'm off to play chess and screw" our native Archer stated. The three Korean archers finished 1-2-3 in the ranking round, with Sung Hyun Park setting a new World Record of 682.
August 11
The Metopian soccer team opened it's Olympic schedule with a 1-1 draw with Tunisia. Co-captain Sir Jerome Lafaire scored Metopia's lone goal in stoppage time of the first half on an assist from the other captain, Sir Lightstone. "It was a very physical game with many cautions," said forward Sir Vyborny. In all seven were cautioned, including Metopians Sir Dark Soliloquy, Shane Lechler, Man with Nine Legs, and Sir Fartlek. In the other Group C match, Argentina beat Serbia-Montenegro 6-0. "Argentina will be near impossible to beat, but I'm confident we can still get second and make it to the tournament" the Man with Nine Legs said afterwards. "GET THE HELL OUT OF MY WAY!!!" said Hurricane Bob, who is not, technically, on the team.
August 10
The Metopian team planes have arrived in Athens and the athletes are settling into their housing in the Olympic Village. The first competitions begin tomorrow, and Metopia's first competition will be in soccer with the Group Match against Tunisia, followed by the Women's Individual Archery Ranking Round with Maitresse Foncee the next day. The Opening Ceremonies will follow the next day.
